tomi71

Absolutely! I'm only sorry I waited as long as I did. Of course there's some downsides for me. One of the biggest challenges was making consistent exercise a habit but I did it and I'm at a point where it has made such a positive change, not just physically but mentally and emotionally. It has helped me with the monster called anxiety that I have battled my entire life. The one issue I don't like are the tummy issues but I figure it's the price I paid for getting healthier. I pay much more attention to my health. And I continue with counseling. Plus my body is strong! I'm down 130 pounds and my blood pressure is wonderful and I've significantly lowered my chances for diabetes.

Stay strong everyone. You are all worth it and deserve happiness and love.

You look good, and happy. Sorry for the bum relationship issues.

I'm down another 2 sizes. 10 to go! Slow and steady. [emoji6]

H

Man you look fantastic.
Keep up the good work.

Sent from my SM-G900V using BariatricPal mobile app

Congratulations on the weight loss and the relationship decisions - neither is easy

You look fantastic.

Girl.... I was married for 26 years. When i got banded 11/09 i was 230#.. zero self confidence or self esteem. My ex brought me down at every turn. He never wanted me to lose the weight to begin with. Now i see that it was just his way of keeping me down and him in control. But, 100#s later and 8 years..... i am soooooo happy. As the weight went down.. the confidence went up and up and up and up.... he hated it... So, last year i filed for divorce. He moved out about a year ago and i started dating..... and dating.... and dating..... my friend Tracy insisted , i joined Match. I was thinking...OMG, what kind of crazy men will i hear from. BUT, i didn't post a picture. Some say if you don't have a pic they wont talk to you... i say... get to stepping. If you don't like what you read on a profile and your that superficial that you need a pic ...then F U.... The first week i had dozens of men contacting me. I weeded through them and replied to a few. One of which was Tim.... I will say he was not what i "normally" go far.... but he met all of what i was looking for in a partner... and i messaged him.... I am so glad i did.
So dating i did.... there were quite a few.... and i almost needed a spread sheet to keep track of who, when and where. I was dating so much that i was wearing myself out. The men all knew that i was dating multiple men and were cool with it. Tim got real smart real fast.... he started scheduling our next date during the current date. He got tired of me saying... NO i already have a date that day/night/weekend..... hehe Got to the point were he was occupying most every weekend and some weekdays. The rest of the guys faded away.... Tim is one of the last remaining gentlemen. He opens every door, pulls out chairs, holds my jacket, holds my hand, compliments me all the time.... we have great conversation. Our first dated was Oct. 15th and things are going great. Last month he got promoted and is having to relocate to Mississippi... which is about 3 hours from my house. He asked me to move in with him..... so last weekend we went look at houses. so Yes, i'm moving in.
The last thing i wanted to do was get serious with a guy, but, like a friend told me.... Chris, men like him are rare, ride this train and see where it goes.
Put your self out there, be accepting of people and new adventures... Never know who's around the corner......
Chris
PS..... this was us a couple weekends ago in Boca Raton, Fl

I avoid FIber One products because they contain cellulose which is basically processed virgin wood pulp. I eat Beans because I get both fiber and Protein from it. I know not everyone likes Beans. I also eat rolled oats for added fiber. I make oatmeal from scratch using rolled oats, brown sugar or date paste and almond milk. I sometimes add a bit of Protein Powder to the mix as well.

Hi It's been a long time since I've been on. Just checking up everyone. Have you reached goal? I'm 15 lbs away ! [emoji1421][emoji5]

Hello i was sleeved 7/1/14 i have have lost 76 pounds and ive been stuck for about 5 montjs not sure if im.done im doing zumba now 5 days per week to see if that will jumpstart me with the rest but very happy with how im feeling with my health and energy sleep apnea gone and im a size 12 from a 24 22 so cant ask more i can def hold more food than at first and i know i still lack in reaching Water goals and maybe more Protein at his point workin on it though i took a time to put on all this weight cant expect all of it to come off quick even though im obessed with comparing my results with others i wish it could be more sometimes but im very happy and pleased

[mention=307585]dredfern[/mention] I wholeheartedly agree. My husband deserves better than what I gave him. he deserves better PERIOD. We're in counseling now. My contact with the young man has stopped. He did reach out to me last week to check on me but I told him I was fine and that he shouldn't call me again. He wanted me to know that he loved me and really wish things could be different because I truly make him happy. I feel the same-- but I know it would never work. Its all just a fantasy. I choose to be a better partner to my husband and work to fix our issues so that we can have a healthy and happy relationship, or agree to let it go and move on. No one deserves to have their heart crushed. I am doing whatever I can to repair, rebuild and restore.

I hope in counseling the therapist is getting you to address and explore that part of you that compelled you to have the relationship with the man. It's important to get to the bottom of why and your husband needs to know why. It may seem obvious but there's usually a lot more to the story than meets the eye.

For me, it's flattering...very flattering...to be fancied by a man but I love my husband and want my marriage intact. So when temptation shows up I've to think of how hard divorce can be & ask myself do I really want to live with buyers remorse that can come with an affair and that usually does it for me.Lol

Plus.......

my husband is struggling because of my PTSD. I've suffered with the PTSD monster for many years which has caused me to come across as uninterested towards him, which couldn't be further from the truth. What is the truth is that I was viciously attacked in Mexico while he was out to sea (Navy) and almost killed. I had to defend myself or die. As a result the anxiety and OCD I've had since childhood exacerbated into crippling anxiety, OCD and major depressive disorder for which I take meds. The weight of it all killed my soul and it wore him down.

The attack happened 24 years ago and I only told him 2 years ago. I never got help to really deal with the issues until very recently because I was scared about what exactly was going on with me and what his reaction might be when he found out.

At any rate, because of my behavior of being distant and untrusting and cold, instead of turning in to me, he turned away from me, which devastated me greatly. I think he was/is scared, angry, definitely feels rejected and hurt that I didn't tell him and he says he feels guilty that he wasn't there to protect me.

We are working through it though and I have learned that his decision to turn away from me is his $hit not mine... his actions are not my burden to carry & visa versa. So I make no apologies for waiting so long to tell him. Hell, it took me 5 years to even tell my psychiatrist. I do make amends for the bad decisions I've made because of my PTSD.

What I'm trying to say is after a loss of 100+ pounds and getting into shape and going on a fabulous cruise just a few months ago, I thought we were on the right track.

The woman he was "involved" with was 100lbs bigger, married and miserable. Lol so he definitely wasn't thinking straight either. Jumping from a frying pan into a fryer wouldn't have helped him.

We are slowly healing, taking it day by day.

My belief is that some couples need periodic counseling whether they're in a good place or not, to help keep the foundation strong. Had we done that I really think we'd not be in the spot we are in now.

Marriage can be hard at times so counseling as needed gives a safe place to air out dirty laundry, teaches how to set healthy boundaries, which in turn can strengthen and keep the marriage bond growing.

My "lecture" probably sounds pontifical but I really hope you guys make it and move past this and Celebrate a life time of marital happiness together. Don't give up!

Hi all! I wanted to give a quick update since you were all so supportive and helpful.

First, My dr was able to get me in early and prescribe my meds. Woohoo!! Even better, she was previously an OBGYN and has experience with gastric patients. I really like her and I think it's going to be great. Granted, I have to drive an hour to see her..but that's ok.

Secondly, I broke my 2.5month stall! Woohoo! Upping the calories has definitely helped. I still need to get a scale but, well, times is hard and I'm a broke chick till after the holidays and the upteen Birthdays I have between now and then.

Anyway...I'm better than I was. Still battling but that's a life long journey. Thank you for your support!

How did your holidays go? Happy New Year! I struggle with very similar mh issues--high functioning but CRUSHING anxiety, depression, OCD, bi-polar 2. This & meds have definitely had an affect on my weight loss. I stalled for almost 12 months! Then I started running and doing good strength training with heavier weights and almost overnight it seems, I lost 25 lbs. now I'm 35 away from goal. It's taken me almost 2.5 years to lose 90 lbs but my doc says slow and steady. I use the 10% rule because I find it helps reset my base weight to lower pounds making it easier to keep off.

Now if I could only get rid of my mh struggles......lol

Stop comparing yourself. Years ago my aunt had the surgery and she gained every single oz back PLUS. I never told anyone about my surgery except my husband because a) while scared he supported me and I knew I'd hear from others, " your aunt had that surgery and look at her now!"

This is where a little tunnel vision comes in handy. I learned to stay in my lane and eff anyone and everyone who has unsolicited advise or opinions. I also almost never compare or obsess over the failures of others. You shouldn't either as you are doing this for yourself before all others.

Keep track of where you are now compared to the past and look forward to meeting more goals...especially non-scale victories. NSVs are so very important.

Best wishes to you!

MarieMarie, on 22 Dec 2014 - 07:11, said:

My granddaughter got Baptized yesterday. I NEVER look forward to dressing up. I think stockings should be outlawed. Mine were easy to get into, loose but held tummy in. Tall boots that I purchased but only had on once as it is hard holding breath and leaning over same time. Slid on. Wow I felt like a million bucks. 1x instead of 3x is a huge miracle!

This is me! The difference is I like getting dressed up. I'm very girly and into fashion. It was just such a challenge at my old weight. I started at a 4x and was creeping up on 5's. I now wear a 1x and I pinch myself every time. I haven't been in that size in over 10 years! Things like this remind me that no matter how long it takes, this was the right thing for me.

Congrats everyone.

I hate stockings even more now because I struggle to get them to stay up! It used to be a struggle to squeeze into them and survive the day while feeling like a stuffed sausage casing! Lol i'll take saggy stockings though.

Haven't been in these boards in some time so just want to say I am glad to see everyone having great success. Keep up the good work everyone and Happy Thanksgiving.

I am able to run almost 2 miles. That may not seem like much but for someone who loathes running, that is a big deal.

My panniculus is shrinking every week thanks to the running. And I can actually see my ribs!!!

I think the biggest thing for me is no longer obsessing over how long it's taking me to get to my goal weight. I can see it coming but more importantly I am healthier, stronger, and food no longer consumes my mind!

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I like Fage 0%. To it I'll add dehydrated fruits or some pure pumpkin and a dash of pumpkin spice and about a tsp of agave or some Splenda.

I do some light cheeses.....mostly deli strike cheddar or Babybel. Otherwise I eat full fat. I find satiates better.

Since I rarely eat bread, I don't eat cream cheese except on rare occasion.

Narcos is AMAZING! The Tudors, Borgias, True Detective, Daredevil, The 100, Orange is the New Black, Game of Thrones, The Killing, American Horror Story... I've really been liking the Netflix original series. I think almost all of them are good.

Stalls aren't uncommon AND two-month stalls or stalls that go even longer can be quiet normal from what my doc told me. This is because usually weight loss is not linear. Couple that with the fact that depending on how long you've been over weight and a slew of other biological factors one can see how a "long" plateau can occur. It all boils down to how your own body reacts to weight loss. Of course you have to be very mindful of what you are eating too and make sure you are changing up the exercises.

Was just discussing with the hubby buying the scale. I have a Fitbit Flex so I was contemplating purchasing the scale. For now we are holding off. Let us know how it works for you.

Stalls!!!!! They can be the devil! Keep eating healthy and exercising. You'll see that stall go away. I'm a year out and have been bouncing around the 190s for 6 months. BUT I've got something I've not seen since high school and that's muscles and better fitting clothing. That scale can be a real jerk, though.

I was told not to lift anything greater than 20lbs until after my 1-month post-op check up. Then, take it slowly with anything that really uses ab muscles (had a hernia fixed along with the VGS.) I stuck with walking daily, adding more and more distance as I could handle.

About month 3 I started with weights and and doing ab work. I incorporated running into my routine at about month 7.

I say go for it. Your daughter is in the right place should an emergency arise and I know that would give me peace of mind.