JAM72

The doctors and staff at UT Southwestern have been amazing! I saw Dr. Puzziferri, who I adore. She's doing a lot of cutting-edge research on obesity and surgery. I visited several other docs before making my decision, and none held a candle to UTSW. Beautiful hospital, low complication rates (I didn't have any), professional people, helpful, caring, etc. I wouldn't go anywhere else, and I'm very picky and risk-averse.

@@Heather I - a LB 14 is similar to a BR/AT 16 for looser styles and an 18 for more body-conscious, tight styles. At least that is what I have found based on my body shape. You can find bigger AT and BR sizes online but not always in the store. One way to compare sizing in different stores is to check sizing guides and compare measurements. That has worked well for me. Hope this helps!!

@@carlyanncan - my surgery date is November 18th at UT Southwestern in Dallas. I've been having weird dreams too!! The most common one (had it again last night) goes like this: I sell my current house, which I love, and move into a new house which I initially thought would be great. Then, I realize I don't like it after all, I get upset, and I regret that I let the old house go. I think it's about the surgery - afraid that after I get the surgery I will regret it or be miserable. I'm also working with a great counselor who is helping me work through all these emotions.

Good luck with your pre-op diet! I start mine on the 4th.

@@pb88 - I've been thinking of you and wondering if you had any luck with your insurance company. Did they end up paying your surgery bills?

@@butterfly23 - thank you for your reply and for sharing your perspective! I've read many of your other posts on this site and am really inspired by your journey and success.

I know the serenity prayer well (from my mom, who struggled with alcoholism). I haven't thought of it for a long time, but it's so appropriate. Thank you for the reminder!

@@Teagrrl - you are just like me! I have been working with my counselor on this over the last few weeks. What is helping me a little right now is reading about weight loss studies. The results are grim; only a small percentage of people are able to lose weight without surgery and keep it off for any length of time. This does two things for me:

1) it is helping me change my negative thoughts about myself. There are LOTS of people in my shoes who also can't lose weight on their own. And it's not because of a lack of willpower or that we don't know how to diet or because there is something wrong with our character. Our bodies are complex and, for reasons we don't understand yet, are incredibly resistant to weight loss.

2) it is reinforcing that I am making the right decision. I really, honestly want to solve this issue, and surgery is the smartest option. For me.

I am scared. So scared I will fail. But I have to try. So that's where I'm at today.

I'd love to hear about your journey as you go through your initial consults. Good luck!

@@ereese310 - If you are going to appeal, I would also start on a 6-month medically-supervised program asap. It can't hurt to do so, and if it really is required, you will have gotten a head start on it (I think it can take 30 + days to process an appeal). I would be questioning why your surgeon's office gave you incorrect information about your insurance requirements. It also looks like they want you to address your GERD. Your surgeon's office should be able to guide you through all of this. They don't get paid unless they do [emoji6]

@@gowalking - Thank you for your reassuring words. I have to admit that part of why I chose the sleeve was because if I fail yet again, there is still one more option available to me (revision to RNY). I need to keep a positive mindset - I'm working on it. Hearing that this is normal and other people feel the same fears is helps me beat back the doubt that creeps into my thoughts. Thank you!

@@roger star - Thank you for the support! Good luck to you on your journey - you'll start feeling better soon and will be able to enjoy running around with your grandchildren!

@@Cervidae - Just sent you a follow request - jmill72. Hope you don't think I'm stalking you! I just really identified with your reply to me on my fear and desperation post and have found your other posts to be equally inspiring and very much like me. Wishing you continued success!

@@Cervidae - your story and photos resonate with me so much!! Thank you for sharing your story - it inspires me and gives me hope.

@@tinabina5 - Thank you so much for sharing your perspective! I feel exactly the same way - this is a drastic step, but one I feel confident I need to take. I also intend to remain vigilant. I really don't ever want to feel the way I physically feel today. I read a quote recently that said, "There is a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in something, you do it only when it's convenient. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results." I think that's going to be my new motto after surgery to help me stay committed to following the steps I need to take. Best of luck to you with your journey! Hope you are starting to feel better after surgery!

@@Cervidae - YES and YES!! Thank you so much for sharing your story! I also can't quite wrap my mind around the idea that this will actually work since I've failed 100% of my past attempts. This is also where the desperation comes from - the idea that I may be overweight forever. I love your approach. I read a post by someone recently who said they never actually set a goal weight. They just followed their surgeon's program, focused on making healthy choices, and let the chips fall where they may. And both of you have had tremendous success! I think I need to follow your lead and surrender myself to the surgery, so to speak. Focus on controlling what I can control, which are my choices but not the outcome. Thank you again for taking the time to reply! Your success is so inspiring!

@@James Marusek @@laceemouse @@WLSResources/ClothingExch @@shedo82773 - thank you so much for your replies! Hearing from people who have gone through the surgery is SO helpful, and I really appreciate you taking the time to write a response. I know the surgery is a tool and I fully intend to follow the rules laid out by my surgeon. I also know I am going to have to closely monitor my food intake and weight forever and continue to work through my food issues with my counselor - all part of the deal. I'm just struggling to comprehend how this tool will affect the desperation and hopelessness I have felt about my weight situation, watching my weight creep up and up for years despite all the diets and exercise routines I've tried. And that's where your insights are really helpful to me. Thank you again!

Looking for others who may have felt the same way before WLS:

I suffer from mild, general anxiety and have been seeing a wonderful counselor for about 6 months. During that time, we started talking about my weight, whether I wanted to do something about it, and what that might be. This led me to finally move forward with WLS, which I had thought about on and off for a couple of years. I am 40 days out from my sleeve surgery.

However...

In my heart of hearts, I feel that something is fundamentally "wrong" with me. I am pretty driven and resilient and have been "successful" in other important areas of my life (school, career, marriage, family). But my weight is the ONE THING I haven't been able to tackle successfully on my own. Why?? How on earth did I allow myself to get this way? And why should I expect that this time is going to be any different than all the other times I've tried to lose weight?

I feel desperate and scared. WLS is my last chance - the "nuclear" option. I am so worried that I will fail again. I know the statistics are on my side in terms of success, but my many, many past failures make it really hard to believe this is going to work. I can't seem to shake this feeling.

Did anyone else go through this? Did it get better after the surgery when you started having success?

Thanks to all who reply!

Thank you so much @@BobScott! I really appreciate the support! I just received a list of all of my pre- and post-op appointments this morning and am so excited. I also installed a countdown timer on my phone ... 43 days, 20 hours left til surgery!

Super inspiring! My surgery is scheduled for November 18, and I am counting down the days. I have also wondered about how to deal with what I call "trigger" foods - bread, Pasta, rice, sugar - and like your idea of not introducing them back into your diet post-surgery. Thank you for the inspiring and informative post!!

I am also scheduled for November 18! I am more impatient than scared at this point. It's been a long road and I'm ready to get on with it already!

I have BCBS of TX and it took 3 weeks for them to produce the "official" approval letter (I just received it last week). The waiting is horrible, I know. I've tried to keep myself busy with other things but it's difficult when you finally make this life-changing decision and are anxious to get on with it!

@@pb88 - Sending good thoughts and prayers your way. Can I ask - which doctor did you use?

@@pb88 - Have you had any luck sorting out your insurance issue? I also have BCBS TX and your post makes me nervous!

I am anxiously waiting for my final insurance approval and surgery date. As I've been waiting, I've been thinking a lot about this topic. My top NSVs are:

1. Be able to get through my yoga class without having to modify the poses because my body is too big to get into the proper position.

2. Recognize myself in the mirror. Today, I avoid them because I don't recognize the person staring back at me as "me." It's so uncomfortable when your insides don't match the outside.

3. Be able to cover myself in a standard sized towel rather than a bath sheet. I travel a lot and hotel towels are never big enough!

4. Enjoy (or at least not dread) having my picture taken. I regret that I have so few pictures of myself and my kids when they were small.

5. Not dread going to school and my kids' sporting events for fear of being the biggest mom there (most other moms in my area are pretty fit).

6. Not having to shop in the plus-sized section or order everything online because the clothing stores I like don't carry my size in-store.

@@Kevin Morris - I am also going to UTSW. I have completed all of my pre-op requirements and am meeting with the surgeon for my last appointment this week. I LOVE the doctors and staff, but it seems like the process is taking quite a long time because the doctors' schedules are so booked up. Do you remember how long you had to wait after insurance approval to actually have surgery? Thanks!

@ - thank you so much for your honest and eye-opening post. I absolutely love the surgical team I'm working with (I am finishing up the last pre-op tests) and they are very quick to answer questions I pose to them, but I didn't know about about many of these things, including the hormone dump. I'm so thankful for this group! Thank you all so much for sharing your stories!

Vega makes very healthy plant-based meal replacements and Protein shakes. I've come to love the taste, but it did take some getting used to. A lower Protein but tastier option is Svelte-brand shakes. I like the Cappuccino flavor a lot but there are several. Both are a bit pricey so I wait for a good sale at GNC or LuckyVitamin.com and stock up.

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