WLSResources/ClothingExch

When the time comes, you'll be guided to a maintenance plan by the practice's staff. The person you saw is no measure of what happens along the way. It's likely that she/he is ill, whether an eating disorder, a medical condition or something else. You'll be fine.

What was that, Miss Sleeve? Wash your mouth with soap. (@@Alex Brecher -- Three messages in a row. What's my prize.?)

Oh, oh, oh, one or six other things. ShrinkYourself.com, the site of psychologist Roger Gould, a great help for emotional eating. There is a pay version, but you can check off the free version. Read the emailed newsletter and do whatever exercises they provide. "The Beck Diet Solution," (book). The original book. Dr. Judith S. Beck, cognitiive behavior therapist and daughter of Dr. Aaron Beck, considered founder of CBT, wrote a later book with a similar title. It, however, includes a diet plan which is not useful to surgery people. Get the original (it has more useful material than the other) and read from page one, don't hop around. Do the exercises as they appear. Use a notebook for the exercises; it's a good idea to keep the book clean so that you can start over whenever it would be useful.

@@Miss_Sleeve_Bound, your screen name is a fortuitous fit for what I want to say to you, including an anecdote of sorts about my experience leading up to surgery. I get the significance of your name. Reading it the other way, though, you're not the least bit bound to surgery. It's a choice you made. It's also a choice you can unmake. I'm not suggesting that you cancel, just that you be cognizant of your autonomy in the matter. My surgery practice had a policy of having patients lose whatever percentage of the overweight amount prior to surgery. My surgeon, on the other hand, didn't care about that. I was thrilled, thinking that I'd continue eating until after surgery. Three weeks before my date it occurred to me that, if I were serious about losing weight, I would get a head start. That gave me time to lose 11 pounds, not very much, but enough to make me feel in control and positive about my prospects for success with my band. I had two options: the all-liquid plan or a modified diet of one very modest meal with two (or three? doesn't matter) protein shakes through the rest of the day. I took the second choice. Why not check with your practice on the advisability of a mixed menu. If they strongly recommend all-liquid, do it. You didn't mention your surgery date, but you're an adult who can do anything for the duration. Trust me on that. Say it aloud: I can do anything. Say it again. Say it as often as you fear otherwise. Since you say you're a "cheater," you shan't be spared my screed. Only naughty, little children cheat, It's their way to naughtily test the boundaries. The last time you heard the word "cheat," except in the case of supposed exclusive relationships, was in the schoolyard. That's because children cheat, but hotstuff adults choose. That's how you got to the surgeon's office in the first place. Stop applying disparaging vocabulary to yourself. You're becoming a changed woman. You can get support here and also at your practice's support group. Get yourself to the next meeting and keep going. If it doesn't provide a group, another hospital in your area will welcome you. Most do welcome patients from other practices. If you wrote your opening message thinking you're the only one having a rough time, you already know how wrong you were. The same at the in-person meetings. Sharing and learning from each other is a major component for most people. The smart ones, anyway. Did I leave anything out? Oh, yeah, if you read only the bold italics, start over. Laurie

There isn't much you can do to disguise purees, especially since others will see you at the blender or food processor often. Because your family has witnessed you doing some cockamamie diets, let them think that the Princess Puree Plan is the latest. If they've never heard of it (imagine that!), tell them it's new, devised by someone you work or go to school with, so word hasn't gotten out yet. Be sure to eat ve-e-ry slowly so that, when they notice your minute consumption, you can say that eating slowly lets your stomach and brain communicate and send a signal telling you that you feel sated by the small portions. Your starting weight isn't so great that the amount you lose in the next six weeks won't be noticeable. Do some fancy, verbal tap-dancing to keep them confused. It works every time. Family members who like each other believe each other or at least want to believe each other. Then, again, unless your family is particularly dopey, you won't get away with it. They may not guess surgery, but they'll know something is afoot. They will grill you within an inch of your sanity. I'm having fun with you, but do understand your wish for privacy. In truth, the puree stage makes it tricky to pull off the deception. Does a sibling or old friend live nearby? If it's someone you can trust to tell or at least not to pry, stay there so that your parents see less of the peculiar post-surgical protocol. (Maybe Princess Puree Plan isn't so preposterous. Real diets have had names far more stupid. And there is truth to the keep-'em-confused technique.) Promise to report back after Christmas. I'd love to know how you work it out.

@@itstimealready -- Some surgeons refine the procedure so that fewer incisions are needed. When I had lapband surgery, some were already doing a single incision in the pupik instead of the conventional five. I asked my surgeon about doing mine that way, but she thought a single cut left too much chance for hernia......Can you see that the photo is blurred just enough so that your abdomen looks like an infant's face? You have to squint a little, but it really does. Is this the same du-u-u-ude who has heretofore billed himself at every opportunity as the beginning and the end, the sun and the moon, and the standard of male pulchritude against whom all males are measured and for whom all females must swoon now exhibiting insecurity?

Regardless of your plans (such as how long you'll stay in Mexico; whether your husband will be your helper/caregiver or you'll have someone in Mexico arranged by the surgeon's office; etc.), I think your best decision would be to have family take care of your child back home. Either set of grandparents? If they live far away, can they stay at your house for the time? It would be simpler than your having to take the baby to them plus go to Mexico. There's a difference between having no one who is safe and reliable and being jittery parents who think no one on the planet can fill the bill. If this is your only child and you've never left him before, your discomfort may be the latter. You've seen other parents like that. It's a common discomfort, but is there really a valid basis for it? You won't feel great and won't be up to scooping your child up. Consider how much care and attention such a young child needs and how much help you'll need yourself for a while. Other members who've had sleeve can give you a better idea of what to expect If you're really stuck for someone to leave him with, you can have me. I was a champion aunt. I still am, but my nieces are now in their late 30's. They told me when they were little and tell me now how much fun I was and am. Two of their kids will provide references. Vote for me! Make it as easy as possible for yourself. You'll miss her and she'll miss you, but think of the exciting reunion you'll all have.

My in-between solution may meet scorn; friends looked at me cross-eyed at the time. Before surgery Diet Coke was high on my list. I stopped drinking it as-is when the band was installed, but, wondering which component I may have preferred all along -- taste or fizz -- I experimented with letting it go flat. For a couple of months, I'd fill glasses, leave them in the refrigerator until flat and drink up happily. Came the day that I took a sip and snarled, "Swill!". The taste had become loathsome with no warning. It's probably been 5 1/2 years since that last taste. The only fizzy things I've drunk at all since are champagne and hard cider, but not as often or as much as I'd like.

Sounds most unpleasant to be dehydrated to the point of being completely drained on two counts. Welcome back to being fully operational. Have you had any significant unfills before this? If so, care to share the reasons? I'm beginning to do some research regarding my band and the likelihood of keeping it. "Reputation system" has a medieval sound. It's to my benefit that it's been dropped or I might be in point debt or on the rack.

In no way am I a compiler, editor, designer or anything else of the FAQ section, but I will be a user and, therefore, want it to make sense. No FAQ I've consulted at any website has been the ultimate resource. They are intended to be quick references pertaining to the site's purpose and a guide to navigating the site.. What follows are a few examples of things I think should be considered. for the FAQ to answer questions like "Can I eat [fill in the blank]?" and "What is the best-tasting, chewable Vitamin?" (not to mention questions on other, near-infinite subjects) would require listing every item in the supermarket and drugstore and compiling a list of every BP member's favorite gummy. Makes no sense. Medical conditions that are included should be limited to those that have a bearing on or are affected by WLS. GERD/Reflux, yes. Tonsillitis, no. Gall bladder, maybe??? There are plenty others that are appropriate to include, but it's too easy for the list to get ridiculous. There are plenty of other sources, including WebMD. No need to duplicate what dozens of other sites and plain, old Uncle Google provide. No way should the FAQ interpret whether what a doctor tells a patient is accurate. BP is not a doctor and, even if it were, it wouldn't be the doctor of the person asking the question. Beside that, FAQ is not a type-in-your-question feature. @@2goldengirl's recommendation to start with a list of things for which people should contact their doctors is s-o-o-o-o right. I'd like to add that it be made just as clear from the outset that one's own doctor is the ultimate source of info and guidance. That, if you will, is the Prime Directive. I'll go back to my corner now.

@@2goldengirl -- The FAQ section will be accessed by its own tab, as FAQ's are designed universally (as far as I know) -- not a "sticky" affair.

@@Ashlegal -- Being badgered when it's clear you want to drop the subject is rant-worthy. This time, though, I understand the blank stares. If you'd said that you'd changed the way you eat -- cut out the junk, upped the nutritious, lower-cal foods, cut portions, and begun an exercise routine -- you wouldn't have gotten the stares. The old-fashioned, simple explanation is understandable by anyone. But what does it mean to "use a tool?" To us it's one way of saying "surgery," but to them? "Does she paper-clip her lips shut? use a hot glue gun?" The male thing is a big one and a mere variation on the theme (right, gentlemen?). The change in people's perceptions of us takes a lot of digesting. "He didn't recognize me as an individual when I was fat and now he's flirting? I'm the same person. Screw him. He's not good enough for me now that I know what he is." It's not even that simple. There are loads of tangents to the "screw him" stance. Speaking generally because I know zero about your relationship history, one of the common tangents, not so tangential in significance, is a defense against the attention. One thing you said here that I've seen you say previously is that your 50-lb. drop doesn't make all that noticeable a difference. Please do reconsider because it is inaccurate. Not seeing what's really in the mirror is a chapter in all the books about WLS. It was a topic long before the birth of WLS. I remember it being discussed in WW meetings decades ago. It really is difficult to see the true image and identify with it. Maybe your inability to see it is related to the other things you've talked about??? The mind needs to keep up with the body, a difficult but near-universal project. Wouldn't it be sad to end up feeling even a minimal degree of regret upon reaching the pot of gold? Speaking generally. @@justme29 -- It doesn't always happen, but if it does, you'll know that the ones who walk away were never genuine friends. Your friends (are we talking only about women friends?) are the ones who are happy for you and encouraging. The one who disappears, if overweight, wanted you so that she wouldn't be the only fat girl a social setting or didn't want to be outshone by a slim friend. Another possibility is that someone insecure about your friendship will leave you before you get a chance to leave her for not being a "suitable" friend. That's down the line. It could be that some friends now will back off from going to restaurants with you. They don't want to look like overeaters when you eat so much less and choose different foods. The only thing I can think of is, if a friend brings up the possibility of a shift in your relationship, let her know that you always want her in your life and that you count on her for support.

@@tcrehm -- brilliant idea in a bunch of ways. My first suggestion for an FAQ heading: Nervousness before surgery (meaning "tips for staying calm that week") That's it for starters. I'll be back with more. Now, since you asked... My opinion on FAQ organization: For ease of use, the headings should be written with the most commonly-used words and brief and broad as possible. For example, Water/Fluid Intake. Then, subheadings would precede paragraphs (again, brief as possible) on Water alone; other liquids that count toward the water quota; liquids that don't qualify (e.g., I was told not to count anything with caffeine) and whatever else I may not be mentioning. The fewer the main headings, the easier the FAQ's will be to navigate, but not so few that the info under each is unwieldy. . Nb: The section will be a huge help in several ways, but it won't eliminate endlessly repeated questions. Human beings tend to think, "My situation is different from all others, so I'll ask for myself." Some are over cautious. Others are feeling anxiety and need greater reassurance. Then there are the ones who really do have post-surgery problems.

Whoa, hold the phone. If it's melted, it isn't ice cream. It counts as Soup. (I just saw your screen name and, lo!, light. Yours may be first rebus I've seen since I was a wee thing.)

Sounds good. As I may be revising to sleeve, I'll be following your reports. My fate has yet to be determined, as I'll be reacquainting myself with my surgeon, NP and the gang. It's been a while, not a good one. I was banded twice four days apart at age 61. You're the only other person I've come across who had a similar experience, but moreso. If my second surgery had been problematic, I don't know that I would have gone for a third. My med plan required an overnight stay which worked in my favor. For the rest of the day after surgery #1 (10cc band), I was able to sip Water easily. Went for esophagram the following morning; the barium came right up. After that, not even the smallest sips of water would stay down. My surgeon thought that there may have been much fat on the side of the liver not visible during surgery or that I may have had swelling at the band site (or both, I suppose). I was put on IV for hydration and we decided to wait a few days to see if any internal swelling would go down. My initial feeling was, "Get this damned thing out of me and let me go home." Then I switched to, "After all this there is no way in hell that I'm leaving here without a band." Still unable to tolerate sips, we went back to surgery on day #4 (14cc band). All was well thereafter; went home the following day. I love my surgeon and never found fault with her. She truly felt bad for my experience and was supportive all the way. To make a long story longer, I did wonderfully well the first 15 months and then went downhill, an incident started me on regaining much of what I'd lost. On two occasions my band was loosened due to dilation and I'm sure I'm dilated again. Hence, my expectation that revision is on the horizon (the NP suggested I see the surgeon to discuss this quite a while ago). I don't want to walk away from the whole thing. I want to see through what I started way back. Your big smile is visible in your message. Keep going.

Holy crapola, folks. I dropped out of this topic a couple three day ago and. Just noticed that the message count had surpassed 50, so I say to myself, "Sweetie, take a look just to keep abreast." And what do I find? A passel of Amazons, each minus a breast, prepared for battle. This thread is a blood bath, much of it greatly amusing, but cause for chagrin all the same. At least I can say that I never did any of this. I just applied the cookies and icing directly to my hips. Go for the gusto! -- that's my mantra.

@@winklie Did you think I was judging? Alas, there is nothing so sad as an intended jest flapping in the wind. P.S. My reference to E. coli was based on someone else's message.

You have to choose the band tightness that makes sense to you and is wise for health and well-being. Here are a few of my thoughts in no particular order. If you're saying that solid food is painful going down or comes right back up, I'd suggest removing a bit of the Fluid from the band. On only two occasions in my six-year band history have I heard people say they wanted their bands as tight as yours is. One was specific about caring only about a very rapid weight-loss; he was achieving it, but at what cost? I heard from him years ago, so don't know his thinking now. An important consideration is that you're getting in enough calories. My practice advises not to go under 800, but preferably average about 1,000, which results in a very nice rate of loss. It also matters that you're getting as many nutrients in decent quantities as possible. The other consideration that I see is quality of life. I want solid food. Without it I'd be cranky and miserable. It's a Pinocchio thing -- I want and need to be a real, live girl. I want to sit at a table with friends without staring into their plates as I sip watered gruel. I want aromas rising from under my own nose. The textures and flavors of food belong in my mouth; I was designed that way by the planets. The act of chewing tells me that I'm human. And on and on. You gave sketch information on your history. It would be helpful to have the blanks filled in for respond to you as usefully as possible. Reading between the lines, I'm guessing that you're still young, but feeling more ready to be responsible for your weight-loss. That's great. Take part in BariatricPal. Also attend your practice's in-person support group. A face-to-face setting is especially helpful. If your practice doesn't offer a group, check the other hospitals in your area. Most welcome patients from the competition because it costs them nothing to have you talking with other people on their premises. There's also a "we're all in this together" attitude. P.S. What I didn't write in so many words is that you'd also do well to talk with your practice's RD, NP or surgeon about common-sense band tightness. The more info you have, the better the choices you make.

@@Thellie Band adjustments may be uncomfortable, but what of it? Some people squawk about them as though they've undergone appendectomy with no anesthesia. I've never felt more than discomfort. It hurts for as long as the needle is in. At some practices, adjustments are done under fluoroscope so that the port is visible. My practice and many others simply feel the port. At any rate, I think it's safe to say that you'll find adjustments less unhappy than the few days after surgery. The incisions are a primary culprit. You'll be fine. P.S. A thousand years ago I worked with a woman who was called Thel. It was short for her given name, a mash-up of her mother's and father's names. Yours is the only similar name I've ever heard.

@@sarahbethemails @@BLERDgirl @@winklie et al. -- What? No beef carpaccio in your lives? No steak tartare? With a raw egg yolk nestled on top or mixed in for the timid? You are missing out on some special dishes. Really. I mean it. Some of you mention that you eat sushi. Does that preclude sashimi, my preference? Does the rice give you courage? I thought I was the squeamish one. One of you specified E. coli as a requirement for eating anything raw. How does that compute?

As the others have said, speak to your gyn. From 0 to 8 days strikes me as mighty peculiar all around anyway. Run it by the surgeon, too, in case there's a chance that your cycle has been affected by surgery. The two doctors should talk.

@@Ashlegal -- Red Red Red Good Good Good. Big picnic basket, too, right? If necessary, lie to me. You're already crowded by your friends. I hope last-minute mood and energy boosts moved in on you so that you can enjoy your own party. Do I remember correctly that this is your birthday? Sweet 16 becomes you. Laurie

@@BLERDgirl -- thanks for the example. Vets really are kicked in the shins for such pinheaded reasons? How extreme if even "pretty close." The impression I got earlier was that some new people take exception to to-the-point responses. Face it, except for repeat flamers in the comments sections of media websites, too many tiptoe and strew rose petals before getting down to business. Maybe, just maybe, the new people are jesting? Fake-pouting? Turn it back: Sure, then, but first whirl your pizza in the blender.