amandalp1021

Definitely going to reach out to a therapist. Thank you so much for the encouragement!
I think I may know at least some of the reasons why I'm so off track. I was always a very big girl since I was a kid. And I just kept gaining weight until about 15 years old when it caused a big health problem. Since then (I'm 30 years old now) I've known nothing but dieting and/or gaining. And that was/is my life. A constant yo-yo diet. And I don't know if it's my OCD, but I go to extremes. I'm super obsessed with calorie counting and tracking and "perfect" eating and constant exercise or I'm completely off course, binging and giving up. I think once I hit my goal weight, a flip of panic switched off in my mind. It was like "uh oh. What do we do now?" I don't know how to maintain, I never maintained my weight before. And I don't know what it's like to live life not being focused on food every second of every day. The more I write, the more I realize how much I need psychological intervention lol.

I'm going to reach out to the psychologist that I used to speak to a few years ago. I tried to avoid it, but I think I really need it. Thank you!

Hey everyone! Sorry I haven't responded. Just an update...I went back to my therapist on 10/30/18 and we're going to start sessions again. I used to see him pre-surgery and he specializes in eating disorders and OCD. I'm hopeful and will keep you posted. Thank you so much for all the feedback

I'm going to reach out to the psychologist that I used to speak to a few years ago. I tried to avoid it, but I think I really need it. Thank you!

Hey everyone! Sorry I haven't responded. Just an update...I went back to my therapist on 10/30/18 and we're going to start sessions again. I used to see him pre-surgery and he specializes in eating disorders and OCD. I'm hopeful and will keep you posted. Thank you so much for all the feedback

Hey everyone! Sorry I haven't responded. Just an update...I went back to my therapist on 10/30/18 and we're going to start sessions again. I used to see him pre-surgery and he specializes in eating disorders and OCD. I'm hopeful and will keep you posted. Thank you so much for all the feedback

I'm definitely going to set another goal. That's something I really need.

Definitely going to reach out to a therapist. Thank you so much for the encouragement!
I think I may know at least some of the reasons why I'm so off track. I was always a very big girl since I was a kid. And I just kept gaining weight until about 15 years old when it caused a big health problem. Since then (I'm 30 years old now) I've known nothing but dieting and/or gaining. And that was/is my life. A constant yo-yo diet. And I don't know if it's my OCD, but I go to extremes. I'm super obsessed with calorie counting and tracking and "perfect" eating and constant exercise or I'm completely off course, binging and giving up. I think once I hit my goal weight, a flip of panic switched off in my mind. It was like "uh oh. What do we do now?" I don't know how to maintain, I never maintained my weight before. And I don't know what it's like to live life not being focused on food every second of every day. The more I write, the more I realize how much I need psychological intervention lol.

I think it did start once I reached my goal. A sort of panic set in where I didn't know what to do anymore. All I know is dieting and gaining weight. So maintenance is a totally new world for me.

Definitely going to reach out to a therapist. Thank you so much for the encouragement!
I think I may know at least some of the reasons why I'm so off track. I was always a very big girl since I was a kid. And I just kept gaining weight until about 15 years old when it caused a big health problem. Since then (I'm 30 years old now) I've known nothing but dieting and/or gaining. And that was/is my life. A constant yo-yo diet. And I don't know if it's my OCD, but I go to extremes. I'm super obsessed with calorie counting and tracking and "perfect" eating and constant exercise or I'm completely off course, binging and giving up. I think once I hit my goal weight, a flip of panic switched off in my mind. It was like "uh oh. What do we do now?" I don't know how to maintain, I never maintained my weight before. And I don't know what it's like to live life not being focused on food every second of every day. The more I write, the more I realize how much I need psychological intervention lol.

I'm going to reach out to the psychologist that I used to speak to a few years ago. I tried to avoid it, but I think I really need it. Thank you!

Hey everyone! Sorry I haven't responded. Just an update...I went back to my therapist on 10/30/18 and we're going to start sessions again. I used to see him pre-surgery and he specializes in eating disorders and OCD. I'm hopeful and will keep you posted. Thank you so much for all the feedback

Hey everyone! Sorry I haven't responded. Just an update...I went back to my therapist on 10/30/18 and we're going to start sessions again. I used to see him pre-surgery and he specializes in eating disorders and OCD. I'm hopeful and will keep you posted. Thank you so much for all the feedback

I think it did start once I reached my goal. A sort of panic set in where I didn't know what to do anymore. All I know is dieting and gaining weight. So maintenance is a totally new world for me.

Definitely going to reach out to a therapist. Thank you so much for the encouragement!
I think I may know at least some of the reasons why I'm so off track. I was always a very big girl since I was a kid. And I just kept gaining weight until about 15 years old when it caused a big health problem. Since then (I'm 30 years old now) I've known nothing but dieting and/or gaining. And that was/is my life. A constant yo-yo diet. And I don't know if it's my OCD, but I go to extremes. I'm super obsessed with calorie counting and tracking and "perfect" eating and constant exercise or I'm completely off course, binging and giving up. I think once I hit my goal weight, a flip of panic switched off in my mind. It was like "uh oh. What do we do now?" I don't know how to maintain, I never maintained my weight before. And I don't know what it's like to live life not being focused on food every second of every day. The more I write, the more I realize how much I need psychological intervention lol.

Hello everyone! I’ll try to get straight to the point, and give my backstory after...
I’m 2 years post-op, lost over 210 pounds, but I’m slipping back into old habits, and have already gained 15 pounds. I’m petrified of becoming what I once was. Here are the details of my journey:
I had gastric sleeve surgery September 28, 2016. I started at 348 pounds and the lowest number I’ve seen on the scale was 135. My goal weight was under 145 but I kept pushing it . I couldn’t stay at 135 very long (about a week), I would fluctuate back up to 140 and attempt to get back down to 135. My friends and family told me I looked gaunt at that weight (and they were right) so I eased my anxieties and decided that between 140 and 145 pounds was right for me. But ever since I reached that initial goal of less than 145 and hit the “maintenance” stage I feel like I’ve been spiraling. For a good year and a half I consistently exercised 5 days a week, now it’s been two weeks since I’ve worked out. I binge, and can consume 5,000 calories easily in a day (eating around the sleeve of course). Every time I try to get back on track I fall off the horse. I will admit that I think I was able to lose so much weight because I was obsessive. I have diagnosed OCD and I’m medicated for it. I don’t know if that’s related. Right now I’m 151. I took a “week off” from my exercise and proper diet for my birthday and went from 145.6 to 152. I tried to reset this week but yesterday and the day before I went on a spree again and ate 4,000 calories each day. I don’t know how to reel myself in and just be normal. My whole life I’ve either been dieting or gaining. I don’t know how to maintain. I’m so scared to revert to my old self

Were all human and don't beat yourselves up we mess up. You've done so amazing on your weight loss and gaining a couple pounds isn't the end of the world. You made it just don't let yourself get to you. You've done it before and you can do it again easier said than done just be proud and be happy with yourself. I'm sure you'll get back to a better you again.

Thank you so much. I'm definitely going to have a heart-to-heart with myself today and really understand myself and my habits

Definitely going to reach out to a therapist. Thank you so much for the encouragement!
I think I may know at least some of the reasons why I'm so off track. I was always a very big girl since I was a kid. And I just kept gaining weight until about 15 years old when it caused a big health problem. Since then (I'm 30 years old now) I've known nothing but dieting and/or gaining. And that was/is my life. A constant yo-yo diet. And I don't know if it's my OCD, but I go to extremes. I'm super obsessed with calorie counting and tracking and "perfect" eating and constant exercise or I'm completely off course, binging and giving up. I think once I hit my goal weight, a flip of panic switched off in my mind. It was like "uh oh. What do we do now?" I don't know how to maintain, I never maintained my weight before. And I don't know what it's like to live life not being focused on food every second of every day. The more I write, the more I realize how much I need psychological intervention lol.

Hello everyone! I’ll try to get straight to the point, and give my backstory after...
I’m 2 years post-op, lost over 210 pounds, but I’m slipping back into old habits, and have already gained 15 pounds. I’m petrified of becoming what I once was. Here are the details of my journey:
I had gastric sleeve surgery September 28, 2016. I started at 348 pounds and the lowest number I’ve seen on the scale was 135. My goal weight was under 145 but I kept pushing it . I couldn’t stay at 135 very long (about a week), I would fluctuate back up to 140 and attempt to get back down to 135. My friends and family told me I looked gaunt at that weight (and they were right) so I eased my anxieties and decided that between 140 and 145 pounds was right for me. But ever since I reached that initial goal of less than 145 and hit the “maintenance” stage I feel like I’ve been spiraling. For a good year and a half I consistently exercised 5 days a week, now it’s been two weeks since I’ve worked out. I binge, and can consume 5,000 calories easily in a day (eating around the sleeve of course). Every time I try to get back on track I fall off the horse. I will admit that I think I was able to lose so much weight because I was obsessive. I have diagnosed OCD and I’m medicated for it. I don’t know if that’s related. Right now I’m 151. I took a “week off” from my exercise and proper diet for my birthday and went from 145.6 to 152. I tried to reset this week but yesterday and the day before I went on a spree again and ate 4,000 calories each day. I don’t know how to reel myself in and just be normal. My whole life I’ve either been dieting or gaining. I don’t know how to maintain. I’m so scared to revert to my old self

Definitely going to reach out to a therapist. Thank you so much for the encouragement!
I think I may know at least some of the reasons why I'm so off track. I was always a very big girl since I was a kid. And I just kept gaining weight until about 15 years old when it caused a big health problem. Since then (I'm 30 years old now) I've known nothing but dieting and/or gaining. And that was/is my life. A constant yo-yo diet. And I don't know if it's my OCD, but I go to extremes. I'm super obsessed with calorie counting and tracking and "perfect" eating and constant exercise or I'm completely off course, binging and giving up. I think once I hit my goal weight, a flip of panic switched off in my mind. It was like "uh oh. What do we do now?" I don't know how to maintain, I never maintained my weight before. And I don't know what it's like to live life not being focused on food every second of every day. The more I write, the more I realize how much I need psychological intervention lol.

Hello everyone! I’ll try to get straight to the point, and give my backstory after...
I’m 2 years post-op, lost over 210 pounds, but I’m slipping back into old habits, and have already gained 15 pounds. I’m petrified of becoming what I once was. Here are the details of my journey:
I had gastric sleeve surgery September 28, 2016. I started at 348 pounds and the lowest number I’ve seen on the scale was 135. My goal weight was under 145 but I kept pushing it . I couldn’t stay at 135 very long (about a week), I would fluctuate back up to 140 and attempt to get back down to 135. My friends and family told me I looked gaunt at that weight (and they were right) so I eased my anxieties and decided that between 140 and 145 pounds was right for me. But ever since I reached that initial goal of less than 145 and hit the “maintenance” stage I feel like I’ve been spiraling. For a good year and a half I consistently exercised 5 days a week, now it’s been two weeks since I’ve worked out. I binge, and can consume 5,000 calories easily in a day (eating around the sleeve of course). Every time I try to get back on track I fall off the horse. I will admit that I think I was able to lose so much weight because I was obsessive. I have diagnosed OCD and I’m medicated for it. I don’t know if that’s related. Right now I’m 151. I took a “week off” from my exercise and proper diet for my birthday and went from 145.6 to 152. I tried to reset this week but yesterday and the day before I went on a spree again and ate 4,000 calories each day. I don’t know how to reel myself in and just be normal. My whole life I’ve either been dieting or gaining. I don’t know how to maintain. I’m so scared to revert to my old self

I'm going to reach out to the psychologist that I used to speak to a few years ago. I tried to avoid it, but I think I really need it. Thank you!

Hello everyone! I’ll try to get straight to the point, and give my backstory after...
I’m 2 years post-op, lost over 210 pounds, but I’m slipping back into old habits, and have already gained 15 pounds. I’m petrified of becoming what I once was. Here are the details of my journey:
I had gastric sleeve surgery September 28, 2016. I started at 348 pounds and the lowest number I’ve seen on the scale was 135. My goal weight was under 145 but I kept pushing it . I couldn’t stay at 135 very long (about a week), I would fluctuate back up to 140 and attempt to get back down to 135. My friends and family told me I looked gaunt at that weight (and they were right) so I eased my anxieties and decided that between 140 and 145 pounds was right for me. But ever since I reached that initial goal of less than 145 and hit the “maintenance” stage I feel like I’ve been spiraling. For a good year and a half I consistently exercised 5 days a week, now it’s been two weeks since I’ve worked out. I binge, and can consume 5,000 calories easily in a day (eating around the sleeve of course). Every time I try to get back on track I fall off the horse. I will admit that I think I was able to lose so much weight because I was obsessive. I have diagnosed OCD and I’m medicated for it. I don’t know if that’s related. Right now I’m 151. I took a “week off” from my exercise and proper diet for my birthday and went from 145.6 to 152. I tried to reset this week but yesterday and the day before I went on a spree again and ate 4,000 calories each day. I don’t know how to reel myself in and just be normal. My whole life I’ve either been dieting or gaining. I don’t know how to maintain. I’m so scared to revert to my old self

I'm going to reach out to the psychologist that I used to speak to a few years ago. I tried to avoid it, but I think I really need it. Thank you!