BigUtahMan

Great point. I know they did, it was my own shame and sense of failure that I introduced into the relationship. Most people I come in contact with during my day and life, I simply don't care what they think. But there are those few that I care a lot about what they think of me, and so I add those dynamics above because of my insecurities matched with my love and respect for them. Not their fault, it is all my crazy trying to project the best me with 150 extra pounds on my body. Thanks for your continued insight.

Blood clots are a big danger for 90 days! Just walk

Stay strong! Sorry you have a rough start, "but this too shall pass". This experience is making you stronger! I hope it passes quickly. Walk, walk, walk! Best of luck

I just kept telling myself, "I can do anything for two weeks". I can do anything for 10 days... etc...." it's much more of a head game than anything else, but it gives you the momentum to carry you through postop. PS- I wouldn't weigh yourself too much, as you shouldn't be focused on results as much as dedication to the program. The results will come if you follow the program, just look at all the pre/post updates for those who follow their program. Everyone who doesn't follow, disappeares. You are making a huge decision to change your life, you can do this! Keep the faith and respect the process

#1 goal for preop is to shrink the liver! Your Dr needs to navigate inside you body, your diet is specific to shrink your organs AND get you emotionally prepared for postop. The weight comes off, but for some people it was s slow and steady. Which can add a layer of difficulty in the beginning when anticipation is high. But those people who can persevere do much better as they follow the program much better. People who lose it fast often think it's easy and begin to cheat quickly and often and fail at following the program because they lost 50 lbs super quick. Follow the program and the weight will come off, our bodies are all different and respond differently. Be excited that you are on the path to the best you, and the healthiest you, physically, emotionally and mentally. Conquer the emotional and mental, then the physical follows. You got this!

Keto diet - removed all my food cravings. Mostly carb driven for me

My 2cents... The fundamentals never change. When ever our relationship with food is associated with emotional strings, success is exponentially more difficult to realize. Yes, all of us know what we are suppose to do, discovering the forces from keeping you from doing it is the key. While we all beat ourselves up for not being stronger or more disciplined, it is in vain until we face the real issues that influence our relationship with food and our ability to love ourselves. (There are often really good and valid reasons our relationship with food is toxic. Because of those valid reasons, it is even more difficult to resolve. But those are the reasons that drive our behavior and make us look weak or stupid when the issues prove stronger than our will.) I have found that Surgery is excellent to expose these issues, but not a universal plan to solve them. (Regardless of the protein consumed that day. ) Faith, therapy, love, and self discovery are the fundamentals of lasting change with our relationship with food and our health. (Not protein and exercise) Surgery simply lets you get a one time head start to lose the weight while you work the process that no doctor or nut can provide. Short term success is enjoyed when we dedicate ourselves to a diet plan, but it just isn't sustainable statistically speaking. Sooner or later we all need to find the courage to face the goblins in our closets and throw them out with our fat clothes, or we will likely need those clothes in the future.

In complete transparency- My "moment" is when I started to do "Olympic gymnastics" just to wipe myself on the toilet. I never admitted that to friends and family, but I didn't want to live my life in the condition or worse because of my weight. Everything else just added to that. I felt so ashamed this past November when I visited long time family friends feeling and looking huge. I felt like such a failure in so many ways. I was not comfortable in my skin, in my clothes, in my Dr's office, and more and more in my life. At age 47, the thoughts of life expectancy became a reoccurring thought. Will I love to see my 9 year old get married? Will I love to see my grandkids? Will I be home bound? While I realize I am a food addict, attending addiction recovery meetings weren't enough for me to make lasting change. So while I resisted surgery, trying to just do the same thing surgery would do for me, I failed at it. So then the dialogue changed to, If not now, then when? How bad does it need to become, before I allow myself the ability to leverage surgery."

Here are some thoughts.... First, glad you are safe. Be glad the Dr was more concerned about your life than the procedure. Yes your life is worth more than 50, and its worth more than 150, or even 550. The reason I risked my life for the procedure is because my life was worth more than the extra 150 pounds I was carrying. I got to the point of, I will die sooner if I don't control my weight, including diabetes and all the other comorbidities I was developing than having the surgery. If this procedure is just so you can "look" better, not sure if it is worth it. When this procedure is saving your life, it is a much easier decision. I also exhausted all my other alternative solutions other than surgery. So that too helped me realize, I either continue down the unhealthy path I am on, or I have surgery. If you are not at that point, I may hold off having surgery as well.

How long is a piece of string? There are several different preop diets, and many more factors that dictate the rate of weight loss including starting weight, age, activity level, water retention, hormones, stress, the list goes on. But the important thing is doing what you are doing and sticking to the plan no matter what the results. Often people who drop weight fast become relaxed with the program and it hurts them in the long run. So while you early success is awesome, be careful not to let it work against you. Glad you are having success, keep up the great work!

@bostongary, Would love to track with you and support each other. However if what you said is actually true, then I think I am a girl. : ) (But I am not that cool or smart.) As I have obsessed about food most of my life. I don't think it is gender based as much as it is individual. I believe everything you said, but I think that is also unique to you. I believe we all have our "real issues" which most of us are unaware of until the weight starts coming off. We also have our own "perceived issues" which are the issues we own and admit to. Sometimes those are the same, but many times they are different. A real issue maybe the abuse you suffered not related to food directly, but is a major influence on your ability to love yourself, or be in a vulnerable situation. Food relationship becomes the "perceived issue or symptom, your abuse remains the "real issue". What I like most about @bellabloom is her transformation from perceived issues by losing weight, to her real issues of her relationship with food and herself. With the honest transparency and vulnerability with how she navigated through both of them. Some back-ground: This is my second procedure, I was banded 12 years ago. (With a lot of success. 375 to 230) But I can tell you, while I was successful losing the weight and keeping most of it off for 7 years, I was unsuccessful at dealing with the "real issues" during that time. As once the band was removed (for medical reasons), all the weight came storming back. So while I conquered all my perceived issues and felt secure during those 7 years with the results to prove it, in reality, I failed at addressing my "real issues". That really played head games with me gaining my weight back, as I thought I was over it. But reality doesn't change just because it isn't convenient or uncomfortable. So I had to come to terms that I needed a medical procedure again(!) to physically help me address my "real issues" which are mental/emotional based. So now I have the blessing to try and learn and conquer my real issues again! I can tell all of you who are having success losing weight, enjoy it, love it, celebrate it, but don't let it blind you from other issues still under the surface. If you don't have them, hurray! I do not wish people to have issues they don't, but I was ignorant to mine because of the success of the surgery. It allowed me to ignore my real issues, instead of face them.

Thank you for sharing and especially your insight. Yes, I agree 128 looks much healthier. Congrats on your self discovery and development on a healthier you. I really value the realization that there eventually comes a point where weight loss is not the final answer, which is a difficult concept for all of us who have only dealt with the other side of the spectrum. It is a comfort to know there is a person who has successfully navigated the waters to a healthy balance of life and relationship with food. Congrats and please keep posting!

Amazing story and transformation, very inspirational! Thank you for sharing the struggle with the victory. Can you please elaborate on your "intuitive eating" philosophy?

You are not alone, lap-band complications almost took my life too before it was removed. I too gained the weight back, and was sleeved last November. Basically it's the same drill, you got this.

Very well said and agree, everything is easy for the people who don't have to do it. I am often tempted to reply those people with something like, "I maybe fat, but I can lose my weight and change, now matter how much you weigh you are still a jerk!" But I don't as it is not the person I want to be, but if often goes through my mind.

I like measurements over weight as it often is more accurate for real success. It is also less eradic, so there is less yo -yo

Great insight

I hope you realize these struggles you are going through are forcing you to be stronger and more aware of everything. While it is always difficult, you , unlike most will have a unique confidence when you hit your goal weight because of everything you just listed. That my friend is very valuable. I know you are also venting, but remember to have confidence running your own race. I have to remind myself this daily, as it is human nature to compare ourselves to others in all areas of life, but it simply doesn't have much value as we always see what we want to see, through very distorted glasses. You are strong, and you will achieve what you focus on, keep the faith and stay focused. (Sorry for the sermons, I just want to help you like you helped me.)

Wow

Welcome to the rest of your life!

Congrats, keep it up!

I would never advise being "strict" as that usually means unsustainable expectation on oneself, but I would advise continued focus to change your relationship with food. I think you are closer than you likely realize at this moment in many different areas of your life to success, there appears to be a lot of change happening inside and outside your body that you are in the process of figuring out. My advice, just relax, live, and enjoy your body and your new shape as you continue down the path. Again, you have already done the hard part, only a small percentage of people ever had the issue you are facing, to lose weight after you already lost over 200 lbs, you are doing great. You can do this, as you have already proven to yourself and world. You got this, don't put a timer on your greatness.

@Dashofpixiedust8 - you may want to throw your scale away for a few weeks or months, and just not focus on your immediate weight. The one draw-back of the challenge is it made me check my weight weekly or even more often daily. By default that sets an expectation in my head for change each time I step on the scale when what I should only be measuring is our commitment to our plans and our body dimensions. Every time you get on that scale; you have a chance of disappointment, so you may consider stopping to put yourself in that position. Living or dying by the daily results is usually the source of mental brain damage in those situations. You clearly seem to be out of the "easy weight loss" stage, (when the weight seems just to fall off because we breathed) and that is OK and victory unto itself. You have time on your side to lose more weight; it will happen! Follow the plan that lead you to lose first 250 lbs, and just trust your body that it still knows what to do, without the preconceived idea of how fast you expect it to happen.

@dashofpixiedust8 - keep the faith, slow and steady wins the race. You are just in a nasty stall (which fixes itself) or you are having trouble sticking to plan, (which you can fix when you are ready to focus again.) Life never remains easy or hard, and your situation will change. Staying at a weight during a crisis is a HUGE victory.

Isn't it interesting with our relationship between our own bodies and our spirits. Sometimes, people and ourselves only see a body, (beautiful or ugly, fat or fit). While other times, regardless of our body's current condition, our spirit shines through regardless. I love the fact your spirit has remained in control. (As I believe our spirits are eternal, our bodies are temporary.) While my wife is beautiful, I am in more love with her spirit, than her flesh. Her body is just the package she is wrapped in. I hope as I have focused so much effort restoring my body to a state of healthiness, I continue to develop into the person where my spirit dominates the relationship within myself, and my body doesn't impede my greater development of self. I too want to be physically attractive, but I value more the attraction to the soul as that improves with age instead of deteriorates. Thank you for sharing your strong spirit and reminding me of my own values. Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App