theantichick

There's a lot of misinformation out there about the surgery. From the "it's the easy way out" (see link in my signature for my response to that) to "it doesn't work, everyone regains" to "it's so dangerous". Most people are just misinformed. I know the only real concerns any of my friends and family had were because they'd personally known someone who had died and it was attributed to the surgery (bypass for most cases) but it was always years after the fact, which means there were other things going on than just the surgery. And it was years ago, and a different surgery. None of those people were unsupportive, just concerned. Once I explained the current science and risk factors, they realized I'd done my homework and were very supportive. My response is always based on how invested I am in the relationship with that person. If it's someone I work or interact with a lot and care about the relationship, I educate them about the surgery and the scientific evidence and the true risk factors. If it's not a close friend or family member, I don't go into personal health details, but if it is I explain why my particular case points to this surgery. If they still don't support me, I just stop discussing it with them. If they bring it up, I change the subject. If it's not someone I am close to or care about, I just tell them that they might want to look into the current research because it doesn't sound like their information is up to date. And then walk away. LOL.

I consider myself lucky that my insurance covered it with a local surgeon. But I'd have done the MX route if I'd needed to. What I would have done if that had been the case was meet with my PCP and see if she was comfortable doing followup care/testing. If she wasn't, I'd have asked her for a referral to a gastroenterologist and met with that specialist and explained the situation and gotten their agreement to do the followup. A lot of surgeons don't like to do followup for another surgeon but I think when you are proactive and get things arranged in advance it tends to go better. Most of the followup, even with minor complications, is going to be something a PCP can handle if they're willing. Only a serious complication would need a surgeon, and then most experienced gastroenterologists would be capable.

Nutrasweet is a huge migraine trigger for me, so I struggle with the whole sugar-free thing. I have to find options that have splenda or monk fruit because I'm one of the people who gets the wierd after taste with stevia, or things that come with no sweeteners added and then I add monk fruit because even Splenda sometimes gives me a metallic aftertaste. Because I can't do a ketogenic diet, I don't have a particular carb limit, I've gotten to where I will take a small bit of something with a natural sugar if I need to before I'll get a sugar-free something. I do try to avoid refined sugars where I can. Monk fruit has been the best sweetener for me personally, but it's not one that's used in prepared foods much so I am trying to learn how to make things like Jello and pudding from scratch.

For me, the pre-op diet was 100 times harder than anything post op. And I didn't have to do a full liquid diet. I had to do 3-4 Protein shakes a day with one "healthy meal". It was *SO* hard, I didn't think I'd get through the 2 weeks, seriously. Some people say if you can't get through the pre-op without cheating you shouldn't do the surgery. I'm not sure about that. Before the surgery, you have all that stomach tissue flooding your body with hunger hormones and all the things that have driven you to eat for all the years that have gotten you to the place you're at. After the surgery, that tissue is cut out, and those hormones are GONE. I know it doesn't happen this way for everyone, but for me and a lot of people, the hunger drive is just GONE after surgery. For 2 months after surgery I literally had to set a reminder on my phone to eat and drink. Now 4 months out I have days where I get hungry, but most days I still have to remember to eat. So I personally don't think struggling pre-op is an indicator that you can't do it post-op. Now, that's not to say I advocate cheating. The evidence is unclear about the benefits of the pre-op diet. The surgeons that require one say that it reduces the size of the liver. The liver has to be lifted out of the way for the surgeon to be able to do the laparoscopic surgery. If your liver is too large, they either have to convert to an open surgery (HUGE incision in your belly, MUCH longer recovery, MUCH higher chance of complications) or they have to cancel it and try again after some radical diet changes to reduce the liver. So if those surgeons are right, cheating on the pre-op diet can increase the chances of complications and such with the surgery. For me, my doc didn't see any evidence of enlarged liver, and said in her experience without evidence of an abnormal liver the pre-op diet just didn't make that much difference, so she didn't have as strict of one. But my medical case is not your medical case, and my doc isn't your doc. It's important to follow your doc's instructions. If you're struggling so hard you just can't, then call your doc's team and see what they advise. I've seen people's stories here that when they called and talked to their team about their struggles, the team said they could add salads or other specific foods that wouldn't compromise the pre-op diet but would help them get through. I think too often people struggle so hard with things the doc says and fail and are too afraid to call the team. That's what they're there for. You won't be the first person to struggle seriously with the pre-op diet. They should have some advice or options or tools to help you. Good luck, and if nothing else, remember that this is a short period of time, just get through it as best you can, because it DOES GET BETTER.

I luckily didn't have to do a full liquid diet, but it was liquid plus one "healthy" meal a day. I found that the headaches were from dehydration combined with caffeine withdrawal. Taking some advil or excedrin and trying to double my Water intake helped. For me, the pre-op diet was 100 times harder than anything post-op, so just hang in there and do the best you can, and plow through.

For me it's always when I eat/drink too fast or too much. I don't know physically why it happens after surgery, but I know it has to do with the phrenic nerve. So I suspect that it's a sensitivity thing, and that you eventually get over it. But that's an educated guess.

I am not vegetarian, but I was raised as one for religious reasons. As such, I grew up eating commercial meat replacements (TVP). One thing I found in the first few weeks after I was released to full diet is that meat sat VERY heavy in my sleeve, but TVP was VERY well tolerated. Some of the options are very high in fat and sodium, but there are some healthier options. And of course, on a high Protein low carb plan fat isn't an issue as long as it's healthy fats. So definitely try lots of different protein sources. Beans and lentils worked well for me from puree phase on. And if you're lacto-ovo of course cheese and eggs are good protein sources. My surgeon warned me that some people don't tolerate eggs right off the bat even though they're typically listed in the puree/soft foods lists, and I was one of those people. I didn't tolerate eggs well until I was several weeks into full diet. But now they're no problem. So even if something doesn't sit well right off the bat, don't write it off completely until you try it again later. Bottom line, it may be a bit more challenging to do a high protein diet with no meat sources, but it's definitely do-able. If you've been eating that way for a while already you already know about how to get a complete protein and that's the biggest challenge in learning to do vegetarian/vegan. Lacto-ovo is easier than complete vege/an but even that's doable if needed for whatever reason. Good luck!!

I don't have much else to add to the other's great comments, except that I'm an RN so I've seen the "behind the curtain" of surgery and recovery. That can either give you a lot of confidence in healthcare or scare the pants off of you. My experience is that it gives me a lot of confidence. Even though I've run across a few (very few, thank goodness) complete idiots in my career, healthcare has a lot of checks and balances so the rare idiot doesn't get a chance to cause a real problem for a patient. And surgery has more checks and balances and better-trained and more experienced personnel than most other areas of healthcare. You really can rest assured that you will be monitored continuously during surgery and recovery and they are prepared to handle anything that comes up.

I agree with all the other comments here. It really doesn't sound like she was being catty or intentionally trying to out you. So whether you go to her superior or not depends on how much fallout you want for her. I think you handled it very well. She absolutely should not have said that, an HR person needs to have a FULL understanding of how sensitive EVERY piece of information they are privy to is. So if you feel comfortable talking to her, and don't want to cause her a rash of crap, I would go to her privately and say something like, "I appreciate your apology, and don't want to cause trouble for you, I just want to make sure you understand how much trouble you could have caused for the company, and how every single piece of information you are privy to in HR is sensitive and confidential and how careful you have to be about discussing it in front of anyone." If of course you ever see indication of it happening again with anyone else, I would make sure her superiors know about it as well as this incident at that time. If you haven't reported this incident they won't be able to make it part of a documented action plan, but they will at least have the knowledge that it's part of a pattern that she's been made aware of. Of course, this is serious enough that you would be completely justified in going to her supervisor if you chose as well, they would need to have it documented in the event it became a pattern and they needed to take action. This kind of thing exposes a company to some very expensive legal and regulatory actions.

Absolutely. I started therapy even before I decided for sure on the surgery because of some odd food issues I have, and that's segued into a whole ton of emotional issues that have been under the surface for me for my whole life. Food just doesn't work as an emotional bandaid anymore, so I have to either find a new crutch or fix the wounds for real this time. It's healthier to fix the wounds. Good for you for figuring it out, lots of people just find a new crutch/addiction to mask it or find a way to eat around their surgery and put the weight back on. If you can, find a therapist and get to work. If that's just not possible for you, start reading, there's tons of self help books that can get you started on dealing with your issues. I'm not a counselor but I have an extensive library including assigned reading from my therapists over the years and can make a few recommendations if you want to PM me.

Yeah. I personally can't do ketosis, as it make me incredibly ill for longer than I've been able to muscle through (no pun intended) to see how long it lasts. I've determined I'm just one of those people who doesn't function well on it. I personally tend to think it's not a good long-term eating plan, just because it's a compensatory metabolic system in the body and logically it doesn't seem wise to function in a compensatory system for long, but there seems to be a good deal of evidence that it can benefit at least some people long term. So I try not to bash it. But one thing that seems to be misunderstood by a lot of people practicing it is that a ketogenic diet is necessarily high in fat. I see a lot of people on this board who are trying to eat VERY low carb and at the same time eat VERY low fat. Of the three macro nutrients, you can only severely restrict one of them at a time with impunity. It makes sense to be careful about the type of fats you're ingesting of course, but the fats have to increase if you're restricting the carbs. It worries me if there are nutritionists and/or surgeons out there preaching this dual restriction because it's harmful.

I am a serious planner and office supply addict/freak. I loved the idea of the Erin Condren but also found it super bulky. What I have fallen in love with is the Bullet Journal concept. There's tons of ideas/layouts on Pinterest, as well as several bloggers out there to follow to figure out how to do it. I personally don't get into all of the drawing and washi tape and embellishments, but it's open to all of that if it's your thing. What I love is that I can find the layout that works for me, and change it day to day or week to week as I need. Plus I can add in lists and content sections as I need them. I currently have my work journal in a Moleskine and my personal journal in a Leuchterm (sp?) and I think I prefer the Leuchterm one because the paper's a little thicker, and the pages come pre-numbered. They're a little pricier than the Moleskine, but you can sometimes find them on sale on Amazon for reasonable, and they're still not as spendy as the Condrens. If I hadn't started the BuJo, I'd have likely gone back to a ring binder Franklin planner style setup.

My sister had the surgery several years ago, and is super supportive. In her own way. She's 19 years older than me, and even though I'm an RN she considers herself the expert in everything and constantly lectures me about the right way to do things and how things work, even when she doesn't really understand it herself. I just smile and nod. We did our family Christmas thing yesterday, so that was fun. But I'm down 66# and people really noticed, so that was cool. Another 60# or so to go! Sis was sure to tell me all about the stall I will have at 5 months that will certainly drive me crazy. I'm pretty sure her stall at 5 months had more to do with her drinking sugared sodas once she could stand carbonation than anything else, but what do I know? You stay strong, and do your thing. Let her do her thing, and try to let her competitive nonsense roll off your back. You'll get to your goal in your own time. This is for you, not her.

I've gotten a lot of advice to go gluten free, omit nightshades, go paleo, or any number of dietary changes to "fix" my auto-immune. Have any of you had this advice, and if you followed it, did it actually change anything with your condition? I have generally thought there would likely be some improvement, but that it's not likely that diet alone could fix an auto-immune condition. But we're struggling to get to where we're actually cooking most of our meals instead of fast food or eating out, so I think we have to be realistic on the changes we can make until we get back to "real" food.

I was bouncing it off my kiddo who's in a sports nutrition program and she says even if you're trying to stay in ketosis you should be getting more carbs in, pushing that upper limit for ketosis, so about 40 to 45g. At a minimum 100g Protein, and calories up in the 1200 to 1400 to maintain the kind of activity you've been describing. You need some deficit for weight loss but too much deficit is detrimental. Her main sports nutrition instructor doesn't approve of ketosis plans, but if that's what your team is saying you'll need to make up the calorie difference with fat and protein. sent from mobile device

It's so frustrating for me... I used to be very active. I was always heavy, but active and heavy. I used to belly dance, and when I was younger I played all kinds of sports. With belly dance, I had good core muscle strength and control. Now, it's been so many years since I've done anything, the slightest exertion makes me out of breath, and I've already talked about my heart rate going crazy. My trainer asks me to do simple crunches or sixes and I can't even do them because my core is so soft now. And because of the auto-immune we're having to start SO SLOWLY it barely feels like we're doing anything but if we push it more, my whole body flares up like I've got the flu and it takes me days to recover. And right now I haven't been to the gym in almost 3 weeks because I've been migraining almost non-stop. (Just started back on preventative meds, hoping to break the cycle.) ARGH. I won't give up. I know I have ONE chance to get this right, and I will NOT give in, but GOSH it's frustrating as heck.

Dunno. If someone isn't trying to force their beliefs onto me, I tend to gloss over it. It's no skin off my nose.

Early on, meat did NOT sit well in my sleeve, even when it was moist and shredded. I grew up vegetarian so vegetable Protein (TVP) was something I was already used to. I ordered some meat substitute products I was familiar with off of Amazon and found that they actually sat VERY well on my sleeve (Loma Linda canned products). Now everything but steak sits pretty well, but some days my sleeve is being a little tetchy and I'll still break out a Loma Linda Big Frank instead because I know it will be well tolerated. Play around with different protein sources and find out what your sleeve likes.

I even found some ziploc tubes on Amazon and froze Syntrax nectar Protein drinks (I like roadside lemoade) so they were ice pop style, and sucked on those the first couple of weeks post-op to try and increase both fluids and protein. The ice pops were easier to get down than liquid Water at that point. It seemed like I was sipping non-stop through the day and only getting a few ounces in, but little by little I was able to get more and more down and it got better. Just hang in there and keep at it!!

I would think since you had a full workup, that it's just due to not being in optimal cardio shape. I haven't started looking at recovery stats yet, because I'm still focused on how it takes virtually nothing for my heart rate to jump up. My resting rate is in the 90's and walking from my car into the building from the parking lot will jump it up to 150. I go into high training rates almost immediately standing up and walking a few feet. I've had a stress test recently, so my heart is fine. It's my cardio shape that's in the toilet. So I'm trying to get more cardio workouts in and get my endurance back. I've seen a slight improvement with the one workout a week I've been managing, so I know if I can actually manage to get several a week in, I'll see improvements rather quickly. Hiking at altitude is a lot more stress on the old ticker than cardio at the gym. So it makes sense that it would take more out of you. And the dehydration also makes sense. You'll probably want to ramp up with some HIIT if you want to start doing more mountain hiking. Or start with shorter mountain hikes and increase your endurance more slowly.

What @@BigViffer Said!! Popsicles, Jello (if ok'd by your surgeon, of course), ice chips... anything you can do to get fluids in, DO IT. Fluids are more important even than Protein right now, and calories flat out don't matter at this point. You have to stay hydrated or you'll end up in the ER with someone fishing for a vein for an IV. (Which is super hard when you're dehydrated, take it from a former ER nurse!)

I hadn't thought that far ahead, frankly. I guess I always think of them palms out. I'd be happy to be able to do it either way.

It definitely gets easier, and your appetite will definitely come back. I'm about 4 months out at this point, and it varies from day to day. I'll have several days in a row where I have to have reminders to eat, but then I have no problems actually eating. Then I'll have a day or two where I'm constantly hungry. It's a cycle, really. But by about week 3 I could eat about 1/4 cup of food with no issues. Now I can eat 1/2 cup of most things with no problems, and sometimes it creeps toward a cup if it's not too dense.

I should make that a goal. I have never been able to do one...even when I was serving in the USAF! Or even as a kid in PE. Never! My arms are my weakness. I can barely throw! Good goal. Funny thing is my trainer says most of the guys who do them for Crossfit and stuff aren't doing "real" pull-ups, they're doing something called "kipping" where they throw themselves up with their hips and it's a "cheat" move. I've also never been able to do a pull-up, for the fitness tests I had to do the straight arm hang because I couldn't pull myself up even a bit. They have a machine at the gym that counter-balances percentages of your body weight with the weight stack that he says we will be able to start with down the line a bit, and start working up to it.

Try pulling part of your hair up like you're going to do a half-up pony tail, and put the strap on, so the top half of your hair covers the strap (not sure if that makes sense but hopefully a little). When my hair is short, that helps the strap not slide around. And keep trying every night, even if you know you're going to pull the thing off in frustrating in the wee hours. You'll usually find that the time you stay asleep with it gets longer each night until one night you wake up with your alarm and realize you slept all night with it... kinda like when you have a newborn. LOL.