Murphles

Well this is a bit tangential-but when I realized that my career was not all that I hoped with respect to life satisfaction and my darlling children would be soon leaving- I realized that Iwould actually have to figure out what I was all about. I know that having loving relationships with other women is really important. I am blessed with really good friendships with women. Having said that, I am not particularly good at this. I have always been a introvert. But it is the most important part of my thirties and forties. I really did not got that my women friends were so critically important when I was younger. I have alot of adventures planned for the next stage of my life. I am really excited about it. My life is ssooo full with plans. And that is OK. I really thrilled with my lifeoptions. My friend is going through a really hard divorce. Now what I hear in this post is really what I asked her-what does she want in five year. She could not answer this questions. My blessing is that, with much reflection over the last few years, I know what I love so much more. It lead me in part to lap band surgery. I am really blessed.

Oh gosh, I hope I am going to be a Mayer

Bless your hearts-what a great thread! OK I want a bikini body! I also want a million dollars. Last I looked-gravity happened. Ten pound babies happened. Varicosities happened. Even when I was 125 and 5'11', I was not really comfortable in a bikini. So do I want to look hot. Damn skippee I do! One of the reasons that I want this surgery is because my body really does "feel right". My sexiness is from within but I can't feel my "groove" at this weight. I don't carry my weight well (just NOT a big beautiful woman). I am not sure what weight I will end up-I have no specific goal. I am more interested in how I feel-almost anything would feel better than this. Can I just emote:angry -can I just say that Desperate housewives and media women just set up some really unrealistic expectations for the rest of us. Of course, some of them have really great genetics. But there is a entire trade of folks in the media just to maintain women in crazy good appearance. In the real world in the Midwest-I know no women that look like that-OK except for maybe some stay at home very wealthy moms. But I know lots of women who look really great. And when I think what I want to look like it is more like these women. Is Plastic surgery out of the question? Of course not-I am getting a lapband. And I really want a tummy tuck-my belly was always poochy and babies did not help at all. Oh my god, and I am getting seriously jowly. Hot is in the heart.

Oh my gosh you have done so so well. You should be so proud. I am so proud for you. If I only do so well

Nobody said that someone's needs for explanation makes them a child. But not all instructions can be explained to everyone's satisfaction-for many reasons. Sometimes patients emotional situation does not allow them to process information particularly well in the moment. Sometimes individuals education level makes it almost impossible to explain all of the science and statistics that go into a decsion making process. Sometimes, there is no no "evidence" to support one path do vs another. Today I counseled a patient. He too had an implant and his surgeon wanted to take it out and replace it with another for a nonFDA approved indication for this implant. There are no series of patients like him that we can look at for success. I can give him information and an opinion. Oh for those of you that are concerned that your doctors are deviating from recommendations-yikes, 90% of medicine is really not studied. If we did only what the FDA recommended today-all would come to a screeching halt. Or my favorite, aspirin and tylenol would never ever be approved today. I can give patients information. It may or may not be something they can fully "get with ." I can so do my best-but you, the patient, have to own your responsibility for your health. I think this debate and this support network is just that-an example of individuals seeking out information and understanding. I am really greatful for being a part of this.

oh my gosh-I am not worthy!!!

Oh my gosh-thank you for bringing up this issue. I feel so guilty. I don't know why. I am a lower BMI and why can't I just "boot camp" it. I know that I can't. What if I get complications that cause my family more expense. I know we can afford it-but that means other financial needs and issues won't be addressed this year. I feel so bad about this that I can't schedule my surgery.

Boy, you are off the site for a few days and all heck breaks out. I am a medical professional. But I have to say DDeidre really answered the"medical question" about as well as it is going to be answered. All food other than Clear liquids will make the stomach churn and even clear liquids to some extent. I expect the original conception was to decrease the bulk in the pocket while the band is scarring in. We limit patients getting an implant for other reasons from certain types of activities to allow this scarring to hold the implant in place. Lot's of people do not fully follow these restrictions and have no complications. Some people follow their restrictions perfectly and do have complications. Most post op instructions for almost anything is not studied-it is based on a surgeon/physician's underlying knowledge of physiology and pathology and his or her experience. A second point that has been alluded to here but let me answer "medically". We screen all of our implant patients psychologically. One of our main issues that we look for (and there are many others) is compliance. We look at things like how well the individual respects authority and follows orders. The reason is just like the lap band-lack of compliance-no matter how wonderfult the implanted device-will lead to failure. Some implanted devices do not require a whole bunch of patient compliance (heart defibrillator comes to mind) but most others do require that the individual be on program. As a health care provider-a patient coming in with the question-Why not cheat?-would be a major red flag. Not that informed consent is not incredibly important-I spend tons of time on it-but there are so many things that I can't fully explain and the patient just needs to go with me at the end of the day. Wow, talking about this as a healthcare provider almost seems.....dangerous. I don't talk too much in this voice outside of work because I hear from others so much how they feel their health care provider has failed them-and I listen to their stories and I get that. I feel bad because in total-most of us cannot ever fully be there all of the time for all of you. American health care sucks in its current organization and its health care providers are just cogs in the machine-when they spend extra time for you, it is taken out of the next patients time, or their families... Weight is a flash point for most of us here-if it weren't a point of passion and pain, we wouldn't be here. I think we can be passionate in our views-but it is difficult to be gentle in our words when we think that someone is harming themselves. And then the darn internet does not convey our compassion.

Well I have been sitting here and worrying and wondering about the LB for months now. I made my decision to have it and my husband asked me to wait until he had some contracts lined up (he owns his own business-but I work too). I did and he asked me to wait some more (he always worries about money). Finally, I said to him last night-just let me finance it and you can pay it off quickly when we get paid for the contracts. I of course feel guilty spending money on myself. Having said that-I need your ADVICE! Did you finance and how was that? I am travelling to Mexico (Monterrey)-anything that you all think I should Know about? (experienced traveler with a passport) I really appreciate your help!

bump-wow=only four answers???!

etoh is a bear for the dieter. 1. You must choose a low calorie drink 2. You must limit yourself to two to three drinks per evening. What I usally do is have one drink before dinner and two glasses of wine with dinner. At a party-always a challenge because people hand you drinks- separate drinks with a soft drink or bottled Water. And again-limit yourself to two. Good luck-you have identified a major weight loss barrier

I have to totally agree with your husband. I find TV and computer to be very addicting in the evening. I directly attribute my weight gain to change in activity level when I went to grad school. I had lived in a college town where I walked everywhere (parking was unavailable/too expensive). Then I would go run/weightlift/swim for fun. When I went to grad school you had to drive everywhere. My job subsequently was sedentary and my babies kept my busy. I think the support that we have here is great and really important. I think all modern people im america need to watch our lifestyles.

Our family's worst vacation was in Jamaica. I guess that it depends where you are. We had a house overlooking a golf course in Ochos Rios. My husband is an international businessman and a Marine-he is pretty much comfortable anyplace. My daughter was assaulted at the falls. We were shook down for money at the same place. While we were driving back to our house, rocks were thrown at our car. My good friend is Jamaican. They are good hardworking people. And then we drove down to Negril-completely different. But be very careful in the tourist spots and away from the tourist spots.

thank you so much for the info. I have posted before for this information. I am already planning on a tummy tuck after my weight loss-after two big babies, my tummy was never food. I still need to know about the port-but it is so good to kno people do this and survive. Good luck with all of your recovery!!:clap2:

it is so exciting to hear about your loss

None of my weirdest sex thoughts can I put here. I have to admit-all of this has got me pretty hot. Hubby and I have let things go as we "bloomed" as it were. The stress in our lives was satiated by food instead of right living. It is hard to be into the sensual pleasures when your bellies are in the way. I just don't feel all that sexy. Since I have decided that I was getting the band, I have realized I don't have to hide/exist behind the fat... Cool. REally cool. My husband just got a House of Blues membership and we have gone to several gigs. This is also reminding me of my wild youth. I am envisioning a life not trapped by the fat... That is pretty sexy

So glad that I had my children "early". So glad that I will not be facing a teenager in my fifties or paying for university when I want to be saving for retirement. So glad that soon we will be able to walk around the house in our skivvies if we want. I had my kids while I was completing my education. I used to get up at 4:00 in the morning to study. I was soooo sleep deprived. But it all worked out. Having said the above-our life journeys aren't yours-school and kids and marriage are all tough jobs and only you can figure out how to balance them. Good luck-with love and luck it will all be good

good luck on your procedure. I haven't been banded yet so I can't give you a whole lot of advice

i loved phen fen. I found I just didn't care if I ate and was easily able to make healthy choices. So-I have heard from some their obsession with food decreases and others state that they are super hungry two hours later... I don't think it as somuch was emotional eating but no appetite....

So how many of you have had tummy tucks after weight loss. Where is the best place to put the port. I had a poochy tummy after child birth-when I achieve weight loss I want a flatter tummy too.

Anyone out there?

Massively depressed. My husband has asked me to hold off on scheduling until he gets this contract for his business. I just feel like my life is on hold. I watch the days go by wondering how many more do I have to feel like this. I want my band birth day. I keep holding off on new projects in my life-I don't want to speak in public, I don't want to go out dancing, I don't want to do my hobbies (which require clothes that I have to fit into). While I am scared of any surgery, everything else I have tried has failed. I am convinced this is the way to go....but I am in limbo land

Thank you for all of your kind comments. I know that I should not stop living-and of course I have not-I have two teenagers-one can never stop. But I am self conscious. I have not been heavy all of my life and I know the difference. Certain kinds of activities such as dancing, speaking in public and horseback riding. (cover your eyes-certain sexual positions ). My husband has not said no and he is incredibly supportive. He just asked me to wait. And today, right now, that is tough. Just the idea of another summer not embracing the acitivities that I enjoy bums me out. And honestly, these activities are just not as much fun when you are heavy. I hate running and hiking when I am heavy-my legs rub together, I seem to get horrible sores on my feet, and my feet and joints hurt. I hate riding when I am heavy-first off there is a lot of stress on the horse. Second, I jiggle in ways that make it more difficult. Dancing-I, maybe not others, but I just can't find my groove with my belly in the way. So yeah, I know I am whining and I will get my head together-but thanks for the support. I am one of those people who once they make a decision are ready to go-AND I AM READY TO GO.

forget tiny bit jealous-I am way jealous-that is so totally cool (Uh, I have teens in the house!) But you catch my drift!:clap2:

I have heard his patients are very passionate about him! I really did not realize the difference in facilities. I heard that Ortiz was a bit of a mill.... Not that that is necessarily bad! Mills actually can be good-Studies show that lots of procedures usually leads to more competent physicians and teams-why do you think the Cleveland Clinic is so good at heart surgery! I just want to know that I am not just a cog in the mill. And what is so good about Rumbaut! Thank you for your time.