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Everything posted by RuthD

  1. Ok here it comes! I am going to pour my heart to you and I truly hope this forum can help me out. So, I am 27 years old, live in Europe, have a decent education, have my own studio apartment, car, some savings, good sence of humor, I am still studying to become a Vet. In my teenage years I was a strong athlete, fit. Then I got injured and never fully returned to sports, but recovered. As the years gone by I have focused on my studies, graduated as bachelor of Law, did not feel as if it was the right path for me so got in to Veterinary School. I am very happy with that decision and career wise completely satisfied. My problem was always relationships. Even when I was quite fit I only had one boyfriend for shorter time loved him, but after sime time he broke my heart. Experimented with a girl, nothing too serious and the I got overweight, then obessed, not morbidly but obessed never the less. I strained from dating because I was ugly, have never put myself into possition to date, hid, ran from relationships like from fire. I had my surgery half a year ago, and little by little I gotten into a better shape, no where near perfection or my goal, but I look decent. I have not told anyone apart from my family that I had RNY and I am not planning too. Which I know will be a problem in my future relationships too. I think about dating but I am terrified! So scared. Firstly, I am not experienced, and shy when it comes to that, I don’t trust guys, always think they will make fun. Secondly, I am scared of people seeing my body, I have loose skin, loads of stretchmarks and still fat on my belly, and my chest is deflated and crepey crikly. I just want to cry every single time I think how unatractive it must be, and that no man would actually want to touch this blahhhh body. I started to excercise but of course it is not making a change that would impact the skin that much I just feel a bit stronger. I feel like I have told my self that I will be happy I just need to lose some weight, now that I’ve lost 35 kg I am sad , because I realised I am not skinny nor at my goal, and the skin problem is still keeping me from wanting to date. All of my friends tell me to get Tinder etc. but I just panick that I would disappoint the guy when it would come to sex and stuff. As they see me dressed I seem quite ok, but imagine the disgust when undressed. I do love myself but I am disgusted by the thought that a man should see ir touch such body. Everyone just assume that I get loads of attention etc because my personality is fun and bubbly, but truly I am lost. I want to be loved and I know I could love someone like no one else. I know I am the most loyal and giving person, and once I have my eyes on a person I don’t need no one else. But I am afraid that no one would have eyes for me. I know that with time I could get some plastic surgery to lift or tuck. But I feel like this would be just another excuse for me, to “just wait until .... and then you can find your love” type of thing. I am not getting younger too, I don’t have loads of time to meet new people because I work a lot. I don’t even know what I want people to advise me on, but please do ❤️
  2. RuthD

    Can anyone eat carbs?

    Eating carbs with no problem as long as it is paired with protein and not sugar or loads of fat
  3. RuthD

    Loose skin and sex

    I feel exactly the same way. I know it is a confidence thing etc. but so far I cannot overcome it so I just avoid dating in general
  4. RuthD

    I just wanna eat

    500-600 calories is that even enough?
  5. Cocoa nibs? There is no sugar just the nib, and cocoa has so many beneficial things in it. Also it is natural. I see no harm other than self control.
  6. RuthD

    Shirataki Noodles

    I’ve geard about them years ago and never came to actually buying them. Instead I used to buy lentil pasta. What is your thoughts on that?
  7. RuthD

    Sub to bread

    Why sadly?
  8. RuthD

    Sub to bread

    I miss bread! I just want warm peace if sower doigh ir some italian bread 🤤 with butter and salmon or cheese. God. I am RNY and only month post op. But I wonder will I ever be able to eat a sandwich/bread, what abiut tiny slice if pizza ir sushi? I thought after you are heeled you can induldge on rare ocasion? Please, someone who knows 😂
  9. Hello everyone! If you care to share I would appreciate! I am almost 3 weeks out, and it is time to order some supplements, as my surgeon told me I could start taking them after 4 weeks post surgery. Sadly, his list is basic and he advised me to talk to dieticians, which her respons was you need good multivitamin, calcium and B,D vitamins. In my country there are no specifically VSG vitamins, so I will need to make my own kit and order from abroad. What is your vitamin routine?Dosage? What are the brands, formulations to look for? Should I order Bariatric advantage? Anyone who lives in europe, could you please share where you order your supplements? What is the best supplement for hair? I know that: Calcium citrate is the best form. B12 needs to be Methocobilyn Thank you in advance!
  10. I’ve looked to amazon in uk, there are either old packages, old formulations or fakes. Which is sad. Thanks for the advise anyway ☺️
  11. Also Celebrate vs Bariatric advantage?
  12. Damn it I made mistake 🤭 I am not the VSG I am RNY
  13. Thank you both for the reply. I had RNY. The problem with the store here is that they only ship from USA which to the price of the product would add ankther 21% for duties and taxes 😢
  14. RuthD

    No regrets?

    I did get cold feet, but was only thinking about how life is going to be better after I lose the weight and everyone was feeding into that state of mind too. So as an insecure and I guess week person I took others advise and position as my own? And I do have regrets. So, I am not against surgery if it is what person deffinately wants, but I would say don’t rush it, if you have any questions, even if you think they are small, stupid questions, ask them, you can delay surgery, it is not the end, if you need more time it is ok to have more time. I know bunch of people will come for me for saying this, but If you have doubts, get them resolved before you do this MAJOR surgery. With that being said, I suppose feeling nervous is normal, as it will change your life completely and the unkniwn is scary.
  15. Hi, so I want to share something very personal. I know I will be judged for it but I have no other support. And because I feel like I am protected by this shield of anonymous I hope it will not haunt me but instead help me. I beg for understanding! So as some of you know I had doubts regarding the surgery RNY. I felt like with the support of members I got to the peaceful state of mind, prepared for what I should be eating and not, did quite a bit of research. I have noticed that in Europe (where I am from) there are no specific support groups and these types of surgeries are taboo to talk about, people are looked down for having them. So I haven't told anyone but my immediate family, and I also lied to two of my friends that I will have surgery for health purposes. My family was sceptic but I calmed them down buy telling how great it will be etc. Because I had to pay for the surgery most of the money was kindly given to me buy my mother. The surgeon gave me the date for the surgery in a month. So I felt like it was soon but by that time I felt I was prepared. So on the day of surgery I had doubts but as members said that was normal so I decided to follow through. As soon as I woke up I knew I have made a mistake. I feel like I have betrayed my body, myself, like it was the biggest mistake, irrational decission and that I was failed by the medical system in my country, as the leading up to the surgery is nothing as USA system. Yesterday I came to forum and read about the reversal and all of the horror stories of people getting sick even after years after surgery, fatigued and since that momment I cannot stop shaking inside, I feel paranoyed , so so so anxious, so emotional. I want to scream, I had so many nightmares in one night my heart is rushing. And the worst thing is I cannot tell anyone about how I feel as I don't want to be judged, but most importantly I don't want my family to feel like they let me do this thing to myself, like they have failed me. I know my mother feels so much guilt, as she keeps saying we could have tried harder for you to lose weight without depleating yourself. I am so afraid of becoming low energy, depleated of nutrients. I don't want my gallblader removed, I don't want kidney stones, I don't want the fatigue. I beg of you, please help me, tell me what to do! Has anyone has been in my shoes how have you got to the other side? Please don't judge me. Is the reversal possible? Would I be just like before? How iften does the complications occur? How long will I feel this way? I know I sound like the most stupid person in the universe.
  16. I will be honest with you guys. I still regret my surgery and I know I will for the rest of my life. It is not to say, that I am not taking care of myself now, I do try and make every single day count for the unbelievable mistake I’ve made. So I do my best to disregard the sadness and find the will to move forward. I have spoken to the specialist, but my mother is really what keeps me sane. I did so much research and read so many articles and have actually found almost all answers to the questions I had. So, the surgery is practically irreversible , just because they can put your stomach back togeter but we will never fix our nervus vagus, which severing it is actually the cause of dumping in most cases and is the cause of paresis. So even if you would put the anatomical part back, the function will never ever be the same. There is other things I found out, which I eish I knew before. I am sad that I did not have these questions prior ti the surgery as I was looking only atvthe benefits. And I know most of you, and now most of us, because I am in the same boat, are postive people who wants to believe that taking our vitamins and good food will provide the best outcome. If there are people doubting wether they should do it, please do you research, not just the surfice, in depth, scholar articles depth, nerves and anatomy depth. Is not to scare anyone, just for others to know what is actually at stake . I appreciate for the support and advise I’ve gotten. I can only wish you to have a wonderful upcoming year, for those who are looking to find, for those who found to keep. ❤️🥂
  17. Have you contacted the doctor? What was his inout after you told him the surgery was a fail and his fault? Did you sue him?
  18. I am afraid that later it won’t be possible to change.
  19. I just pray that there are people who felt or are feeling the same way and will come through with their experiences. If I could only take time back... to the morning of the surgery ...
  20. I had my surgery on 20th of Dec. If I would decide to do the reversal would I be the same? Would I develop health problem, or would I be the same as prior to the RNY?