BlueIGT

I struggle with this also. I have everyone telling me I am so tiny now and skin and bones...which I don't see. I try to explain to them that what they see and what I see when I look in the mirror or at my body are two very different things. I don't deny that I am a whole lot smaller than I used to be, but thin and skin and bones doesn't really seem rational in my eyes. I am well aware that it is body dysmorphia . I do look at side by side pictures of before and after and I do see the difference. I don't still see myself as heavy as I used to be but I don't see the thin. Some days I can see it in my face and then the next day my face looks really puffy and big. It's a really strange game our minds play on us.

I also suffer from social anxiety which is probably why it took over 40 years. You're in the right head space, you want to make changes and maybe they will be baby steps and it may take some time for you to get there. But I believe in time you can and will do it. How much time, who knows. I just really hope it's not another 20 years. You're so young and it would be such a beautiful thing to get that out of the way earlier on in life. I have never felt freer and I wish that for you. Slow is okay as long as you keep moving forward. You've proven you're strong by overcoming an eating disorder on your own, you got this. Hold your head up high when you're out and about, if even at first you have to pretend that you belong or that you feel comfortable or that you are not self conscious keep doing it until you believe it truly, (because you do belong). And then one day you'll realize that you aren't pretending anymore and that you actually are comfortable in your clothing, with your body, with your choices and you won't care about other people's opinions because who are they anyway? Best of luck my friend.

I told my husband and that is the only person I told. I am not ashamed about having the surgery. I had two people in my family that had it and had no success with it, however they did not follow the program. I knew that I felt very dedicated to the process and I thought I would succeed and I didn't want to feel like I was rubbing it in their face. You really need to be in the right head space for this to be successful. You need to be all in and they weren't.

For the first few weeks I told people I had the flu. now with covid out there I guess I would pick a different reason, such as a hernia like mentioned above. I am also a private person, I don't really discuss any medical issues with anyone other than my husband so I don't see why this would be different.

It's a personal choice and whatever you feel comfortable with. You can tell people at a later date if you wish to, but once you let the cat out of the bag there is no putting it back in. I have not regretted not telling anyone about the surgery and when they ask for advice I give them advice from when I previously took off over a 100 pounds on my own (before gaining back due to the death of a parent and so much stress). Tracking food, drinking Water, being active and being dedicated.

If anyone brings up surgery I talk about it as I tell them I researched it and that it doesn't seem like a bad option either and suggest that they find forums that they can read about other people's experiences.

It took me many years of of being self conscious of everything about myself. I worried about what other people saw when they looked at me, worried that they were judging me. I let what I thought they were thinking about me stop me from doing things I wanted to do. I let what I thought they were thinking about me rule my world and my how I viewed myself. But one day in my early 40's I had a really good conversation with myself. I decided that on that day forward I would not let what I thought others thought of me affect me in anyway. In fact I no longer cared what others thought of me, I only cared what I thought of me. Some days I liked me, some days I didn't and that was okay.

I realized that I gave 40 years of my life to people I didn't know. Who cares what they think? Not me, not anymore. I used to walk with my head down so I could avoid eye contact. Then I started walking with my head raised high and I looked at their foreheads, not their eyes because I wasn't ready to make eye contact. But I held my head high, I was not ashamed of myself, or my weight anymore. We are all different and if they wanted they judge me based solely on my weight or what I ate, then screw them. The more I held my head high the more I really didn't care. It's my life not theirs. I spent so much of my life worrying about other's peoples opinion about me. Opinions I never heard, I just assumed that's what they were thinking.

At the end of the day, what other's think of me is none of my business. If they want to judge me without knowing me, it's their loss not mine. I am caring, funny, and loving person and honestly I have no time for judgmental people, they are downers and I want to live a positive happy life. If I could wish for one thing for anyone struggling with their weight or self image, I wish they would learn this lesson that I learned in my 40's when they were your age. I wish I felt this way back then. I wish you felt this way, it takes time but you can. Baby steps. You are special, you are not your weight, you are you, you are one of a kind. You are beautiful no matter what, you just need to believe it and stop caring about what other's think.

When I started this program my team told me I would probably not get below 175. So I set a goal of 160 just to push it a little further than they anticipated. Like others have stated earlier in the thread, I also am trying to go as low as I can so that when a few pounds creep back on me it'll be okay. My new goal is 140, however if I stayed where I was right now for ever I could easily live with it. Ultimately though if I could get to and stay at 140 that would be awesome.

21 minutes ago, Brent701 said:

You have jeans that you haven't worn in 26 years? Oh my I would love to hear the story behind that. Why did you still have them were they all the way in the back of the closet type thing?

I really liked the way I looked in them and I felt really confident in them. When I bought them I had lost 75 pounds, was in really great shape. Then life happened and I put them away because I thought one day I could wear them again (sooner than 26 years lol). They've been a vacuum sealed bag for a few years.

Congrats, I remember that feeling also with my towel. Watching the gap slowly disappear and now it overlaps. Great feeling!

I found a pair a jeans that I last wore 26 years ago, had hoped to wear them again one day but forgot about them. I put them on and zipped them up the other day. They don't look like they used to on me, my body shape is quite different at this slightly older age and body but it felt awesome putting them on.

I was active as a kid and didn't really run into problems until I was around 16. I don't blame my Mother (as I believe she was taught this behaviour), but her answer for everything was food. Bad day at school, let's get a pizza. Good day at school, good marks on a test, let's get a pizza. Going to watch some movies, let's get a pizza. Fight with your best friend, let's get a pizza. Food was always the feel good solution to every problem it seemed. I carried that with me for years. Stressed, let's eat, but not a little bit let's eat until I am so full nothing else matters. I would bury all my problems in a platefuls of yummy goodness that took my mind off of my problems temporarily until I needed to eat more to get some more relief. My Mother's side of the family are 90% on the heavier side, with some very heavy. Slowly they are dropping due to illnesses connected to obesity, and I didn't want to join them. As much I would love to see my Mother again one day I don't want to hurry my time here on earth, after all I am just starting to live again.

It's still a struggle, on really stressful days my mind instantly wants to go empty the cupboards. Thankfully that isn't humanly possible for me anymore, but I have had some slip ups. I am working on other ways to cope, keep myself busy and not turn to food. But like all of us, it is a life long struggle and it 's something we will have to work very hard to be and stay successful at.

That was one of the first things I did also once I lost enough weight. I could go on all the coaster. All the rides really but I passed on the spinning ones, no ty. But the coasters, fun fun fun! I am glad you got to experience them again, enjoy!

I had my first drinks over 8 months out at a wedding. It didn't take much and it hit me rather fast. Eating something took it all away. But having another drink brought it all back full force. Then I ate something else and it was gone. It was a strange experience for me. I didn't have any hang over the next day or anything. I had about 4 drinks over the course of the evening. I was never really a drinker, I would drink maybe once every 5 years or at some social event that I was uncomfortable at because of my size and needed liquid courage to get through the event.

I don't think I will have transfer addiction because of it and I don't crave another drink. Everything in moderation.

A couple years prior to wls I had lost 90 pounds on my own with tracking my food and exercise and I did it in 9 months. I did put it back on the following year after falling into a depression over the death of a parent, the 90 plus 10. The month before surgery I started talking to family/friends about getting serious about weight loss again. If they asked how I was doing it I would say the same way I did last time, tracking my food and exercise, which is true I am doing those things.

While I was recovering from surgery I told family/friends that I had the flu and it was kicking my butt. This became the reason I couldn't be social for a while or wasn't up to doing much... still getting over that flu, man it was a tough one. It worked for me.

Every time I see the nutritionist she wants my intake up. First time I seen her after surgery I was getting under 500 calories and she wanted it up to 1000. I didn't listen and I was stalled for 2 weeks. I then went up to 700 calories and the weight started coming off again. Now I am up to about 820 a day and was losing but have stalled. Scared to increase but I will try after I've exhausted other options like drinking more Water or getting more exercise in. I believe we need to listen to our bodies and figure out what works for us and what's healthy for us.

I weigh daily in the morning. I tend to weigh myself before I go to bed at night so I have an idea if I will lose or not in the morning. I weigh daily to keep track of how I am progressing and if I stall I try to tweak something, whether it be upping my calories a little, making sure I get enough Water, trying to be more physically active, etc, to get the numbers moving again.

I think it really depends on how the scale and seeing your weight affects your mental state of mind. Some people do well with doing it daily while it can really stress others out. Find what you're comfortable with and go with that. I don't think there is a right or wrong answer.

I had finished my period a week prior to surgery and when I woke up from surgery I had it again. Then the following month I was late and it lasted longer and once again came back after a week. I think it was similar the third month as well. The last three months have back to business as usual with 28 day cycles.

On the food topic, I personally stayed away from sugar up until a couple weeks ago (aside from yogurt in the morning). I was scared to try anything with a large amount of sugar for 2 reasons... 1, I would have dumping syndrome, 2, I wouldn't and that could be a slippery slope. Needless to say I was out at an event and they had ice cream there and I since I was heading home I decided to have a small chocolate cone. I had no issues.

Slippery slope here we come, I was out at another event and they had baked goods and I thought, hey I had the ice cream I can have a few of these too, so I bought them and brought them to a friends to share with her. I didn't have that much but I was in a world of hurt not long after, so sick, no dumping. I had to leave her place and rush home, thinking I would have to pull over at any time and another weird thing is I was yawning a lot. By the time I got home I had to lay down with a cold cloth on my head and just breathe until it passed which was about 45 mins or so.

So now I am back to being scared of sugar which is probably for the best.

I am averaging 6-7 pounds a month now. So pretty close to what you are losing. I feel like I am slow loser in comparison (which I know we shouldn't do) to others who had same starting stats as myself. As long as it keeps coming off I'll be happy with that. You are right, it all adds up, just keep on keeping on. We'll get to our goals.

Like @justmetj said, every doctor is different. I think testing also depends on your medical history and family medical history. They asked me about my sleeping habits and if I had any problems. I wasn't required to do the sleep test, which I was happy about.

16 hours ago, ConnCT said:

BlueIGT- I too did the liquid diet- just for one week pre-op.

I am seeing the same rate of loss as you- 10lbs/month. I think I’m frustrated because after years with weight watchers, it’s the same rate of loss with their program- 10lbs/month...making me wonder what needs to be done to get more out of my surgery.

Thanks for feedback.

I know that I lost faster prior on my own. But how many times did I go down only to go back up and then some. My hope is that with this tool I will get down there again and be able to successfully maintain it. It's ingrained in my head that I did not go through all this to put it back on, and I truly believe that will be enough to keep my head in the right frame of mind.

Even it takes a while @catwoman7 is proof that it can be done if we stick to it. I have hit some stalls and found I needed to increase either my calorie intake or my Water intake to get things moving again.

All the best to you.

I lost about 33 pounds prior to surgery. Close to 14 from pre-op liquid diet. Like you I am aware that people lose at different paces but I also feel like I am slower than most that had a similar surgery date and starting weight. I did however notice that most that were ahead of me didn't do the liquid diet.

Looking back at my app I was down 12.8 at week 5. I am 5 days shy of 5 months out and am down 49.1. So averaging roughly 10 a month, I can live with that. I hoped it would be more but I still have plenty of time to get down there.

On 06/26/2019 at 19:16, EmzBee said:

No Barium swallow 'till tomorrow, so I'm on ward leave at home, trying to get as much Fluid in as possible.

Going back tonight. Hubster is suuper-stressed right now. Not really about me, more about his own stuff -- but it all adds up. My goal for the day is to hold down the fort, hang out some washing, and try to do the things that will take the most pressure/stress off the both of us.



I hate being in the no man's land of not knowing how things will go, but that's reality at the moment, and I'm having to remind myself that it's important just to focus on keeping my stress and anxiety levels in check.

I'm still loosing! Even after pumping me full of 2L of fluids. I've got less than half a pound to go to break 200. Anyone got any great ideas about how to Celebrate once this hospital hiccup is all over?? I'm thinking of going to see the baby otters at the zoo or trying out a roller coaster I can fit on now! 🙂 Got to keep the positive ideas and energy flowing! We've all come so, so far ❤️

I love otters but I went last weekend and did the roller coasters... Woohoo fun stuff and 19 k steps in the process. Watch some otter videos and do the rides!

The surgeon actually told me I'd be a good candidate for Gastric Bypass. I was leaning that way myself. The idea of taking supplements forever didn't bother me as I was already taking most of them because I was a fussy eater. After researching more, like others have said I certainly didn't want gerd or to have to revise to RNY so I this was the best choice for me. I am about 3 and ½ months out now and I haven't ever really felt hungry, I hope it stays that way. I measure out what I eat, I have never really felt full. I have felt pressure and discomfort when eating to fast.

5 minutes ago, Transforming_T said:

Interesting. I’m using the Patches right now, but I’m using them with a dash of skepticism. I saw a ton of reviews saying they worked and their labs were fine. I switched to Patches bc the pills cause stomach cramping. Hmmm... 🤔
Good to know too about the Ursodial. It hurts my stomach too, but I get it’s a necessary evil. I’m increasing my Protein and Water to see if that will kick my stall to the curb.
Thanks for the info.

Water kicked me out of my stall. I just wasn't drinking enough, I knew I wasn't but I had no taste for it. I wasn't getting a lot of liquids in period. So I downloaded the baritastic app and set a timer for every 10 mins between certain hours to drink and since then I have been on a steady losing streak. I went from getting 48 to 64 Fluid ounces up to 96 to 120 per day and it was easy with the reminder to drink. Good luck with breaking the stall.

I like the Premiere shakes from costco. I did buy a Protein Powder online which I never ended up using yet.

I never found any sugar free popsicles either, but you can make your own out of a sugar free drink mix you like.

They also talk about Protein Water which used to be carried by Bulk Barn and some Shopper's Drug Marts, but not around here anymore, you may have luck in your area.

The only other thing I ordered online was from Bariatric Advantage, chewable calcium citrate, chocolate flavour. As the pills were horrible crushed, and I didn't love the liquid option available. I got a 4 month supply and once it's done I should be able to swallow the normal pills again with no problems.

Like a few others, only my husband knows. It's worked out well for me and I like it this way. Sometimes I wish I had other people in my life I could talk to about it but I don't want to open that door, because once it's opened it can't be closed again.

Congratulations! It's an awesome feeling.