Asil61

6 minutes ago, OutsideMatchInside said:

I have a friend that lost weight without WLS and she taught me some tricks about how to eat very little on dates and not attract a lot of attention. If you are dating and eating out all the time, you can easily gain weight, especially a woman that has a normal stomach so you have to learn how to eat without really eating too much.

I feel like men accept that you are not able to eat all your food when you order a lot of food. I order normal Entrees.

You just draw attention to the fact that you are not eating much by not ordering much. When you are eating very little and other people are pigging out, that makes them nervous and self conscious.

Salads with Protein are the best because you can eat all the Protein some of the salad greens push it all around and they don't care. They don't want to eat salad either.

Split an appetizer with them, tell them you just wanted a taste and a big strong guy like them needs it more than you

I don't drink or smoke. I also look 10 to 12 years younger than I am. I claim my youthful looks are because I don't drink, smoke and I eat well. Really it is just genetics but they don't know my mom is in her 60s with no wrinkles.

Talking a lot and being engaging, they won't notice you aren't eating if you are flirting hard enough and have some good stories to tell.

You have to have a plan of attack before a date so you aren't caught off guard.

Also I think this is probably a hard sell for you, considering the area of the country you live in. Everyone on the coasts, or in other major metros are doing some kind of special diet, so most people don't bat an eye when you tell them you are low carbing.

Another thing to think about is, try to pick men that are into fitness. They are not going to expect a woman of a certain age to be a glutton. I go for the outdoors active types. The swimmers, hikers, cyclists, Water sports.

good advice, I will have to remember that

2 hours ago, sgc said:

I wouldn't necessarily say that is shallow. If a guy asks you out for dinner and you don't eat, it may come off as you being uninterested.

:/

4 hours ago, Travelher said:

Same here. That's why activity dates were reserved for second or more dates. I'm with you on that..it is very awkward to have to sit though a date that is going nowhere. That is why I kept them coffee or after work drinks. Easy out to say i have to get back to work for a meeting or have dinner plans gotta go!

You just need to keep at it. You will find someone you mutually click with. I find it is a bit of a numbers thing. It isn't you. Dating is hard. But you'll get into the swing. I ended up blogging about it. At the end of the day you wanted it to be a total disaster (great story) or preferably great (because that's why you are doing it).

well, glad to know it's not me...lol A coffee date would be good for me, love coffee also I would not be feeling like I need to force food in me. I am not a one night stand by no means, so if they even mention going back to their place it's out of the question. and no more talking to them. Not looking for that kind of relationship.

4 hours ago, OutsideMatchInside said:

@Asil61

Do you like seafood?

Mexican is a bad choice for a variety of reasons, mainly beacuse it is something that people volume eat. Most plates come with 3 to 4 tacos, so eating one stands out.

If you have to get Mexican, why not get Fajitas or Quesadilla? You say you low carb, lots of people low carb now, and just eat the meat and veggies. I do this a lot especially if I go to a sports bar or something and there are limited options on the menu. Just eating the filling from a Quesadilla is not that filling and if you say you low carb before hand, you don't raise eyebrows.

I do like seafood, But not alot of seafood places around here. I order the taco because I know I will not be able to eat it all.. Still half of a sandwich fills me up. So am still unable to eat much without getting full.

4 hours ago, Travelher said:

Are these first dates? When I was dating I NEVER did a meal for a first date. Dating 101... no more than a coffee date for a first date. If you aren't clicking the last thing you want to do is be stuck for an hour or more with the person. Activity dates are good as well, but I'd reserve for second dates. Don't think my husband and I went out for a meal until date 3 or 4 and he was too into me and the conversation to notice what I was or wasn't eating

Yes first dates. never make it to a second one...lol. I like to see if there is any connection before going to more of a activity date. Why put yourself with someone you are going to feel uncomfortable with all day long...maybe its me, been out of the dating seen for a very long time.

13 hours ago, jlindenman said:

You are so correct. That to me is a sign of a very shallow person. This surgery is a difficult adventure as it is without negative people like that. I usually don't even get to telling them about my surgery because I have to tell them that I am also disabled. I an sorry this is happening to you. You are an extremely beautiful woman inside and out. I hope things change for the better. It will. I'm sure.

john

thank you John, I usually chose mexican, cause I can order one taco and it hard for me to finish that off. I hate orderer a lot of food and not eat it. What can I say, I am a cheap date...lol

Congratulations. I know you are going to do awesome! Keep us updated

It seems in the past two years that I have gone out with about 6 guys. All of them seem a little weird out that I do not eat that much in front of them. I hate to order a big meal, so I don't. And of course, I do not drink another thing they seem to think is weird. Does anyone else have this problem? I usually get through one date and never asked out again. :/