Daydra

I was there nearly 10 years ago. It's totally normal. For me, however, I was signed up for gastric bypass at an army hospital. I went through all the requirements, and decided I was uncomfortable with the surgeon and the facility and the procedure was too much change to my body and ultimately decided not to do it. I was in my mid twenties. I know now that at that time, I wasn't ready to make the changes that would have been required. I'm really glad I made the decision to step back at the time, because I believe I would not have taken it seriously enough to make it a life change, and I now have the option of the sleeve which I am MUCH more comfortable with than bypass. I'm now 36 and I know the difference between being ready and not. This time I went through all of the requirements that I had control over and didn't have to wait on someone else to schedule or submit within 7 days of calling for my first consultation appointment (I'm self-pay, so that's easier than if you have to wait on insurance...)

No one can make the decision of whether or not you are ready but you, but either way, a certain amount of questioning is completely normal and appropriate. This is an enormous life change. There will be a lot of emotion that comes with it. My nerves this time are more like excitement butterflies, like what I feel the first time I am about to start a race on a course I've never been on before or step up to a longer distance (can I really do this?), where last time, it was an underlying knowledge that I wasn't ready for the change. If you need help sorting out what you're feeling, I would seriously consider consulting a therapist a couple times to talk through it. A therapist is unlikely to tell you whether you are ready or not to commit to the work and changes that will be required, but they'll be able to help you examine what you're feeling and what it might mean.

Rest assured, what you're feeling is totally appropriate. I would be more worried about it if you weren't at least a little nervous about the changes that are coming. And don't forget, you have time. You can try a diet while you wait for approval and you could delay your surgery for a little while to give yourself a little more time to figure it out.

Best of luck as you consider the right thing for you,

dd

Best of luck to you on whichever procedure you choose. I had the choice of 4 options (band, plication, sleeve and bypass) My insurance would have covered either the band or the bypass, I would have had to pay out of pocket for plication $14000 or sleeve $20000.

I did not choose the band because the success and rate of loss were only a little higher than 1/2 as good as the bypass or sleeve based on a meta analysis I located on PubMed. Also, I wasn't too excited about having a medical device implanted and the risk for slippage, herniation, etc.

I did not choose bypass because of the rerouting of the digestive system and the skipping of a section of the system and the high risk of nutritional deficiencies in the future (and let's not forget everyone's favorite "dumping syndrome"). Then there is the increased rate of complication. (My surgeon validated my concern and said that she felt that because some complications happen so long after the bypass is done, that the patient doesn't go back to the original surgeon so the complication may not get reported as such. It was really just more than I was prepared to allow. Based on the same PubMed abstract, it was only slightly more successful than the sleeve.

I did choose the sleeve because it had a success/loss rate near the bypass, and the complication risk is lower. I'm more comfortable with having a section of my stomach removed than the other options. Also, there is the added benefit of the removal of the portion of the stomach that produces grehlin (hunger hormone, if you haven't gotten that far in your research). My surgeon validated my choice and said that if she had to have it done herself, she would pick the sleeve.

Plication is still in the study stage ad my clinic. I'm just not comfortable with that...

I felt strongly enough about choosing the sleeve over the other two common options that I was willing to pay $20k over having my insurance pay 100% of the cost of either band or bypass (I have double coverage...).

As far as your timeline goes, do you know what your insurance is going to require you to do to qualify? Both companies I have required a 6 month medically supervised diet. In their terms, that didn't mean Weight Watchers, or multiple appointments to discuss weight management with my primary, or anything that made any modicum of sense. They wanted me to go to a doctor/nutritionist/whatever of their choosing for 6 months starting at the time the request was submitted (no credit for "time served"!). That played into my decision to pay out of pocket as well. I've made my decision, I'm not willing to fiddle-fart around for another 6 months to make my insurance company happy. Sorry, digressed a bit there... Anyway, if you have to do a 3, 6, or 12 month additional diet, Hawaii may be tough. Although, dieting in HI is pretty dang easy. There are grilled fish choices literally everywhere and it's super easy to be active.

From what I've read so far, you probably won't be cleared for activity much more strenuous than walking for about 2 months, and it might take 6 weeks (I think that's what I read???) for your largest incision to fully heal.

Hope this helps.

(Full disclosure: I'm pre sleeve, but my research is pretty fresh in my mind...)

Best of luck to you on your surgery and your new life!!!

dd

This is such a personal choice. I hope that your fear of telling isn't motivated by embarrassment. It is admirable that you are doing what you need to do to improve your health and quality of life.

I'm extremely fortunate. Over the years I have cultivated really good friendships (and it doesn't hurt that my circle of friends consists of nearly entirely therapists and social workers). They have all watched me struggle with my weight and work extremely hard to lose and keep off anything I might have lost. I also have a work group that are just an unbelievable awesome team. There will always be hateful and judgmental people out there, but I hope that you have at least a few people in your life that you trust enough to tell. You can do it alone, but it will be easier, emotionally in particular, if you have some support.

Fortunately, there is definitely a shift happening from thinking of weight problems as a matter of poor behavior to looking at it like a disease process. Someday, society with look at this as a medical condition that is exacerbated by our ridiculous food culture, and not some failing on the patient's part, but it's too bad paradigm shifts happens so slowly.

Wishing you the best!

dd

Mine's 7 days, 870kcal/day. Basically the "slim fast" diet. 3 or 4 Protein shakes a day and 1 meal of either 230 or 380 kcal for dinner with the goal of losing 10 pounds in one week. (No sweat, right? That's only 1000 calories below my resting metabolic rate each day. Hopefully I won't have to exert myself during that time...) Good thing the payoff is worth it.

What are you guys being directed to do.

I'm willing to go so far as to say as long as it's not someone else's husband's breadstick...

And safety is job 1!!!

Correction! If its your husbands breadstick, (like Chinamamas was) it's ok

I'm willing to go so far as to say as long as it's not someone else's husband's breadstick...

This is what my surgeon told me... "For the love of God, if you don't do anything else, give the post op diet 100% compliance."

The reason that you are on liquids only right now is that the only thing holding your stomach together right now is staples. Neglecting to follow the post op diet could do extreme damage. Your tissues are probably still swollen, so solids will not easily fit/pass through. If you stretch your stomach anywhere, that staple line could leak, and we all know those are bad, bad, bad. A bad leak could literally kill you or put you in the hospital for months. Sorry to be Debbie Downer, but there is real risk to not following the post op diet.

Having said that, you mentioned pain. Someone already suggested this, but you really might be well advised to call your surgeon's office. Better safe than sorry. They would much rather hear from you that find out later that you had a complication that could have been more easily corrected if it was detected earlier.

Best of luck, hope that you feel better soon. If it is just hunger, it will pass eventually. (usually sometime after you pull all your hair out, you head spins around in circles on your shoulders, and no family member wants to be in the same room with you any longer...)

dd

I am going to wait like you Scrubs are not cheap lol She is going to have to deal with my "frumpiness" lol

What about those silly little clippie things? (Clearly I have no clue what they might be called...) They're 4 inches long or so and have little suspender clips at each end. You could clip one to the back of your top to pull it in from the back. Probably will look kinda dumb from the back, but it'll probably buy you quite a bit of time before you actually have to suck it up and buy new ones. They would probably be found at a fabric store.

Congrats on your hard work!

My pleasure. Wish you the best.

Please forgive me for double posting if someone else has specifically mentioned this (I quit reading at page 4...).

Please, those of you that are experiencing feelings of loneliness, feeling down, feeling regret, can't figure out how you are going to live your life with these enormous changes that you are making, find a therapist that you feel comfortable with. There is nothing "wrong" with you, you are simply making a huge life change and there are going to be an unimaginable number of emotions (both good and uncomfortable) that are going to go along with that. Sometimes family and friends won't understand. Forums like this one can't substitute for a professional therapist. Having a full range of really strong emotions is completely normal with this big of a life change, and you will need to learn what they are trying to tell you and how to deal with them. A trained therapist can help with that. Maybe you are experiencing situational depression, or maybe you are simply overwhelmed right now by all the changes.

For many of us, our issues with weight is a result of other underlying emotional issues. That may not be the case for you, but there is a lot of emotion wrapped up in being overweight or obese. I expect that you will get hit with emotions periodically that you have no idea where they came from. After making such an enormous change to better ourselves, we deserve happiness and contentment with our new lives and our new bodies. Don't forget that "we" includes "you". That's going take some work and support for our mind, as well. I hope that this post is taken in the love and support that it's offered.

Wishing happiness to all those struggling,

Daydra

Get a tri suit. This is a one-piece zip up the front spandex athletic number that triathletes wear that can go from the lake to the bike to the run all without changing clothes. I do sprint and olympic distance races over the last 4 years at weights ranging from about 315 to 245. Danskin makes triathlon apparel, but I don't find their quality that great. Try www.teamestrogen.com and search for tri suit. Depending on your height and weight, you likely won't need a plus size tri suit. I'm 5'8" and weigh about 285 right now and I think I can still manage to fit into some of my tri suits that aren't plus size. If your weight on your banner is accurate, I expect that you should fit an xl in most brands (they are spandex, remember). You want them as tight as possible without restricting movement or busting zippers anyway. You would probably be better off picking one that offers compression. You will spend a significant amount of money on this garment, but I'm telling you, it's worth every stinking penny to be able to be active. You will still bounce, but it will provide enough support that unless you do something ridiculous, it shouldn't be uncomfortable. At least that has been my experience.

Best of luck! (expect to spend $120 or so, unless you find a good deal)

Daydra

This would be fun but to far away. Western Washington but not in Seattle.

There are at least 3 of us Westsound/Olympic Peninsula. Perhaps if everyone gets organized to plan periodic events, members east of the sound might be willing to hop a ferry at some point. Also, I sometimes ride the Olympic Discovery Trail from Blynn to Port Angeles. Could be an opportunity to meet up at a coffee shop or something. (Although admittedly, I'm expecting to get scheduled for surgery in the next 30 days or so, so I don't imagine I'll be doing a lot of riding for a few months...)

Anyway, just some ideas.

I'm in! I just joined, so I'll look to see if there is anything set up yet!

Really glad to find this group!

dd

Dr. Bass in Lexington Ky. Including facility cost, anesthesia & surgeon fees, $8600. The recovery is significant. He said it will be 1-2 weeks before I feel like leaving the house & 6-8 weeks before I can go back to the gym. I've taken "before" pictures & I plan to post those & the after pictures for y'all.

Thanks for that post. I've been looking for "real" information on this for a little while. Looks like we're pretty similar in age, height and starting weight. I'm really interested in hearing how your surgery went. It looks like you are probably neck deep in recovery right now. I hope that everything went well and that you are feeling as well as can be.

Best of luck!

Daydra

Greetings All,

It appears that I have made the fatal error of deciding on this procedure before realizing that it isn't as easy to get covered. Both my Primary Health Insurance and Tricare cover bariatric surgery, but from what I'm reading, only RNY and LapBand, not VSG. I have read that there is some discussion that Tricare may cover in the near future with the advent of coverage by Medicare, but I don't want to wait for a decision on some unknown timeframe.

So, my question is this: Have any of you heard of getting authorization on VSG either through Tricare or another insurance carrier through some type of waiver process? I don't want to be funneled into a band, but I am unlikely to choose to pay out of pocket if the band is covered.

Thanks for any information or advice you can provide...

dd

Hi All!

My name is Daydra, and I just left a ridiculously long introduction on the 30something group, so I won't do it again here.

I have been a Navy Wife for nearly 15 years and we are stationed at Bangor (Washington State). My husband is on shore duty currently, which I am, of course, extremely excited about. We have managed to stay at the same duty station since we were married in 1999, which is extremely fortunate for us, since we've always been tied to the area by my family and by owning a home here. I am an Environmental Health Specialist (an inspector for local Board of Health regulations relating to solid waste, sewage, food, and Water quality.) and have been doing that for about the last 5 years.

I am currently working on fulfilling all of the requirements for my insurance and am pretty early in the process, but I did a "practice run" nearly a decade ago, so this is only new in that I'm planning a different procedure. I have my own insurance through my employer, so fortunately I have Tricare as my secondary insurance and should be well set up to choose where I go and not have many out of pocket costs. (I'm super thankful for that!)

Looking forward to getting to know all of you and can't wait to hear about all of your experiences!

dd

Greetings!

My name is Daydra (feel free to just use my initals "dd"). I'm 36 (well, close enough for government work anyway). I live west of Seattle, WA. I am extremely pleased to have found this community and am looking forward to meeting all of you.

A little (or a lot) about my weight loss background... I've been overweight my entire life and have no clue what it's going to be like to finally reach a normal weight. The first effort I made to lose weight was when my mom signed us up for Weight Watchers when I was 11. I've tried most types of diet plans, including Phen-fen when I was about 18, and most recently the HCG diet through my naturopath a couple years ago. Although I have been wildly successful at times, I never found any lasting success. The most weight I ever lost was 115 pounds from 2009-2011, but have gained about 60 of that back. My highest weight was 345, which was utterly miserable for me. About 7 years ago or so, I started the process of getting approval through the military medical system (my husband is in the Navy) to have gastric bypass done. I completed nearly all of the steps, but I really didn't like the surgeon I was assigned, didn't have a high level of trust for the hospital I would be at, and frankly, the whole process, potential complications, high potential for later nutritional deficiency, dumping syndrome, and the nature of bypass itself really scared the crap out of me. Ultimately, I balked and decided not to continue the process. Although I would really have loved to have been at a reasonable weight over the last years, but I am really glad that I didn't go through with it back then. I don't believe that I was ready at the time and could have been looking for a revision now.

Over the last four years, I have been involved with a group of really great women that train for triathlon together. We are all shapes, sizes, and ages and focus on the completion instead of the competition. It's been one of the best things I have ever done in my life. I am a different person than I was the last time I researched bariatric surgery, and feel that with increased life experience, athleticism, and determination that I can be successful with this for the rest of my life.

I have decided on the VSG, and am working toward fulfilling all of my insurance requirements for approval, but feel extremely settled this time with my decision.

An now... I'm just plain getting tired of typing (as I'm sure you are getting tired of reading), so I'll let it go at this. I'm sure there will be plenty of opportunity to discuss all of our shared and individual experiences in the future.

Best of luck to you all and I thank you for being here and making this space informative and supportive.

dd

Best of luck to you! There have been lots of supportive comments here, and the most important thing to remember is that emotional reactions are going to be a normal and expected part of the entire process. You are likely to be surprised at your reactions at various times during your journey. (I'm sure you haven't gotten to this stage in the process without becoming patently aware of that...) Going to support groups, as noted in previous responses, through your clinic (if they are available) is a great idea, and I am very thankful to have found this community as well. I would also add that it would probably be extremely helpful to find a therapist to help you sort out your feelings and reactions. Certainly not out of any mental health challenge on your part, but simply to talk it all out. I'm early in the process of getting scheduled for surgery, but losing weight in general seems to almost peel back a lot of emotions that we don't expect. I anticipate having a lot of emotions to address along the way, and having a tight circle of friends that are in the mental health field makes me comfortable in the knowledge that seeking out a professional sounding board and guidance most definitely does NOT mean that we have any sort of mental deficiency.

Congratulations and best of luck!

Wishing you unlimited support,

DD

(Yay! I survived my first post! Hope it is helpful and didn't come off like a know-it-all.)