want_so_bad

i appreciate everyone's responses. i seem to have good days and then blue days. i am pretty sure this is normal.

topdown---i too get that, "what have i done?" feeling, but i know it is worth it. and this is the hard part. i think i have read that it is referred to as bandster hell? that is so true!

i KNOW this is the best thing i have done for myself. i KNOW this is a tool that i must use, not a magic cure. its just hard to do what i am doing and not see a loss, does that make sense? oh i am sure it does, each of you is going through, or has gone through this same thing.

my hubby isnt supportive, so i cant vent any of this to him. thank you all for the encouragement and feedback. good to know i am not alone.

my time-table is to lose this in a year. a year! and when i see those couple pounds bouncing back up and down and up and down on the scale, it is discouraging. but i know that i am only 4 weeks out, and 2 weeks from my first fill, when i will really start working this band! and then i will see results.

thanks again to everyone. it helps to know i am not alone in my misery and questioning and the highs and lows.

ok, so i was down like 20-21 lbs or so. this morning that damn scale said i had gained like 2 back. WTH? plus, i thought i would be fitting into smaller pants. i do, but they are kinda tight. i guess i just thought that down 20 pounds would make more of a difference in my pants? i dont know. i am feeling really blue the last couple days. i am on mushies. i just want to eat. i know its in my head...

i think i just need some words of encouragement, or maybe a good swift kick in my butt.

i am finally getting an appetite back. i am scared to death that i will gain back the weight i have lost before my first fill on the 15. i know this is suppose to be the healing period and not the loss period, but omg, what if i gain that back? i am having horrible head games with myself! why cant i get past this? this is so much more a head thing then i expected! any tips on what to do to get past it?

i am 3 weeks out today. i have the strangest noises going on. whenever i eat or drink anything, no matter how small the sip, i get these "man burps" as my sister says. deep rumbling belches. and then, quite often i get this sound/feeling like its passing through. is this normal? there isnt any pain. i try to make myself be mindfull of not swallowing too much air. any ideas? tips? from what i have read this seems to be normal? is this a forever type thing w/ the band now?

i have noticed it in my face too! my double chin is disappearing. i have to tuck my chin in to my chest to get the roll to show up nowadays! omg, its great!

on the down side, i swear my boobs are already shrinking! i knew they would, but come on girls, try and hang in there! just for a little while, momma needs ya!

my pants are seriously baggy too. i think i could fit into a smaller size...i have a few at home i think i will try tonight.

first, a quick background... my dh is not supportive of this at all. he has never been one to acknowledge any weight i may have lost or any of that sort of thing.

that said...

this morning, he actually told me i was getting skinnier! holy crap, i about died. seriously. i pretended like i didnt hear him and said, what? and he repeated it. and i had a second round of heart failure. :faint:

it has just totally made my day and i had to share.

it does get better. slowly. day by day. there were days i didnt think i could drink another thing, and yet i did. and here i am now starting on mushies. there were times i thought, "what have i done?", and more then a few break down moments with tears. but, i am so glad i had this done. i see a light at the end of a lifetime struggle with my weight.

for something to chew...i chewed ice...it was SO good..lol umm, what else? i had the broth from different flavors of Soup. i didnt think there would be much difference, but there really was. i made wassabubble's recipe for olive garden fagoli (sp wrong, sorry) soup. my family loved it and i loved the broth. the broth from beef veggie soup was really good too. oh, sucking on hard candies was good too.

i still have moments where i struggle. but i think to myself, i CAN do this. i know i can. and i know you can too. be strong!

Hmm... I think I waited like 2 weeks or so. DH was a little afraid to touch me before that, and although I recovered quickly, my port (in the middle of my abdomen) stayed sore for a while. It's been a while since I was banded, but I do remember sticking to either "doggy style" (I hate calling it that) , where we're laying on our sides, or me on top backwards. These seemed like the least likely to irritate my port area.

i was wondering about doggy style, (and i hate callin it that too!), i didnt know if it would be uncomfy, w/ my belly being sore, and then hangin (yucky mental pic for ya there, sorry), ya know? good to know it worked for you. i was thinkin the on our side thing would be good.

i guess i will let ya know what worked tonight tomorrow.

every passing day finds me feeling better and better. i am not as tired in the afternoons, not as sore. all my incision are healing nicely, i have some drainage from the port site, but they said that is normal and expected.

today i am wearing jeans! i hadnt yet b/c they irritated my one incision when i sit and i sit alot at work. but, today, i did the rubber band trick from when i was prego and its working great. besides they are falling off already! even when i have them butttoned right, they are big! i am so excited. already thinking of all the new clothes i will get to buy. :whoo:

i start mushies in a few days. i am surprised that the liquids havent been as hard as i thought. dont get me wrong, i have had my occassional melt down and wanting of "real" food, but its ok. i am ok. i am good. i am losing!

good to know... my dh will be home tonight!!! yippeeee.....

better keep to the easy going lovie dovie stuff for now.....see how it goes...lol

thanks for all the responses

ok, so.... anyone told how long to wait to resume sex? or any tips? i mean, well, you know what i mean...

certain position that didnt hurt your stomach? i have been thinkin, and for right now, missionary would be out...lol...please dont be offended! this might could be a kinda fun thread??!!??

hello everyone. i live in wyoming. i have been married for 2 1/2 years. i have 3 kids...an 8yr old stepson, a 7 year old son, and an 8 month old daughter. nothing like starting all over! she was a surprise to say the least...but wouldnt change it for the world now that she is here! we have 5 horses, 2 cats, ok, 3, since we seem to have adopted the little wild one, and 1 dog-he is a blue heeler/border collie mix.

i am so excited to get this extra weight off and regain my confidenence riding again. i miss the old me! when i was thinner i could ride and ride w/ no problems. now i am extremely worried all the time about everything jigglin that shouldnt and it makes it not as enjoyable.

there are only a select few who know that i had this surgery-my dh, my mom, my 2 sisters, and my best friend since high school. i get unbelievable support from my mother. thank goodness, cuz i get none from my hubby. he is who he is, but i still get upset about it. oh well though. between my mom and this place, i will make it.

nice to meet everyone...

yes, i am seriously lovin his new song right now. there are so many more...josh turner, dierks, billy currington, brooks and dunn, and on and on...

but i must say, that george is king! i hope to see him in concert...i would then be complete..lol.

my m-i-l makes this at big family bbq's, just slightly different. she uses raspberry Jello and also adds in (frozen) raspberries. very very good! i hadnt even thought of this! thanks!

george strait, gary allan, kenny chesney, rascal flatts....

well, last night i had some cream of potato Soup, minus the chunks of course. and when i say some, i think maybe like 6 spoonfuls. but omg it was heaven. and i felt better. i also went for a walk, and, although i was huffin and puffin after, it was good.

i am feelin kinda better today. not so desperate. still have the hiccupy things, wtf is that? but last night i burped some hellaious burps and, even though they kinda hurt, was SO relieved!

i also figured out last night i could drink a little more w/ each swallow then i was and i was ok. that has been a huge relief today as well. last night i mixed a little white grape juice w/ Water and it was really good. kind of a nice change. every time i got up with the baby, i drank a few swallows.

i have some belly achin today, but nothin like yesterday yet.

oh, i have a question...i was kind of lactose intolerate before, but now am really really bad. anyone had soy milk? any suggestions which ones to try? that lactaid crap isnt helpin AT ALL! no wonder i feel dehydrated..the rate at which it goes in and it just comes right back out! lol.

glad to hear i wasnt alone in my misery. i know we can do this fellow tenacious ones! buck up cupcake, and keep on ridin.....

hope everyone else is having a better day

i am one week post-op. i have this very quesy feeling pretty much all the time now. i have been sippin, trying not to swallow air. any suggestions?

ok, so i am really going to put this out there in hopes of getting some support/advice/you-poor-thing/it will get betters....lol maybe even a buck-up cupcake or two...just having a hard time the last couple days.

i feel like crap. it has been one week since surgery and i just feel like crap. usually, in the mornings, i feel pretty good. but by afternoon, i just want to curl up in a ball and cry. my stomach hurts. i am sip sip sippin all i can, which is about nothing. i have these weird burp/hiccup things that are kinda stuck, but will occansionaly come up..either way, it hurts. gas-x isnt working. tums isnt working. i had an allergic reaction to the damn adhesive on the bandages covering my incisions and now i have big red welts across my stomach that hurt/itch.

yes, i am being a whiny-ass baby.

i know i wont feel this way when i am feeling better, farther out...i know i can make it. but right now, i am thinkin, WHAT HAVE I DONE? i know my mind is playin serious games with me. why cant i deal better? i knew this was gonna be hard, but not freakin like this. my does my stomach hurt so much? why am i so tired?

well, thanks for listening to me whine. i could go on and on, but this has been embarassing enough...

i had been using gas-x strips but didnt think they were doing much...but i think i will try again. with any luck it will. thanks for the reminder!

but i seem to work up a sweat doing relatively easy things, like changing the baby, or getting ready for work...hope this goes away!

i was banded on the 4th too, but my problem is the opposite! i just go and go...

sorry i cant be of help. and if anyone has any suggestions for me?? not to hijack your post....sorry!

(in general, i know everyone is different) and how can i tell when its going away? is that why i am starting to feel hungry now? and i am SO freakin thristy, this sip sip sip thing doesnt seem to keep me hydrated. any suggestions on what to try?

i get this icky pukey feeling and it feels like i need to burp but cant. it really makes me feel just bad. any suggestions? walking doesnt seem to help. i am still on Clear Liquids, and have been super careful not to drink fast or gulp. it sometimes feels maybe like hearburn too, but the tums dont do anything for it. is this just a soon-after-surgery type thing? anyone else experiencing this? please help. any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

how is the taste? which flavor do you use? i am having a hard time gettin in my protein...so far the shakes i have tried taste like crap! i think its a head game too...any suggestions would be great!

please please, drink all you can. i got dehydrated. i cant explain to you what hell it was. i thought i was gonna die, wished it, more like it. everything hurt, i was dizzy,super tired, and did i say how bad everything hurt?

yesterday and today i am sipping all i can and am feeling much better. i wont let that happen again!

good to see everyone doing so well. i am still pretty sore around the port incision. the other incisions are itching like crazy, so thats good=healing, right? omg, at times its driving me crazy, lol.

a few small words of advice...DRINK DRINK DRINK! i got dehydrated and yesterday was utter hell. i hurt so bad all over, was SUPER nausated, dizzy, and just felt like crap. i was seriously thinking, WHAT HAVE I DONE? i took some anti-nausea meds, sipped all i could all day, and slept. i feel so much better today. but am gonna be damn sure i drink enough! that was horrible and i dont want to go throught that again.

on a good note, today i, carefully and gingerly, picked up my sweet baby girl for the first time since i got home. i have held her since then of course, but i picked her up myself today. a little pain, but not bad.

good luck to everyone!