Dragon64

Recognizing and admitting to the addiction is the first part of tearing down and rebuilding my Rome (or Utopia). Having surpassed three previous addictions, I am surprised I never recognized my own addiction to food. Now I know what to look for.
As of today, I am officially down 30-pounds since starting this journey. It has been stated that gastric sleeve will help to reduce 60 to 72% of your excess weight, so the closer I can get to my "ideal weight" before surgery, the better my chances of reaching it after surgery.

I think you did fine! Rome wasn't built in a day.

From August 2017 to January 2018 I gained 22 pounds. I was meeting with my hematologist, when he recommended that I seek weight loss surgery. For you see, like so many here on the forums, I have edema of the lower legs. I have been meeting with my Hematologist, because he has me on a dose of Xeralto to keep my blood thin. The thinning of the blood over the course of a year will help to inhibit the formation of new clots... but that darned edema of the legs has the doctor concerned for me. He said I need to lose the weight, so I can reduce the edema, so he can take me off the Xeralto. This is when he recommended the weight loss surgery.
Admittedly, I had been researching the surgery option, probably going back to 2012. But during this time, I was doing the research and making the inquiries, and I just could not get it in my head... I scared myself away. It is different now, this time a doctor recommended it to me as the best option for the situation at hand.
Another week or two goes by, and I decide that I am going to lose the weight on my own. First stop was a visit to my family doctor for a wellness visit, I was on top of the world. At this visit, I topped the scales at my highest weight of all time, 325 lbs! The world deflates below me, and in an instant I decided that I am going to seek surgery. I had concluded in an instant, there is no other way for me.

Question; can I document an entire six months as it happens? The only way I can tell the journey is as it happens.
How I got here; Hi! My name is Johnnie, and I am morbidly obese, and I am also a food addict. 27-years ago, I was a dope smokin, cigarette puffin. soon to be alcoholic. This is when god sent me one of his purist angels, we will call her Elizabeth. This angel accepted me for who I was, but loved me for who I am. When my destructive lifestyle began to corrupt her, she gave me an ultimatum; lose the pot, or lose me... I cannot have both. 27-years ago I quit the destructive habit of smoking dope. Elizabeth and I were also married.
Retaining the other two bad habits of smoking and drinking, I had also started to pack on the pounds. My married weight some 27-years ago fluctuated between 195 to 200 lbs. Over thsee years I tried the Atkins diet, which worked initially, but not before the steadily gaining back the weight. Fast forward to 2002, my weight blew up to 260 pounds. This was also the time my doctor started me on my first of many high blood pressure meds. At this time I also wanted to quit smoking, so my doctor prescribed Welbutrin, and within a month I became a non smoker. This about the time that my drinking got worse, and my weight started to soar again. A brief try at Atkins again proved futile, as my metabolism was not as young as it used to be.
At 300 +/- pounds in 2008, I quit drinking and started dieting again; this time it was the 1600 calorie diet with a daily dose of Phentermine. I managed a measly 50lb loss, before reversing direction. I tried Phentermine a couple more times, and even tossed in the 1200 calorie diet. Nevertheless, my weight was now getting out of hand. I have been plagued with plantar faciitus, sore knees, accompanied by a (un-)healthy dose of low self esteem, it became clear, I need help.
2017 arrived, and I decided to change occupations. In April I started a new career as a professional truck driver. I do not need to describe a truckers lifestyle, accept to say, 2017 was not my best year for decision making. July I came off the truck with a kidney stone. It took 2-attempts to get the stone out, but that little bugger came out. Three days after the last kidney stone procedure, was rushed to the emergency room and diagnosed with multiple pulmonary emboli (blood clots). It was deduced that I got deep vein thrombosis from the truck driver life style, producing the clots that nested in my lungs. Weight in July and August was 298.
I should note here, that through all of the years I also suffered from acid reflux, which I treated with baking soda and Water. But the acid reflux became severe about 5-years ago, before I managed to get a grip on it. I have been reflux free for the last 4-years. This was about the time I was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea and put on the CPAP machine.
If you skipped ahead in this story, just know that I suffer like so many here, with many of the issues surrounding those two nasty words; Morbid Obesity.
Elizabeth, has never left my side, she has been my rock, my angel, my best friend for life, even now more than ever! With my background story out of the way, I can begin my journey now...

May 4, 2018 Family Doctor Visit (3 of 6)
Stats:
Weight: 306.4
BMI: 42.7

So, a net loss of 10.2lbs since my last visit to the family doctor. He was quite pleased with the progress. To recap from the last visit; I was concerned that I was not losing any weight. He asked that I get some blood work done to check my thyroid and insulin levels. As it turned out, my insulin levels were elevated, and my doctor started me on Metformin. That same week I started on metformin, I met with my nutritionist, who worked up a diet plan for me... It would seem the combination of the two have been a success!
Just last week I gave away 4-pairs of pants to my mother so she can make a denim quilt, they ranged from size 50 to 54 (men's). I am now wearing size 48 comfortably.
The hardest part of this journey is the 'life style' change that we all must change in order to make this journey work. I can honestly state that I have nixed "head hunger" That feeling you get when your head says you are hungry, but your stomach is mum on the subject... I no longer feed the head beast, that is a huge life style change for me. The next is pushing away when you are satisfied... That takes some getting used to, as I like to eat until my plate is clean!
So going forward, I am starting an exercise routine, a routine I used to follow some 10-years ago; 6-days on and 1-day rest (Saturday-Thursday, off Friday) My favorite exercise video series that I can faithfully do at home is Power 90 from Beach Body. This series incorporates weights, cardio, resistance training and more, 30+/- minutes everyday.
Feeling good here, better than I have felt in many years. My milestone is June 6, which will be my 4th of the required 7 visits to my family physician. The journey continues...

Being perceived by others as weird only means that you are Truly Unique. My high school years were not memorable; did not date, was ridiculed as a "fatty" etc etc. I decided long ago that people just 'sucked' in general. I have since changed my attitude, to basically that I do not care much for what people think anymore, I am who I am... That worked until I realized that "I am who I am" is not what I thought I would become... It was when I started hating myself that the problems really began, and which led me to the state I am in now. If I do not love myself, then who will (?) My wife aside, as she will love me to the end of time, it seemed that no one else much cared for me, and that hurts,,, all the time. So here I am, turning things around. I had to love myself first to make this journey, otherwise I would not care whether I succeeded or not.
Thank you for sharing, it really helps to know that many of us got here on similar journeys, and that we are not traveling alone anymore.

February 28 2018 Stress Test Day
Stats:
Weight: 319
BMI: 44.5
What can I say, stress tests suck! This was much better than my last test in terms of surviving it, but I believe that I good results have been recorded.
Now is a good time to get in the list of prerequisites that my insurance requires. This is a 6-month journey per the insurance. his so that I am given the chance to lose weight while under medical supervision. The following list will be updated with each event recorded:
Colonoscopy - Done!
Blood work - Done!
Stress Test - Done!
1st Visit with Primary Care Physician (six consecutive visits required within 180-days) - March 8
1st Visit with Dietician (three recommended, but only the first visit is required) - April 11
The process continues...

February 23, 2018 Initial Consultation Day
Stats:
Weight: 321lbs
BMI: 44.8
My doctor of choice is Dr Todd Foreman of the Alabama Surgical Associates. Dr Foreman has 15 years experience as a bariatric surgeon. 10-years ago he performed gastric bypass on my mother, and the lap band on my sister. After researching a number of the local surgeons, I selected Dr Foreman, and set my appointment.
The appoint seemed to take for ever, as this visit also doubled as lab day to get the blood work and H-Pylori test done. To prep for the big day I pulled together 28 questions to ask Dr Foreman. Upon his entry into the room, he answered most all of my questions in the first 20-minutes. He is a straight shooter, telling it like it is. I was afraid he was going to try and sell me the surgery, but instead he informed of the surgery, and talked at length about my options. After nearly an hour together, he confirmed a recommendation of the gastric sleeve being the best option for me.
Elizabeth was with me through the whole visit. She is my conscientious objector. At the end of the day, we downloaded our emotions and began our discussion. Much to her dismay, I have decided to proceed with surgery. She stated she will support me all the way, but asked that I please consider her reservations. I agreed, and weekend we had a number of heart to heart conversations, we discussed more in-depth about the journey that lies before us.

From August 2017 to January 2018 I gained 22 pounds. I was meeting with my hematologist, when he recommended that I seek weight loss surgery. For you see, like so many here on the forums, I have edema of the lower legs. I have been meeting with my Hematologist, because he has me on a dose of Xeralto to keep my blood thin. The thinning of the blood over the course of a year will help to inhibit the formation of new clots... but that darned edema of the legs has the doctor concerned for me. He said I need to lose the weight, so I can reduce the edema, so he can take me off the Xeralto. This is when he recommended the weight loss surgery.
Admittedly, I had been researching the surgery option, probably going back to 2012. But during this time, I was doing the research and making the inquiries, and I just could not get it in my head... I scared myself away. It is different now, this time a doctor recommended it to me as the best option for the situation at hand.
Another week or two goes by, and I decide that I am going to lose the weight on my own. First stop was a visit to my family doctor for a wellness visit, I was on top of the world. At this visit, I topped the scales at my highest weight of all time, 325 lbs! The world deflates below me, and in an instant I decided that I am going to seek surgery. I had concluded in an instant, there is no other way for me.

Question; can I document an entire six months as it happens? The only way I can tell the journey is as it happens.
How I got here; Hi! My name is Johnnie, and I am morbidly obese, and I am also a food addict. 27-years ago, I was a dope smokin, cigarette puffin. soon to be alcoholic. This is when god sent me one of his purist angels, we will call her Elizabeth. This angel accepted me for who I was, but loved me for who I am. When my destructive lifestyle began to corrupt her, she gave me an ultimatum; lose the pot, or lose me... I cannot have both. 27-years ago I quit the destructive habit of smoking dope. Elizabeth and I were also married.
Retaining the other two bad habits of smoking and drinking, I had also started to pack on the pounds. My married weight some 27-years ago fluctuated between 195 to 200 lbs. Over thsee years I tried the Atkins diet, which worked initially, but not before the steadily gaining back the weight. Fast forward to 2002, my weight blew up to 260 pounds. This was also the time my doctor started me on my first of many high blood pressure meds. At this time I also wanted to quit smoking, so my doctor prescribed Welbutrin, and within a month I became a non smoker. This about the time that my drinking got worse, and my weight started to soar again. A brief try at Atkins again proved futile, as my metabolism was not as young as it used to be.
At 300 +/- pounds in 2008, I quit drinking and started dieting again; this time it was the 1600 calorie diet with a daily dose of Phentermine. I managed a measly 50lb loss, before reversing direction. I tried Phentermine a couple more times, and even tossed in the 1200 calorie diet. Nevertheless, my weight was now getting out of hand. I have been plagued with plantar faciitus, sore knees, accompanied by a (un-)healthy dose of low self esteem, it became clear, I need help.
2017 arrived, and I decided to change occupations. In April I started a new career as a professional truck driver. I do not need to describe a truckers lifestyle, accept to say, 2017 was not my best year for decision making. July I came off the truck with a kidney stone. It took 2-attempts to get the stone out, but that little bugger came out. Three days after the last kidney stone procedure, was rushed to the emergency room and diagnosed with multiple pulmonary emboli (blood clots). It was deduced that I got deep vein thrombosis from the truck driver life style, producing the clots that nested in my lungs. Weight in July and August was 298.
I should note here, that through all of the years I also suffered from acid reflux, which I treated with baking soda and Water. But the acid reflux became severe about 5-years ago, before I managed to get a grip on it. I have been reflux free for the last 4-years. This was about the time I was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea and put on the CPAP machine.
If you skipped ahead in this story, just know that I suffer like so many here, with many of the issues surrounding those two nasty words; Morbid Obesity.
Elizabeth, has never left my side, she has been my rock, my angel, my best friend for life, even now more than ever! With my background story out of the way, I can begin my journey now...

I have not had any reflux since I started the CPAP machine. I hate being on the machine, but if it keeps the reflux demons away, then I am good with it. I've elected to not stress over the possibility of reflux coming back after the sleeve operation, but I do plan to work closely with my doctor, if he feels that I am at too high of a risk, then we can begin discussions of gastric bypass as an alternative.

That is exactly how I look at my new sleeve too. I could do the hard yards to lose quite a lot of weight on my own, even suffering through hunger, but the sleeve is the tool I need to be able to lose half my bodyweight without hunger/hormonal changes from long term caloric restriction setting in motion the usual arsenal of weight regain processes, and to give me a really solid shot at maintaining such extensive weight loss in the long term.

Are you still taking medication for reflux? Is there a reason your doctor is recommending sleeve rather than bypass if you have reflux and high blood sugars? From some discussions I've read over in the sleevers forum, most surgeons expect people with GERD to get it even worse is they opt for the sleeve, whereas bypass tends to resolve GERD (and also recommend bypass for diabetes if that is what your blood sugar issues are linked to?).
I'm sorry your partner still feels that the surgery is not a good idea, but super glad that she will still support you through it. I think overcoming your other addictions is fantastic, and could signify your capacity to will yourself into better eating behaviours too, but I don't think it translates as well into capacity to generate and maintain significant enough weight loss. I have improved so many behaviours over the past decade of EXPLICITLY NOT dieting, and those changed behaviours contributed to better physical and mental health, but they still did/would not make me slim, because on their own they weren't enough to undo the metabolic damage my body has sustained after years of remaining morbidly obese while trying to diet, following early years of depression and disordered eating. Diets fail 98% of the time because we need additional tools to make it work long term.

Minor Update to my Weight Loss Journey:
I met with my Hematologist today; this is the doctor who first recommended that I seek weight loss surgery. He gave me high praise for my continued success, because according to his records (& scale), I have lost 22lbs since our January appointment. I have actually lost 17lbs since January, but his assessment sounds much better
I explained to him what has changed, and what I still have left to achieve, and that was pretty much it. He wants to see me again in August, to hopefully pull me off of the blood thinner, Xeralto.

Thank you frustr8, the comments are appreciated.
So a bit of a vent; my lab work, which is usually covered by insurance, cost me $32 today. Note here, this is not the lab work that is required for weight loss surgery, no, this is the lab work that my family doctor wanted to have done to check my sugar and thyroid. I cannot wait to get healthier so I can stop paying all of my new doctor friends...

I'm much better today And still on track. My doctors office called to remind me of my April 6th weigh-in appointment.

Thanks all, I am really looking forward the time when I can say "finally"

A couple days ago I was searching for silverware to use as a bariatric patient. There is some cool stuff coming out of England, but it was kind of pricey to get across the 'big pond', but Amazon had these Bariatric/toddler training untensils. I just got them in today, what do you think:




$14 and some change shipped, you get two sets and two carry pouches. They seem well made... and smaller than you think. These are supposed to help with slowing down your eating, and of course eating smaller portions. I will test them out from here on out... probably give them a rest when I start the liquid diet...

My nutritionist gave me a large packet of very useful information, most of it had to do specifically with what to expect before and after surgery, and to to maintain a new and healthier life-style. But it was the lists that are helping me make the life-style changes that I have taken whole heartedly. I would like to share these with, in hopes that they can help you in the way they are helping me. Here is how it was explained to me; from the first list of 20 options choose 2 modifiers and start employing them into you life. Then, when you see your doctor in a month, choose two more. Don't just choose them, but add them to the previous months modifiers. Repeat this month after month. I call these modifiers, as that is essentially what you are doing, modifying what and how you eat.
here is the first list:
1. Do not skip breakfast - eat three distinct meals per day. Avoid grazing.
2. Decrease portion sizes and stop eating when you are no longer hungry vs. when you are full/satisfied.
3. Limit eating out to once/twice per week; make better choices when eating out; ask questions about how the food is prepared. This might mean you cook more at home and meal prep.
4. Increase fruits and vegetables by including one or both at each meal.
5. Reduce desserts/candy/sweets to one time per week.
6. Reduce grab-n-go processed foods such as granola bars, chips, frozen meals, PB crackers etc.
7. Prepare meals with a half-plate portion of non-starchy veggie, a palm-sized portion of lean protein, and 1/3 - 1/2 cup of healthy carbs.
8. Avoid fried foods and begin choosing leaner meats (Leaner meats include the word round or loin such as sirloin, top rounds etc.)
9. Begin some sort of activity every day even if just for 5 minutes (walking, swimming, exercise videos etc) Reduce time sitting.
10. Decrease caffeinated, sweetened, and/or carbonated beverages with the goal of eliminating.
11. Start gradually increasing your Water intake until you are up to at least 64oz per day.
12. Reduce alcohol with the goal of eliminating.
13. Begin a multivitamin daily (after surgery, you will switch to a quality bariatric vitamin).
14. Begin calcium citrate with Vitamin D 500mg twice daily.
15. Practice taking bites the size the size of a thumbnail, eating more slowly, chewing more.
16. Practice SIPPING beverages---no longer "chugging" or gulping.
17. Practice NO liquids 30 MIN. BEFORE/DURING AND 30 MIN. AFTER MEALS.
18. Practice positive self-talk; weight loss isn't easy, so be nice to yourself!
19. Begin to reduce use of straws and gum.
20. Track calorie intake.

The first month I chose #7 and #18. This month I chose #9 and #20
I hope this will be of some use to you who are just getting started, and to those of you already on the losers bench...

A "think" to brighten your day. You will always,be Johnnie, and th at is totally fine, wouldnt' t have it any other way. As you exercise, you are going to get stronger, a little more firmed-for a healthier you, you're still,hoping to be our Dragon64 but your tail isn't going to be dragin' (dragon) 🐊anymore! Pretty doggone good, I'm thinking!😛🚩😛

For me, it took me years of yo-yo dieting or getting to a set-point and then not being able to lose without doing an unsustainable alternate day fast with calorie restriction. And the best thing I found when researching for WLS was Dr. Weiner's theory of WLS moving our set-point. So I chose to go ahead with it. Cuz I am a compliant person diet-wise. I can lose weight to a point! But I can NOT maintain. At about month 3, my body starts fighting back.
So I look at my RNY as a surgical tool to alter my set-point and also as a maintenance tool. I still have to do the heavy lifting to lose weight and exercise.
Can't wait to watch your journey, dude!!!

Well, I have been on multiple diets, the most damaging of which was the starvation diet (no Breakfast or lunch, with huge supper). My metabolism rebelled against me so hard... it took months to get turned around, and yes, I gained back all the weight plus some on that self imposed diet. I'm working smarter this time, as I have a team of weight loss professionals on my side, surgery or no surgery, this is happening. I am very happy to share this with you all, cause going it alone just plain sux!

May 9, 2018 Update:
I have mentioned some lists that I have been working from in the last month or so, lists that I received from my nutritionist. These lists, the behavioral list and the how to eat list, have been very beneficial to me on my journey. I will try to post the lists in another posting, as they benefit someone else just starting out.
The deal is, from the how to eat list, I would select 2 changes (from 20), and from the behavioral mod list, I would select 1 (from 13). Then every time I visit my family doctor for a monthly weigh-in, I get to add 2-more and 1-more from each of the lists. Note here, you are not swapping out last months changes with this months changes... No, you are actually adding these new changes, in hopes of developing the life-style changes that we need in order to be successful with our surgery.
This month I added in exercise from the list of 13, and using the My Fitness Pal app from the list of 20... more on this later when I post the lists. So I started exercising just this past Saturday, the day after my 3rd visit to my family doctor. It is a simple workout from the Power 90 series of videos put out by Beach Body. There are plenty of other options, but the exercise guru, Tony Horton, has some charisma, so I stick with him... My "man-crush" so to speak. So I start this on Saturday, and I gotta say, that I noticed a scale victory right off. I am losing a pound everytime I exercise. No crap, I weigh before I exercise, and then after, and I have lost a pound... Too bad I am maintaining at the moment (301 to 302 etc etc)
I should mention here, that losing as much weight as possible prior to surgery was aggressively stressed to me by my surgeon. Dr Foreman stated that the more weight I can lose before surgery, the easier it will be to get to my goal weight... and my nutritionist stated I could also have a shorter pre-liquid diet (or no pre-liquid) if I can get as low as possible.
...and I have an admission to make here; My wife, who is my corner stone, my life and my god-send angel, has expressed that she does not want me to have surgery. She will support my decision to have surgery, and will be by my side through out no matter what. But she has issued me a challenge; that if I can get my weight down to the point that my BMI drops below insurance acceptance level of 35, that I will cancel the surgery and continue on my new life and course. As stated early on, I have been able to quit smoking pot, cigarettes, and I managed to quit drinking. She believes I have it in me to succeed at this endeavor as well. So what have I got to lose? By September 4 of this year I will either be canceling my surgery, having met my wife's challenge, or will be receiving my surgery date... both paths lead to a healthier me, and shame on me if I do not try!
No doctor updates until June 6, so more when I know more... maybe when I drop below 300, as that would be huge for me at this stage of my life!

Well, I have been on multiple diets, the most damaging of which was the starvation diet (no Breakfast or lunch, with huge supper). My metabolism rebelled against me so hard... it took months to get turned around, and yes, I gained back all the weight plus some on that self imposed diet. I'm working smarter this time, as I have a team of weight loss professionals on my side, surgery or no surgery, this is happening. I am very happy to share this with you all, cause going it alone just plain sux!

I wish you much success. If you haven't trashed your metabolism with a million prior weight-loss attempts, you have a really good chance of accomplishing this without surgery. Kudos to you if you can! We can't wait to hear your next update!

I'm just so tired of being unhealthy... I don't want to live forever, but I am striving to live longer. Thank you for the kind words!!