Bobalooey

Also make sure you always weigh on the same scale. There was an 8 pound swing between the Dr's "very expensive" digital scale and the one, (also very expensive", I was weighed on at the surgery center.

When was the last time you almost fell down from laughing? I had to call the Texas Laporoscopy Center today to dispute a billing error (long story). Anyway, they had to put me on hold and this "On-Hold Music" kicked in. They had some wedding singer record an original tune that almost had me wetting myself. I've called them 3 times now asking to be put on hold just so I could play this gem for people in the office. None of them have recovered yet and they've started calling it themselves just to hear it. I kid you not....for a good time call 409-719-0009 and tell them you wish to be put on hold because you need to hear the inspiring on-hold music. If you don't trust me, you can point your browser to http://www.felixspiegelmd.com and click on Contact Us, compare the phone numbers, and you'll know I'm not setting you up! After you hear it, imagine being left on hold for 1/2 hour having to hear this over 60 times in a row! Now I'm craving cheese and corn both at the same time!

Impressed by that last one I am!

giveyouthemoon, A real wise ass you are!

Kellymoos, You are in that commercial???? :rolleyes I was only kidding....its a masterpiece! Did you by any chance provide the ...gulp....music?

What I should probably do is record the on-hold music to a digital file and post it here on the site for people to click on in order to hear it. It just dawned on me that I have to visit that Dr. on the 27th of this month for my first fill and I probably don't want him pissed off at me when I'm there with a syringe stuck in my belly.

BubbaMe20022003, I'm so sorry that they rejected your request. They called me before and asked me to stop having people call to be put on hold. Their phone system has been under seige since I posted this along with the people at my office who continue to call it. Put ME on hold for a half hour will they........I'll fix their ass I will.

Ha ha ha....that's the one....what a freaking hoot! The lyrics alone don't do it justice. Priceless!

Just when I didn't think this could get any funnier, I discovered that TLC now has a TV commercial....with the same freakin on-hold music. You've got to call that number 409-719-0009 between 9:00AM and 5:00PM Central time to ask to be put on hold. Thank God the service they perform is so much more professional then their commercial production.

You haven't lived until you've overheard your child tell his friends that "My Dad had to have surgery because he's an O'Beast". What a kick in the access port that one was!

Delarla, You were supposed to turn it off after use.....and what a cheap skate you are giving a used gift to a friend! This was funny, bet you had a real chuckle when they hung up. Do try the number again tomorrow, this is the best laugh I've had in months.

Kathy, Did you call it? Did ya? Huh? Did ya? I'm still laughing.

Kellie, Your content is great. I build websites as part of the array of services my private business offers (see http://www.motortrike.com as an example of one of the sites I've built). I feel I've been educated by the best when it comes to building sites that come alive and truly convey a message. My only suggestion would be to "lose" the black background. Choose plain white or a light colored neutral color with black text (except for when you need emphasis, but only do that sparingly). Here is why, if you wanted to print the page, some browsers would print the black background as well, practically emptying ink and toner cartridges in doing so. I use a set of design guidelines that have worked extremely well and have won us a few web design awards. Check out the guidelines at: http://www.itc.virginia.edu/desktop/web/webdesign.html I applaud your effort in sitting down to learn to do this, its fun and the site you are building will be of immense help to others like us (not to mention the fact that it is a great testimonial to your having lost as much weight as you have). My point in offering the advice is to save you the time I wasted in trying to perfect my skills. Please don't be put off or discouraged by my suggestions, it was by no means meant as criticism.

You better believe they'll weigh you before surgery. They'll need to know to make sure anesthesia amounts are correct. I lost 1.5 pounds just being on the liquids-only diet for 24 hours pre-surgery.

My doctor said I have a lot of muscle mass around my abdomen and recommended I opt for the low-profile port so that it wouldn't be noticeable after I lose all of the weight. I'm not sure it this was a sales pitch, but the doctor knew I was paying for the whole gig right out of my pocket. I opted for the port (additional $700). Its been a little over two weeks (banded on 6/30/2005) and I actually have to poke around now to find the port, it stuck out quite a bit until all of the swelling went down. I know it will take some time before I know if I got my money's worth, but at this point I'm glad I went for it.

The sleep Studies (Testing) that I had were both nightmares. They glue a s***load of electrodes to you, hand you the wiring harness and march you into the room you're supposed to sleep in. Then they tell you to get into the bed (bed.....more like a cot) and they proceed to hook up the wiring harness to the patch panel on the wall just behind the bed. If you are are used to sleeping in the buff or maybe just underwear, abandon all hope. Bring loose fitting PJ's. They'll even measure how many (voluntary/involuntary) erections you have through the night so you can expect there will be wires coming out of every sleeve and pant leg. Once you are in the bed and comfortable (yeah...right) they tell you to go to sleep. So now you are "rigged" up like a phone closet, in a strange room, with the lights out, oh yeah and a little camera over your head watching your every movement, and you'll keep telling yourself you've got to go to sleep. Longest night of my life, I don't recall even dozing off for a moment, but they said they got adequate readings. The second time I had to go back with the CPAP pump test where they determined the proper amount of pressure to set it at and whether or not I could sleep with it on. I could really write a book about the second night. I'm looking forward to getting my weight down to where I can discard the pump, which I'm become so accustomed to now, I'm actually afraid to even take a nap without it. Sleep Apnea is a serious serious condition and never to be taken lightly. I even had the Uvulo Pharyngeal Palato Plasty operation (UPPP) where they surgically removed my uvula and most of my soft palate to counteract the apnea. The fact that I needed the CPAP in addition will tell you how well the UPPP worked. Lastly, just wait until the sleep study people show you the EKG style readout that shows you how many times you actually stop breathing throughout the night. Freaked me out so bad that for fear of having a heart attack, I slept upright in a chair for weeks until I was able to get the damn CPAP. My CPAP experiences would yield yet another book. You've got to go through this though or you won't get the Rx for the pump. Don't be afraid of the testing, but don't expect it to be a walk in the park. If I had to do it all over again, I'd have shown up so snockered on tequila that I could have slept through a nuke. Unfortunately, this would have skewed the test results really bad. Maybe try to stay up 3 nights in a row leading up to it and you'll sleep through it. Nuff said. I'd really like to hear back about your experiences with the testing to see how it varies from mine.

I was filled during surgery to check the band for leaks and then the saline was removed again. I don't know if this is standard procedure, but I know for a fact it is practiced by Dr. Felix Spiegel of the Texas Laporascopic Center. I have the pictures to prove it.

Heh heh, I have two responses. 1.) Why would we have to imagine? 2.) Hmmmmm....grapefruit!!!

They won't listen!!!

My advice.....just take the damn thing off!!!!

Parvathi, For an explanation of all the freaking abbreviations they use on this site, check out the thread at: http://www.lapbandtalk.com/showpost.php?p=86346&postcount=1 It took me over a week to find this and prior to that my imagination ran away with itself trying to figure out what NSV was. DH was another one that I thought stood for D*** Head (which my wife occasionally refers to me with). And for the life of me I thought this Aunt Flo everybody was talking about was some pain-in-the-ass lady who lurked on this web site and then went visiting Lap-Banders uninvited and hung out there for a few days before moving on to somebody else. I vowed to not give out my address on this site for fear she'd be knocking on my door next!!

You're a good sport Nita. I wasn't sure if you were going to be offended by my finding levity in your situation. I meant no disprespect.

I see. The nipple ring would be like some kind of punk'd out purple heart!!! Is that it?

Barb, Huh? Wazzat mean?

Glad you were amused. I'ts almost been two weeks since my surgery and my sense of humor is getting sarcastic and cynical as the swelling has subsided and has been replaced with "real" hunger. I'm on mushies now but it just ain't cuttin it, ya know! Heres hoping my first fill (scheduled for Jul 27) will kill some of these hunger pangs. Had some baby food for the first time today. Man does that stuff really blow! Force of habit has me opening the refrigerator about 100 times through the night too. I look in, realize I can't have anything in there, close the door, go back and do it again 10 minutes later. Seems the biggest dragon to slay through all of this is in my head, not my gut. I've no doubt now that I couldn't have done this on sheer will power and this band should help protect me from myself. By the by, my nipple has healed nicely.