Dashofpixiedust8

@sleevedshereenI know. It's incredibly hard to just relax and let it be...but that's kind of what you have to do. My boyfriend has been thin and fit his entire life. He doesn't understand what I'm going through, but he is proud of all I've done. I talk to him about my body image issues and he just holds my hand and tells me he can't imagine what I'm going through because he has never been overweight but I've accomplished amazing things and I should be proud of what I've done. I hate my extra skin, especially on my thighs. I feel like my extra skin there makes it look like I have huge testicles, and I'm not exaggerating. But he thinks I'm sexy anyway. Who you are is what your boyfriend is attracted to. Looks are just a tiny part of it. If you become too scared of being a statistic it will come true. I promise you. It seems like he really cares about you and thinks you are sexy for who you are. Try to just enjoy being with him. If you want to get plastic surgery, get it, but do it for you. I had my stomach flap removed in June. I am not at goal yet but it was affecting my quality of life since it was so large. They removed 15 pounds of skin from that one part of me. That kind of gives you an idea of how much extra skin is on the rest of me. If he cares of about you, what you look like will not change his feelings. He will think you are the most gorgeous girl because he loves you. Try to remember that.

Definitely. Though, I was single when I had my surgery. I see so many stories of people getting divorces and breaking up after the weight loss that it has scared me alot. I'm much thinner than I was and am now just a bit overweight but even so, I voiced my fear with the guy I'm seeing now because he's said he has been preferring bigger women. I told him I was afraid when I get to goal he will no longer find me attractive. He told me he will always find me attractive, that weight isn't the only thing attractive about me. He has also seen me with all of this extra skin (there is a ton since I've lost over 295 pounds!) and he STILL loves to see me naked (TMI maybe lol). I think we worry about our bodies MUCH more than our guys do. I think my biggest advice is don't let your fear become the wedge between you two. If you worry about it too much it will make these thoughts come true. Be confident (I know this is hard) in you and your relationship. It will only cause unneeded stress that is making something big out of something that doesn't even matter to him. Good luck to you! We are always here for you if you need to vent too!

I totally get it. It's crazy how our culture is so food centric. I say find new activities to do with friends and family. I know you said you don't like the outdoors and such but there are other things to do than just physical activity. When I was so soon out of surgery I didn't do anything physically active. If your friends and family are supportive of this journey of yours (which I hope they are) they will respect the fact that right now (especially when you are still on liquid diet) your hang outs need to be without food. It will get much much easier once you can eat regular food again. When you can you will enjoy cooking again and you will just cook things that are healthier but still delicious. My friends LOVE when I cook and are ALWAYS amazed that it is low calorie. Good for you food doesn't have to mean boring. For now though, think about things you can do together that would still be fun. For me that was things like game nights, paint nights, going to a place like dave and busters and playing games, this soon out from surgery you can't go bowling but thats an option down the line, miniature golf is also fun. Doing an activity doesn't always have to mean hiking or canoeing or something. If you like music what about going out for karaoke with friends. The hardest part of this journey is right now, while you are on a liquid diet. It will get much easier. I promise. Hang in there!

This is long and possibly triggering so you don't have to read it all but this is my story.... I was sexually abused by a neighbor when I was 5. That was when I started emotionally eating and packing on the pounds. It was also when my depression started. I was suicidal at 6 years old. My parents were thin their entire lives but also started putting on weight around this time. I think we all dealt with it in a negative way. I was always much heavier than my classmates. At age 10 I was already wearing an adult size 14/16. I am and always was the tallest in my class. At least until the boys started growing. I am now a little over 5'10. I struggled with depression and bipolar my entire childhood and adolescence. I even got so bad I tried to runaway at 15 and I also tried to kill myself when I was 16. My weight was a big factor in that but I never had the strength to change it. When I graduated high school I was wearing a size 22/24 or 26/28. I tried so many diets over the years. I did medically supervised, liquid, jenny craig, weight watchers, south beach, atkins, I even went to the weight loss center at Duke when I was 18 years old and lost 30 pounds but then gained it all back when I got back. In 2007, age 21, I went for a consultation to get lapband surgery weighing in at 380 pounds. I had to do 6 months of a supervised diet and had the surgery in 2008. The lowest weight I got to after surgery was 280 pounds. I started having complications with the lapband and everything made me throw up. They loosened the restriction completely and my weight kept piling on. By 2012 my weight was up to 480 pounds. They then removed the lapband because of the issues. Over the years my weight stayed around 480 until I started gaining again. The scary thing is I was okay with being overweight. I saw no issue in it. My breaking point was in October of 2015 I went to the hospital with chest pains at 28 years old. They kept me for a few days because my oxygen was low. The doctor wanted to get a cat scan and the radiologist didn't even want to do it because I was over the weight limit. I had told them I weighed 480 pounds because that's what I thought I weighed, I hadn't gotten on a scale for many years. It suddenly hit me that I was getting so heavy that doctor's couldn't even treat me. My doctor had to fight and push for them to preform the cat scan. I ended up having to go on portable oxygen 24/7 because at that point I was so overweight the fat was pressing against my lungs and restricting my breathing. I realized if I didn't do something drastic about my weight I was going to die, probably before I hit 30 years old. The day I was released from the hospital is the day I called the bariatric surgeon. On my first visit I got on the scale and saw the number 540. That shocked me. I weighed a quarter of a ton. That hit me hard. I had 6 months of a medically supervised diet and had to lose at least 40 pounds before surgery because my surgeon doesn't even operate on people weighing over 500 pounds. In the 6 month supervised diet I was able to lose 60 pounds. I had surgery on May 29, 2016 at 480 pounds. I did have complications after surgery for 6 months but I would go through all of that again in a second to do this surgery again. Today I weigh 245 pounds. I wear a size 14/16 pant and size 12 top. When I started this in October of 2015 I wore a stretched out 6x. I have not been this size since I was 10 years old. I NEVER thought I would ever succeed at this. I NEVER though I would EVER be able to buy from the nonplus side. I feel like my life is a dream every day. I am so thankful for this surgery. I am so thankful for my team of doctors. And I am so thankful I finally woke up and saw that I was killing myself with food. I definitely still struggle, and I know it will be a lifelong struggle, but I am stronger emotionally and physically than ever before. I am finally able to actually live my life. I have a boyfriend who is amazingly sweet, funny and super hot. I am almost done my degree and I am able to go out with friends and even walk faster and longer than most of them now when before I could hardly walk 6 steps without having to stop. People call me an inspiration and honestly I don't feel like an inspiration, I feel like a warning story. My life until now is what you aren't supposed to do. All of us are here to change our lives for the better. I'm just glad I had my "aha" moment before it was too late.

@DedicatedLadyAww thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed the challenge!

CONGRATULATIONS to @DedicatedLady and @doingit4me2017! You posted every week and were the numbers randomly chosen by the computer to win the gift cards! Please message me your emails and I will send you one!

My weigh in this week was 245. Not much lost this week but I am down a total of 37.6 pounds during the challenge! I will definitely take that! I really enjoying doing this challenge with all of you! Thanks for joining in!

@rydersmama I'm happy doing it because you all appreciate it!

@Roux-en-McClanahan I am so incredibly sorry to hear that. *big hugs* It's their loss! I'm very impressed you still lost with such a big emotional upset! You did great and lost a total of 15.8 pounds this challenge! Thanks for joining in and I hope to see you in the next challenge!

@naturallyzee Thanks for joining in on the challenge! You did great and lost 16.6 pounds this challenge! I hope to see you in the next one! @Sleeveforme2017You did great this challenge and lost 18.4 pounds! Thanks for joining in and I hope to see you in the next challenge! I took your last weight as your final since I was late! congrats on making goal! @Torriluv87 Try and focus on the fact that you lost 8 pounds this challenge! I know it's hard to not think of the what ifs. Be proud of your loss and all you can do is move forward! Thanks for joining in on another challenge and I hope to see you in the next one! @Apple1 Congrats on making your goal! @leslaine Thanks for joining in on the challenge! You did great and lost 11.6 pounds during the challenge! I hope to see you in the next one! @klette0147 You already posted at 211? Do you want me to change it to 213? @dixonpratt Thanks for joining in! You did great and lost 16 pounds during the challenge! I hope to see you in the next challenge! @DedicatedLadyThanks for joining in on the challenge! Congrats on beating your goal! You lost an amazing 39 pounds during the challenge! I hope to see you in the next one! @Missy161 Sorry, I was away all weekend and this is my final week of classes so I got behind on updating the spreadsheet. I am updating it now. You can just click on the link in the first entry on this post!

@katieroybalThanks for joining in on the challenge! You lost a total of 8 pounds on the challenge! I hope to see you in the next challenge! @Michelle71 Even though you didn't lose any weight this week you are still down 14.6 pounds during the challenge! Thanks for joining in! I hope to see you in the next challenge! @Flippista You hardly gained though! It's good you caught yourself! You did great this challenge though and are down 14 pounds since the start! Thanks for joining in and I hope to see you in the next challenge! @NikkiPen Thanks for joining in on this challenge! You lost 11 pounds since you started the challenge! I hope to see you in the next one! @klette0147 Thanks for joining in on the challenge again! You lost 4 pounds this challenge! I hope to see you in the next challenge! @dede0314 Thanks for joining in on the challenge! Keep at it! I hope to see you in the next challenge! @braydens.momma Thanks for joining in again! You did great and lost 18.6 pounds this challenge! I hope to see you in the next one! @doingit4me2017 You did great this challenge! i'm sure you will hit onederland soon! Maybe in the next challenge! Thanks for joining in again! I hope to see you in the next challenge! @Pam_2-06-2017 PMS is the worst! It's not a real gain so just take a breath and think about the great loss you will have next week! Thanks for joining in! I hope to see you in the next challenge!

@jimp444 You stayed the same this week. I'm sorry this stall is giving you trouble! You still have done amazing and lost 28.6 pounds during this challenge! Be proud! Thanks for joining in! I hope to see you in the next one! @6'1Mommy I know the ups and downs of the scale can be discouraging, we just have to keep moving forward. You did great and lost 6 pounds during the challenge! Thanks for joining in! I hope to see you in the next one! @rydersmama You still did great and am down 1.1 pounds this challenge! Thanks for joining in again! I hope to see you in the next one! @Missy161 You did great and lost 32.2 pounds this challenge! Thanks for joining in! I hope to see you in the next one! @Entrise I'm so sorry Prednisone is the WORST! You will come back from this! Thanks for joining in again! You will lose it in the next challenge! @cassiegurl Thanks for joining in on the challenge! You lost 29 pounds this challenge! I hope to see you in the next one! @tinytummy17That's amazing! You made it to ONEDERLAND!!!! Thanks for joining in! You did great and lost 16.7 pounds this challenge! I hope to see you in the next challenge! @turtletoo Thanks for joining in the challenge! Keep at it! I hope you join the next one! @thisisthenewme Thanks for joining in on the challenge! You did great and lost 11 pounds this challenge and made it to onederland! I hope to see you in the next challenge!

@Apple1Thank you for joining in on this challenge! You had a great 8 weeks and even though you didn't meet your goal you lost 13.5 pounds! I hope to see you in the next challenge! @rubia72I'm so sorry you didn't reach your goal. I know it is frustrating but every challenge you weigh less and less. So even though you did not reach your goal this time you are still going down over all! thanks for joining this challenge again! I hope to see you in the next one! @chrys129 I totally understand! We can do it though! Thank you for joining the challenge! I hope to see you in the next one! @alcn1derlndI would count that as reaching your goal! Congrats! Thank you for joining in on this challenge! You did great and you lost 37.8 during the challenge! I hope to see you in the next challenge! @Mandi4417YAY! Congrats on making it to ONEDERLAND!!! Thank you for joining in on the challenge! You did great and you lost a total of 18.4 pounds! I hope to see you in the next one! @shelissI know it can be frustrating when the scale doesn't go the way we want. You still did amazing and lost 15 pounds during the challenge! Thank you for joining in! I hope to see you in the next one!

I can't believe it guys! I really can't! I am seriously crying tears of joy. When I started this process I was 540 pounds (I'm 5'10) and I wore a size 36/38. As a lot of you know I had my panniculectomy on June 5th and they removed 15 pounds of skin. Before my panniculectomy I wore a size 22 bottom and 14/16-18/20 top. I had bought smaller sized pants before my surgery because most of my pants were held up by my extra skin flap. Guys...I fit into a size EIGHTEEN!!! And I look super good!! I'm attaching some before and after pictures for you guys to enjoy! I can't believe this is real life! My stomach is flat!! (Please excuse my one drain in my one picture!)

Agree with @Introversion There are so many factors that go into whether you will have loose skin. Some people have very little and some people have a lot. There really isn't anything you can do to prevent it.

When you are on liquids it will be hard for you to tell when you are "full". That feeling will come easier once you are on pureed and solids.

@Torriluv87I can relate so much. I keep kicking myself that if I never went off plan I would be so much closer to goal now, maybe even at goal! I can't change what I've done just what I do in the future. You are so close to your nutritionist's goal! I have ALWAYS since the beginning had trouble getting in enough fluid. It's something I'm continuously trying to work on...

@Torriluv87 I have updated your goal! @Apple1 That is the important part! you can't focus on the number on the scale! @Mandi4417 you are sooo close to ONEDERLAND!! I'll be hoping for you next week! @dreamingsmall You don't need to have surgery already to join but there is only one weigh in left in the challenge. I will be doing another one though shortly after so you are welcome to join then!!

@naturallyzee I'm glad the scale is working with you again! @thisisthenewme That's such a great feeling! Congrats!

I kind of just need to vent and air out my laundry. So feel free to read on and offer advice as you see fit. I know it is long so you don’t have to read it either. Maybe you can relate, maybe you can’t but I wanted to share this with people who might understand. I do have some before and after pictures at the bottoms also if you just want to look at those! I am having a hard time lately. I had my sleeve surgery on 5/29/16. I started this process at the end of October 2015 weighing in at 540 pounds. I used to have to wear portable oxygen 24/7 because I was so overweight my fat was pressing against my lungs and restricting my breathing. I have managed to get down to 248 pounds since my surgery 14 months ago. Now I can walk 6 miles up and down hills without even getting out of breath. I just had the first of many plastic surgeries on June 5th. It was just an interim surgery since I am not at goal yet, but losing over 290 pounds will affect your skin drastically and I needed my stomach hang removed for quality of life reasons. I want many more plastic surgeries. My thighs are my biggest concern. My plastic surgeon told me he wants me to get to goal and wait at least 9 months at a stable weight before we do any more though. My doctor’s just want me to get to a size 12 or 10 as my goal. I started at a size 38/40 and now I am a size 14/16. That is insane to me honestly. I don’t think I have been a size 14/16 since I was 10 years old. Now, to be clear, I am a huge self-sabotager. I have been challenged by this since I was a kid. I have been in therapy since I was 6 with various issues and still see a great therapist every week. For over the past month I have not been cooking. Mostly because I had no energy and I was in pain still from my surgery. I don’t heal that great after surgery and it lasts with me a long time. Instead of meal planning and cooking I have been eating take out, sweets, and junk and I know it’s not helpful. Thankfully I have only gained about .8 of a pound with my self-sabotaging ways. Honestly guys, I think it’s because I’m scared. I’m scared of what it will be like without my fat around me. I have been overweight since I was 3 years old. It’s all I’ve known. I used to have day dreams when I was in school of just getting on the bus and unzipping myself from this fat suit I was stuck in and everyone being amazing at this beautiful girl I actually was. Here I am at 30, basically doing that and it terrifies me. I’m not saying I’m unhappy with the weightloss, not at all. I am ECSTATIC! I can actually live my life and join in on the world instead of being trapped in my body and only living as a shell of a human being. I can go to amusement parks and fit on the rides. Which is what I did this weekend as a kind of declaration of freedom and just a time to enjoy myself with friends. I can be active, I don’t need to worry about if I will fit in a small space (but still my mind tells me I won’t and I’m scared every time that I won’t fit. I was terrified to get on every roller coaster at the park. Not because of the ride, but I was afraid I wouldn’t fit and the embarrassment would kill me). This has been a draining experience, both physically and mentally. But for me, the mental part has been the hardest. I was able to recognize that I was self-sabotaging out of fear though. I was able to get up, shake myself off, and start again. Because that is what you have to do. I have meal planned, weighed and measured my food, tracked everything, and started more activity. I will not let my manipulative brain win this time. I have come too far to stop now. I will not give up and I will NEVER go back to the girl who couldn’t live the life she wanted.

@NikkiPen Updated!

@BoomqueenI'm so sorry to hear about that. I will have to look into something that might boost my self esteem. @FitBeth Thank you! I'm glad I could inspire you!

@Banded2003NYC Thank you! I'm trying to just move on! @Sassy Sleeve Thank you! I am also glad I caught myself before it got worse! @rainyannThank you! @GrrlAnnWell my Bariatric surgeon at the beginning asked me what my goal was and I said 200 and they said it was doable and that was the goal they said I could have. MY plastic surgeon wants me to lose at least 30-35 more pounds before I start maintaining. He said if I don't lose that he would be disapointed because I've already come so far. I really just want to get to a size 10. I was able to buy a size 12 shirt yesterday which was super exciting. My pant size is still 14 or 16. Good luck to you though! Don't let your doctor limit you! @hmills653Thank you so much! @Sosewsue61Thank you! I'm honestly not sure what exactly I'm afraid of. I guess I'm afraid I don't know what I will be like and what my life will be like without the restriction of weight. I have used it a bit like a crutch and I no longer have it. @Joann454 exactly like that @herewegoJThank you so much! I will look into more support groups. I go to one a month but maybe more would help. @shan0520 Aww thank you!

@NikkiPen Congrats! You've beaten your challenge goal! Would you like to set a new goal for next week or just keep it the same?

@cat3818I can relate. I often just kind of walk around amazed that this is my life now. I can't believe I have gotten to this size. It's hard for my mind to catch up. @Dimples58Thank you!! @CoCo0273Thank you! I also have Bipolar and depression. It is hard! I feel like it got worse for a bit a few months after surgery but it has leveled back out again thankfully. Congrats on your surgery, good luck to you!