brandyII

I'm happy for your. It's something that a lot of people don't realize that boys have just as many of those issues as girls do these days. My daughter will be 20 next month and is doing a lot better and now that she's had the gastric bypass I'm hoping she'll do well but I still worry and worry about replacing food with alcohol still, in the back of my mind. Anyway it's good to talk about and actually brought out some of those old tears talking to you about her time in the psych hospital. And now someone just started a thread on adult children of alcoholic parents and now I have another fun one to share in, take care Nancy!

I guess I never liked OA or alanon or any of those groups, I found them to be more depressing. I guess it doesn't work for everyone. Some people are just the type of people who can get sucked in to the abyss and others can brush it off like it's not even happening. I'm a sucked in type person so now that my father has passed I'm doing a lot better, not perfect but it helps!!

Well I was about your age when my dad first had to go to detox, actually he still worked then and they made him. There are five kids in my family and most were extremely angry at him. We did an intervention once and that was the craziest thing ever, no professional, just 5 very angry children and one alcoholic confused and laughing parent. I hope you don't have to deal with them on your own even though I know how family dynamics can be and you could have 10 brothers and sisters and still being the only one dealing with them. So good luck and if you ever need to get it out and share I'm always here, take care brandyII.

Tommaney, Good thread cuts to the core, my father started detox facilities in 1986 after his father died and I can't count how many programs we put him in between then and 2006 when he died. Good luck to you I know how hard it is and can't imagine how it must be to have both parents alcoholics and be living with them, if you can survive this you can survive anything!! brandyII.

Hi, I also am an adult child of an alcoholic parent (father) mother died when I was 14 years old, but I am blessed now that he has passed away and has been two years last February. I only say blessed because I allowed myself to be emotionally tortured by his alcoholism even when he was an airplane ride away in order to see him but of course the phone was always there and he always called me or I him. I won't delve too deeply into it as I don't have to deal with "him" anymore just the the pain from the past that still lingers and I being the closest one to his "makeup" have taken on food as an emotional soother instead of alcohol. He was 80 and did die of a heart attack and had taken a cab from his Assisted Living Facility where I had place him a few months before to buy a gallon of scotch and they found him the next day still grasping that glass of scotch in his hand as it had froze around it over the night hours. It's a wonderful picture but I'm fortunate not to have seen in person. I wish all of you luck who still deal with living alcoholic parents as I'm sure there are many of you. It's not easy but for some reason once they die it is a bit easier and I'm not a cold person, I'm just honest a lot of pain went away when he died. brandyII:smile: One more thing, I put off having RNY surgery three years ago to take care of him because he was falling down and cracking his head open on a constant basis in his apartment and going to the ER and not cleaning up his apartment and the smell still lingers but I had the surgery (changed it to lap band) after he died and maybe I should have waited, I don't know but while I was taking care of him I lost weight but after his death put it back on so just an after thought......................

I took my daughter, she was 17 at the time to a new psychiatrist because I knew the medications she was on for her depression and panic attacks weren't helping. The new doctor happened to be at a psych facility thinking that would be a better choice plus they dealt with adolescence and children too. Anyway she had been cutting and told me so and had felt suicidal. I thought that all I had to do was find a new doctor and after my daughter was honest and told her about her cutting and suicidal thoughts they pretty much forced me to put her in there. I say forced because I felt like they gave me no choice either she was going to kill herself or she go into for treatment. She really had no treatment but from their point of view they were keeping her from harming herself. She did not feel safe there and felt violated as they did a strip search on her upon entering the facility. This is a girl who also has major body issues and recently had the gastric bypass surgery. Needless to say, I've dealt with depression issues with myself and other family members but when it came to my own child being put into a facility like that which in some ways is kind of prison like which I'm sure is debatable but still it killed me inside as I can imagine it killed you inside too when your son went away to prison. I was lucky enough where it was close enough where I could go there a couple times a day but I don't think that was a good time of her life! It wasn't for me either and at least I know next time to search out probably a better option, I don't know. :confused2: Sometimes we really do the best we can and have no choice but we still feel every second of it and those seconds last a long time. It must have been hard for you also having gone through something similar to my daughter and then dealing with your son on top of it. I hope you're feeling better now, it's really hard. I still have many emotional issues when it comes to food and so I'm not the best lap bander in the world and probably never will be. But I'm not going to go off my medication just to speed up my metabolism either, been there, done that. Good luck to you and I hope you do much better than I have you certainly deserve all the happiness you can grab now, as you've had it pretty hard!! take care Nancy.:smile2:

Good luck to you Angie, sounds like you need a break!!!! brandyII

newhope4me, See and it all worked out in the end. It's not an uncommon situation that kids have issues like that due to problems they don't know how to deal with whether it's similar to yours or compounded also with just being a teen and dealing with all the stuff they do on a normal basis. I was a pretty good kid but by the time I was a teen I was hanging out with the druggy type kids self medicating I suppose. I turned out well and my kids have some issues with depression or anxiety but it's in our genes, not much we can do about that now except seek professional help. A lot of their friends though did end up coming here not because we were the "cool" house and I was giving them alcohol or cigarettes but because it was a stable kind of a safe house with no screaming and I guess just a somewhat normal life that most of them didn't have. I'm lucky not everyone has that kind of a home situation but I guess I kind of was intent on my kids not having the kind of life I had growing up with a mother dying too young and being raised by an alcoholic father (who functioned at work) but who was not exactly Mr. Brady at home. So spanking really isn't always the main problem it's what's underneath the spanking or hitting that's the problem. How parents interact with their kids when there are problems and I guess you get it where a lot of people don't. I used to work as an assistant in a special ed class for kids with special needs, ADD ADHD and sometimes they just had some real emotional problems and tended to act out in a normal classroom environment. They were difficult and we were taught how to deal with them when they acted out but sometimes when their parents would show up it kind of broke your heart because on one hand these kids had problems but then you saw the interaction between the child and the parent and you kind of understood that things may not get better and you worried what happened when they were home together. I'm probably just over sensitive and didn't work there long enough to be jaded but it always made me kind of sad. I'm glad that things have worked out so much better for you and your son. It's not easy when you're in a situation especially if you need to involve the police that in itself is a real heart breaker because you're basically using tough love but it's killing you at the same time! I haven't dealt with that end of things but have dealt with putting a child in a psych hospital for about a week and that was something I've never thought would hurt so bad! Anyway good luck to you, you sound like a great parent and should be proud!:smile2: brandyII.

I think most right wingers would disagree with you, I'm familiar with both sides of the fence and I'd say most right wingers would not think of ABC as right wing at all!

It was 102 degrees here today!!!, thankfully a cold front has just blown in so we can get back to normal.

pnutsmom, that really sucks, I mean don't most doctors put you on a diet prior to shrink the liver. Why would he take a chance like that and put you through that. I think that really sucks, sorry you had to go through that, but it's not your fault. My surgeon puts us on a 4 to 6 week medifast liquid Protein shake diet and it sucked but it's standard procedure. It amazes me the differences in all the preop stuff. Cheer up, you've got lots of buds here:thumbup:

My brother and sil lived in Portland for a few years when he was teaching there and they loved it and I'm still sorry I never got a chance to go there!! I think out of all the places they lived with their kids Portland is still their fav plus now they're where it's probably 100 degrees right now!

What plan? Is it a lap band plan?

I saw the clip from the Jon Stewart show and didn't happen to watch that particular episode but I got the joke right off the bat when it was shown on the Fox News Show clip. I naturally assumed that Barack Obama's medical history would be a lot smaller and that's how I took it so I didn't find it misleading on Fox's end and if anyone did they weren't too bright. Certainly wouldn't have expected 1,200 pages and I used to be an insurance processor for a lot men his his age group! But I guess I kind of fall in the middle, I like to get as many points of view as I can and I watch all cable news programs including Fox, CNN, CNBC, BBC, whatever is out there. If I only watched one that would be unfortunate. It's not easy to decipher the truth from any news program out there. There are states out there between New York and California and we have to remember that too. I watch Keith ? Olbermann too, even though he's obvious very liberal, I think it's good to get as many points of view as possible but still trying to figure what is true and what is biased or what is taken out of context is still very difficult for the average American, JMO.

If you're KeyWestGirl then why are you going to Hawaii? That's my only comment to you, jk. It's ok, you know it's not easy for any of us whether or not the ticker is moving down. We all have to deal with it the best way we can. Some of us have been fat all our lives and never thin, some gained after some major thing whether it be a trauma or a pregnancy and then there are people like me have been fat and thin and fat and thin and fat and thin and it's almost like your body is saying "whoaaaa nellie!!!!!!!!!!!". I kind of have to deal with it from the inside out if that makes sense and if my outside becomes thin now along the way than it's a big bonus but I can't put myself through anymore self hatred or why bother going on? I just ordered a book called "Self Esteem Comes in all Sizes..." and it should be in interesting read. Take care and good health to you brandyII:smile:

I kind of remember it myself and I thought he was referring to his wife when he said it, could be wrong.

Would a magic stick relieve my headache?

I'm posting because I have a headache from the heat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and it hurts:frown:

BJean, you say it so eloquently and in such simple terms I still don't see why people don't get it?????

I think Jimmy Carter was the only "democrat" who "still had lust in his heart for his wife Roselyn". (sp) That's pretty rare these days or am I wrong????

Okay, I brought up dead people as in "I'm glad I don't see dead people" and Froggie brought up Sex and the magic bullet but not in the context of sex but in the culinary aspects of the bullet, which comes in two sizes and then someone brought up random and I said dead bodies and sex are not random and something about the magic bullet and then I got really tired, and it's really hot outside!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 I still don't know what magic sticks are?????????????????????

Great insight and comparison!!! Imagine how sad you'd be when they picked up that little girl that you took the time with an they were slapping her around on the way to the car, would your stomach not drop??:thumbup:

Well on that note I shall say good night all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What did dead bodies, sex and the magic bullet have to do with cannibalism? Some people just don't get me!!!

Look what you did Froggie you scared Plain out of the room!