Sheribear68

Count me in also as a fan! Okay so I’m feeling like I truly need to define a style other than “boring,conservative”. Lol

Thanks. Yup it’s in the 20s right now.

My first sweater dress ever and no spandex, just fleece-lined tights underneath.

Much of my hierarchy is in line with fluffy’s. That being said, now that I’ve hit goal weight, I’m finding my inner narcissist and I’m doing my best to improve appearances. My husband fell in love with me and married me while I was MO. a huge benefit to a second marriage is that neither of us were young and we could see beyond the physical. My husband is happier now bc I am happier now. He has always indulged me—it was a financial sacrifice to do this and plastics will be even more, but he’s willing to sacrifice with me and for me bc of how happy and healthy I am now. The biggest boost I’ve received over the last 9 months is that people treat me so much differently now. It’s not fair—people should be treated the same regardless of size— but that’s simply not how the world works. People are nicer and more willing to talk,take you seriously, make eye-contact ,smile,help you more when you’re a “normal” BMI.

Very interesting thoughts on BMR and what factors may or may not influence it. Like many post-menopausal women, I just KNOW I’ve got a sluggish metabolism. I’m months behind many of you guys, so I also know I’m still a honeymooner for sure, so I’m really hesitant to push any boundaries at this point. I can’t help but wonder if there’s some super-secret recorder in my body keeping track of every bad choice I’ve made since surgery and is just waiting for the honeymoon to be over so it can punish me with outrageous regain. Yes, that’s not the worlds most rational thought process, but there are days where I still feel so frustrated with my slooooooooooooooow loss thus far and my inability to shake off bad days. I’ve had a couple of wicked stalls that still haunt me bc I feel as if valuable honeymoon time got “wasted” and even though I really do know better, it still gets to me. I’m frightened to move forward. I keep telling myself that I need to lost “just a few more pounds” to give myself that cushion. I’m not weighing myself often-which is probably the best thing possible right now for my mental health- because I’m afraid to see a number higher than goal weight. I’m particularly struggling this week due to the crazy schedule and constipation. Tomorrow will definitely be a mom day (5 days no poop now) and eating even small amounts is making my tummy feel overstuffed because of said constipation. I feel gross and completely stuffed to the gills and I just had a dinner of about 1/2 cup pork and salad.

I have, but on 2 previous days this week alone it would’ve put me eating after 10pm. First, the thought of eating that late really freaks me out. Second, my work schedule this week is 6:30a -5-ish (or whenever I finally cant take anymore and I’m tired of working unpaid— stayed til past 6pm those nights) If I’m eating past 10pm, I’ll never get enough sleep. My restriction still causes me to experience extreme nausea/stomach cramping if I try to eat within a few hours of waking up. Usually I can stand to have more than coffee with some milk about 3+ hours after waking up. Before that and I feel extremely ill/bloated/crampy and I don’t drink very much water.

I love that dress on you! It definitely seems like it fits well and you look comfortable in it. I can sympathize with the whole flats thing— my job is and always has been 100% on my feet and it’s critical that I take care of them which means expensive and (for the most part) not-so-cute shoes so I don’t cripple myself. Your flats are super cute though and go well with the outfit

Omg I love the whole look. Gotta know where you got the leggings

Same. ???

Anna, I also have the same issue. My plan is to start with consults starting in February. I want to wait til 12 months out to make sure all the weight that’s gonna come off is off

Okay so I just know this is going to be me as well. Honestly it’s one big reason why I’ve decided to weigh myself 1-2 times monthly now because I’m still eating under 900 calories most days (and under 700 twice this week my accident) and I just don’t want to know exactly where I am. And yes.. with my current restriction if the unexpected happens like a coworker calls in, then I’m too busy at work to even eat the food I’ve stuffed in my pocket and skip through 5 hours of my 8 hour eating window and I literally can’t make it up when I get home. So far it’s only Wednesday and I’ve already worked over 40 hours this week with no day off scheduled til Saturday. Lol, I ran out of iced coffee and don’t have the ability to make it at work so protein shakes are out also. I’ve “made up” for it by drinking over 80 ounces water daily by 4pm so I can actually eat when I get home and I can definitely say I’m probably losing water weight this week. I could grab crap (we have candy bars on every work surface) but I refuse to compromise

???? It’s too late and I’m too tired so I’m posting to bookmark this thread

Okay so currently the memory I am most grateful for is the memory of what being a cancer patient feels like. I can remember waking up feeling like crap and crying in the shower as I drug my exhausted, chemo-filled body up for another day of work and single-mom stuff. I was 40 and had a 12 and 16yo and nobody really to help me. I didn’t know if I would see the next holiday, or next year. How many of my kids milestones would I miss? Well I made it through, but it made me even heavier then when I started. I gained from the mid 220’s up to almost 250 while I was on chemo for a year, as incredible as that is to believe. During the last 10 years my weight has fluctuated between 202-272. I started to forget what being so sick for so long felt like and I started to become hopeless I would be able to lose excess weight. Quite honestly I was getting comfortable with being morbidly obese. I found (and married) the love of my life, and he loved me no matter what my weight was. Then in early 2018 another cancer scare: I had to take a good, hard look at how I’d been (not) taking care of my body since round 1 of cancer and I didn’t like what I saw. The #1 risk factor for cancer is obesity. Luckily the scare was just a false alarm, but it got my attention and I started desperately looking for something—- some tool I could use to help me exit the roller coaster of metabolic syndrome Well that desperation led me to WLS, and for that I’m thankful.

Thanks so much everyone for the positive feedback and the sensible advice. I’m still not sure which way I’m going to go yet. My addictive personality, perfectionism and type A persona some days wants to see how far I can go. My science-brain and logic centers counsel against getting carried away. Honestly I’m leaning toward the 80/20 rule and seeing if I can IF and keep carbs under control 5-6 days weekly and then allow myself a little flexibility the rest of the time and see where my body settles. If I gain weight, then I know how to get back on track. If I lose weight, then I’m wearing looser clothes If I lose A LOT more weight (over 10-15 pounds more) then I’ll really start to get worried and will have to come up with another plan. I truly feel like another 5-8 pounds of fat being lost wouldn’t be the end of the world and my skin is already hopeless in places. Then of course is the question of if/when my body settles into a different shape. Good news for me is that the first place I would have plastics would be some kind of facelift so I still have more time to see where everything’s gonna settle.

Okay so seriously if you figure that out I need to know! Holy smokes you’re teeny-tiny now.

Okay so serious question her guys: I’m now 152.4 (GW was 155) and I’m toying around with the idea of losing another 5-7 pounds before calling it quits. I’ve had this idea for a couple of weeks, but didn’t know if it was something I should proceed with It feels so wonderful to be in maintenance, and part of me doesn’t want to go back to “almost there” So here is a pic I took today. I’m wearing the same dress as I was less than 2 months ago when I weighed 11 pounds more. I know for sure those numbers bc I checked my weight log against the pics. Seeing this difference in me makes my inner narcissist think about losing more. Do you guys think I will look “too skinny” if I lose another 10? Is it even feasible to lose >100% excess fat?

So this is a VICTORY! When I first got this dress in mid-September, I was so psyched bc a medium fit me and I proudly wore it Well, it’s been in my closet un worn for a few weeks and the difference is AMAZING. I’ve only lost 11 pounds between the 2 dates. The left side is today, the right was from about 7 weeks ago.

This is mostly how I feel about drinking. Every single time I’ve indulged it’s been with forethought. When I had a horrible night Thursday, I thought about opening a bottle, then realized that I didn’t have the calorie allowance for it, and my eating window (I practice IF) had closed for the day anyways so I had a hot tea (with a packet of truvia) instead. I did have a mis-step this week and went for an extra margarita and skipped dinner, but that was a choice I’ve only made about 3-4 times in the last 9 months and I can live with it. As long as I can enjoy the occasional night out and alcohol indulgence without gaining weight and wrecking maintenance, I’m totally fine with it

Re: transfer addictions: I’ve known a couple of WLS friends who have experienced alcoholism as a transference. My advice to anyone with ANY kind of addiction that they suspect might be due to transference seek the help of a therapist. Before WLS I drank 5-6 days a week. Usually it was in moderation, but there were times I would’ve had what I called “too much” 1-2 times monthly. After WLS that has changed, but I didn’t turn into a teetotaler either. I still have my “usual” alcohol cravings— like when you have a work shift straight from the depths of hell and by-Gawd need a glass (or bottle) of wine to make it better—kinds of cravings. I actually drink much less often and much less volume than I did prior to WLS —much like I eat less often and less volume. I’m okay with this and plan on living like this for the rest of my life. For me, balance is key and quite honestly would be extremely depressed if I thought I could never have another glass of wine or a bit of bourbon over ice again in my life. I’d rather never have another bite of pasta,bread,rice,potatoes (things I still haven’t had yet since WLS) than forgo the occasional cocktail.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this.

Not in that way, but I’m experiencing a form of negativity in the form of not really hanging out much with friends. Lately all it seems like I’ve experienced is cancelled plans and lame excuses and it’s getting old.... really, really old. Honestly it’s at the point where I’m not even posting pics on social media anymore in the hopes that some of these guys will forget that I lost weight...

Extremely creative! lol, there are days when I have a rough day at work and that’s about how my make-up looks when I get home

This is a great lesson to keep in mind and thanks for sharing it. I had a couple of less-than-stellar days this week due to life and work stresses (my shift on Thursday night made me want to shotgun an entire bottle of wine when I got home) and I strayed off path Tuesday. Lol, 3 margaritas and a handful of tortilla chips and guacamole. By the time my street taco arrived, I was into margarita #2 and couldn’t hold any food and drink at the same time so I —to my shame— chose drink and let hubs have my dinner. My hangover on Wednesday was such that liquid protein was all I could handle til dinner. But hey! I actually did a Pilates class, so there’s that. I think I had maybe 550 calories Wednesday so I felt completely unbalanced on the whole. Got on the scale this morning for the first time in over a week and I was down 0.2 pounds from my last weight. So today I finally allowed myself close to 900 calories as my paranoia from Tuesday’s margarita-fest is subsiding. I still need to work on this whole maintenance thing, but I’ve got the next 2 days planned and I’m actually going to give myself two 12 -hour eating windows for tomorrow and Monday so I can mindfully add in more calories and some extra (healthy) carbs.

Well thank God wine isn’t on that list! ??? Okay so I’m post-sleeve (2-6-19) and I just moved into maintenance last month. My weight last week was 152.6, but I’ve decided to only weigh myself 1-2 times monthly now and use how my clothes fit and how my body feels as a guide. My main goal for November is to survive it. 2 of my 3 work partners are taking vacation this month and I’ll be working all but 3 of my days off before Thanksgiving. Then I’ll be leaving on my own trip the first week in December so all Christmas decorating and shopping will need to be done in those 3 days off. No pressure.

This all makes perfect sense. That being said I’ve always loved wine and never will stop loving it. One thing that’s changed is that I’ve had to change to whites rather than reds. Now the reds really irritate my stomach. I also try to limit myself to one drinking day per week (as opposed to 5-6 days pre surgery) The empty calories suck, but I’d rather eat less during the week and have a glass or two of vino weekly to deal with life.