Tootles1975

I'm so glad people have continued to chime in here. I've always been someone who's somewhat resistant to change and needs to think through the pros and cons of any big decisions quite a lot before taking an action. I can be a ditherer and want to keep paddling down the river of denial often. Sometimes it just helps to hear that others were unsure too. I'm encouraged that my worries are normal and that many of you had the same fears, yet forged ahead despite them and have no regrets and consider this the best decision of your lives.

I have a combination business/pleasure trip to New Orleans coming up in a few days, and when I return, I plan to call for my consult with the surgeon's office. Thank you all for your help.

Thank you so much to everyone for your open, honest, and thoughtful responses. I'm taking to heart all that you've shared, checking into the resources you've mentioned, and doing more thinking and self-examination. I know this is the next step for me in all likelihood, and I'm growing more comfortable with the decision each day, the more I learn and hear from others. I sincerely appreciate your candor and concern.

Hi all,

I'm brand new to the forum (though I've been lurking and reading the past month or so). I'm 38 and 339 pounds. I've been heavy my whole life, since childhood, and 10+ years ago I was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. I also have poor circulation and edema in my legs that necessitates wearing medical compression stockings all the time. I've successfully lost 75 lbs (on a low carb diet of my own design) in 2002 and 60 pounds (on Weight Watchers in 2012) in the past, but eventually gained back all of the weight plus the first time and most of the weight the second time around. I'm finding it harder to keep my fasting blood sugar numbers under control and I know it will only continue to get even more difficult as I age.

My PCP recommended I look into WLS two months ago. I've been researching since then and attended the seminar on April 9. I've learned a lot, and rationally, I know the surgery is my best chance at a healthier future. I have a good friend who was about the same weight (less health issues but knew they were coming) and had bypass surgery 3 years ago and has been the picture of success -- lost half her body weight and has kept it off, has had zero complications, has no food restrictions, looks and feels great. She's been a big inspiration.

But...the dreaded butt...I fear that I will be that person who has horrible, life-threatening complications. I also fear that I won't be able to conquer the emotional attachments I have to food and will feel deprived and restricted eventually after the honeymoon stage wears off. (I'm also looking into ways to recognize and break down those emotional ties and triggers now.) It even makes me a little sad to think that I won't if I wanted to be able to eat a huge meal on a holiday or a special occasion. The idea that the rest of my life will not be the same is both exhilarating AND frightening.

Before I saw my friend's success with my own eyes, I don't think I would've even considered surgery. It still scares me sometimes to think about the long-term possibilities of basically chopping off more than half my stomach. I've read that people who have an easy time for it for the first five or even ten years, sometimes have terrible problems after that.

I know a lot of people say the risks are worth the misery of being fat. I don't know that I've ever considered myself to be miserable though. I've certainly had many terrible moments because of my size over the years, but overall, I've always been a fairly confident person, I'm happily married. I feel I've lived a pretty happy, successful life thus far. I dieted off and on over the years but mostly off to be honest, and only with any real conviction on two occasions (mentioned above)--both of which were prompted by bad medical news that scared me. Part of me feels like maybe I should have struggled more/tried harder before attempting surgery, despite intellectually knowing that dieting is a losing game for most obese and esp. super obese folks. I wonder if I need to want this more to be really successful at it.

I'd say I'm about 85%, maybe 90% on the best days, convinced that I need to do this. How do I get to 100%? Do I even need to get there? Or do you just have to recognize that this is the best option you can take to ensure better health and push the remaining fear aside and take that leap of faith?

I'd love to hear your stories of how you finally made the decision to do this. Thanks.