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Louisa Latela

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Everything posted by Louisa Latela

  1. Louisa Latela

    NJ (& Others) Nov/Dec 2008 Chat

    Hi everyone, Just wanted to let you know I have 2 spots open in my WLS group for women who are at least 10 months post op. The information is posted below. If you have any questions about the group please do not hesitate to contact me louisa@louisalatela.com 856.429.9799. Have a beautiful day! Louisa WLS Therapy Group For Women Open to female weight loss surgery patients who are at least 10 months post op. For those of you not familiar with group therapy, it is far less social than a support group. We will be seriously focused on personal changes members want to make. Participants will be working together to accomplish their goals and attendance at every meeting is important, not casual. Recovery is hard work and an important part of the process involves prioritizing self-care. This is especially important for bariatric surgery post-ops because so many have spent a lifetime putting themselves and their own health needs last. Long term recovery requires changing that. You and your recovery from morbid obesity must be a top priority. This becomes even more urgent in the second and third year after surgery when the novelty has worn off.. If you find yourself frequently falling into compulsive old patterns, this group can be an excellent resource for challenging those behaviors and avoiding full blown relapse. Dates: 12/9/08, 12/23/08, 1/6/09, 1/20/09, 2/3/09, 2/17/09 Time: 7:00 – 8:15pm Place: 132 East Kings Highway, Suite 105, Haddonfield, N.J. 08033 Fee: $185.00
  2. Louisa Latela

    Overeating

    Hi Littlefroggy, it is really great that you are aware you are overeating and the things that you are doing to sabatage your weight loss success because before you can change a behavior you must first be aware that it exists. one thing you might try is to take a deep breath before you put anything in your mouth. in that moment when you take that breath you can then ask youself if you are physicially hungry and/or if what you are wanting to eat will support your highest good.... how will you feel physically and emotionally about 20 minutes after eating that particular thing.... ask yourself what you would be doing if you weren't thinking about food in this moment, what is it stopping you from being present to in your life? remember this: all feelings are energy in your body... and all feelings eventually pass... you just need to learn to ride the wave of the emotion... not stuff it.... get together a little bag of tricks... so when you are wanting to overeat... besides breathing you could call a friend, journal, go outside for a walk, read a book, do a crossword puzzle, sing a song, say an affirmation, etc.... if after doing all that you are still determined to eat...well then put whatever it is on a silver platter and eat slowly with passion and presence! be kind and gentle to yourself. joining a support group may also help. it can be a great place for you to process some uncomfortable emotions instead of stuffing them. and think about this: never give up what you want the most for what you want this moment!! all the best, louisa latela
  3. I'd love to attend and/or help out in any way if my schedule permits as I do live in New Jersey! Louisa Latela
  4. Louisa Latela

    What Motivates You?

    Do you follow a specific eating plan simply because you want to lose weight? Chances are if this is your only motivation you will experience some difficulty making permanent lifestyle changes that will support long term weight loss. If you’ve ever dieted before to simply lose weight then you may have had the following experience: You stick to a particular meal plan for a few days or even weeks and feel great because you are losing weight pretty easily. You KNOW that this time is IT and vow that you will eat this way the rest of your life!! Then it happens: Your weight loss slows down, you get frustrated which causes you to lose motivation, which then leads to you reverting back to your old ways of eating which in turns makes you regain the weight you’d originally lost and then some. Sound familiar??? Obviously you were not motivated in a way that would help you summon the strength to not give into your compulsion to go back to unhealthy ways of eating when temptation reared its ugly head. Motivation must come from the inside out. The number on the scale cannot be your only driving force to eat well. If you are having difficulty maintaining a healthy eating pattern, I encourage you to put some time aside to be very still and quiet with yourself. Ask yourself on a deeper level why you are having such difficulty. Are there things other than weight loss that would motivate you to eat well? I once worked with a client who was a very successful business woman. She had a career she loved, great friends an adoring husband and 2 wonderful children. The only thing she struggled with was her weight. She went on endless diets throughout the years and would do well for a while until life got too hectic. Then one day her 7 year old daughter asked her who would take care of her if she died. My client didn’t understand why she was asking this question. Then her daughter told her she was worried that something would happen to her because she didn’t think she ate real healthy. When she realized the example she was setting for her daughter in terms of lifestyle, priorities, and stress management strategies everything changed for my client. She made a commitment to living healthy to be a role model for her children. She also recognized the fact that she owed it not only to herself but also to her loved ones to take care of herself. Seeing the number on the scale go down was not enough motivation to keep my client from giving into the temptation to overeat when she was stressed. However being a good role model and setting a healthy example for her children was. She set the intention for her life to live in a way that supported good health and good energy. She also would ask herself throughout the day when she was handling what might be a stressful situation “How would I hope that my daughter would handle a situation like this?” Then when she listened to her answer she would follow through with her own advice. Because we experience our life through our physical bodies how we feed and move our body directly affects how we experience our lives physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I find that when my clients’ actions are motivated by an internal desire to feel good physically, have emotionally healthy relationships with the people in their lives, and have some sort of spiritual connection they begin to make many small but significant lifestyle changes that just happen to have a side effect of weight loss if need be. So I ask you once again: What motivates you? If you have any thoughts or questions regarding this article I’d love to hear from you. Also in response to several requests I will be facilitating a Tele-Class on Saturday 11/29/08 re: food and Feelings: Learning to Make and Break the Connection!. You can participate via your telephone from the comfort of your own home! For more information you can email me at louisa@louisalatela.com , call me at 856.429.9799, or visit my website at www.louisalatela.com and click on the “Tele-Seminars” tab on the left hand side of the home page.
  5. Louisa Latela

    Surgeons in south jersey...?

    I didn't know Dr. Slotman was now doing the lap band. I know many people have used the south Jersey Bariatric Group at Lourdes in Willingboro for lap band. (Dr. Wasser and Dr. Ing). You might want to check them out. I think they have open support group meetings once a month. I've not heard of the others mentioned. Wishing you all the best!
  6. Louisa Latela

    Please Listen

    As my clients work to create physically, emotionally, and spiritually healthy lifestyles they begin to understand how they used food to numb uncomfortable emotions. Part of creating a healthier lifestyle means they must learn to sit with the awkwardness of feeling and at times go out of their comfort zone and express their feelings. For many this is a very new and scary task. A common complaint from clients when describing how they have tried to talk more intimately with their spouses about their fears, vulnerabilities, and frustrations is that they do not feel heard or validated. They report their spouses often respond to such conversations by trying to “fix them” leaving them the impression that their feelings are somehow wrong. It is so important for partners to understand that allowing their spouses to express their emotions in a safe and non judgmental environment is in and of itself very powerful and healing. Many of my clients have found the following poem to be quite helpful in teaching their spouses how to listen: Please Listen When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving me advice You have not done what I asked. When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn’t feel that way You are trampling on my feelings. When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem, You have failed me, strange as that may seem. Listen! All I ask is that you listen. Don’t talk or do - just hear me. Advice is cheap; 20 cents will get you both Dear Abby and Billy Graham in the same newspaper. And I can do for myself; I am not helpless. Maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless. When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself, you contribute to my fear and inadequacy. But when you accept as a simple fact that I feel what I feel, no matter how irrational, Then I can stop trying to convince you and get about this business of understanding what’s behind this irrational feeling. And when that’s clear, the answers are obvious and I don’t need advice. Irrational feelings make sense when we understand what’s behind them. Perhaps that’s why prayer works, sometimes, for some people - because God is mute, and he doesn’t give advice or try to fix things. God just listens and lets you work it out for yourself. So please listen, and just hear me. And if you want to talk, wait a minute for your turn - and I will listen to you. Author Unknown If you have any questions or comments about this post please feel free to contact me at louisa@louisalatela.com , www.louisalatela.com, www.wlslifestyles.com or
  7. Louisa Latela

    Please Listen

    hi cyndi, the first step to changing a behavior is acknowledging it's existence. it is really great that you were aware that you were eating the apple pie in response to anxiety. the next time you become aware that you are wanting to eat to soothe your anxiety think about the possibility of taking 3 deep cleansing breaths before you put anything in your mouth. then ask yourself how you will feel physically, emotionally, and spiritually 30 minutes after you eat that apple pie (or whatever the food of the moment happens to be..) will eating it support what you say you want to create in your life? will the situation that you feel anxious about change because you have eaten it (i.e. will it make you not have to do your presentation in class??)? think about how you will feel tomorrow when you wake up and know that you made a conscious decision to not eat in response to anxiety... ask yourself if there is something else you could do to calm the anxiety ( positive self talk, take a walk, call a friend, journal, listen to music, or just ride the wave of the feeling, (remember all feelings eventually pass)... etc...). if after doing that you still decide to have the apple pie, put it on a silver platter, sit down, eat very slowly, and savor every delicious bite... eat with passion and presence... and know that just because you made the decision to start to eat the piece of pie doesn't mean you can't decide in any moment to stop eating it. as long as you are clear about your intention of no longer wanting to eat in reaponse to uncomfortable emotions, you will find that your awareness will continue to increase, and your will be led to finding new ways of processing your feelings... in the mean time be really kind and gentle with you! all the best, louisa
  8. Louisa Latela

    Simple Ways To Self Nurture

    Ok, so if you are going to maintain a healthy weight you really do need to change your lifestyle. Compassionate Self Nurture needs to become a way of life for you. As I’ve said before I do believe over eating is often an attempt to self nurture. You must put attention to creating new more positive self nurturing behaviors: below are some simple ways to consciously create a living style that is truly reflective of self love and respect: Simple Ways to Self Nurture When you wake up in the morning take a few moments to remember your dreams, meditate, think happy thoughts, set your intention for the day. Consciously nurture each of your senses every: (i.e. listen to a favorite cd, write in your journal, read a page of an inspirational book, moisturize your body with a great smelling lotion, look at/notice special pictures around your house, eat and savor the flavor of a piece of fresh fruit). Before leaving the house do a body scan and release any tension you might be holding in your body. Pay attention to your breathing. Be on time for all appointments. When you are driving in a car listen to a cd of some beautiful music, or an inspirational/motivational speaker, or ride in silence so you can listen to you/your higher power, your inner wisdom, etc. When you are stopped at a traffic light, pay attention to your breathing. Relax any tight muscles in your body and say an affirmation out loud (“I treat myself with love and respect every moment of every day”). Keep a fresh flower or plant on your desk at work, and in your bedroom at home. Throughout the day take a few moments to go outside to breathe in some fresh air to re-center and reconnect. Set boundaries. Acknowledge and Celebrate what you accomplish during the day… no matter how small the task might be (i.e. I returned a phone call, I mailed some letters, I said a nice thing to myself, I said hello to a stranger, etc..) Create a transition ritual for yourself when you arrive home from work to release your work day (change your clothes, take a shower, do some exercise, etc.. ) Don’t rush through meals, even if you have after meal obligations, take the time to be present and enjoy your food. Keep the conversation positive at the dining table: (have everyone tell the best thing that happened to them that day!). Allow yourself to feel. Acknowledge and express gratitude for everything that goes well in your day (i.e. got a good parking spot, kept my word to myself, had a great conversation with a friend, etc.) Create a bedtime pampering ritual (take a bubble bath, spend some time meditating, read a book, write in your gratitude journal, listen to beautiful music, etc..) Sing, Dance, Play! Take an art class. Drink 8 glasses of Water every day. Go outside and notice the miracles and beauty of nature. Get a massage. Paint your nails. Pluck your eyebrows. Go on a weekend retreat. Learn Yoga. Learn to play a musical instrument. Every time you look in the mirror say something loving to yourself. Plant a garden. Paint a room in your house a wild color!! Go to a town you’ve never been to before and window shop. Refute any unloving thoughts. Know that you are perfect in this moment!!! Lift weights. Say a silent prayer for yourself. Say a silent prayer for someone who drives you crazy! Count your blessings. Surround yourself with loving and supportive people. Watch a sunrise or a sunset. Hang inspirational and meaningful pictures in your house and at your work. Keep affirmation and inspirational books around your house and read at least one page every day. Spend some time near water. Learn to say “no”. KEEP YOUR WORD TO YOURSELF!!! Louisa Latela, MSW, LCSW
  9. Reclaiming Your Power Over food = Reclaiming Your Authentic Power By Louisa Latela, MSW, LCSW Isn’t it amazing how a chocolate chip cookie can control our lives? I am not a weight loss surgery patient, but have certainly had my share of struggles with food and other maladaptive coping behaviors. Despite years of schooling in psychology and social work, I continue to astound myself at how many times I choose to act in ways that do not support my highest good. In the last article I wrote: “Food and Feelings: Making the Connection,” many contacted me after having read the article and wanted to know if I was a WLS patient. While I am not, I have come to learn through years of working on myself emotionally, physically, and spiritually, as well as working with my clients, that there is a common thread among all of us who have ever struggled to truly love ourselves. It is that we lose our authentic power when we give something outside of us the power to control how we feel. Authentic power as defined by Gary Zukav, (author of “The Seat of the Soul”) is when the personality is aligned with the soul. When one is living in line with his/her authentic power, they act in ways that support their highest good. They are respectful and loving to themselves as well as to others. They are aware that the only thing that they can control in this life is their actions and are able to consciously choose to live and behave in a way that truly honors who they are. They hear and act on their inner wisdom, their intuition, their higher power, in essence their truth, their soul. Time and again, I work with WLS patients who are 2-3 years post-op and still struggling with their obsessions with food. It is not that they do not know how or what to eat. It is that they feel powerless over the control it still has in their lives. Hours each day are spent agonizing over what they should/should not eat, being angry about what they did eat, being angry about what they want to eat but cannot eat, feeling guilty about the fact that they ate at all, and ultimately feeling like a failure because they are still having to deal with this issue. They are allowing the thought of food to stop them from being present in their lives and it continues to define how they feel about themselves. This is where authentic power is lost. The way to reclaim your power is to be willing to sit with the uncomfortable feelings of not giving in to the urge to eat when you are not physically hungry, or when you are wanting to eat in a way that is not in line with your meal plan. It is as simple as that, and it is as difficult as that. We begin to discover in a deeper way why these compulsive behaviors exist in the first place. It has often been said that we are always operating from a position of fear or love. When we are operating from a position of love, we are connected with our authentic power. We come from a place deep inside that is rooted in knowing that we are perfect in this moment, that it is safe to act in a manner that supports our highest good and that we know how to truly self nurture. When we are acting from a place of fear, we will look to things outside of us to stop whatever emotion we are experiencing. So I guess all this new age mumbo-jumbo sounds good in theory, but how do you put that into practice? The only way I have discovered to do this, is to take a risk, and keep my word to myself. To make a commitment to myself, as I would to someone I loved dearly, to be conscious of my thoughts and actions, and begin to choose to act in ways that support what I say, are my intentions for my life. While morbidly obese persons are often the victims of prejudice and have to deal with things that average weight persons do not, on some level we are all the same. I have never met anyone who does not have some sort of addiction to some degree. It may be an addiction to alcohol, drugs, work, exercise, obsessive thinking, worrying, relationships, shoes, sports, nail biting, cleaning, chaos, gossip, the internet or sex, but we have all created intricately deceiving ways to help us avoid our feelings. We have all kinds of reasons to defend our behaviors, and it all sounds good, but the truth is, the only person we are really deceiving is ourselves. I encourage you to take the risk to experience the feelings of not giving in to the compulsion to eat when you are not physically hungry. You can always go back to the old way of living, just experience it and see what it feels like. You might just like it, then again it might be scary, just notice. When I have a client sitting in front of me struggling to reclaim their lives from compulsive eating, I often get an image of them holding onto a ledge of a mountain, high up in the air. They are “white knuckling it” to hang on, then they take the risk and “let go”. I then have the vision of them falling through darkness, and I actually experience this in my body. I get a nervous sensation and a feeling like my stomach is dropping, and for a moment, I lose my breath. Then all of a sudden I experience a calm, the tension in my body leaves, I am able to breathe, there is light, and I experience a glimpse of what I believe paradise to be, something that is difficult to describe in words. To know this sensation of paradise, I now understand that it comes from the willingness to go through the darkness in order to experience the light. We are faced with decisions every moment of every day. We are always faced with the decisions of what to think, how to feel about what we think and what to do about that feeling. Because of the work that I do and because of my desire to grow emotionally and spiritually, I am very conscious of my thoughts and actions. As I stated earlier, I sometimes astound myself at how many times I do not choose to think or act in a way that supports my highest good. However, I have also noticed that by putting my attention to wanting to live in a way that is loving and respectful to myself and others, I make many more choices that are self-loving than I have in the past. I trust that the number of self-nurturing choices that I make for myself will continue to increase because I have come to realize that keeping my word to myself feels better than eating a cookie or engaging in negative thinking. Knowing all of this and believing it does not mean that it is always easy to “take the high road.” It takes a great deal of constant, conscious effort. However, the more times you are able to not give in to your strongest urges to overeat, the better the chances are that the next time you are faced with a similar choice you will choose the behavior that supports good health. Most importantly, be kind to yourself as you travel down the path of recovery from morbid obesity. Give yourself credit for having had the courage to have weight loss surgery in the first place. Next, although it is not easy, allow yourself to take a hard look at emotional issues that may have contributed to your obesity. It takes time, patience and self-compassion. Every time you are faced with the decision of what and when to eat and consciously make a choice, you are taking responsibility for creating your life experience. Each time you are faced with that choice and choose health, you are reclaiming your authentic power. If you have any questions or comments about this article I would love to hear from you. You can respond below, visit my website at www.louisalatela.com, email me at louisa@louisalatela.com or call me at 856.429.9799 Copyright 2005 DDB Media LLC www.wlslifestyles.com All rights reserved. Used with permission.
  10. Louisa Latela

    Simple Ways To Self Nurture

    glad that you found it helpful!
  11. Louisa Latela

    Reclaiming Your Power Over Food....

    hi tammy, i am so sorry to hear of your husband's passing. i had a cousin in-law commit suicide a few years back and understand just how devastating it can be. now more than ever you need to put attention to truly nurturing you.... please be kind and gentle with you... and know that you and yours will be in my thoughts and prayers. warmest regards, louisa
  12. Louisa Latela

    Reclaiming Your Power Over Food....

    so glad the article resonated with you.... louisa
  13. food and Feelings: The Importance of Making the Connection By: Louisa Latela, MSW,LCSW I had been asked to speak to a Post-Op WLS support group a couple of years ago... around the time that gastric bypass/ weight loss surgery was just starting to become “popular.” As a psychotherapist who has been working with persons struggling with weight issues for more than 17 years, I was astounded when I spoke to this support group and realized that many bariatric patients have never made the connection between food and feelings. The first woman to speak said she had become obsessed with having to be a size 0. She was in a size two and would not buy any type of clothing that was larger than that and was actively trying to get to that 0. She was exercising compulsively. Another woman reported that she was drinking more and acting out sexually. One participant said she “had it all”: great husband, great kids, a job she loved and all the money she could want, yet she had never been so unhappy. She was starting to eat chocolate again. Yet another member said she was so nervous, she did not know what to do with herself. When she got home at night she would be watching TV and get up and walk to the kitchen, open up the refrigerator door, then dose it and go hack to the TV She would do this several times every night. Other people expressed great fear of what life would be like as a thinner person. I started to explain to them that I believe we are all born these perfect little psychic bundles of love. We are who we are in each moment, expressing our truth with freedom and innocence. If we’re happy we laugh, sad we cry, hungry we eat, full we stop. It doesn’t occur to us to not be real about who and what we are and how we feel Then as we age we start to get sometimes very subtle and sometimes very overt messages that who we are is not ok - that it is not safe to express our truth. This can come from getting messages like “big boys don’t cry,” “oh, that doesn’t hurt,” “that was a stupid thing to say,” or maybe you heard your parents arguing and asked your mother what was wrong and she said “nothing is wrong everything is just fine,” and you start to think, “It didn’t feel fine to me. It felt like there was some anger, like something between my parents was really off;” but your mother who to this point you’ve believed tobe the expert about life said everything was ok. Then you start to think, “Something must be wrong with the way I think or perceive things.” You learn to not trust your instincts. Then one day someone comes along and asks, “What color is the sky?” and you think, “Well, I think it is blue, but I don’t know if what I think is right. The last time I cut my finger, it hurt and I cried. I was told that it didn’t hurt that bad, and I shouldn’t cry. I don’t know. Maybe the sky is purple or green.” And when we are unable to express our truth, it creates a great deal of anxiety. Often, families teach children to manage feelings like anxiety with food. When we are focused on food, we learn that we do not have to be present to the current situation, nor do we feel the pain of not being able to trust and/or express ourselves. Food eventually becomes a reliable coping mechanism, a comfort zone that allows us to ignore and disconnect from what is real. Weight loss surgery patients who take the time to understand how and why they became morbidly obese and make the connection between food and feelings may make sturdier lifestyle changes that support long term weight loss. In the past two months I have had four people call my office who were 2-3 years post op. They were all starting to gain their weight back (anywhere from 25-65 pounds) and were desperate to understand why and learn what they could do to change it. None of these people had sought out any psychological counseling either before or after their surgery. They all thought, “It will just work because I won’t be hungry and my stomach can’t handle enough food to make me get fat again.” Unfortunately this was not the case. They had very little insight as to how they were using food to manage the intensity of their emotions. One way to start to understand the role compulsive eating has played in your life, is to be aware of when your thoughts turn to food when you are not physically hungry, and ask yourself; “What would I be doing right now if I wasn’t thinking about food?” It is in these moments that it is very helpful to journal. It doesn’t have to be in a fancy book, it can just be on a piece of scrap paper. The purpose here is to start to make you conscious of when you may be eating for reasons other than physical hunger. Before you can change a behavior you must first become aware of it. Write down anything that comes to mind. Try not to filter what you are writing. If you don’t know what you would be doing or what you are feeling write about what “not knowing” feels like, and ask yourself “what kind of nurturing do I need right now?” I believe that compulsive eating is always an attempt to self nurture and that self love and compassion is the foundation upon which a successful recovery program must be built. People who are in the process of losing weight and attempting to change their lifestyle may be hard on themselves. Any small deviation from their meal plan may be looked at as a failure, triggering feelings of anger, depression and shame. They may be trying hard to cope, but the shame that follows this kind of self talk can intensify the feelings of hopelessness and lead one to give up on oneself entirely. It is in these moments that we all need to tell ourselves the same thing we would tell a child or loved one. Would we tell them they are a failure because they did not follow their meal plan? If we wouldn’t say it to them, then why would we say it to ourselves? It is in these moments that we must be extra kind and compassionate with ourselves. It is a time when we really need to give ourselves an emotional hug, and think about the idea that we are doing the thing that we least want to do (that is eat in a way that does not support good health). That we have done this is an indication that this behavior feels safer than sitting with some uncomfortable feelings. Sometimes we all struggle to love ourselves enough to believe that we are worth the effort of hanging in there with ourselves as we attempt to make behavioral changes that will support us living a healthier life. Know that food is not good or bad, it just manipulates the energy in our bodies. Notice when and what you are eating and ask yourself; “Will this food support good health for me? How will I feel physically about 20 minutes after I am done eating this? How will I feel emotionally?” It has often been said that our lives are a manifestation of our intentions. Think about what that might mean in your life as you observe the way you eat. Is the way that you are eating and self caretaking an indication that your core intention for your life is something like: “It is my intention to have a healthy, joyful, abundant life” or is it something else? Just notice and think about what you would like the intention for your life to be. That to which we put our attention, expands. As I mentioned earlier, it is not uncommon for people to express great fear and concern regarding what will life be like as a thin person. How will I handle attention from the opposite sex? What will I do with all the extra time and energy I will have when I am eating for good health and energy? What will I do without the protection of my excess weight? As people travel down the road to recovery from morbid obesity, they are sometimes surprised to find out that they are not so much afraid of failure, but of success. Uncovering feelings of unworthiness, asking, “Who am I to be successful and — have a big life?” When actually they need to learn to ask the question, “Who am I not to be? What gives me the right to not have a fabulous life?” It isnot uncommon for people touse excess weight as a way of putting distance between themselves and others. When this is the case, one must learn to be assertive and set appropriate boundaries, and at the same time, risk being vulnerable and experience emotional intimacy. It is important to acknowledge and process any of these feelings that might surface, because if ignored, they could trigger intense feelings of depression, a common co-morbidity for bariatric patients, and fear which can sabotage your success. I believe that depression is an energy that is “depressed,” that it is a sign that there is something in one’s psyche or soul that wants to be expressed but has not had such an opportunity. (This is in no way meant to say that people who suffer from clinical depression need not consult with a physician and take meds as directed). When this oft times creative urge or passion tries to surface and it gets stuffed back down, a person often experiences this phenomenon as depression. As a bariatric patient one must start to explore what it is that excites them, what is it that sparks their interest, what triggers feelings of passion and excitement? Allow yourself to follow your passions. Allow yourself to play. Playing is a vitally important “nutrient” for the well being of our mind, body and spirit. It truly nurtures one’s soul. It is important to understand that feelings are just energy in your body. They, like food, are not good or bad or right or wrong. You do not have to react to your feelings. You can breathe into them and just notice them. Eventually you will begin to understand how to change your feelings as you become aware of your core beliefs and self talk. We are taught in this society that we always have to “feel good” and if we begin to feel angry, sad, anxious, etc., we must do something to stop the feeling; but, what is truly healing is to embrace the feeling, and just sit with it. It will eventually soften, and then you can move through it. When you start to truly “listen to yourself;” you will know what actions you must take in order to live a life that supports your highest good. I am writing this article because I feel so passionately about the need to get this information out to the weight loss surgery population to help them understand that surgery is only the first step. Please, if you have had, or are considering having this surgery, be sure to set yourself up with a good aftercare plan that includes individual psychological and nutritional counseling/support, realistic exercise instruction, follow up with a primary care physician familiar with weight loss surgery and group support. Surgery is not a magic cure. There is both emotional and physical work to be done in order to live a life free from compulsive eating. But IT CAN BE DONE!! Copyright 2004 DDB Media LLC www.wlslifestyles.com All rights reserved. Used with permission. If you have any questions or comments about this article or are making the connections between food and feelings I would love to hear from you. You can visit my website at www.louisalatela.com, email me at louisa@louisalatela.com, or call me at 856.429.9799.

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