Rogofulm

What a great philosophy!!! Good luck with your surgery, and it sounds like you're going to really enjoy your journey!

@ Your posts make me worry about the flip side of the coin. Instead of focusing on what you see in the mirror, try looking at pictures of the new you. Especially pictures with other people in them. You should see that you look terrific, and not any heavier than the others in the pictures. I know that the "me" that looks back from the mirror, especially without clothes, still has "baggage", but the me in pictures is looking a whole lot better. And one more thing.... Are you sure that all that "fat" you still see is not just skin? If you can't get past this negative self-perception, please see a counselor. Good luck!

My doctor says that Protein is the best way to prevent hair loss. I'm 4.5 months out and down 83 pounds, and it hasn't happened – yet. Doc thinks that if it hasn't started already, I should be able to avoid it. (Fingers and eyes crossed!) My barber confirmed last weekend that so far, so good. So all I can say is that 95% of what I've eaten in the past 5 months is protein, protein, protein. And I take a Biotin pill every night, just in case that helps too.

Hell no, I don't mind being called "Skinny"! I'm not actually skinny yet, but I'm getting there... I do try to avoid using that word around my young daughter, though. I've told her that even though we joke about my getting "skinny", I'm not really trying to get to that. I'm trying to get to a "healthier weight". Don't want to give her body-image issues.

Thanks, Susan!!! Current weight: 182 Challenge goal weight: 166

Again, remembering that I'm no shrink.... I can't speak to your privacy issues – I'm pretty much an "open book" kind of guy. That being said, here are my thoughts on how to approach sharing your story if you decide to do so.... I don't know if your group has discussed the surgery solution or not. Are they even aware of that option? Let's assume that the subject has never seriously come up, because otherwise they would already suspect that's what you've done. If you decide to open up about your surgery, you may want to tell them together. That way they can get their initial reactions out immediately, and right in front of you. If you tell them separately, the first thing they'll do is call each other and have a conversation about you, which could spiral into negativity. The more information they have before they talk to each other about you, the better! I think I'd invite them over for coffee, tea, a game, or something, and when everyone was relaxed (not with booze), I'd start with something like, "I know you guys have probably wondered how I'm losing weight so quickly." Then explain how miserable you were at your former weight. And then, "Well I have a confession to make...." (They may start to figure it out now.) You might couch your reluctance to share the news with them as being embarrassed about having the surgery. (That doesn't have to be true, it's just diplomatic.) Explain that you have since learned, through a bariatric forum and support group meetings, that there's no reason to be ashamed. That it's a wonderful tool that has been proven to be very effective at helping people lose weight and keep it off. And that you wish you had had the nerve to tell them sooner. You might also tell them that you'll never push it on them, but that if they have any questions, you'll be happy to answer them as best you can. And that you sincerely hope that you can continue to be close, but that your eating habits need to completely change now. That doesn't mean you can't hang out, just that you'll be making different food choices than you would have made before. And promise not to judge anyone else's food choices! I think the longer you can keep the conversation going, and the more questions they ask, the better the chance that they'll end up being supportive of your decision. I have found that many people are fascinated by the topic! If they're really interested, sometimes I describe the 3 types of surgery, and even draw simple diagrams about how they work. Your friends may or may not want that much detail. It all depends on how threatened they feel by the subject. But you know them best, so you'll sense how they're reacting. And finally, if you want to, you can say, "You know I'm kind of freaky about privacy stuff, so I'd really appreciate it if you could keep this to yourselves. I wanted you two to know, but I really don't want to share it with the rest of the world." Whew! Okay, so that's how I would tackle your situation. Personally, I've opted to share my decision with anyone who asks how I'm doing it. "Clean living, diet, exercise [pause].... and bariatric surgery." (It usually get a laugh!) Again, good luck! I hope you are able to maintain the friendships, but it's even more important that you succeed in your weight loss journey!!!

Wow! I never even knew there were sizes. Guess I should ask him in January at my 6-month. Not sure why, but it seems better to know more about your situation than less, right? Hmmm...

I'm no psychologist so this is purely my point of view, but I'm afraid this has the potential to get tricky for you. Your weight loss is likely to be so extreme that eventually you'll end up "confessing" that you had surgery, if only to explain how it's possible for you to do what seems to be impossible. I mean, our quick weight loss looks like magic! I just wonder if the longer you wait, the more negative their reaction might be to the fact that you kept it a secret from them, especially since they face the same challenges that you used to have. Will they feel blindsided? I mean, if your relationship is really that intimate, why didn't you confide in them about your surgery? I also wonder, since your friendship seems to have always revolved around food, about the long-term health of your relationship with them. Think about someone who gives up drinking... The best way to be successful is to quit hanging out with your drinking buddies. And conversely, the quickest road back to the slippery slope is to continue hanging out with them. So you have two potential issues: 1) your success might feel threatening to them and their lifestyle, and 2) their continued unhealthy relationship with food might be detrimental to the success of your program. With all that in mind, you may want to think about telling them sooner rather than later. (I'm sure others will disagree with me on this.) You've made a huge change for the better! Congratulations on that!!! I would just caution you about putting yourself in situations that might lead to less-than-optimal choices and results. Sorry to be a downer, but I truly wish you all the success in the world! Keep us posted, and good luck!!!!!

It may be a swelling and fluid-retention thing, or you may have reached The Dreaded Week-3 Stall a little early (which also involves Fluid retention). It's perfectly normal, and just about all of us have suffered through it. You're not crazy, and your doctor didn't screw up. In fact, you might not lose any weight for two weeks or more. But don't worry -- after that, the weight will start falling off if you stick to your program. And, the inches continue to come off even while the scale isn't budging. If you're interested, here's a good article that explains why it happens and why we all have to go through it. Hang in there. Pretty soon it'll be in the rear-view mirror and you'll be dropping weight again like crazy! (Apologies to BP regulars who have seen this repeatedly, but it's a big deal to those who are going through it!)

When your wife says that you feel "bigger" because there's less separating you!

Happy Birthday and congratulations on your success!!!!!

Below is a "typical" day's menu: As for carbs, mostly I get them from my shakes, Greek yogurt, and the very limited veggies I'm able to fit in after my Protein. Other doctors and nutritionists give you carb targets, but my doctor just says to limit them as much as possible. If you're not logging your food yet, I'd suggest using http://www.myfitnesspal.com/. It helps you keep track of your protein and fluids, but also can help you figure out if anything is going off track and affecting your weight loss. Okay, here's an example of my day: I keep a 2-quart jug and a 24-oz Tervis tumbler (with a handle) both at home and at work. I count my Breakfast Premier Protein shake as a meal, not a Fluid. (30 grams of protein) 30-60 minutes later, I have a cup of coffee. (Count it as a fluid if you like.) After that, I drink a 24-oz. tumbler of decaf, sugar-free iced tea, like Crystal Light throughout the morning. (Lots of frequent sips) Then I walk for 40+ minutes. Then it's lunchtime - tuna salad or chicken salad, or leftover protein from dinner. (16-22 grams of protein) and maybe a bite of veggies if there's room. About 45 minutes after lunch, I'll fill another 24-oz tumbler of iced tea and sip that throughout the afternoon, finishing by 30 minutes before my afternoon snack. At around 4:00, my afternoon snack is usually a Greek yogurt (12 grams of protein) or some leftovers. (This is also a good time to get in some veggies or a V-8 if you're getting enough protein at other times.) Maybe a cup of hot tea in the later afternoon. (Count it as a fluid you like.) Then dinner – again, getting 20-25 grams of protein from lean steak, fish, chicken, or pork, and maybe a bite or two of veggies. Finally, another 24-oz cup of iced tea or Water 30-45 minutes after dinner that I sip throughout the evening. If I'm hungry later, sugar-free Jello or sugar-free popsicles are good. And if I'm short on protein or still hungry, another yogurt or protein shake. (I'm not worried about the calories because this menu only provides 700-900 per day.) So that's 70+ grams of protein and 72+ ounces of fluid, with some exercise as well. If you have a regular enough schedule, you can follow it every day. If not, maybe a modified version will work. An here's my secret weapon – Beef Jerky! (Or turkey.) A 3-ounce bag provides 30-39 grams of protein, and almost no fat for around 200-240 calories. Yes, there's sodium, so if that's a problem for you this may not work. When I'm super busy and eating meals in my car, a bag of Jerky will get me through. Lately I've been away from home for a lot of meals, and some days I practically live on jerky. And I still lose weight. But you've gotta keep getting the 64+ ounces of fluid in every single day. The big trick is in pre-planning your meals and your fluids, especially if you're going to be away from home or work. In those cases, I always make sure there will be something I can eat, or I bring along a Protein shake or some kind of meat to carry me through. I've also gotten pretty good at restaurant eating. I avoid the bread and salad, order chicken, steak, lamb, fish, or pork, trade in the starch for a second veggie, skip the dessert.... and end up taking half of the meat, and almost all of the veggies home. I know we need to learn to eat "normally", but I'm not there yet – especially when it comes to carbs. When I get to goal weight, I'll work on finding my new low-carb "normal". Hope that helps! Rog

Congratulations! You have reached The Dreaded Week-3 Stall. It's perfectly normal, and just about all of us have suffered through it. You're not crazy, and your doctor didn't screw up. In fact, you might not lose any weight for two weeks or more. But don't worry -- after that, the weight will start falling off if you stick to your program. And, the inches continue to come off even while the scale isn't budging. If you're interested, here's a good article that explains why it happens and why we all have to go through it. Hang in there. Pretty soon it'll be in the rear-view mirror and you'll be dropping weight again like crazy! (Apologies to BP regulars who have seen this repeatedly, but it's a big deal to those who are going through it!)

Premier Protein..... chocolate flavor..... same as yesterday..... and the 147 days before that.

On the plus side my anesthesiologist is a cutie! Of course he is who else would you want staring at your big ol belly lol! Thank you all in advance! After a hip replacement I developed a theory that after major surgery they send in the cutest nurse to remove your catheter. Does she know about "shrinkage"?!!

Holy smokes! You guys look terrific!!! Congratulations!!!!

I've always been a believer in tact and diplomacy. "Honey catches more flies than vinegar", as they say. Maybe I don't get as much crap as a lot of people. But maybe that's because I try to live life as a basically nice guy. That's not to say that I take crap from people. If they step over my line, I tell them, "Okay, that was the line and you just crossed it. Please step back over it and stay there." Just today someone tried to tell me that I don't need to lose much more weight after I told them I still had 29 to go. She said, "I'll let you know if you're getting too thin." And I said, "That won't change my plan. I still intend to make my goal." But I said it in a friendly tone of voice. And she understood and backed off. I guess basically I just don't like a$$holes, so I don't want to become one. It's a choice.

Have you started using http://www.myfitnesspal.com/ (MFP) yet? They don't have nutritional information specific to The Clock, but they have lots of restaurant grilled chicken salads listed. Pick one that's probably close to the one you had. As with all salads, though, most of the calories are in the dressing. For example: Longhorn Steak House has great salads, right? But if you look at the nutritional info on their dressings, their Balsamic Vinaigrette is 270 calories with 29 grams of fat. Yikes! Add that to a steak salad and you're up near 1,000 calories in one meal! By comparison, their Bleu cheese dressing "only" has 160 calories and 15 grams of fat. But the Raspberry Vinaigrette has only 60 calories and 0.5 grams of fat, plus 14 grams of carbs. So if you haven't already, do try logging your food on MFP. You'll be amazed at how easy it is to track your daily intake and exercise. Good luck!

I'm afraid you don't have much choice. Chewing food to death is part of what we signed up for. Whenever I eat too quickly, it gets stuck and has to come back up. Besides, eating too much, too fast is part of what got us here. And as for not being able to eat the things we used to love.... Well, that's kind of the point, isn't it? I doubt that many of us got here by loving only lean Protein and green vegetables. Don't meant to be harsh, but changing our old patterns is the only way we're going to succeed. Of course, it's hard while managing the little ones, but many others have done it. So search around this forum and maybe you'll find out how they did it. I wish you all the success in the world!!!

As others have said, it's all about hydration. Get those fluids in! All stool softeners do is make it easier to absorb Water, and thus soften the stool. Miralax worked for me when I had a severe problem about 6 days out, but it can take a couple of days to do the trick. Now I take a psyllium husk capsule (Fiber Therapy at Wal-Mart) twice a day to stay as regular as we're gonna get, which is not necessarily daily...

Don't freak! Stalls happen to different people at different times. "Most people" have it around weeks 3-5, but if it happens early, maybe you'll get past it more quickly too. Trust your gut *LOL*. You'll be fine, and the weight will start falling off soon.

This is a really interesting topic! My wife gets on me because while I love the compliments, I usually deflect them with a, "Yeah, but I still have a ways to go." Or, "Yeah, but I'm no longer filling out my wrinkles, so I look like a shar pei dog." And when I walk by a mirror or other reflective surface, my eyes go straight to the (now smaller) soft roll around my belly. Why do we do this??? Is it being hyper-critical of ourselves? Or is it just that we want so badly to get to the new place that we critique our progress harshly during the trip? Realistically, I know that I look and feel a whole lot better. Everybody keeps telling me how much better/healthier/happier I look. So why do I deflect it? Must be old habits dying hard! BUT...I will say that now that I'm within sight of my goal, I'm beginning to accept that this IS the new me -- wrinkles and excess skin and all. So in the past couple of weeks, I've started responding more positively with, "Thanks for noticing, I feel great!" That's the message we should be telling ourselves!!! So, I guess as they say.... "Fake it 'til you make it." Accept our changing selves as we are right now, and be proud of our accomplishments all along the way. Don't obsess over what's not there yet, because if we can keep to the program and make good choices, we'll eventually get to our goals (or close enough to be comfortable). And during the journey, we need to work hard to learn and internalize new habits that will help us to eat healthfully for the long haul. That's my hope, anyway.....

Go for it! If possible, though, don't be in the kitchen area when you get home. You won't want to eat, but the smells might make you nauseous. Congrats on making a great decision for your life!!!