plain

The Brass Monkey? That funky monkey?

She never said she was going to sleep.

That's why I have "DNR" tattooed on my fivehead.

Yep, I'm the resident moron. Only I prefer the term "awesome". Mom told me they mean the same thing. Heehee...Punny.

PJTP: I'm trying to titrate a CPAP for an octogenarian. If it were me in her shoes, I think I'd stick with what got me through 81 years.....but that's just me.

Was it his glamorous and sexy role in The Cell?

You should be ok unless you're pregnant.

and dust.....Damn. Ladies like pearl necklaces, not sandblasting.

You mean The Monkey is turned on by pearl necklaces? Well step into this dark alley here, heh heh heh....

I believe it was Slim. Should I post those shots on facebook? Nothing else, just odd.

You may be doing the pigs a disservice with that comparison

Oh. In that case, It NEVER happens to me.

Another squatter break the glass coffee table? Happens to me ALL the time.

Er....I hope you know where the stain came from... I heard the monkey can eat a banana without using her hands? I'm sure we all meant it in the sweetest way, dear.

Brittle???

What did y'all bet on?

Yeah, one time I had to use some o' that hemopiod cream. I think it was "Prep H" or something?

Well I'm the one sitting here in my assless "Aquaman" costume....who do think gets the enema?!? And I always insist on the "x-tra large" nozzle.

I've never heard an act of female self-gratification called "petting your possum", but whatever..... Um, I don't believe it, Liar McFibby. They = "the Man" Naked pictures make everything better. BTW, do you like the way I quoted the above? Makes it look like TPG was the one taking the naked pics. You're welcome, pool girl. Link, por favor. Yeah, they'll end up in MY album. I collect these pictures to help.....well, the reason I collect them isn't really important. Beth? Not possible. Her style is sooooo gentle. Here, take the conversation I cut and pasted between Beth and a newb: Newb - Hey, how long was everybody on liquids following surgery? Beth - Look f*cktard, quit being so f*cking stoopid and wasting my f*cking time. By the way, I had a quick question. If I pureed a pan of lasagna and then administered it via an enema, could it hurt my band? Could it hurt my marriage?

Just the ol' tried and true: Keep a glass of Water around you, no matter where you are, and constantly sip on it. Keep sipping tiny sips, even if you don't feel thirsty. At least that's what worked for me.

That's awesome, Claudia. Sounds like you're on your way! Good luck!

Sounds like you're doing great Kristi. I know the whole liquid / mushie phase thing is difficult, but it's important for your stomach to be still and healing, not digesting. Hang in there, you can do it!

plain = unadorned, no frills, regular, uninteresting, common.

BJean, you may be the most literal person in this debate. My point was that all this power you're so keen on passing now will eventually be in the hands of another president. Maybe even one you distrust. I saw today that there's a provision in the house bill that would the government direct access to your bank account. You comfortable with that? Sheesh. Did you know there's a popular drinking game on LBT where the players have to take a shot everytime you bash / blame Bush. Nobody has lasted more than 3 posts before passing out. If you really want to play a "numbers game", take a look at OVERALL health care stats. Democrats love to cherry pick that infant mortality rate stat, but are strangely quiet when it comes to cancer survival rates, or transplantations. It's statements like this that that make you look bitter. Sure, we have pretty good care here. The most fabulous in the word? Probably not. I hate that your daughter had some kind of issue with Texarkana, Texas in the 70's, but c'mon.......that was only 39 years ago. Sheesh. Ok, I'll work on that. Will you reply to the facts or make some weird statements about where I live? Maybe you could point out how unpatriotic I am, or maybe as a fat man, how I'm contributing to America's healthcare costs? What specifically have I not answered to your liking? Ask again and I will answer. On a side note, when I read your posts, a lot of what you say comes off as rhetorical questions....so maybe that's why I skipped a question? Anywho, just ask. *heavy sigh*

Can somebody provide a link to this much-touted blended pasta thread? I feel like I'm missing out.