bandayed

Maybe this is naive, but is there a 3rd party -- maybe a relative or close friend that could go along with your son to visit his Dad? That way he can have the visit without the Mom intereaction yet it is still supervised until a more formal arrangement is made............Even if your husband is doing the right things, trust your gut -- your son is a child and needs you !

I guess weighing yourself depends on your personality. I now weigh myself every AM and I get ticked if I've gained.5 lb or something. I also have a digital so these tingy tenths of pounds have started driving me crazy. I was never obsessive about it before, but working so hard makes me expect results! I have been thinking though of putting the scale in the closet and taking it out 1X week or so rather than torturing myself daily especially since these tiny variations coiuld be in what I'm wearing, whether I've been to the bathroom, and if I had my coffee yet! The pushing the envelope thing I can totally relate to. I was banded in Oct and I am just starting now to stop "testing" my band. If I don't absolutely need to eat something, I don't -- easy as that. I used to go as far as I could, now I stop as soon as I can. I think that it is a really hard lesson for overeaters and emotional eaters to learn.........but the one the band can ultimately help us learn!

Hey Michelle -- not sure where you live, but I liked the photographer at my sister in laws wedding last spring -- he was good and not cheesy. She go hi for 6 hours and all the proofs -- everything else was extra and I think she paid him $1600.00. This is in MA. It is expensive b/c the reprints are murderously high (hmmm got a scanner?) WHO SAID THAT!?!? But the photos of your wedding are worth it. Don't count on the disposable cameras on the tables to capture the reception either -- if you have a night wedding they all just take a bunch of black background with overexposed faces! Enjoy the day -- when is it?

Sleepyjean...periods definately change with weight changes. The last 30 lbs I gained before my band made a definate difference in the heaviness of my flow. I have had my period 5X in the last 2 or 3 months since being banded and beginning to lose weight, and I am convinced that it is my body "cleaning out" from the heavier weight and therefore higher hormone levels. I agree with everyone above though, you need to go to the Dr and have a PAP etc. It isn't about sex -- it's a part of your body you need to keep healthy. You get all your shots, right? And you take care of your emotions with your counselor, right? Time to check out the plumbing too!

Congrats on your new band, and welcome tot he land of the bandsters...............

You're right -- recovery greatly varies. I was one of the wimpier ones I guess. I was at only 50% (or less) of capacity for 2 weeks. I was just exhausted. Everyday I napped. In between I could go & do things, but I just got wiped out. I also needed pain medication in this time (maybe that's why I was sleepy ). Did I mention I gave up all caffeine at the same time!?!? I was only sick/in bed for a day or so though....just be careful not to over do it during recovery. As far as a band tip/the best thing I know about, it is something I am just realizing now. I've only been banded a couple of months, but all of a sudden I am learning something about my PERCEPTION of the band. It's hard to explain but it involves how I think of the band. I am realizing that the band is on MY SIDE. Up til now I have been kind of testing it to see what it will allow me to do -- how MUCH I can eat, WHAT I can eat it and HOW FAST....now I realize that knowing those limitations is good, but it is not the purpose of the band to see how far it will let you go. I guess what I'm trying to say is listen very closely to your body & your band and it will work better for you than if you keep trying to push the boundaries. It all started to fall into place when I was telling my Dr that I thought I could eat more than I should be able to. I can eat like 2 cups of food at a time. He said: well, don't do that. He is a very nice man, it sounds kind of harsh here, but it helped me realize that I would probably be sated after 1C so why was I eating the 2nd cup -- just 'cuz I could! It helped me start listening to my body and my stomach hunger rather than my head hunger........ Good luck on your journey, you will get alot of great info here at LBT -- stick around!

It sounds as though you two have been through alot. Hang in there -- you are obviously a very strong woman and your marriage sounds full of love. The two of you can get by this together.......where there's a will there's a way.

Thanks Randy -- knew they were here SOMEWHERE!

Hi newme -- there is a list of lingo somewhere, but I jsut went looking fo it and couldn't find it. Here's a couple: PB Productive Burping (revisiting your food) DH/DW Dear Husband or wife IMHO In My Humble Opinion RNY Roux en Y (Gastric Bypass) LOL Laugh Out Loud OMG Oh My God NSV Non scale Victory LBT This website -- Lapband Talk I'm sure there are others, but that should get you started -- anyone know where that ling list went?

Ok -- I have posted all over LBT about maybe being too tight and possibly needing an unfill. Then I read your post and it rang a bell for me. Last night I tried a warm drink prior to dinner and then eating past the first few bites that induced the sliming. I spit out the slime and then found that if I kept going, the additional food supressed the PBing! I ate dinner! Meatloaf & mashed potatoes -- even a tiny bit of corn! What is it with those first few bites??? I realize this is only one meal, but will try the same method today. If it works, I am SOOOO glad I didn't seek and unfill! Thanks for posting!

Have you tried visiting one of the Drs your family uses? Maybe they would be more receptive to the idea of weight loss surgeries knowing your family history and since they obviously supported it for others in your clan. For some, the diet exercise route is not enough and I urge you to seek a physician that will refer you. It's your body and if you are willing to use this tool (the band) to help you, you have a right to. Your Dr is ignorant for believing it to be the easy way out seems s/he is prejudiced against the surgeries for labelling the easy way out. Having a band is a lifelong commitment and takes diligence and hard work to use properly. It is a tool to help you, not a solution in and of itself. Good luck finding a better Doc!

Happy New Year to everyone! I guess those old new years resolutions to lose 20 , 30, 100 pounds are being put to the test by all us bandsters.......congrats to you all for taking control of your weight! I wish everyone continued success in 2006!

I have had a hard time ever since I got my fill a few weeks ago. It was tiny, but I had restriction originally. I just thought I needed more restriction b/c I was not sure I should have been able to eat as much as I was. Now though, I have a hard time with anything that is not blended or liquid. I am back on protein shakes, and watching my nutrition, so my question is -- is it bad to be over filled? Can it lead to erosion quicker, or esophagus problems? I just don't want to abuse the band or my digestive system anymore! Shoud I get unfilled?

That's funny Lianna -- I talked to my surgeon today and got basically the same advice. He said if I can't eat hard foods -- don't. He said things like ham, chicken, beef are slow to digest and hard to chew enough to pass through a properly restricted band. He said if I could eat oatmeal, cottage cheese, well cooked veggies etc that I was not really over filled. He offered to unfill me but added I would probably regret it within a few weeks....I've decided to do the soft foods for now and if I can't handle it after another week to go for a partial unfill. I need to better examine WHAT I am eating rather than HOW I am eating it I guess. Thank you all for your advice!

You have every right to feel the way you do -- that all sux! Do what you can do for you -- try to take hole of the grazing, see if you can get a fill and tell your hubby he's sending you for an mani/pedi next week since he didn't have time to pick you up anything It's hard to give alot when you are feeling like you need something. You are a strong woman to be able to do it!

I spoke to my Dr today and he said he would take some of my fill out if I thought I couldn't eat at all, but where I can do most mushies, he thinks I might just be slow on digesting meats etc and to just lay off them a couple of days and see if it gets better. If not he will unfill next week. He said my fill was small and is surprised I am having such problems so he wants me to really try to work with the fill -- whatever that means! He thinks that within a week or so I will better be able to tolerate harder foods -- although he did not say why........I was just reading another thread about sliming as a response to the first few bites of food. This is how mine starts and then progresses to PBing. Maybe I just have to get past that and then try to eat after a few minutes. Many have advised a warm drink prior to meals. Maybe I will try that tonight too....thanks for all your replies............

I am wondering if being over filled could lead to quicker erosion??? I got a tiny fill a few weeks ago and since then have had a very hard time with anything that is not liquid. I am wondering if keeping this level of restriction is harmful at all. I am going to start again with the protein shakes to make sure I am getting enough protein, but if I can deal with liquids only, is it bad to maybe be over filled? I figure it will loosen as I loose weight so it's semi temporary right?

Hey -- my DH is 5 years younger -- what's the big deal with 8 -- run back there if he was cute! Congrats to you!

I can feel my port, and so can my friend. We have both only lost less than 1/2 our weight so I think it may stick out when all is said and done. Did your Dr say this was normal? I hate it when I bump it on the counter sometimes or something -- it hurts!

Your list is the best! Congrats on your loss! Love the personal grooming bit --LOL!

no one has any advice for me??? C'mon guys I know you're out there...............

I thought the same thing on Christmas morning I had lost an even 40 and said that's the best gift of all! Congrats to you!

My swallow was the next morning and actually showed that I was passing the liquid very slowly so they kept me in for an extra day to make sure I wasn't going to vomit back everything (showing that I was too tight). I have had good restriction from the beginning though so I just think it was tight going through......

Are you finding that you have the phantom band symptoms, or have you just been working your learned eating habits from when your band was in? Either way that is great! Keep it up!

Great news! Good luck with your surgery! I have a great Hubby but he could never hack to post op diet so cut the guy some slack -- just willing to try it is farther than most "others" would do -- you're lucky!