rking

I was sleeved four months ago and have lost 45 pounds, you have lost 60

i was very similar to you i think. i knew when i set my mind to something, it is over i ate whatever the heck i wanted to eat right before my pre op liquid diet started (which i was deathly afraid of). i knew i would be doing liquids and then Clear Liquids 2 weeks post op and i didnt feel that bad food was going to hurt anything at that point. and guess what!!!! i am 4 months post op and have lost 45 pounds. eating all that before pre op did not kill my weight loss....which i knew it would not. i do have Pasta and bread occasionally. my doc said that carbonated drinks could stretch the sleeve so i have not had a coke since right before my pre op diet. hell, i survived that too! trust me when i say i was a cokeaholic. i lived them. it was my personal drug of choice first thing in the morning. every now and then i really, really want one and feel like i have to call my AA sponsor hahaha. i dont have an AA sponsor, but i feel like i know what it would feel like. i just tell myself, NO! and go on. cokes are the one thing i will not have again in my life. i still taste the occasional dessert. i will not do without any food the rest of my life that i want. i know it is alright to have something every once in a while. it is really weird how my body and mind just took to this whole new way of eating. it just comes naturally. i eat my Protein first, then if i am even the least bit hungry, i have a bite or two of veggies. my Protein normally fills me up. actually, i have to push myself to finish my 3 or 4 ounces of meat that i have because i have to get 100 g of protein a day.
i am sorry your family does not support you. you can find tons of support here. these people here have been a life saver to me. i learned more from here than anywhere. you are not going to fail at this, like i said, i think you and i are similar. you do not have to stop having cokes until you start your pre op diet. should you stop now? yes. but life will go on if you don't. just make up your mind to do what you are supposed to do once the pre op diet starts. i found following the new found diet, post surgery, was really pretty darn easy. it does not bother me in the least. even my husband, who never compliments me, says how impressed he is that i have actually following directions!
you can do this and you WILL do this!!!!!!! i cannot wait to hear back from you after surgery :)

well isnt this special....... @@Dub, i love your honesty! and, as always, your sense of humor. i don't know if you have ever posted anything that did not make me laugh. you have such perfect words!!!

I think it's not at all unusual to want a "Last Supper"/food funeral...that said, I think they should be resisted if at all possible. The pre-op period (3-6 months of medically supervised diet most of us have) is the time to learn new eating habits, not an opportunity to gorge on whatever made us obese in the first place.
That said, I'd be lying if I said chocolate donuts didn't call my name very often. I resist by telling myself getting off the carbs and sweets NOW can only help later when I'm sleeved.

I did. Big salads. bread. Desserts. I bid them a fond farewell. I have no regrets. Sure I will have salads and maybe even bread if I have the need, but not in mass quantities. I'm really glad I had the surgery. I'm down 56pounds in 4 months. Funerals worked for me. Better the food than me having a funeral.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

As I was approaching my surgery date I did have a few food funerals. Up until two weeks prior to surgery it was my belief that I would be having gastric bypass.
There were specifics about my size, height and BMI at that point that had my surgeon encouraging me in the strongest possible way to have a sleeve instead. I took his advice and chose the sleeve at that point. He explained that in time....once I hit maintenance living that any foods and most drinks would be.....or could be, in moderation, on my personal menu. I realized that there was no need to say goodbye forever to carbs and such....but to simply follow his eating plan and work through the various stages.
I have found as I near my 5th month that I have zero cravings for foods. Don't get me wrong....I immensely enjoy the flavors and smells of good food, it's just that I'm very content being a small eating carnivore. Tasty grilled Proteins in 1/2 cup sized meals are savored and that is plenty and satisfies me.

My comments were based on my own experiences. The OP was being very rude with his lashing out and made a sweeping comment that I chose not let stand, thusly I replied.
I could have simply been a dick and called his comment total b.s.
Instead, I chose to talk to the young bro. I've lived a little longer than he has and hope that he can benefit from my mistakes.
For the life of me I can't even understand why people get so wrapped around the axle over subjects and postings.
There are some really fine people on here that I truly enjoy communicating with.......and I value their input.......regardless of where the thread originates. Then there are some I simply prefer to ignore and move on past.

ok, ok, ok......... let's be done with all this negativity. @bsancvhez2016, this really is a very, very encouraging and helpful site. you will find lots of support here and i hope you continue to come back. tons of extremely wonderful people here.
i feel completely comfortable asking anything here and am prepared for honest answers. i feel you have a very legitimate question/concern and hope you get the answers you need.
take care and good luck.

ok, ok, ok......... let's be done with all this negativity. @bsancvhez2016, this really is a very, very encouraging and helpful site. you will find lots of support here and i hope you continue to come back. tons of extremely wonderful people here.
i feel completely comfortable asking anything here and am prepared for honest answers. i feel you have a very legitimate question/concern and hope you get the answers you need.
take care and good luck.

Here's a picture of some "junk".

well isnt this special....... @@Dub, i love your honesty! and, as always, your sense of humor. i don't know if you have ever posted anything that did not make me laugh. you have such perfect words!!!

I don't visit here that often anymore as these types of exchanges have discouraged me from this site. But I thought I would pop in here with a history lesson.
Shortly after the Male/Female rooms were created, there were a few posts in the powder Room regarding breast size post surgery as well as questions regarding drooping labia. A few guys posted with some responses not appreciated by some readers yet others found humorous. Just like this thread, some ladies said it was good to read the male perspective while others lambasted the males as not having a brain as this was obviously a question for females. It was then requested the genders only post in their room. There have been problems with having the posts in the sidebar or when on a mobile device going to the recent posts and not realizing where the post was made, but the problems continued, as they obviously still do regardless of the attempts by the developers to put "safeguards" in place.
As I have often posted, it doesn't take too much intelligence to guess when a topic "may" be in one of these rooms. When you read a post about penis size or menstruation post surgery, what are the chances it is posted in a gender specific room? Even it isn't, check if the OP is new and contact and maybe report the post as being better suited in one of these rooms.
It is funny how easy it is to slip back into Middle School mode, no matter our current age. Ladies, unless you want men making comments regarding vaginal dryness post surgery (I have lots of information on that) in the powder Room, please don't add any comments to any posts in the Men's Room. Men, if you are wanting comments from the ladies, make your post in a General forum. If you realize after you have posted to one of these forums, go back and edit your post, removing your comments and apologizing for not noticing the forum.
Bottom line, let's use our heads and be respectful of each other. We don't know each other's stories our backgrounds. Don't make assumptions and love yourself and others.
As to the OP, @@Proud2BMe echos my experience.

I too, am swimming in the cesspool that is online dating.
The worst I think was a guy that disappeared in the middle of a conversation. In the middle. Boom.
I just tell myself I dodged a bullet.

How annoying. I guess people fade away because until you meet it is all just a fantasy. I suspect they are not genuine - either married or they don't look anything like they said or some other reason they really never planned to meet. Or maybe the distance is an issue for them, but they enjoyed the chatting until it "got real"
During my convelescence I watched alot of Netflix, including Catfished by MTV. people who make false identities just for ego boosts and build these online relationships with no intentions of meeting or becoming real (because it's all based on lies) and maybe that has biased me into thinking this is why they disappeared when you are ready to meet.
All that dang true crime stuff has made me think about danger too, sheesh, but besides taking reasonable precautions you do have to incur some risk in meeting new people.
I can't wait until the weather and my health improve...I am going a little stircrazy!

I know there are a bunch of us doing online dating.
I started talking to this guy who lives in Portland which is 4 hours away from where I live. We talked every day for 2 weeks, sometimes morning and evening. This is really against the rule I have for myself, which is not to waste a lot of my time on the phone with guys I've found online.
This guy was different though. He was funny, and smart. I decided I wanted to meet him and my son lives in Portland, so I decided to visit my son and DIL. Right up until the day before I was ready to go, we were in contact and he was all for us meeting. All of a sudden, he doesn't text back and the phone goes straight to VM.
Being the smart cookie that I am, I arranged to meet some other guys while I'm here. I found guys whom I normally would not contact since I live so far away. I made sure they like to dance. Out of 4 guys who were writing every day, and all for us meeting, only one has not disappeared on me. Two of them I forced to write back to me when they suddenly stopped answering emails. It pi$$ed me off that they would just take the easy way out. I wrote to them and said if you've changed your mind, you could at least write back and say so. I was disappointed I would not be making a new friend, but life was full of disappointments.
I could understand it if we were in our 20's . But men in their 50's and 60's not having the manners to form an email that said it was not going to work out to get together after all, kinda makes me sick.

This thread should give you the info you want. Lots of encouraging stories re: the bedroom department, including several men saying that they've regained inches downstairs. http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/219760-sex-oh-my-god-sex/
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

@@BSanchez2016
Please considering slowing your roll, my young hombre.
All is well. All is good.
Take a deep breath and relax.
You are at the tipping point........making a big decision about where to head next and what the implications are.
I'm gonna drop some truth on you, boss. You didn't ask for this....but here it is, regardless: Every major decision I've successfully made in life......every good choice.........every single life goal that I've achieved.......has been when I took the advice and was inspired by A WOMAN !!!!!!!
They are called the fairer sex for a reason, buddy. Dudes promote broscience and much of that deals with how to increase the size of our toolage and whatnot. It's true. We all wanna be bigger, faster, stronger...........
It took a woman's encouragement for me to see that faster isn't always better. "Slow down, Pedro....the race isn't over until everyone reaches the finish line".
It took a woman's intuition to help me see the benefits of having wls.
It took a woman's encouragement & feedback to know that I'd done the right thing.......and was doing the right thing.
Women, my friend, make the world go 'round.
Know this. Accept this.....and roll with this. You'll be better for it.
Now....I'm not a preacher. Therefore I'll come down off the pulpit and stfu.
My hope for you is that you relax and get some good and solid advice for the questions in your head at this time. I know they are many and they are wide ranging. It's a very difficult time.....making the decision on wls. I feel for ya, mayne. I was right there just a short time ago.
I truly get the concerns over having good wood. Trust & believe that I get that......but mainly trust & believe that your wood will be gooder once you drop any unneeded pounds you may be toting and embrace your health and fitness. It's all good, bro. The wood is gonna be all good.
Guess what? You'll know when the wood's all good, too......know in the best and most sure way......because a WOMAN will tell you.

ok, ok, ok......... let's be done with all this negativity. @bsancvhez2016, this really is a very, very encouraging and helpful site. you will find lots of support here and i hope you continue to come back. tons of extremely wonderful people here.
i feel completely comfortable asking anything here and am prepared for honest answers. i feel you have a very legitimate question/concern and hope you get the answers you need.
take care and good luck.

well isnt this special....... @@Dub, i love your honesty! and, as always, your sense of humor. i don't know if you have ever posted anything that did not make me laugh. you have such perfect words!!!

What happened to the good old days when one had to show the results of blood work to test gender before posting?
@@BSanchez2016, seriously, I hope that answers to your initial question wouldn't deter you from surgery. Considering your health prospects for the rest of your life against penis appearance or performance, well, there is cosmetic and reconstructive surgery at the end of the rainbow. And tongue depressors with rolls of gauze if necessary.
Easy, that's a joke.
(dumb, stupid technology)

This is foreplay, isn't it?

Thank you everyone for your support and extremely kind words.
The folks here on this sight have been a secret weapon and source of strength, wisdom and absolute truth at a time in my life where these ideals were scarce.
I am a better man for getting to know you all. You have been a sounding board for my thoughts, planning and helped shaped how I felt about my life in general. I am so very grateful for the inspiring people here on Bariatric Pal and their acceptance of my erratic arse. I'm glad I didn't have to walk this walk alone.
The harsh realities of being overweight and the toll this takes on health, relationships and capabilities is all but overwhelming. My friends here helped me to see this and to help me embrace weight loss surgery and with refining a strategy that has been working thus far. You've helped me in much deeper ways, too. You've helped me deal with life during & after some initial success with the weight battle. You helped me when this occurred and I found out that even though I was gaining leverage over the source of my frustrations.....it wasn't a cure-all for eroding relationships and years of living as I had. It is almost as if I've been living in a fog for years....now it's gone and I can see with great clarity. Everything isn't perfect and ideal.
The wls is certainly a little bit of magic.....but it has a limited sway over the rest of my life. You, my friends, have helped me immensely with gaining insight on the areas left uncured by wls.
Thank you so very much.
Once I get further along.....maintain at goal for a while.....deal with the excess skin that's surely going to be there....heal and continue on with my progress......yes....I'd very much like to speak on wls for my bariatric center's briefings and seminars. I'd love to share my story with potential patients who are seeking a tool to get the results they are desiring. It would really make me feel good to answer their questions and perhaps alleviate some of their concerns and fears.
I don't want to sugarcoat anything, but to simply speak on my own experiences.....good, bad & ugly.
I don't begin to know how to thank you.
You were there in the very beginning for me. I was a wreck. I didn't know which way was up.
Your encouragement and insight was....and continues to be.....highly, highly valued and appreciated.
Be proud of what you have personally accomplished and take great pleasure in knowing the guidance you offered was taken to heart by the Leslies, Jessies and Gregs of your world. You were there for us and we are each in better places because of this.
Thank you so very much.

those are the moments in life after WLS that makes everything you go through, all the ups and down, that makes you beam with pride. I had that experience when i was at my lowest... Paula was my Dub. I did the same thing... i walk up to her and ask all those same questions.... she planted my seed of hope. You my friend planted your seed of hope... You probably will never know the emotional impact you have made on this young man. If it works out and he does the WLS... Oh man... the pride.
I have had two such seeds that were planted.... My friend Leslie..Every time she saw me she would say...Chrisy you look great... i would say Leslie.. you can do this i know you can.. Well Last April 1st she had the sleeve done... i was there at the surg with her and know it would be a battle because of the negative family members... but i kept encouraging her... she has to date lost 109lbs. I beam with pride every time i see her... the other day i was going to Walmart and getting out my car... i hear Satan's helper (girls scout) ask, mam would you like to buy some Cookies... and i hear a very familiar voice say... No thank you.. I had bariatric surgery and i don't eat that anymore... It was Leslie... she saw me and said... Did you hear that Chrisy... I said.. I sure did... God i am so proud of you.
My friend Jessie.... she had GB in june and has lost 115lbs.... i had dinner with her the other night.... OMG... She kept saying... thank you over and over... and how i inspired her... she is now paying it forward with her mother...
It's those moments..... Dub...you keep encouraging and inspiring... You are doing an amazing job... but then again.. i always knew you would.
These are two of my seeds.... I know they would be ok with me showing there face... but i blocked out anyway... Leslie is holding her pants.... and jessie is in the white jeans... (that was at 85lbs lost, she has lost 30 more since)

Well done sir. Good to some guys piping in on results and experiances..
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

You're made of good stuff, Dub. You deserve the calm, centered feeling (and the energized part, certainly) that you got from taking time to talk with the young man. Feeling right on the inside tells us that we're doing right.