JThompson72

Also, I do take prescription iron pills now. I don’t have any issues with constipation and I’ve been on them since June. I take folate and ferrous something.

I had 7 IV infusions for anemia. They weren’t bad. Worst part was getting the IV in cause I have bad veins. They took about half an hour, give it take. The arm getting the infusion would get really cold, which was weird. And I swear I weighed heavier afterward. I understand it depends on the type of iron. The one I got rarely caused issues. The one they used to use - everyone had a reaction.

Congratulations on your success!

So I've really been struggling with wanting more and more food (even if I've just eaten) and my ability to deny myself is just not there right now. I talked to my PA at my surgeons office and she prescribed Contrave, to help with feeling more satisfied with what I eat and less cravings. It was way too expensive so we went with a compound pharmacy. Still expensive but I'm willing to pay it for a couple of months if it will help. I started it last week, at one capsule daily. Beginning tomorrow, I will take two daily, The week after, I will take two in the morning and one at night then the next week go to two in the morning and two at night. Thats a lot of pills! I just bought a pill organizer from Amazon. I've tried weight loss pills and shots in the past, pre-sleeve, and had very little success with them. Generally, its not my appetite that is the problem - I have never had to be hungry to eat. So, when my PA asked how I felt about taking something to help with cravings and feeling more satisfied with what I eat, there was a moment when I nearly said no, no more weight loss pills. But I didn't take the extreme step of surgery only to still be a slave to food. So I said yes and that is why I'm willing to pay for these pills if there is a chance they will work. I should mention that I allowed sugary sweets back into my life a few months back and I'm now back to being a complete sugar fiend. The sugar may be responsible for the shaking and the nervousness as I've continued to eat them (but just this one time I say nearly every day). Each day I'm not going to eat it and each day I do it again even knowing what it does to me and ignoring signs from my body. Last night, however, my body put its foot down and said no more in the form of the worst dumping episode I've experienced. If I hadn't recognized it from milder previous episodes, I might have gone to the ER thinking I was dying. I used to wish I would dump like gastric bypass so I wouldn't eat sweets. What was I thinking??? All the sugar is in the trash now and I'm writing about last night in an effort to make sure I remember it and don't pick up the sugar again. Contrave is Naltrexone and Bupropion (sp). Buproprion is Wellbutrin, which I took years ago to help me quit smoking so I knew I'd tolerate it pretty well. And I am. No negative side effects so far other than maybe nervousness or jitteriness. I notice my hands shake but not all the time. And my jaw clenches but I am a pretty nervous/worried/anxious person even without meds. And this may be due to the sugar or a combination of meds and sugar. The first couple of days were a little weird in that I was kind of unsteady feeling for the first few hours but not enough to keep me from doing stuff. That has gone away other than the shaking. Also for the first couple of days, I had very little appetite and felt pretty wishy washy about eating and what I ate. I also got full quicker. As in, can't take another bite full. My appetite is now back to normal along with the cravings. Something that may be totally unrelated is my stomach has started to feel a little burny right before I get hungry (stomach growling). That is new. I am wondering if maybe thats my stomachs new way of feeling empty. I take 40 mg of omeprazole daily. Possibly I am eating less without realizing it because I'm eating so badly. I am down 1 pound from last Sunday, despite the sugary sweets and not totally sticking to my planned low carb diet. Today I start taking two capsules daily so I'll take the 2nd one tonight. I'm curious to see how it effects me. I am hopeful that as I add more, it will curb my appetite again but mostly I'd like it to dull the food obsession and cravings. They are bad now but I've been fighting them since surgery - they never left me. I literally dreamed of hamburgers during my clear liquid stage. Sometimes, I think they are worse after surgery than before. Or maybe I just feel them more now cause I can't indulge them the way I used to. Sorry this is so long. I wanted to write out how I'm doing with the Contrave for myself and maybe for anyone who is interested in it.

Update -- took myself off Contrave on day 9 due to side effects of shaking, nervousness, racing pulse, raised blood pressure and sleeplessness. On the positive side, last Saturday's horrible dumping episode has me totally off sweets so far and the memory of that episode cuts any cravings for sweets pretty short.

I’m not looking to date so much as find new friends. My parents recently moved out of state and now a really good friend is in the process of moving out of state, as well. They are my personal support group and, while i have other friends and acquaintances (not many), I’m not near as comfortable sharing/discussing my surgery and struggles. They either have no way of understanding or think it’s willpower and taking the easy way out. I live about an hour from Louisville, KY. Nearly two years out from Sleeve surgery. Stalled/stuck/struggling — any other word for not being fully successful but not done striving for it.

I'm a cat lady currently disguised as a dog lady. From the time I was a little girl, I have had cats. I miss cats so much but I now have a dog with a pretty serious prey drive. Can't do that to a cat. Sent from my SM-J700T1 using BariatricPal mobile app

Went to the WLS seminary on Saturday. It was scheduled for one hour but was closer to two hours. It started with a sleeve patient a year or so out who had lost all of his weight. He told us about his journey and it was quite inspiring. He started by saying nothing works until you get your mind right. Which I thought was an awesome way to start out. After all, the surgery is not on your head it is on your stomach. He was followed by the surgeon, who was interesting and answered lots of questions. He started with a video with information on obesity that is fairly new to me (and here I thought I'd heard all the theories), basically stating that obesity is caused by hormones, especially ghrelin. The bariatric coordinator spoke last and I didn't get a very good impression of her. Probably because she acted kind of annoyed when I asked a question. So, the seminar was good. It was a very good day overall. My friend came with me and we had a very nice day discussing surgery and everything else while shopping. Overall, the seminar didn't really scream a decision at me. The surgeon does all types of WLS so he mainly presented facts about each. I have, however, begun to think that maybe WLS isn't my answer. I've struggled with why this would be different than the last one and how not to fail again. I had decided to see a shrink, a nutritionist, maybe get some drugs and, most recently, go back to OA to help me with my food issues on top of WLS. On Saturday, my plan was definitely go back to OA and see a shrink and nutritionist (I really don't like drugs) on top of WLS. Now, though, I'm thinking OA, a nutritionist and maybe no WLS. I did go ahead and submit my packet, though. The bariatric coordinator said they'd contact me in maybe two weeks to set up a day for marathon testing. Among other fun stuff, she mentioned an EGD. While I don't like the idea of having something shoved down my throat, after 8 years with a band, its probably a good idea to have it done. So, no rush for me on WLS. I'll go through with the certifications but for now, I'm back in OA and already feel a little of the calmness and a lot of the hope returning.

He did your appointment go? Sent from my MT2L03 using the BariatricPal App

I'm curious - why no pre op diet? Sent from my MT2L03 using the BariatricPal App

Yes. Got the band in 2008. Took three fills before I had any restriction and that was mainly just food getting stuck. I don't know that I was too young but I do think I didn't have enough understanding of myself and my relationship with food. I'm considering a revision to another wls and it makes me excited to think I'll be rid of this band if I do get another surgery. Sent from my MT2L03 using the BariatricPal App

I've never blogged before but I'm going to give it a try. This is basically me trying to work out whether to have another weight loss surgery (got a band in 2008) and, if yes, which one. It will probably be extra long and all over the place. To be honest, I've pretty much decided to have another surgery. I hate it and it terrifies me but after 40 plus years of fighting and losing, its becoming pretty obvious that diet and exercise aren't going to work. And I'm just so tired of fighting every day and never winning. And I'm not just mentally tired. I'm physically tired, also. I can barely get myself up for work in the mornings. I'm sucking air like a fish out of water just walking from the car to the office. My knees and hips hurt. Somehow, I've managed to aggravate/pinch my sciatic nerve while sleeping (yes - sleeping!) twice just this year. I know I've been very lucky up until now with being this heavy and not having too many medical problems. But I think that is changing. Forty four years is just too long to put this much weight on my poor joints and bones and heart. I can only hope I haven't done so much damage that I can't come back from it. As I said, its felt inevitable for some time but I just got back from vacation with family I hardly ever get to see. There are so many things this weight keeps me from being able to do. I'm constantly stressed over where I can sit/fit and can I walk that far and that fast. I hated slowing everyone down. I even had to take a rest while walking to a restaurant. Granted, it was hilly and three blocks but no one else had issues. Just me. Everything I do is impacted by my weight. In fact, everything about me has been shaped by my weight. I haven't told too many people yet but once I get the insurance approval and the appointments start, I will tell everyone close to me. When I got the band, I kept it a secret from my co-workers and cringed whenever family would try to discuss it. In fact, I still don't really tell anyone. I'm really very ashamed at my failure with the band. I think I don't tell people about the band because I don't want people to know I'm fat. As if they can't see me trying to bust out of my size 26/28 clothes. Also, I think it was sort of a fail safe for me - if I don't tell people, they won't see if/when I fail. This time, I'm going to be open about it and take away my ability to deny everything after the fact. I'm also going to start seeing a therapist to help with my food issues and binging. I am hopeful that the surgeons office will have someone to refer me to. I think this will be very important for me. If I could do this alone I'd have done so by now. I'm also thinking maybe some medication to help with mood swings and cravings. When I first decided to consider another WLS, I was not really aware of what the sleeve was. I thought it was just another new type of gastric bypass. So now I'm trying to decide which WLS would be best for me. The gastric bypass truly scares me. Re-routing intestines just seems like playing with fire. If we didn't need them just like they were we wouldn't have them in the first place. I like the idea of the sleeve. Cut out most of the stomach and hunger hormone. No hunger and a tiny stomach. My cousin got the sleeve and has lost 200 lbs in 3 years. She says she often forgets to eat cause she's just not hungry. Wow - what is that like? Just the idea of not being hungry makes me hungry (yeah, I'm broken). But the sleeve is restriction only and I already have a restriction only device inside me. I was hungry immediately following my band surgery and it never made me feel full, just sick but still hungry. For my own decision making purposes, below are some questions I think I need to address in order to make a decision: 1. Do I want to be normal sized or just not so fat? Weird question, I know, but a friend of mine had the gastric bypass a few years back and lost so much weight the docs wanted her to gain 20 lbs, She is a couple of years younger than me but she looked so old. Nearly twice her age. BUT, she had a lot of bad complications and is/was very malnourished. Maybe a sleeve would allow me to lose enough weight to get healthier but not too much. Yes, I'm very vain. I'm not sure, though, that going through surgery to maybe lose a little weight is a good idea. If I'm going to have surgery, why not go big and try to lose the majority of my excess weight? 2. Can I give up food? This should be number 1. A tiny little voice in my head is telling me this is the real source of my fear. Food is my ultimate frenemy. Seriously, I only just gave food the title of frenemy yesterday. I smoked for over 20 years and quit 10 years ago. To date, that is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. But to give up food - the thought terrifies me and nearly brings me to tears. When I think of it, I think of an episode of My 600 lbs Life about Lupe. She is 39 years old and immobile. She's nearly died a few times. She hides food and binges. Food is her comfort. Because of her heart issues, she gets a sleeve instead of gastric bypass. At one point, she asks out loud if she can give up food because its been her comfort for so long. I think about her asking that a lot. For her, it wasn't just maybe food was killing her. It had already tried a couple of times. Food has such a hold on her that despite the knowledge, she was still asking if she could give it up. I realized watching that episode that I would have to give up food if I have surgery. I don't believe I can have both because food (my frenemy) wants me to be sick and tired and die young. I will definitely need the therapist for this one. 3. What will I do without food? Breakfast. lunch and dinner are currently the highlights of my day. What will I do without them? I'll need something to look forward to and concentrate on. This is probably where the therapist will come in handy. 4. Can I handle the post surgery diet? I'm going low carb on Monday to sort of get ready for eating high protein after surgery. Not the same, I know, but close. Sort of. I diet well for a limited amount of time and then I start to slip, eventually binging on all the forbidden foods. I've never been able to maintain the momentum of a diet, though. I lose interest. Get tired of it. Confuse myself by reading about a different kind of diet and then fall off and into a binge. 5. If I choose gastric bypass, will the fear of dumping be enough to keep me away from my fave foods - cake and cookies? This probably goes with #2. I'm scheduled to attend a WLS seminar on 16 April. I can't wait. The surgeons office said its about two weeks after the seminar before you get an appointment with the surgeon. I feel like he would recommend the gastric bypass due to my BMI of 59 and because it would be a revision from the lap band. My health insurance currently offers a free weight loss coaching program that I am participating in (not successfully). It uses the DASH diet. I'm wondering if they would consider that to be medically supervised. Also, my primary care docs office has a weight loss program I'm doing. Maybe that would also count. Not that either have really helped me much. They've actually been kind of non-starters for me. The one through my insurance allowed me to get weight loss drugs at a lower cost but they didn't really do what they were supposed to do so I didn't continue. Definitely my insurance has records of my weight issues, though.

So my seminar is this Saturday and I went ahead and filled out my patient profile packet yesterday. It was pretty long and asked me why I thought I was unsuccessful in the past and why I think I'll be successful this time. Not really hard questions but they got me thinking. Why was I unsuccessful in the past? My friends and I (all professional dieters) have a saying about weight loss -- when I'm on I'm on and when I'm not I'm not. Maybe we aren't all that creative but we're basically saying that when I'm motivated, I can pass anything up and am a model of control. But when that motivation fades or I'm not "feeling it", I pass nothing up. In fact, I grab extra for later and just in case. I've been like this since I first started dieting in my teens. I lose interest/motivation, get tired of not having what I want, decide "I've got this" when I really never do have it. The sad thing is I can rarely get that motivation back for that particular diet once I've fallen off. I think my body treats diets like a virus and develops antibodies against it. Underneath all that, of course, is my food addiction. Yep, I'm an addict. And like all good addicts, I can quit for a while but I always go back for my fix. A few years back I started going to Overeaters Anonymous (OA). I am currently 44 years old. Prior to my 40's, I would have said I was not a food addict. I didn't really eat all that much, I just have a slow metabolism and bad genes. Then I went to my first meeting and realized these were my people. They weren't all heavy like me (some were quite slim) but they were just like me and I was just like them. That was such an emotional shock. My whole life I thought I was alone and then I discovered I wasn't. I did really well in OA but then I quit going and quit following my eating plan. I have yet to successfully get back to that eating plan. It was such a great eating plan, too. I created it myself. I lost maybe 30 plus lbs but in OA, losing weight is secondary to controlling the overeating so I didn't sweat the weight loss, I was working on not overeating. I learned a lot in OA --- that I wasn't alone, that I didn't need to eat until I was full - just until I wasn't hungry anymore, that food addiction is a progressive disease, and that even when we are most in control of our eating, our addiction is in the corner lifting weights and getting stronger. I also learned that just about all OA'rs fall off the wagon. Repeatedly. I tend to forget the good things I learned but I never forget that nearly all of them fall off the wagon. So disheartening. It makes me mad that I have to have an addiction that I can't just kick for once and for all. Nope, I have to have a food addiction. The one addiction most people don't care about and don't really consider much of an addiction. In fact, most people joke about it. Don't get me wrong, though, OA is a wonderful program. I wish I had never quit going. It was such a stupid and childish reason. I don't live in a large city but I live very close to one. I went to my first few OA meetings in that city but couldn't continue making that drive so often so I started going to a local meeting on Saturdays. This meeting consisted of 3 people. Four people once I started going but I think we only had all 4 show up just once. It wasn't a very good meeting and one of the members would stare at me the whole time. It made me so nervous and anxious. I should have said something but I didn't want to embarrass anyone. Usually I would just stare at the reading so I didn't have to see this person staring but one meeting, I had plans immediately after and texted my friend to say when I'd be there. The member who continuously stared at me interrupted the reading to ask that I not use my phone during the meeting because it was distracting. Of course, I was embarrassed at first but then I got really angry. This persons habit of staring distracted me terribly and yet I said nothing and here he had the nerve to say I distracted him with my phone. Of course, I never said anything. I just didn't go back. Showed him! Not very mature, I know. My history worries me that I won't be able to do this no matter what surgery I choose. So often I give in to my food addiction in all its sneaky and not so sneaky ways. I hate to admit it but sometimes I don't even fight, I just give in. Yes, I plan to start seeing a therapist to help with my food issues but that is not an overnight fix. I'm playing with the idea of going back to OA (not the same local meeting, though!). Maybe they have a better online presence than before. I'm afraid that whichever surgery I choose will not curb my hunger. I can't stand to be hungry. It makes me feel sick and consumes my mind. I think if I were to ask my friends and family if they thought I could do this, most would answer no. Oh, they would support my efforts but they've all seen me start and stop so many diets and lifestyle changes. After all, I already have a lap band and that didn't work. Granted, only one person aside from myself really understands what happened with the lap band. She got hers right after me and had so many problems it was removed a few years ago. She's going to the seminar with me for support and because she's the most level headed person I know. I trust her to not get overwhelmed or confused with stats or data (I'm easily confused). Okay, one of my other friends might not be so supportive but I don't expect support from her. She generally takes every opportunity to remind me that she lost (and regained and lost and regained) her weight the old fashioned way - hard work and exercise! That's okay, I've lost and regained more than her over the last 30 years using the same methods. I'm just more tired of it than her. One of the other questions was why I thought I would be successful this time with the drastic diet and lifestyle changes. I answered that I would be seeing a therapist and spending a lot of time with the nutritionist. Which is true. I kind of feel like I know myself and WLS better this time. When I got the band, my reason was that I didn't want to be40 and still be fat. A good reason. I did a lot of reading on the lap band and felt that I would be successful because the band would get rid of my hunger and that would allow me to focus on working on my food issues. I knew I would have to work out still and watch what I ate but I would get full faster and not be hungry. Win! Of course, for various reasons it didn't work out like that and here I am, heavier than ever, trying to decide if yet another WLS is right for me and whether or not I'll just fail the same as I did with the lap band. Can I be stronger than my food addiction? Not just for a few months but really successful?

So my WLS seminar is this Saturday and I'm filling out my patient profile packet today (cause I'm a lousy employee). Whew, does it ask some hard questions. Like why have I been unsuccessful in the past and why I think I'll be successful now. I ALWAYS believe I will be successful, no matter what new weight loss plan I'm embarking on. Even the stupid ones. Am I always successful? Heck no. I am struggling with why I think I'll be successful this time, though. I'm actually quite worried I won't be. After all, I've failed each and every other time. I want to give a good, thoughtful and truthful answer, though. Part of me doesn't want to reveal my food issues in case they hold that craziness against me but part of my plan for success is to address those issues. And truthfully, its taken me all these years to realize I have food issues and just how strong their hold over me is. Hmmm ... this feels like a test!

In the end I just put that I will be seeing a psychologist to help with my food issues and self sabotaging and that I plan to work closely with the nutritionist to make sure I fully understand the post surgery diet. All of which are true. Yes, I was overthinking but I keep reading that WLS is not for people struggling with food issues. I don't fully understand that but I don't want the surgeons office to hold my food issues against me. Filling out the paperwork did get me thinking, though, and planning for after surgery.

How exciting for you! Good luck! Please let me know how the sleeve differs from the band once you get all healed.

Hate. Sent from my MT2L03 using the BariatricPal App

Just read your article - awesome and thanks so much for sharing your experience! Sent from my MT2L03 using the BariatricPal App

I haven't seen that episode but, for me, that show is like a wreck on the highway anyway; just can't stop watching. I cry, I laugh, I get beyond disgusted, but still I watch. At first, it was a there but for the grace of God thing. But then I started seeing some of my own issues in those people. They just stopped fighting (looked away I call it) a little longer than me. I do hate hearing some regress - it just seems so unfair when you've done something so drastic as surgery and then made so many changes. But that's addiction for you - always waiting quietly in the shadows for the tiniest slip and then not letting go. Sent from my KFTHWI using the BariatricPal App

This totally teared me up. Sent from my MT2L03 using the BariatricPal App

I currently have a lap band and am considering revision to either Gastric Bypass or Sleeve. I like the idea of the sleeve - no equipment left inside me and no unused stomach just hanging out doing nothing (hopefully). It just sounds cleaner. But I am a lap band "failure" (I fully admit it). I don't want to add sleeve "failure" to my resume. Both lap band and sleeve are restrictive. How does the sleeve work differently than the lap band? It certainly seems to be more effective from what I read but other than the actual surgery and removal of part of the stomach, I can't figure out how the two are different. I am scheduled for a WLS seminar on 16 April. It should cover both Gastric Bypass and Sleeve. But I'd like to have a good clue before the seminar. The last WLS seminar I went to was for the lap band and wow did it differ from the reality.

I've heard they are prone to failure before. Did your doc mean the equipment itself breaks or the band doesn't do as promised?

, Funny how different the band is for everyone. I guess I have technically not had any real issues with my band (slipping, gerd, etc.) but I never did experience a lessening of hunger. I was hungry just a few hours after surgery, actually. Sometimes I think I'm even hungrier with the band but I don't know how true that actually is.

I don't actually remember that one first moment. Seems I've always known I was fat. I can remember being a little girl and being ashamed that I weighed 70lbs, which was more than other girls. Docs would always lecture my parents. My mom would make pig noises when I'd ask for seconds. School clothes shopping was always a nightmare. There were no junior plus sections back in the day. Everything and everyone made it pretty clear I was fat and not acceptable. Sent from my MT2L03 using the BariatricPal App

I got my lapband in 2008. I was not successful and had the Fluid removed in 2011. For several months I went back and forth about getting another fill. My memories of the time when I had fluid in my band are not good although, if I'm truly honest, nearly every memory I have of food getting stuck involves me eating something that I should not have or that is known to not work well with the band. I finally decided to get a fill a couple of weeks ago and today was the day. I was so nervous. My original surgeon is no longer with the practice so I saw another doc and was quite impressed with him. He was very motivating, didn't make me feel weird or like a failure and I really feel like he is interested and cares about my progress. Not so much with the other doc but I'm one of those patients who can barely talk in the doctors office. I got about 2 cc's in my 14 cc band. I felt a little shivery inside on my way home but fine otherwise. I just ate a half bowl of cream of potato Soup and I feel kind of full. I really wanted more but I am fighting it. I've been doing really well for the last few weeks of working out and I'm really proud of myself and happy that I have given myself the opportunity to do well with my eating, as well. It is rare for me to do well with both at the same time. So, that is my lapband story.