I completely understand and felt the same way. Everyone kept asking me if I was excited and I wasn't really. But I knew I was making the right decision. My girls are 7 and 2 and the oldest is excited to have a mommy who can do more with her and be more active. I had my VSG on January 3 and already I feel better already. Very little pain, cooking for my family by the 5th and I couldn't be happier with the decision. You're giving your kids a better future with you and I wish you all the best tomorrow.
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I think the point of the liquid diet is to prepare you mentally for what's to come.
Right now, you can cheat a little and nothing horrible will happen (unless you don't shrink your liver and your doctor decides not to do your surgery....it's happened)
But here's the problem....
Immediately after surgery, you have about two to three days where you don't ingest ANY calories...just clear fluids. Then, you're on shakes and clear liquid for TWO MORE WEEKS. You'll get like 400 calories a day if you're lucky.
And If you screw up and eat something AFTER surgery? You can really hurt yourself and end up needing emergency surgery for whatever you get stuck. My doctor did a talk about all the horror stories of his career....the stupid things people ate and the trouble they got into. Not good. AVOID THIS.
You're just getting started. For me, it was the post surgical period where I nearly gnawed my own arm off. LOL
But yeah...that MONTH of freakin starvation just sucked. It really did. Honestly....it was much harder (in my opinion) than the actual surgery.
But the good news...is that you will survive it. And you'll drop quite a few pounds to soothe your misery.
And you'll be eating yogurt and cream of wheat before you know it.
I was on the liquid diet for Thanksgiving and cooked for my family. OMG...so hard!
For Christmas, though...I get to eat finely cut up turkey and mashed potatoes. And it sounds like heaven.
You all have my sympathies. Stay strong!