TexasRose

I drink wine and cocktails within moderation. Tend to get tipsy faster b/c of low calorie intake. But when I am too tight to eat, having a glass of wine helps to relax me and I find that I can tolerate food a little better. Just make your best judgement and count the calories in to your total intake.

So, I went on this first date last night....not EXACTLY my type but really nice with fun potential. Dinner = good. Conversation = good. Drive home convo = good. Pulled up to my parking garage and he yanked out the 'I'm not feeling really well' line and 'let's definitely do this again' and a handshake....A HANDSHAKE?!?!? Granted - he coughed on the way to dinner and said that he had not been feeling well...but seemed to be fine otherwise. I ended up home fairly early with a HUGE sinking feeling of disappointment. To this point - no follow up IM, email, txt or phone call. Guess he is just not that in to me. I love the 'getting excited' part of new dates - but the 'crushed' part really sucks! But seriously...WHERE is Mr. Right and how many more excited/disappointed evenings must I go through to get to something even remotely resembling a relationship?

I want to have an estate quality portrait made in an amazing ballgown....

Thanks everyone! I'm 35 and living in Houston - so we have plenty of moisture. This did start before the winter - so I do not know if it is necessarily tied to the switch in seasons. I tend more to the dry side but never this extreme. I've asked about rosacea and have been told that I do not have it. Has anyone heard that their band seems to draw moisture to it? Someone said that to me and it made me think that perhaps it is sucking it away from my skin. Derbygirl - I'm there with you - NOT giving up the showers!!! Jachut - I did lose a lot of hair about 4 months out from my surgery - have about half of what I did before. Luckily it has not thinned at the ends but some of the grow back is grey *EEK!!* - thank god for a good colorist!!! Try the Mane & Tail shampoo, conditioner and body moisturizer - it's great to strengthen your hair shaft...I have very long hair and it does not break! I eat a lot of sushi & fish - so my Omega-3s are decent - but maybe I am lower in other things. Anyway - thanks everyone!!

So, I'm almost 17 months out and the skin on my face is extremely dry *sometimes flaky* and breaks out in an itchy rash, at times. Lately the rash is under my jawline and the breakouts are on my face. It has become progressively worse starting at about a year out from surgery. I had an initial reaction to the antibotics used during surgery *hyper-sensitive* and broke out in a hives-like itchy rash 2 days post-surgery. It would come back off and on for the first year out...but would go away. NOW, no matter what I do, I cannot seem to get my skin to calm down. I drink a lot of Water. I moisturize day and night. I do not use harsh products on my face through my cleaning routine. I have ultra-hydrating sensitive skin facials. I have not been to the dermatologist yet - but I am thinking that is the next move. The rest of my skin on my body seems to be doing fine - just my face that is having the issues. Luckily, makeup works wonders but the itching is driving me nuts! Is anyone else having this issue? Recommendations?

Marissa - When I did Optifast about 16 years ago, it was doctor supervised with only their powder based shakes. The system may have changed since then but it was a very difficult 2 weeks of my life because of the calorie reduction. It was also quite expensive. Just ask around here about different people's liquid stages to get ideas of what to eat during that time period. It might be just as easy to obtain a Protein shake that you like and do it on your own. Best of luck!

Stress is pretty much a constant in my life because I own a consulting business and my clients are extremely demanding....long hours, complex problems, travel, etc. Then you add things like weightloss, family, friends, social life....adds up quickly. When I am extremely stressed out my band feels super tight and high in my throat. Additionally, if I ever get upset or cry, my band seems to tighten down instantly. Best remedy I have found is to try to calm myself and then follow up with a hot drink to start relaxing the muscles. It's all just a part of learning how to have this band as part of your everyday life. Do not be afraid of it - you will learn along the way what is the best solution for you. )

Are you eating enough calories? For me, when I stay below my required calorie intake for too long, I plateau. I have used this website tool: http://www.freedieting.com/tools/calorie_calculator.htm to calculate my BMR. Then subtracted 1000 calories per day from my maintenance calorie requirement....so, removing 7000 calories per week should equate to a 2 lbs loss per week. Increasing the exercise can help with toning up and building muscle. Might want to check your inches lost to see if you have made any strides there. Maybe increase your Protein intake and lower your carbs. I also try 2 liquid meals and one solid meal per day (at lunch) for a while and that will get me back on a losing streak. It will happen - you just have to fight your way through it. Great job on your initial 29% loss!!!

Try this: http://www.freedieting.com/tools/calorie_calculator.htm For every pound you want to eliminate, subtract 500 calories per day from your Maintenance calories per day. So, if you want to lose 2 lbs per week, take 1000 calories per day from your Maintenance calories per day. Use the zig-zag method where you vary your calories so that your body does not adjust to getting 1000 calories every day - consistently. When your body becomes accustomed to your calorie habit, that is when it plateaus. Keep it guessing. Best of luck!!

So...we know after time that we become comfortable in our relationships...whether married, dating, etc....and perhaps might not do as much to keep the spark going. Not our fault, just natural progression. Some people say that to keep someone interested in "the chase" - to ignore, taunt, act disinterested, etc. What are some of your ideas? What have you done successfully to keep the interest of the opposite sex? Has it changed pre-band vs. post-band?

) Turner24 - Hope that it helps!!!

http://www.freedieting.com/tools/calorie_calculator.htm Subtract 500 calories per day from your maintenance caloric intake for each pound you want to lose per week. Use the Zig-Zag method of fluctuating your calories to ensure that you do not plateau. This has really helped me.

Chrispy - Oh the stories I could tell from the dating experiences!!! Let's just say that it is a pleasant surprise to find guys that look like or better than their photos....because it is an awkward situation when you do not even recognize them when they look SOOOOO much worse than their photos! *LOL* ~T~

Susan - you did a 5K...that is AMAZING! Way to go! How did you build up to be able to run that? Did you follow some sort of running schedule? I would LOVE to run but I have twisted hips and it hurts. I can walk about 4.5 - 5.0mph on the treadmill but the jogging only lasts about a minute until I am sucking wind and in pain.

I have been doing the dating thing on Match and eHarmony for the past year. Have met some really great guys and have needed to weed through a lot of questionable ones. I'm currently hooked on one but it will be a very long distance thing for another 9 months when he returns to Texas...so there really cannot be much of a commitment from his side. There is also absolutely no guarantee that when he comes home that it will be an exclusive relationship or that he will remain interested in me. The question: Do I continue to have my profile up on the dating sites and date if anyone interesting comes along or wait around to see what happens when he returns?

So, I've 'met' this guy through an online dating service who is from my State but working out of the country for the next 9 months. We have not met face-to-face but he will be home for a 3 week holiday in a few days. We have not solidified plans to meet but have hinted to the opportunity. I'm sure it will happen - but after my dating experiences over the last 9 months, I'm not holding my breath!! Here's the deal - he mentioned that his last girlfriend had gained some weight and it frustrated him that she would not do anything about it. I have shared MANY photos from the last 5 months and I have repeatedly said that I was not thin but working on it. Part of me just wants to tell him about the surgery so that I can say - yes, I have a weight problem but I DID something about it and it is a process that I am about half way through. -OR- Do I wait for him to see me in person and let him make judgment without explanation? I'm really struggling with this decision. I do not have a problem telling anyone about the band and I usually do tell my dates after they meet me in person. Thoughts?

Here is a great site with all of the Boar's Head deli meats and their nutritional values. May I highly recommend the Blazing Buffalo chicken breast....2 oz = 13 g Protein with < 1g fat!! http://www.boarshead.com/BHNutritionGuide.pdf

Isn't it amazing how we whip up these really great fantasies about the dating men that we have met online and rarely does reality = fantasy. I'm sure guys do the same thing. With this particular gentleman, we have talked a lot through email and the phone - but until he reveals his true self...I will have doubts. APinkSoprano - I completely agree with you...I cannot wait to get out of this vicious dating cycle and in to something solid and future focused. What happened to dating 'just for fun'? I've really tried to just have fun and meet guys....but the little 'think about your future' thoughts creep in and ruins the whole thing of just doing it for fun! tick, tick, tick.... eh, who wants kids anyway! I cannot imagine that I'm too horrible as a potential date...I've had over 700 hits on my profile in the last 3 weeks. It's just the process of weeding through the numbers I guess.

Ladies, Thank you for your thoughts. I never thought tell vs. don't tell decision would be this difficult - but it seems to be with this particular guy. What's bugging me is the desire to say "HEY - I DID SOMETHING ABOUT THIS" so that it shows that I'm not like the ex-g. *shrug* Perhaps this is just wasted brain power. You guys are so great! Thanks!

Chrispy - I hate New Years too....going to a party as a single with all of my couple friends...and sometimes single friends too...midnight...few hugs but then just watching everyone else have that midnight kiss and feeling rather desperate. I'm out there, meeting/greeting, being social, looking fabulous....just cannot solidify the relationship for the New Year's date. Why does that DAMN KISS mean SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much?!?!?! Tiff

So, I was stretching out after exercising the other night....I was laying on my back with my feet over my head and my hands stretched up....then rolled back all on the floor to my original position. I then curled my legs up to twist to the side. When I twisted to my left, my port popped up from between my ribs and was pushing up against my skin. Looked like that scene from Aliens when the alien was coming out of the guy's stomach....ANYWAY, FREAKED ME OUT! When I went back in to my original position, my port went back in to place. It did not hurt but I really do not think that it should be able to do that. I have not had any residual pain and have not been able to duplicate the incident. I have not called my surgeon's office - thought I would ask here first. Has anyone else had this happen to them? Isn't the port stitched to our abdominal wall? Strange!

Barium does that to me too....usually lasts about 24 hours.

My first self-imposed diet was at age 7 which was a result of my step-grandmother calling and asking if I was 'still fat'? I was one of those kids that would bulk up and then shoot up in height…but she did not understand – she wanted a thin granddaughter. I was always tall for my age, big boned - but did not over eat until after the dieting started. I look back on the different situations where I hoarded food and still feel guilt because I could/can hear my step-grandmother's voice in the back of my head saying 'fat' with every food choice that I made. I did Weight Watchers, Herbalife, Jenny Craig, pre-measured food, strong diet pills, supervised dr. diets, MediFast, self-imposed starvation, etc. Nothing worked for the long haul. As a teenager, the only time I felt accepted was when I was on a thin trend. I placed a lot of unnecessary value in the size of clothing that I was wearing and how popular I was with my peers. I over-extended myself academically, sports, modeling, dance, theatre, student leadership, music, etc to the point that I had mono for 4 months when I was 17. Whatever metabolism I had remaining after yo-yo dieting for all of those years was completely wiped out from that illness.<O:p Pre-banding, I would beg my doctors to put me on diet pills to help with the cravings b/c with them - I felt in control which made me feel 'better'. I'm not recommending this path for your daughter...pre-measured foods is not always the answer...because it becomes boring after a while and that is the worst to face every day. I was told to climb stairs instead of taking the elevator, to not eat so much and exercise. When you are in complete despair and being controlled by cravings – advice like that does not help.<O:p I disagree with the 'clear it all out' theory....deprivation results in hoarding and sneaking of food....which exacerbates the problem. We need to be able to live around that type of food and make the conscious choice to partake or not. Sure - it's easy to remove everything and say that it will not pass the doorstep again....but it is not reality of how to actually deal with the food. In fact, now - if I do not have chocolate in the house, I panic and obsess over it....but if it is here, I'm fine and I do not eat it all that often. <O:p Through this banding journey - I discovered a website (http://www.freedieting.com/tools/calorie_calculator.htm) that has really helped me understand the calorie in/calorie out theory and zig-zag dieting that I wish I would have understood a long time ago....before all of the yo-yo dieting and the suffering with the resulting depression from failure. Taking control of the calories and understanding what is honestly passing in to your mouth is what the band has taught me. You have to eat to keep your metabolism up and stay active…and starving is not the answer that I so often turned to when I needed control.<O:p I very much feel for you and your daughter. For me, it took getting REALLY mad at me, my body and my fat to no longer want to allow it to rule my life. It is a very personal journey with many underlying currents that might influence feelings and actions. I do not know if anything I said above helps – but it is my story that lead to where I am today. I hope that she does not have the lifelong struggle that I did but it is her path that she must discover.<O:p I wish you both the very best to find the journey that will lead your daughter to peace with her weight.

So, I'm considering starting private therapy to help work on my 'body image' issues. When I look in the mirror - I see myself at my highest weight and cannot visualize *despite looking at tons of before/after pictures* what everyone else says that they see when they look at me. Logically, I know that I am thinner by clothing size, numbers on the scale, agility, etc - but it is getting my brain to catch up with my body. If you do not mind sharing - have you sought this type of help? What advice/exercises did they give you to start working through it? Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated!!

Cheese is a decent source of protein - especially when you cannot get anything else down! It became my saving grace when other things would not work. So, don't cut it out completely...as everyone else said, enjoy in moderation! Cheers!