Louisa Latela

I have found that a majority of my clients who struggle with compulsive eating have historically ignored their gut: both literally and figuratively They have spent a lifetime not listening to their body’s (gut’s) hunger and fullness signals as well as not listening to their intuitive knowing (gut instincts).

When we do not pay attention to our intuition there is a low level anxiety/energy that constantly runs in the background of our mind/body. And we consciously (or not so consciously) think things like “I know I should speak up for myself at work, but I don’t want to make waves.” “I really should have an omelet for Breakfast but the donut looks good, I know I’ll feel sick afterwards, oh it doesn't matter, I'll eat better tomorrow.” “I never should have volunteered to do that project: I don't have the time, but I didn't want to disappoint my friend.” “I know my partner treats me disrespectfully, he doesn’t really mean it I know he wants to change. I’m gonna keep my mouth shut and hope he changes soon.” etc. Having all this background chatter is annoying. Guess What?? Overeating or eating foods that make you sleepy or foggy is a GREAT way to dull that noise. However if you want to lose weight and keep it off in a healthfully, you must learn to respond to your overeating triggers in positive, self nurturing way. If ignoring your intuition is one of your triggers here is a simple way to begin to notice your intuition. When you make a commitment to "playing around with this" you will undoubtedly begin to be more aware of your gut instincts in more important areas of your life: relationships, work, health. Once you start to trust your intuition you will continually be guided to people places and things that you support you in your Quest to life a healthy joy-filled life!

This comes from my Nurturing Nudge # 55

Go With Your Gut!

Practice listening to and acting on your intuitive hunches. If this is a new concept for you, start out with small things like trusting your gut when it comes to getting in the fastest moving line at the bank, or finding a great parking spot. In these instances your intuitive hunch is the very first feeling/thought/inclination that comes up when you pose a question. For instance your intuitive hunch might be to get in a longer line at the bank, something your rational mind would argue. But I challenge you to go with your gut. More times than not I bet you find that your intuitive hunch was right. Another easy way to better trust your instincts is to call or email a friend when the thought of them pops up in you mind. Whenever I do this I usually find that my friend was just thinking about me or that he or she needed my support at the exact time I reached out to him/her.
This is great practice for learning to live your life in connection with your Higher Power, your Intuitive Knowing, which will always guide you to act in ways that are loving and respectful to yourself and others; that support your Highest Good.

Know this: You have all the wisdom and knowledge you will ever need inside you. Practice accessing, listening to, and acting on its promptings. When you do this you might be surprised to notice that you experience a feeling of lightness and increased energy, a greater sense of well being, and a sense of things flowing easily and effortlessly!

It is soooo cool to follow your instincts and see that they were right on even when they made no logical sense!

Kinda makes your heart giggle!!

AFFIRMATIONS

I trust my gut!

My intuition guides my every action!

The more I listen to my intuition the louder it speaks!

My gut rocks!

Live In Love 😘

Louisa

If you've had weight loss surgery but found that you've regained some weight this group may be a valuable resource for getting back on track. https://www.eventbrite.com/e/lighten-up-tickets-53027486640?fbclid=IwAR3hCtIcVvH46SlVTyyOEN-vzTbBPc7OiMEoahTlWxokL1qHuOLAhOpIukg

I find there is a group of people who KNOW how to eat right AND they understand emotional eating: they KNOW there are times when they want to eat because they are sad, or anxious, or bored, or to Celebrate. But even with this acute awareness they STILL struggle with YO-YO Dieting. Does this sound like you?

If so you might be an EMPATH.

An empath is a person with the ability to sense the mental or emotional state of another individual. An empath can psychically feel the emotions, feelings, energy and even thoughts of others.

A few common traits of an empath:

Highly intuitive

Emotionally sensitive (often labeled by others as “overly sensitive” or “too emotional”)

Can feel in their own bodies the emotions of others

Often absorb other people’s energy

Frequently feels overwhelmed in crowds

Typically have accurate initial gut feelings about people/situations

Need a lot of alone time

Have big hearts and can be taken advantage of

Because they can see and sense problems (and what needs to be done to resolve them) in other people’s lives they often feel responsible to fix them.

What’s all this got to do with food?

If you are an empath there is a good chance you are not using food to manage YOUR energy but to manage OTHER PEOPLE’s energy. It’s like you are psychic/energy sponge who absorbs other people’s energy throughout the day, whether it be the co-worker who is cranky, the happy giggly girl in line at Target, your good friend who is going through a break up, or the heated political debates on television.

When you unknowingly absorb these energies you can be left feeling anxious, drained, depressed, overwhelmed, and even confused by the end of what seemed to be a normal, productive ‘uneventful’ day. Such feelings can be a trigger to overeat. If you are familiar with emotional eating you KNOW that overeating is a good way to escape or calm such emotions.

So what’s an empath to do to stop from picking up and taking on everyone else’s emotions?

1. Start to notice energy. Notice how you feel in different situations, around various people. Connect to your body: does your body feel calm and relaxed around this person or uptight and anxious, do you have a knot in your stomach, are your shoulders scrunched, do you feel the need to be defensive, or do you feel calm and safe? Notice how you feel in a cluttered room vs. a bare room, how you feel listening to different music, how you feel when you wear certain colors, etc.
2. Protect your energy; before you leave the house in the morning imagine yourself being protected by a sparkly white or golden bubble and the only thing that can penetrate this bubble is love and healing energy, no negative energy can get through this beautiful circle of light.
3. If you’ve been around someone who’s uptight anxious or angry literally brush their energy off your body with your hand. Hold your hands about and inch away from your body and brush around your head, down your opposite arms, down your chest stomach and legs. Or even just shaking your hands down by your side with the intent of shaking off their energy can help.
4. If you are in a conversation with someone who is angry or anxious you can imagine you are behind a one way mirror and everything they say just bounces right back to them, or imagine you are wearing a suit of teflon and everything they say just slides right off.
5. Stretch your body (we hold emotions in our muscles… when you stretch it helps release stored emotions).
6. Spend time in nature.
7. Walk barefoot in the grass.
8. Take a bath in epsom salt.
9. Create a transition ritual for when come home from an event, or work, or school, etc. It can be something like deciding to change your shirt and while changing your shirt ask that any energies that you've absorbed that are not yours be released saying ”I now release any energies that I may have absorbed that are not mine. I send them to be transmuted to light and love and sent back to their rightful owner!”
10. Spend time near water.
11. Meditate.

I am seeing this more and more in my practice that energy sensitive people often struggle with food or some other addiction as a way to manage all the intense emotions of the world these days. If this article resonates with you it is important to understand that this is very real and that you begin to truly honor your intuition and energy sensitivities. Then set out to learn positive self nurturing rituals to protect and heal you own energy.

I will be offering Zoom groups to discuss emotional eating, eating as a reflection of self love and respect, and learning to notice and protect your energy. If you have any questions or comments do not hesitate to contact me!

Set an intention to be loving and respectful to you every day.

Drink plenty of water every day.

Intentionally move your body every day.

Spend 5-20 minutes in sacred silence every day.

Say only Kind and Loving things to and about yourself

Say "Thank You" to compliments.

Listen to and speak with your body throughout the day.

Eat life-affirming high energy foods.

Pay attention to your intuitive hunches.

Notice energy.

Protect your energy (ask/pray that you not take on others' energy/anxiety, before you leave your house imagine you are surrounded by a protective shield/bubble that will only allow positive loving energy to penetrate, no negatively get get through... If you are talking with someone who is particularly negative you can imagine you are standing behind a one way mirror and everything they say to you just bounces right back to them, or you can "put on your teflon suit" i.e. nothing sticks!!)

Clear your energy: meditate, stretch, take a bath in epsom salt, spend time in nature, create a releasing ritual

Before you say or do anything take a deep BREATH…Connect with your inner wisdom and ask if what you are about to say or do will support your Highest Good. Intend that your words and actions be grounded in the energy of LOVE

Don’t say or do ANYthing that doesn't feel right.

Live in the moment (pay attention to your breathing: this will always bring you back to the present moment.)

Count your blessings/feel gratitude every day.

Be ever mindful of living in the energy of LOVE.

Live in Love,

Louisa

Stand by your Commitment, Shield Yourself from Negative Energies, and Your wishes Will Come True!!

If you’ve made a commitment to change your diet, learn a new exercise routine, start or complete a project, be more assertive, or maybe connect with your intuition on a daily basis, know that you DO have the POWER to follow through with this. Set an intention to connect with and magnify your inner strength and focus. Often when we set out to make changes in our life we start obsessing about it and think way too far into the future which can overwhelm us: then we just say “Oh the heck with this: I’ll never be able to do that huge project or maintain that habit forever, why even bother?” If you notice your thoughts going in that direction slow down, take a deep breath, and get out of your head and into your body. Come back to the present moment. Take another breath. Ask “Is there one simple thing I can do in this moment to honor my commitment?” That might mean just not putting a piece of chocolate in your mouth in this moment: That’s it you did it! And I know you can do that again in the next moment!! Perhaps you will be guided to make a phone call. Pick up the phone and make that call. Or, there might not be anything you need to do in this very moment so relax into the not doing.

It is important that you keep yourself surrounded by upbeat positive people and that you raise the vibrations of your surroundings as much as possible. Burn sage, put a crystal on your night stand or desk at work, keep plants and flowers in your environment, listen to uplifting music. Shield yourself from negative energies. Many of you who are drawn to read this are highly intuitive empaths: your are like psychic sponges who absorb the energies of the people near you and your environment. As part of your morning routine surround yourself with a beautiful white light ( or whatever color feels most safe and loving for you). The only thing that can penetrate this light is love and healing energies, no negative energy can pass through this. If you believe in angels, spirit guides, or any other sort of deity invite them to be with you throughout the day guiding you and keeping your thoughts and feelings uplifted and positive. Whenever possible remove yourself from negative situations, decline to engage in gossip or fear based conversations. Anger, negatively, jealousy and fear will only cause you pain. Clear your energy field daily: meditate, spend time in nature barefoot, take baths in epsom sales, move your body, drink plenty of Water, etc.

Law of Attraction/Source Energy is rooting for you and right by your side giving extra added energy to your thoughts. So keep your thoughts and focus on what you DO want to manifest. See yourself as happy fulfilled and loved….and know that is is so…..

Feel gratitude knowing that your life is moving in the direction of your dreams gaining more and more momentum as your willingness to believe and receive all that is being offered to you opens and increases. BELIEVE and RECEIVE!! I'm sending you so much love! Go have an awesome day!!

❤️ Louisa!!

@@Keri1019

Hi keri,

It is wonderful that you are so aware of your feelings. Like

• Torriluv87 said a lot of what you are feeling is normal. Another thing is that you said you've been changing your diet and are now doing the official pre-op diet. You may not have realized how often you use food to calm your feelings. Even if you weren't a big "overeater" different types of foods affect your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual experiences. So if you are eating less and eating different foods than what is your norm you might be more connected to and more intensely feeling your feelings right now. Again as Torriluv87 said it is important to acknowledge, feel, and process your emotions. Talk to your support people, journal, exercise, meditate. If it will make you feel better make sure you DO see your daughter before surgery. If you have any strong intuitive hunches that you need to get a second option or re-think having the surgery follow those hunches.... In the mean time keep breathing and focusing on present moment awareness. Look for the joy in this moment and don't allow the fear of the future rob you of the joys and miracles that are waiting for you today.... Wishing you all the best! Louisa

Practice listening to your heart, your intuition. Are there changes in your life you are feeling called to make? If so take action NOW.

Every time you deny you inner knowing, that small still voice within, you suffer and chip away at your self esteem, your self worth. Release the need to please others, to fit in, to go along with the crowd. Lovingly, assertively, and respectfully speak up for your self, speak your truth. When you deny your truth and ignore your feelings you can’t help but suffer: you may feel angry, sad, victimized, depressed, anxious, or overwhelmed, which often leads to engaging in unhealthy behaviors (overeating, drinking, smoking, shopping, etc) to numb the pain of these feelings. Life is so much simpler when you are authentic. You DO have the power to change your experience of your life. Don't complain. Instead FOCUS on what you DO want in your life, how you WANT to feel and what ALREADY IS GOOD... See yourself as being happy, fulfilled and loved… Keeping this vision/feeling in your heart notice the signs and follow your instincts as they will lead you to living an abundant joy-filled life… All day long check in with yourself to be sure your actions are GROUNDED IN THE ENERGY OF LOVE not fear, anger, or anxiety.

Live in Love,

Louisa

The biggest issue I'm seeing is people actually denying their weight is a problem. "Weight is just a number, it doesn't determine true health" or "I don't trust BMI, it says I'm obese and I don't believe that." So many people think they just need to hit the gym and eat "super" foods, and I want to shake them and say QUINOA will not help you, no matter how much you exercise, you can't train away a bad diet, and for the love of god, BMI isn't accurate, but unless you're a special athlete whose physician has done alternate means of testing to determine your bodyfat ratio, being obese probably isn't a good sign.

Im sure that's true in some cases but unless and until one is willing to see things differently and/or make lifestyle changes that will support long term weight loss there is not much that anyone else can do for them. If they are comfortable with their life there is no motivation to live different. The greatest gift you can give to someone is to live a happy joy-filled life.. People will be attracted to your joy and energy which often spurs a curiosity as to how you are always so happy and healthy!! Then they start to ask questions and may be more willing to look at their own behaviors and perhaps see ways they can change. Thank you for your response! Have a beautiful day!

Love this and btw I'm a mix of 2 and 3. It is so true, even after losing 94lbs Im still not happy like I thought I would be if I lost the weight. I've had years of therapy and I grown to love myself more and not blame myself for what happened to me but I realize i still have boust of self doubt and guilt for things I had no control over. My action were for survival but I'm not there yet and going backwards.

Sent from my SM-G930T using the BariatricPal App

Continue to be kind and gentle with you. If you notice you are slipping back into old behaviors reach out for the support you need. Think about reclaiming your power of your past and not allowing those persons/situations to still control you/your actions. If you feel yourself going backwards Im sure that's a sign you are in need of some self nurture so do something truly nurturing for your soul: journal, get a massage, take a bubble bath, go for a walk, spend some time in nature, color... whatever it is that will get you through those uncomfortable feelings without being self-destructive... Sending lots of good vibes and angel blessings your way!

I would like to add that a substantial number of people are just not willing to give up the foods that contributed to their obesity in the first place.

How many times do we read "I didn't get this done so I could be on a diet for the rest of my life!" and people who are basically waiting out their weight loss (or sabotaging it) so they can reindulge in their staple comfort foods.

The holiday poats are already streaming in: "Can I eat (insert off plan food here) at Christmas? It won't be Christmas unless I have Grandma's (insert confectionery items here). Everyone else will be enjoying (insert junk food here) and I just CAN'T resist!"

So True.. Until one can stop seeing "not eating certain foods" as deprivation and value the freedom that comes from "not eating them" or eating differently i.e. the freedom to move easier, to breathe easier to have more energy, etc... they struggle with disappointment and maintain that diet mentality. If one believes they can't resist that will be true for them. Though that doesn't mean that once in a while one can't have some of Grandma's Cookies... Its important to plan ahead for the Holidays.... that's a whole other article . Thank you for your response...

I have observed 3 traits common to most people who are unable make the lifestyle changes necessary to maintain healthy weight loss.

1. They believe that a particular diet plan, fitness expert, book, doctor, medication, or personal trainer holds the magic formula that will forever end their weight woes. They see the answer to their weight issues as lying outside of them and set themselves up to assume a victim status. You cannot turn your power over to someone or something external and expect to live an empowered healthy life. You must learn to connect with your inner wisdom and act on its guidance. In terms of your body and weight, you must get clear about your intention to treat your body with love and respect. When you do that and check in with your internal guidance, you know what you must do to have a healthy and strong body. You will be intuitively drawn to any external support you need like nutrition or fitness experts, books, or support groups. You follow what feels right and let go of anything that conflicts with your inner wisdom. You lose weight from the inside out, which really is the only way to make lifestyle changes necessary for you to be at peace with your body and food.

2. Inherent in the diet mentality is the core belief that being overweight is bad, which translates into “I am bad or weak if I am overweight,” and that the solitary act of losing weight is the key to happiness and self-acceptance. It promotes the thinking that “When I lose weight I will really love and accept myself and then I can be happy.” Actually, the opposite is true. Once you love and accept yourself just as you are, and give yourself permission to be happy, you will release your excess weight. Permanent healthy weight loss is a consequence of self-love and respect, not the cause of it.

3. The majority of their thoughts are focused on how much they do not like their body, and how much they don’t like being overweight. This way of thinking leads to feelings of anger, frustration, and depression, which attract to them more life experiences that leave them feeling angry, frustrated, and depressed about their weight and their body. Your life is a physical manifestation of your predominant thoughts and feelings. If you want to lose weight you must stop thinking and focusing on how much you don’t like your body and weight the way it is now. You must start to imagine and feel what it will be like to be at your ideal healthy weight, to be at peace with your body, to truly love and nurture yourself. You must look for ways and reasons to feel good regardless of your current weight!

Think about it.....

Live in Love!

Louisa

My message to you today is short and sweet...

Slow down......

Take a Deep Breath......

and Enjoy the Journey.....

You are exactly where you need to be, doing exactly what you are meant to be doing in this very moment.. You are perfect right here, right now.......Be kind and be gentle with you.....

My Pleasure Alex! It really is very freeing to take responsibility for our feelings and realize we can always choose to feel differently!

Feelings are not good or bad or right or wrong; they are just energy in our body. AND ....

.....All feelings eventually pass.Think about it: whenever you are really wound up, you eventually calm down, or when you are really depressed your spirit eventually rises. However; we live in a society that tells us as soon as we experience a feeling that doesn't feel good: OMG!!! Quick, have a drink, smoke a cigarette, run 25 miles, eat a doughnut, go shopping, do something... just don't NOT feel good! "Don't be sad, don't be anxious, don't be bored, don't be too excited, eat this; you'll feel better!!"

But, when your fear your feelings you assume a "victim status".

You become captive to your feelings. You allow your feelings to trigger you to do things that are often self-deprecating. I am suggesting that when you have an uncomfortable feeling: breathe into it consciously and gently. Do not stuff it or run away from it. Be with it. With curiosity and compassion ask yourself "What am I saying to myself that is making me feel uncomfortable (before you have a feeling you ALWAYS have a thought) and how can I see or think about this differently?" Ask what you are meant to learn from this feeling.When you embrace a feeling in this manner, it softens and and begins to dissipate. It is in these moments that you start to reclaim your power. You release your need for distraction and are able better able to really show up for and experience your life.

Know This: Every time you take an action the purpose of which is to avoid a feeling you lose power. Every time you act in a way that honors your Highest Good independent of your feelings you gain Authentic Power. Learn to love your feelings, especially the painful ones. They will lead you home to your Authentic Self.

Live in Love,

Louisa

louisa@liveyourhighestgood.com

www.liveyourhighestgood.com

Whatever you are looking for you will see… AND... When you change the way you look at things the things you look at change!

Tips for Improving Your Body Image:

• Accept your genetic body type: Remember that your weight, height, and bone structure are strongly determined by your genes.. Healthy bodies come in all shapes and sizes.
  

• Stop comparing yourself to others. How others look has nothing to do with you.
  

• Be media conscious. We are bombarded with media messages telling us our bodies are not perfect… Most fashion and women’s magazines focus on an ideal of beauty that is just not something that anyone in real life can be. Remind yourself that the body images you see are manufactured by make up artists, hair dressers, airbrushing specialists, fashion designers, lighting specialists, and cosmetic surgeons. Also know that many fashion models have eating disorders and are not able to maintain their low body weight in a healthy manner.
  

• Create a Why I Like Myself List. Think about all the things about you that you like… are you Funny? Creative? Honest? Intelligent? Think of all the reasons you deserve to love yourself and write them down. Remind yourself of all the things you are besides a body. Read this list daily and add to it every time you think of something else you like about you.
  

• Create a Body Appreciation List. Think about how your body has continued to show up for you no matter how much you fed or starved it, exercised it or not. Write these things down. Remember that your heart has continued to beat, your lungs continue to breathe, and your liver continues to detoxify your body. As well, maybe your body has learned a new skill, gotten stronger, taken you to the top of a hill, rejuvenated during sleep, or allowed you to comfort a child, share love with a spouse, or go shopping with friends!. Celebrate your body and the marvelous things it can do. If you’ve had Weight Loss Surgery note all the things that your body can do now that it could not do before. How has your life changed because of the changes your body has gone through? Read this list daily and add to it every time you are grateful for something your body has done.
  

• Stop thinking that thinner thighs are the answer to all of life’s problems. When you find yourself hyper focused on your body stop for a moment and ask yourself what you would be doing, thinking, or feeling if you were not obsessing about your body. What is this preoccupation stopping you from being present to in your life? Are you in anyway benefiting from focusing on what you believe to be your physical flaws? Commit to feeling the feelings that arise as you ask yourself those questions and really listen to the answers you hear/feel.
  

• “Act as if you” were comfortable in your body even If you are not quite “feeling it” yet. How would you walk, what would you wear, how would you speak to people, what kind of self talk would you be speaking, what kind of eye contact would you make with others? Use these questions as a guide for “acting as if”. Notice how it feels to carry your body with an air of love and respect.
  

• Speak (and think) only kind and loving words and thoughts to and about your body!! If you find yourself being critical of your body, stop and acknowledge that this will not support you feeling good about yourself. Then, respond to yourself as you would to a best friend. For every negative thing you catch yourself saying about your body, apologize to your body and say 2 loving/ appreciative things about your body.
  

• Make a decision to truly “nourish” yourself. Read a good book, take a bubble bath, schedule a massage, get a haircut, dance to your favorite song, make plans with a friend, take a nap, ask for a hug, give yourself permission to say “no”, meditate, pray.
  

• Make it your intention to move and enjoy your body: go walking, swimming, biking, dancing, do yoga, tai chi, etc… not because you have to but because it makes you feel so good. Your body deserves to be treated well.
  

• Surround yourself with people who celebrate and appreciate you.
  

• Say “thank you” to compliments without discounting them.
  

• Know that you can control your experience of your life by the thoughts you choose to think. How you experience your life is a direct consequence of your predominant thoughts and feelings. By making a decision about the thoughts you choose to think (which are the precursors to your feelings) you take responsibility for creating your reality. So if you decide to think about what is not good about your body you will attract to you experiences of your body not being good enough, and more than likely will live in a state of “waiting till things get better (i.e. my thighs get thinner)” before you can really be happy. If you choose to think about what is good about you, what you like and appreciate about you, you will feel gratitude and be more likely experience your life as abundant and joy-filled!
  

The next time you find yourself being critical of a particular body part, sit down and write a letter to that body part telling it exactly what you don’t like about it and how it makes you feel. Then have that body part write back to you telling you how it felt to read that letter. Then write back to that body part…….. and just notice what happens……….

If you have any thoughts or comments about this blog I would love to hear from you. You can respond below to this blog or email me at louisa@louisalatela.com.

When we are not living an authentic life inevitably we will experience some sort of discontent. However since we live in a society that promotes instant gratification and the need to always "feel good" as soon as some "not good feeling" shows up, we try to stuff it, drink it, run it, shop it, overwork it, away. By ignoring our unpleasant emotions, we are actually prolonging our pain and oft times reinforcing the addictive patterns we developed to help us "check out." Remember: Wherever you go there you are! In order to be truly free and know real joy and serenity, we need to be living an authentic life.

Are you Living Your Highest Good? Are you living from a place of connection to your Authentic Self? Do you really know how to show up for Yourself? If so you are living an Authentic Life. If you are living authentically your actions are a reflection of your Truth. You know and trust yourself. You are able to put insight into action. You quite naturally live your Highest Good. You are ever mindful of treating yourself with love and respect. You follow your bliss and create your own unique destiny.

At this point you might be thinking “Huh??? What does all that mumbo jumbo even mean?”

A simple example: If your body is telling you that you need to stop eating sugar and your are living authentically, you actually stop eating foods that contain sugar!! You don’t spend a lot of time making excuses or looking for reasons why you can’t do this. You cherish the good feelings and all the positive physical, emotional, and mental changes that are the result of you omitting sugar from your diet.

Change really can be that easy when you are connected to YOU!

Below I have listed Characteristics of Authentic Living

___You live your life with passion and purpose.

___You feel a profound sense of serenity deep within your heart.

___You are able to remain peaceful and centered even in the midst of chaos.

___ You know bliss.

___You are number one on your list of priorities.

___You feel really good about yourself no matter what anyone else says about you.

___You listen to your instincts.

___You trust yourself to make good decisions on your behalf.

___You are addiction free.

___You are honest.

___You are intent on living your life from a place that is grounded in love, not fear.

___You take good care of your body (eat well, drink plenty of Water, exercise regularly, get a good night’s sleep).

___You are comfortable speaking up for yourself in a way that is loving and respectful to all concerned.

___You are surrounded by people who support and Celebrate You.

___You live in a state of gratitude.

___You live mindfully, ever conscious of living in the NOW.

___You take time each day for sacred silence, to be still and listen to you.

Does this list describe you? Does it describe how you feel sometimes, but not very often? If you are like most people, there are times that you feel disconnected from your Authentic Self.

The good news is that you can find your way back home to You in any given moment. Look over the list of the Characteristics of Authentic Living again. On a scale of 1-10 rate how true each of the statements are about you. 1 being totally false… 10 being always true…

Then record any thoughts or feelings that surfaced while you were doing this exercise. Notice how many characteristics had a score higher than 5 or higher than 8 and how many characteristics had a score lower than 5 or lower than 3. Did you learn anything new about yourself? Can you imagine scoring a 9 or 10 on all the characteristics? Why or Why not?

With the holiday season in full swing you may find yourself in the company of people who you avoid most of the year, people who "push your buttons:" who can trigger you to be reactive or defensive. People who USED to trigger you to overeat.

A few things you can do to prepare for this:

1. Have realistic expectations. Don't expect them to all of a sudden be different this year.

2. Don't take their words or actions personally. (Whatever anyone says or does is a reflection of what's going on for them; it has nothing to do with you. Think about it: if someone feels good about themselves they see good in others, if someone does't feel good about themselves they won't see good in others; they will be angry, jealous, judgmental, etc.)

3. Set an intention to enjoy the holiday. Wear a Bracelet or carry something in your pocket that every time you see or touch it you remember to LOOK FOR THE JOY in this moment.

4. Every time you think of the person/people who you dread seeing say a prayer for and send light and love to them, envision them happy and healthy.

5. And if someone says something that makes you nervous or upset remember the 4 R's of Responsible Respectful Responding:

1. RECENTER: Take a deep breath. If you are anxious or upset you are not centered and your breathing is shallow. Taking a couple deep breaths will help you get out of your head and back into your body; to your Center wherein lies your power (when you are not centered you lose your personal power) .

2. REFOCUS: Remind yourself of your intentions for your life and Focus on how you can handle this situation (in a kind and respectful manner) that will support those intentions.

3. RELAX: Once you are Centered and Focused you can then Relax: do a quick body scan and release any tension you might still be holding.

4.RESPOND: Now instead of impulsively reacting (from a state of fear or anxiety) you can Responsibly and Respectfully Respond to the situation with Clarity, Calm, Compassion, and Confidence!

Affirmation: Recenter, Refocus, Relax, and Respond: That's how I roll!

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Live in Love,

Louisa

This is a blog I came across that I wrote 6 years ago on Thanksgiving Day, and felt it was worth re-posting. Enjoy!

I am writing this blog on Thanksgiving Day (2008). Quite naturally on this day many people stop to reflect on that for which they are grateful. Have you ever stopped to notice how you feel physically and emotionally when you are thinking in terms of gratitude? I know for myself I feel like I have a smile in my heart…my body feels light and content…and warm and fuzzy!!! Any tension that I might have been holding seems to dissipate when I am in a state of gratitude. I feel happy, content, and open to receiving that which supports my highest good. I have learned that in any moment I can choose to think in terms of gratitude and immediately change my experience of that moment.

For the next month I encourage you to challenge yourself to see the positive in all your life experiences, to see the lessons and opportunities for growth that comes through life’s most difficult moments, and to make it your intention to live in a state of gratitude. If you consciously choose to see the blessings in your life they will multiply for that to which you put your attention expands. Pay attention to what works well in your life, look for the positive in every person your meet, and choose to say only kind and respectful things to and about yourself and others. Focus on what you do want in your life not what you don’t; focus on what you are in favor of, not that to which you are opposed. For example are you against war or for peace??? Though someone who is against war my be for peace, if their focus is on opposing war their experience of life will be dramatically different than if their focus is on creating peace. They will essentially be at war with war (thus creating more war) instead of looking for opportunities to create more peace. This may take some practice. Often we have some negative scripts that we have been playing in our head for many, many years. Begin to notice them and consciously choose to turn them into positives. Every time you notice yourself thinking or speaking about something you don’t like or don’t want let that be a signal to turn you attention to what you do like or do want.

In terms of weight issues keep your focus on eating for good health and energy and eating and moving in a way that will support a light and fit body. Do not focus on excess weight, what you don’t like about your body or your need to lose weight. Envision yourself at your optimum weight… What are you wearing, how are you holding your body, how do you walk down the street, how to speak to other people, what are you eating, how does your body move and exercise? Really take the time to feel this, breathe the feeling in to your every cell… then begin to live your life from this vision. Start walking, talking, moving, and eating as if you were already at your ideal weight. It has been said that where the mind goes the body will follow. So,pay attention and consciously choose where your mind goes!!!!

You may want to keep an intention and gratitude journal. I have my clients write down their intention for their life every morning ( it can be “my intention is to feel peace today, or treat my body with respect today, or organize my closet today, or live in a state of gratitude today, etc…”). So, before they say or do anything they ask themselves if those particular words or actions will support their intention for the day. If the answer is no they change it to something that will be in line with their intention. Then before they go to sleep at night they write down 3 things for which they are grateful. It only takes a few moments to do this, but this simple exercise has been the catalyst for major positive life changes for many of my clients.

If you have any thoughts or questions about this blog or suggestions for other topics, I’d love to hear from you. You can respond to this blog, or email me at louisa@louisalatela.com. You will soon be able to listen to the audio version of this blog at http://yourhighestgood.podomatic.com

Wishing you many blessings, much abundance, and peace in your heart!

Live in Love,

Louisa

Often when we are trying to change a long standing behavior that no longer serves our Highest Good we are really hard on ourselves if we don't do it fast enough or "perfectly enough." We think that by giving ourselves a good stern lecture and punishing ourselves when we "mess up" we will be more likely to change.

You say things like "That's the last piece of candy I'll ever eat...I need to

exercise 10 hours today to make up for my messing up yesterday. I know better

I should do better. I must be an idiot. I don't deserve to succeed

for being so stupid. I'm disgusted with myself, etc."

This actually helps to perpetuate the "messed up" behavior instead

of diminishing it.

When you are struggling to change a behavior of which you

desperately want to be free (i.e. compulsive eating, chronic

care-taking, gossiping, smoking, gambling, drinking,

disorganization, etc), you need an emotional hug, not a beating.

When you love yourself through the rough moments your heart

softens, anxieties dissipate, and your struggle is transmuted into

acceptance and growth. You give yourself the space and freedom to

breathe and feel and be. It is from this place that you connect

with your authentic self; the Divine. It is from this place that you receive the inspiration and guidance and make manifest your grandest dreams!

Affirmations:

I am perfect in this moment!

I love myself unconditionally!

I say only kind and loving things to and about myself!

I always 'show up for me' when I am struggling to change...

AND

When I really 'show up for me' I no longer feel like I am "struggling"!

Live in Love!

Louisa

If you don’t trust and listen to your intuitive knowing (aka “gut feelings”) you can’t help but feel a little anxious. You KNOW when you are ignoring that small still voice within. You FEEL it. People often overeat as a way to distract themselves from the truth they are trying to ignore. Thus they disconnect from their body’s (i.e. gut’s) hunger and fullness signals.

Think about it: If you have a choice between eating 2 donuts or an egg white veggie omelet for Breakfast which will your intuitive knowing tell you to eat??? I bet it will tell you to eat the veggie omelet. However if you decide to eat the donuts instead, there will be a little sense of uneasiness in your body, a low level energy coursing through your veins. Even though you might try to justify your decision, the uneasiness is still there. This applies to every choice you make: Do I stay in this relationship or leave? Do I set a boundary here or not? Do I stay late and finish my work or leave early? Do I spend this money or not? etc., etc. Whenever you choose to not listen to your gut, you will feel uncomfortable on some level and overeating is a very effective way to soothe and ignore that discomfort.

Practice listening to and acting on your intuitive hunches. If this is a new concept for you, start out with small things like trusting your gut when it comes to getting in the fastest moving line at the bank, or finding a great parking spot. In these instances your intuitive hunch is the very first feeling/thought/inclination that comes up when you pose a question. For instance your intuitive hunch might be to get in a longer line at the bank, something your rational mind would argue. But I challenge you to go with your gut. More times than not I bet you find that your intuitive hunch was right. Another easy way to better trust your instincts is to call or email a friend when the thought of them pops up in you mind. Whenever I do this I usually find that my friend was just thinking about me or that he or she needed my support at the exact time I reached out to him/her.

This is great practice for learning to live your life in connection with your Higher Power, your Intuitive Knowing, which will always guide you to act in ways that are loving and respectful to yourself and others; that support your Highest Good.

Know this: You have all the wisdom and knowledge you will ever need inside you. Practice accessing, listening to, and acting on its promptings. When you do this you might be surprised to notice that you experience a feeling of lightness and increased energy, a greater sense of well being, and a sense of things flowing easily and effortlessly!

It is soooo cool to follow your instincts and see that they were right on even when they made no logical sense!

Kinda makes your heart giggle!!

When you release your need to control the actions and moods of others you free yourself to actually show up for you!

LET GO!!

Letting Go doesn't mean you give up.

Letting Go doesn't mean you don't care.

Letting Go simply means you relinquish your struggle to force things to happen a certain way.

You release your struggle to make people behave the way you want them to

(even if you really believe your way is the right way,

it is only the right way for you).

Letting Go means you begin to accept people and situations as they are.

Letting Go means having the courage to give up your idea of what you thought your life was supposed to be

and embrace your life as it is.

In Letting Go you begin to look at the world through kind and compassionate eyes.

You shift from living in the energy of judgement, fear, and frustration to living in the energy of unconditional love and acceptance.

When you Let Go of trying to control things that you cannot, you free yourself to control the one thing you can: YOU.

In Letting Go you give yourself the gift of finally

being able to show up for YOU!

Affirmations:

In releasing my need to control I set myself free!

The only thing I can control are my

thoughts, feelings, and actions...

Wow, that means I get to control how I experience my life!!

AWESOME!

When I stop trying to control others, I actually have the time and energy to take care of me!

Live in love,

Louisa

www.liveyourhighestgood.com

www.louisalatela.com

856.429.9799

www.liveyourhighestgood.com

www.louisalatela.com

856.429.9799

"The closer we get to uncovering ourselves, the more difficult it becomes to face the truth.

Sooner or later we stop running, out of sheer exhaustion and desperation, and turn around to face our image.

The pain that we go through during this revelation is negligible compared to the State of Grace that we enter into when we have finally moved on."

Christiane Northrup

I’d like to begin this article by emphasizing that not everyone who is in therapy or working to maintain long term weight loss must revisit their childhood in order to move forward. However if you feel guided to explore your past, the intention behind the exploration should be solution-focused and approached with a sense of self-compassion and curiosity. The purpose is not to re-victimize, place blame, or get stuck in re-telling old stories, but rather to help you understand how your reaction to past experiences may be contributing to your present-day struggle with food, weight, and negative self-regard. Once armed with this knowledge you can then respond to your world differently.

I have clients who absolutely know when they are eating in response to feelings other than physical hunger. They know when they are eating because they are stressed, or bored, or lonely, or as a way to Celebrate with friends. They are very conscious of how different foods affect them physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. They know which foods give them good healthy energy and which ones deplete them of that very energy. They understand the concept that every food they eat has a consequence that will bring them closer to living the life of their dreams–or not! Yet, they consciously continue to overeat and often choose to eat foods that, in time, will rob them of good health and vitality, the very thing they desperately desire. This often leads to feelings of self-hatred, shame, anger, and frustration. And yet it is at this time that they need more self-love, compassion, and understanding; not self-denigration.

It is apparent that while they have come to know the role that compulsive eating has played in their lives, they do not yet understand the source of their uncomfortable feelings, nor do they know how to effectively manage, tolerate, or process those feelings. On some level they are fearful of being their Truth. It is at this point when their journey to recovery often leads to exploring the past and discovering clues for creating a joy-filled future—one that is free of negative self-chatter and struggle with food and weight issues.

As part of this journey, many clients discover that they learned to ignore the voice of their inner wisdom at a very young age They sometimes find it helpful, then, to investigate the concept of healing their inner child. In this context I am using the term Inner Child to describe that part of you which is alive, energetic, intuitive, passionate, creative, and playful. It is the part of you that feels and expresses your deepest need for security and nurturing. It is also the part that carries the pain of unresolved past emotional traumas. It is the place where guilt, anxiety, shame, and fear reside. Your inner child is the part of you that knows your Truth.

If you find it unsafe to be your Authentic Self, to be your Truth, chances are you disconnected from your inner child. You may have even learned to deny her existence. This makes for a very conflicted, frustrated, and fearful inner child, who can make you—the adult—feel unsettled, anxious, or depressed. In an effort to ignore her cries to be heard, it would make sense that you find ways like overeating, drinking, gossiping, keeping your life in a state of chaos, chronic care-taking, overworking, etc. to distract you from the uncomfortable feelings associated with denying her existence.

There are several ways to reacquaint yourself with your Inner Child if you feel so inclined.

**Please be advised: if you have a history of physical, sexual, or emotional abuse it is important that you only do the following exercise with the guidance and support of a well seasoned therapist as it can trigger flashbacks and uncomfortable memories.

One way is to gather pictures from each phase of your life, starting with infancy. Set aside a few hours to go through these pictures. Choose a time when you are most likely to be present and relaxed and not feel pressured or hurried. Take a few deep cleansing breaths as you begin this journey down memory lane. Consciously set an intention to view your pictures through the eyes of love, kindness, curiosity, and compassion.

Be mindful of your initial gut feelings as you look at each picture. Do you seem happy or sad, posed or free-spirited? What kind of child were you: obedient, wild, silly, sad, serious, responsible? How was life at home at the time the picture was taken? Did everyone get along? Did you have lots of friends? Were you in school? Did you have any hobbies?

Notice any fluctuations in your weight as you review your life through the pictures. Are there correlations between your weight fluctuations and significant events in your life? If there are other behaviors you would like to change—like over working, difficulty setting boundaries, people pleasing, avoidance of conflict at all costs--can you discern from the pictures when you adopted that behavior? Can you understand how that behavior may have served to protect you as you were growing up? What are some other observations you can make?

Take some time to write about your observations. How did it feel to revisit your childhood? Were there things as a young child that you needed but never received? How did you learn to silence your inner knowing? How were you taught to express feelings?

Choose a picture of you as a child. It should be a picture that speaks to you. Look into that child’s eyes. Feel what she needs. Tell her what she needs to hear to feel loved, to feel safe, to feel wanted, to feel validated, to feel heard, to feel like she matters, to feel important. Let her know that she no longer has any reason to be frightened, or sad, or lonely because you, the adult, are there to love and protect her and will never again leave her side. Keep her picture in a place where you can easily see it.

Now, from this moment on, know that every word you say to and about yourself is a word that you are saying to and about that child. And every action you take will either honor and protect that child or not! Please think about keeping your word to that little child. She really deserves it!!

I recently asked one of my clients what she would have thought if someone had told her a year ago that she’d be doing inner child work. She was quite passionate in her response:

“No way, there was absolutely no reason why I would want to relive my childhood; unless I could be re-born a different child. I was very happy to keep that little inner child tucked away in a box, far away in the back of a closet. I didn’t want to see that little girl and I did everything I could to forget she even existed. She was hurt, traumatized, afraid, alone, and I don’t want to remember her, know her, and definitely not embrace her. The past is over and done. No, you have to be out of your mind to think I would want to bring her down and embrace her. Inner Child work, not on your life! You must be out of your mind!”

Needless to say my client is in the throes of “healing the child within”. .......

Know this: If you stop and listen to yourself... I mean really listen... you will always know how to act in a way that honors your Highest Good. You will always know the next right thing to do! (Isn’t that coooool? You already have all the answers inside you... It really is exciting if you think about it!)

I believe we are all born these perfect little psychic bundles of love. As infants, if we’re happy we laugh, sad we cry, hungry we eat, full we stop eating. We are our Truth in every moment and have no fear about expressing who we are or how we feel. In fact, we don’t know how not to take care of ourselves. It doesn’t occur to us to not ask, or for that matter demand, that our needs be met.

But soon after our birth, we begin receiving millions of messages that it is not okay or safe to express our Truth, to follow the natural flow of our Soul’s Wisdom, to ask for what we need.

These messages come in the form of statements like—

“Ooohh, stop crying!”

“That didn’t hurt.”

“Big boys don’t cry!”

“Children should be seen but not heard.” “That was a stupid thing to say.”

“I don’t care what you want to do; you need to do what I tell you to do.” “Never let other people know that our family is not perfect”

“You can’t possibly be hungry now.”

Or maybe the messages took on a physical form and you were beaten when you expressed a feeling or spoke out of line, or even for no apparent reason.

Over time after being bombarded with messages like these, even though many of them may have been said with the best of intentions, you stop looking inward for guidance; you learn to silence your sacred voice of wisdom.

Then one day someone comes along and asks you, “What color is the sky?” And you think, “Well, I think it’s blue, but I don’t know if what I think or feel about the sky is right because the other day I heard my parents arguing and I asked Mommy what was wrong and she told me that nothing was wrong, everything was just fine... but it didn’t feel fine to me, it felt like my parents were really angry, like something wasn’t right with them... but Mommy who is the expert about life said everything was “OK”... so something must be wrong with the way I think or perceive things... so maybe the sky is really purple or green... Ahhhh I don’t know what to say, I don’t know what to do... I think it is blue, but I am not sure if that really is the right answer, or if it is the answer they want...

“I just wish I knew what they wanted me to say.”

This thought process is the beginning of you disconnecting from your inner voice, your Divine Wisdom. This is where you get lost. When you are unable to say your Truth, or live from Source Energy, you will inevitably notice some emotional and/or physical discomfort which typically manifests as anxiety, depression, sadness, anger, nausea, exhaustion, sleeplessness, chronic headaches, joint pain, or intestinal distress. In order to calm down those feelings you may have learned to turn to things outside of yourself for comfort like food, drugs, alcohol, people pleasing, shopping, or compulsive work.

Well, it’s time for you to come home to Yourself!!

Before you can change a behavior you have to be aware that it exists.

Below I have listed signs of "disconnection."

Indications of Disconnection from Your Authentic Self

* You worry about what other people think of you.

* You over/under eat, smoke, drink a little too much, or depend on prescription medications more than you would like to get through a day.

* You are always the peace maker.

* You find it difficult to say “no” to people or set boundaries.

* You are the “life of the party” to your family and friends, but secretly feel stressed and depressed.

* You seemingly “have it all” but still feel an uncomfortable emptiness, like something is just missing from your life.

* You feel disappointed with the way your life has turned out so far.

* You are regretful about things that happened in your past.

* You are afraid to make changes in your life.

* You feel responsible for the happiness of others.

* You spend most of your day tending to the needs of others.

* Your days are so busy that you find yourself being really forgetful and making silly mistakes.

* Your mood is dependent upon the mood or actions of others.

* You worry a lot.

* You gossip.

* You have an underlying feeling of unworthiness.

* You are in an abusive relationship (you may be the abuser or the abused).

* Your self worth is determined by the “things you have”, the money you make, the number on the scale, the position you hold at your job, or the success of your children or spouse

* You avoid disagreements at all costs... or

* You argue all the time.

* You are uncomfortable with silence.

* You feel like you are always “putting out fires” or living in constant chaos.

* You feel like you are “walking on eggshells” around significant people in your life.

* You are afraid to speak up for yourself.

* You often feel anxious, depressed, angry, or sad.

* You have a low tolerance for or feel very judgmental of people who have opinions or values that differ from yours.

* You feel like you always have to defend or explain yourself.

* You have difficulty accepting compliments.

* It is very difficult for you to look in a mirror, directly into your eyes, and say, “I love you! You are the most important person in the world to me and I am going to take good care of you!’”

____ _______________________________________________________

Notice if there is a time this week when you act from a place of disconnection, when you choose to not listen to your Intuition. Write about the situation, how it turned out, and how it felt to ignore your Inner Voice. Take some time to reflect on how you may have learned to disconnect from your Authentic Self.

Also, notice a specific time this week when you did listen and respond in accordance with your Intuition, when you felt like you were being your True Self.

Write about the situation, how it turned out, and how it felt to “Be Your Truth.”

How was your experience different when you acted from a “place of disconnect”

versus when you acted in accordance with your Inner Wisdom or Truth?

Loveit2012,

If you are truly physically hungry it may serve you well to meet with a bariatric nutritionist who can review your meal plan and make suggestions as to how you might alter it so as to minimize your hunger. If you follow the post surgery eating guidelines and are still physically hungry you may want to have a consult with your surgeon.

However if you find that you are not actually physically hungry, but just feel an "emptiness inside" therein lies emotional hunger. I would encourage you to give yourself the time and space to contemplate the question "What am I truly hungry for?" grounded in the energy of compassion and curiosity. If you make it a point to spend time each day to connect with you inner knowing, you will come to know what it is your heart/soul is truly longing for….i.e. what kind of nurturing you are really craving… and remember to be loving and kind and patient with you…

Of my clients who struggle with compulsive eating those who have a strong desire to live a joyful, healthy, peaceful life are the most successful in moving from living in the insanity of food obsession to the serenity of a healthy relationship with food and weight. This is because a highly respected and well-nourished body is the foundation upon which such a life must be built. When a person who is overweight and/or a compulsive eater desires to feel good physically, emotionally, and spiritually her motivation to make peace with her body and food is multidimensional; it is not simply wanting to see a particular number when she steps on the scale. It ‘carries with it more weight’ (pun intended!). However many people do not understand that what they eat directly affects their every experience. Do You? Take some time to think about how your weight and relationship with food affect the following areas of your life:

Of my clients who struggle with compulsive eating those who have a strong desire to live a joyful, healthy, peaceful life are the most successful in moving from living in the insanity of food obsession to the serenity of a healthy relationship with food and weight. This is because a highly respected and well-nourished body is the foundation upon which such a life must be built. When a person who is overweight and/or a compulsive eater desires to feel good physically, emotionally, and spiritually her motivation to make peace with her body and food is multidimensional; it is not simply wanting to see a particular number when she steps on the scale. It ‘carries with it more weight’ (pun intended!). However many people do not understand that what they eat directly affects their every experience. Do You? Take some time to think about how your weight and relationship with food affect the following areas of your life:

Physical Health: Are you overweight? Do you have heart disease, diabetes, shortness of breath, sleep apnea, decreased energy, or chronic joint pain? Are there other ways that your weight and food consumption affect you physically?

Emotional Health: Do you harshly judge yourself; feel shame, guilt, anger or self-hatred in relation to your weight or what you eat? Do you experience periods of depression because of your inability to control your eating behavior? Do you ever feel anxious if you do not have certain foods available to you?

Finances: How much money do you spend on food that you use for bingeing, overeating, or avoiding uncomfortable feelings? How much money have you spent on diet books, diet supplements, diet foods, consultations with weight loss professionals, and seldom used exercise equipment and gym memberships? Do you miss time at work because of health problems related to how you eat? Do you believe your weight prevents you from getting a promotion or new job? Are there times that you are not as productive at your job because of how you feel (emotionally or physically) in relation to what you did or did not eat?

Relationships: Do you use your weight as an excuse to avoid relationships? Or, conversely, have you ever stayed in an unhealthy relationship because you believed no one else would want someone your size? Are people in your life inconvenienced by your food related emotional or physical problems? When you eat foods that zap your energy or make you feel ill, are you sometimes nasty, short, or cranky with family, friends, or co-workers?

Sexual Experiences: Does your weight physically or emotionally prevent you from having a satisfying sex life?

Mental Clarity: Do you ever feel a bit dull or foggy in the brain because of the quantity or quality of food you eat?

Activities: Does your weight physically or emotionally prevent you from engaging in healthy, fun activities like hiking, bike riding, swimming, dancing, or playing with your children? Are simple activities of daily living like putting on your socks and shoes becoming increasingly difficult? Do you avoid certain social situations because you don’t want to be seen at your current weight or because you are afraid you will overeat?

Time: How much time do you spend thinking about food or weight issues? How old were you when you first thought you had a problem with food or weight? How many years have you been dealing with this? How many precious moments of your life have you lost to your preoccupation with food and weight?

The purpose of answering the preceding questions is to not elicit feelings of self-blame or harsh self-judgment but rather to increase your awareness of how your current weight and eating behaviors may be preventing you from living a normal, productive life. Understanding that what you eat affects your every physical, emotional, and mental experience can serve to increase your motivation to cultivate a healthy relationship with food.

If you are still riding the yo-yo dieting roller coaster you may have an addictive relationship with food.

Addiction, as defined by Merriam-Webster’s Medical Dictionary, is “the persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be physically, psychologically, or socially harmful”. Sound familiar? Studies have shown that compulsive overeating and drug addiction share many of the same biological characteristics. For instance, when people eat large quantities of sugar and fat they develop a tolerance for these substances and need more sugar and fat to satisfy them, much like alcoholics and drug addicts who, over time, require increased amounts of alcohol and drugs to get high. Other research has revealed that many obese people and drug addicts have a lower number of dopamine receptors (the feel good receptors) in their brains which make them more likely to crave things that boost dopamine like sugar, alcohol, cocaine or heroin. Also when some people are suddenly cut off from sugar and certain carbohydrates they experience withdrawal symptoms like anxiety, depression, irritability and strong cravings for the substance from which they are cut off, just like alcoholics and drug addicts do when they are detoxifying from alcohol or drugs.

However; neither acknowledging the depth to which your relationship with food is negatively affecting your life nor understanding the biology of addiction will in and of itself cure your obsession or right your relationship with food.

You may be thinking “Well I know how to eat well and what I need to do to lose weight.” Do you really? The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. How many times have you gone on a diet proclaiming “This is it! I will never again be overweight! My eating behaviors have forever changed!!” only to find yourself starting a new diet the following Monday morning? Three, four, five or more times? Sounds like insanity to me! You may know how to diet and temporarily lose weight, but you have not made the internal psychological and emotional shifts necessary to sustain a healthy relationship with food and permanent weight loss. Moving from the insanity of a food and weight obsessed life to the serenity that a loving and respectful relationship with food affords you requires the willingness to consider a new way of thinking and being in the world.

For many it requires learning to live a spiritual life.

Cultivating a relationship with your Authentic Self, looking at yourself through kind and compassionate eyes, being willing to listen to and act on the guidance you receive from your Inner Knowing, and understanding that your true essence is pure love are all part of nurturing your spiritual self. As you mature spiritually, behaviors that no longer serve you will fall by the way side.

On page 15 of “A Course in Weight Loss” Marianne Williamson writes:

“Spiritual growth is a fascinating process if you allow it to be. It is an inner journey from one insight to another, in which helpful realizations fall into place as you are ready to receive them. Twisted thoughts become untwisted once you see them for what they are. Your journey from blindness to spiritual vision precedes your journey from dysfunctional eating to a healthy and wholesome relationship to food; in fact it is a necessary prerequisite for it. As you understand more deeply the roots of your weakness you lay the foundation for the cultivation of new strengths.”

To be continued.....