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Butterflyhigh

Gastric Sleeve Patients
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Everything posted by Butterflyhigh

  1. Butterflyhigh

    Drinking through a straw

    I am one year post-op and occasionally drink through a straw. I have experienced no apparent consequences.
  2. Butterflyhigh

    Brave enough to cut hair SHORT now!

    I LOVE the pixi cut. It looks so flattering on you. When I hit goal I felt like I needed something new too. I've already done the short hair thing...hell, I've had my head shaved completley bald for two summers in a row, but I am now 2 years of growing it out and didn't want to start that process over again. So instead I went from a dark sultry brunette to a smoking hot blond. Weight loss + tan + blond hair= so much summer fun I can't stand it!!
  3. Butterflyhigh

    Sleeve at a 36.6 BMI

    I am a low BMI'er. My recovery was easy...no complications. My weight loss was fairly quick and steady. I hit goal in 6 months and am now 20lbs below that. Today is my one year sureversary. Some people here say that low bmi'ers loose weight more slowly...and that is somewhat true. You will not loose 20 lbs in one month, but you will reach goal sooner. In the first few months I was loosing apx. 10 lbs per month. Then it slowed to 8 for the majority of the middle months until I hit goal, then 2-4lbs lost per month since then. I am now 20lbs BELOW goal. Started at a size 16ish. Am now in 0's. It's been a pretty amazing transformation.
  4. Butterflyhigh

    What was your past slob memory

    One of my most shameful slob moments happened during the period of my life when I was struggeling through a divorce. I can't even remember what sent me off on this emotional eating binge....but it started at the Arby's drive-thru ordering a giant roast beef sandwich...then on to McDonald's for a 10 pc. McNugget, fish sandwich, and fries....then to Wendy's for a frosty ans spicy chicken sandwich...then to the last fast food joint before I hit my street which was Taco Bell for some soft taco's. I was eating food from a previous resteraunt while sitting in the drive-thru for the next resteraunt. I remember being so physically stuffed and sick with food, sick with shame, hate, and guilt, sick with self-loathing. Today I am exactly one year post-op and below goal. The most amazing part of this journey has been cutting the emotional hold that food had on me. Best decision I ever made.
  5. Butterflyhigh

    NSV: Size 0!

    Congratulations!! That is an amazing realiziation, isn't it? I hit size 0's a couple of months ago...unbelievable. It was never even a realistic goal/blip on my radar when I started this journey. Well done to you for your hard work!
  6. Butterflyhigh

    Is it CHEATING or is it a CHOICE?

    Choice. It's all choice. 90% of my choices are gold star healthy. However, 10% of the time I choose to have a cookie, or a carb instead of Protein, or a few bites of dessert. I don't think of that as cheating. I think of that as strategically choosing to eat unhealthy crap because the other 90% of my choices are healthy food and daily exercise. Many people with weight issues feel very out-of-control when it comes to food, and become good at ignoring the reality of their food addictions. The act of cheating is a negative, out-of-control type of behavior. I think that saying "I cheated" instead of "I chose" takes a lot of the personal responsibility off of the individual. It's mostly subconscious and the thought process goes something like this... Eating this pie is cheating. Cheating is an out-of control behavior. My cheat-eating is out of my control. I am not responsible for uncontrollable events. Hopefully, most people will realize BEFORE they have a wls that their eating and their emotions are all wrapped up together in an unhealthy mash-up of emotional pleasure, pain, reward, punishment, and coping. We use all sorts of unconscious tricks to protect our toxic relationship with food. Being a victim of uncontrollable events is a biggie when you're talking about a person's ability to take personal responsibility. Words and Language are very powerful. This is a great example of that.
  7. Butterflyhigh

    I am a foodie that got sleeved!

    I am a foodie too. Love to cook all sorts of ethnic dishes. Love to meld flavors. But after my surgery I was actually looking forward to "resetting" my tastes. I wanted to develop an appreciation for each food devoid of any additional flavors. It's been very cool!! Now that I'm 11 months post-op, I feel like I have a much smarter palette....like it's so much easier to identify each individual taste I experience with good food.
  8. Butterflyhigh

    How Long Does HeartBurns last?

    I had heartburn nearly daily for several monhs after surgery...maybe 9 or so. It was almost always because I wasnt chewing my food enough and eating too fast. It was a real motivation to SLOW DOWN while eating. I am now 11 months post-op and only occasionally have to eat tums or rolaids. It does resolve itself in most cases.
  9. Hi all! Basically the same story as the above posters. I am nearly one year post-op and it's been a total sucess for me. I've lost 20 lbs more than my initial goal weight. I went from a pant size 14-16 to my current size 0. Some low bmi'ers loose the weight more slowly than than higher bmi'ers. I lost very steadily and hit my goal of 147 around 8 months post-op. I am now weighing 127. The biggest thing I've learned that I would impart to all new comers is this....you've got to understand WHY you have issues with food. Where did they start, why do they continue. Reconize that your emotions are all wraped up with eating, chewing, and swallowing food. Reconize, Explore, and Readjust all the emotional and physical behaviors which lead you to make emotional food choices. Now, my biggest challenge is stoping the weight loss. My NUT said it is very rare that she's got to tell someone to stop loosing and fatten up their diet, but I am also one of the lowest starting bmi'ers they've worked with. I have to track daily to ensure I'm hitting 1500 calories...which is difficult and I usually am in the 1200 area. What a difference one year makes in terms of life's challenges! Sometimes this is still a bit surreal to me. Good Luck!! It's a hell of a ride.
  10. Hi everyone! Thought I should log in an update. I am now 11 months post-op. I've gotten through all the challenging transitioning and healing which takes place for a good nine months or so after surgery. Before/After Stats: (Surgery was performed on June 9th, 2014) Height: 5'6 Before Weight: 210 lbs (highest weight was 240) Current Weight: 127 Before BMI: 34 Current BMI: 20 Surgery Day Pant Size: 16 Current Pant Size: 2 or 0 Things went like this: I had my surgery. I followed my doctors orders. I didn't pay attention to stalls. I focused on Protein and hydration. I weighted myself daily but honestly didn't pay too much attention to the number, just checked to see that the pounds were still dropping. I never obsessed over anything, just enjoyed my journey into this new lifestyle, even the tough days. My biggest challenges: Definitely drinking enough fluids. I still struggle with getting 64 oz in!! Also I should do better about tracking my food consumption every day. (If I don't track, I don't eat enough) The hardest time for me: Even months after I added solid food it seemed like eating would never "feel" normal again. Always too full, always slightly queasy after eating, always getting things stuck in my esophagus, always dealing with heartburn. There were nights when I would just be so tired of feeling sick from eating food....but I always kept in mind that this was a temporary stage and that it would pass. It did. Now I can eat anything including Pasta, bread, red meat, chicken, and lettuce. Just very little amounts. What I wished I had done differently: Added strength training as soon as I was cleared for exercise. After loosing all of this fat I also lost a lot of muscle mass which led to that gaunt post-wls sickly look for a few weeks. Now I do yoga nearly 7 days per week. It would have been waaaaay better to have started earlier when I still had muscles to work with. Here is the most important thing I did: I worked very hard in the beginning to reset my entire relationship with food. I had to find new ways of coping with stress and new ways of rewarding myself. I did a lot of personal detective work to understand the why's and how's of my food addiction. Food to me now is just a tasty fuel for my body. Do I add good or bad fuel to my machine? Without having so many emotions interwoven with the act of chewing, swallowing, and stuffing food inside my stomach, it is now easy to choose the healthy fuel. The coolest thing so far: Honestly, it's the knowledge that I have just increased my life expectancy and long-term quality of life. That's a huge deal. I can see myself as an active, engaged, healthy, and youthful senior citizen. I'm only 37 but I feel like I've given myself the most loving gift possible...a healthy future. Other totally awesome things: I take up sooo much less space in the bathtub. I spend much less money when eating out. I am oftentimes the thinnest person in the room, which is so so weird. I no longer want to hide myself inside baggy sweaters. I am wearing tank tops without an added cover-up. I look 10 years younger!! I have beautiful cheekbones which were formerly hidden underneath a plump and chubby face. There is such a thing as a clavicle bone and I LOVE running my fingers along the ridge! Getting up off the floor is so much easier. Walking though a parking lot or up the steps is much easier. I CAN LEAVE FOOD ON MY PLATE which is something I could never do before and is now one of the most empowering choices I make on a daily basis. The downside: This cost a lot of money, $14,000 out-of-pocket. I went from a C breast cup to an A. I lost all my butt. Seriously, it's a sad situation about my ass...there is none. I lost all the excess fat, but also my womanly curves. I have a very loose wrinkly stomach and a saggy place where my butt used to be. I've spent a fortune in clothes and Protein drinks. It's been tough having to explain myself to family members. The downside in no way compares to the positive things that happened as a result of my wls. My current goal: Is to consume between 1500-1800 calories per day. My nut said to change gears and fatten up my diet. I am supposed to add carbs, calories, and fat. If I don't track I am only hitting about 900-1200 calories per day. I can only eat about 1 cup of food at the most. Now when I'm stressed I find it difficult to eat as opposed to binge eating my stress away like I used to. So believe it or not, my biggest goal at the moment is to stop the weight loss and maintain my current weight. I hope this can be helpful to those out there who are considering getting a wls, are struggling thorough those early days when all you can focus on is sipping broth and forcing down Protein shakes, and those who are scared to take the plunge. I feel this is the best decision I could have made for my current happiness, future health and quality of life, and to model healthy eating habits/behaviors/relationship with food for my two daughters. Good Luck to all of you beautiful and brave people!
  11. Hey everyone! Glad that this post was helpful. I want to post a before/after pic here as well. I'm so much thinner that there are times when I can't believe what I'm seeing in the mirror! Today was like that, so I snapped this picture. Before pic: 220 lbs, size 16 pants, 5 years ago After pic: 127 lbs, size 0 pants, 11 months post-op
  12. You look fabulous!! Keep it up...it's definitely working for you.
  13. Butterflyhigh

    low bmi still obese

    I was a low bmi at the time of surgery and have had really fantastic results. Very little recovery pain. Very few food intolerances. I had stalls here and there but never paid them any mind. They came and went and the weight continued to drop. Right now my daily focus is on hitting my hydration goal (I've always struggled with this) and taking in enough calories to maintain my weight. Who would have thunk...it's become hard work to eat 1000 calories per day! I am 5'6" Surgery day I was 197 lbs and size 16 pants. Eight months later I am 133 lbs and a size 2. I am coming to grips with the fact that I am a thin woman now. My friend said I looked tiny yesterday, and indeed..in pictures I see that I do look small and tiny. It's be so fun! Also challenging with lots of "head" work. Lots. But I am so happy to have done this at a low bmi. I could have waited a couple of years and gone back up to 240 lbs or waited until I was older and my kids were older. I could have waited until the health problems started showing up. But instead I decided to do something brave and unconventional to end the unhealthy food relationship I had and start with a blank slate. So far it's worked out well.
  14. WHEN does it go away? I'm nearly eight months post-op and still have these mighty belches that force their way out of me from the depths of my gut. It's crazy. I'll never get a boyfriend. My kids are tired of the belching. I am way over it too. I've made by dog jump in fright several times. Does that ever stop?
  15. Butterflyhigh

    Question about vomiting

    I've only thrown up a few times since surgery. The three times I remember doing it was because I just flat out ate too much food. This was happened in the early few months when one bite too many would cause so much uncomfortableness. To me it felt less like I was heaving food up from my stomach. It felt more like I was getting the backed up food out of my esophagus. These days (six months out) if I eat one bite too many I can just kinda stretch my body out and let that food settle down and digest. It still doesn't feel good, not at all, but I don't feel the need to vomit. There is a definite learning curve to all of this.
  16. I just reached goal! Yay!!!! But now I don't know how to stop loosing. I'm still dropping about 6-8 lbs per month. I am where I'd like to be in pant size. I'd be okay with going down one more size since my 6's are getting pretty baggy and I'm just a few lbs away from 4's....but I can't imagine anything below that. I'm nearly 5'7. A size 4-6 is tiny! ( I would NEVER have thought to describe myself as tiny. Weird) I am currently only getting around 700-900 calories in per day with the average being around 800. I can't see how I would add more food in to my daily diet. I am still leaning heavily on supplements because I get full on such a small amount of food I would never hit any goals without my drinks and bars. So now I need to be consuming, what? 1200 calories per day? That seems almost impossible right now. I have a doc appointment scheduled for next month and I will talk to them in depth about this. I'd like to hear from others who've reached goal. What did you do to stop the loss? Is there a risk of being unable to stop loosing? Thanks!
  17. Butterflyhigh

    What Every Weight Loss Surgery Candidate Should Know

    I am 4.5 months post-op and am just a few pounds away from reaching my goal of 23 BMI. What were you told prior to surgery about life after surgery that was not entirely true or was not the entire story? Nothing really. Life after surgery (so far) has been just what my Team said it would be. What do you wish you had fully understood prior to surgery that you did not and what do you believe would have put you in the best possible position to succeed after surgery? Even though I was prepared for the challenges of handling stress and emotional events without the ability to use my #1 coping method (eating), it was still incredibly hard in the beginning. I didn't realize how critical it would be to have healthy coping options. What information, if any, was missing in the lead-up to your surgery that gave you unreasonable expectations or that led to disappointment in the months or years since surgery? I would say that my surgeon was very honest about the risks vs benefits, realistic in his description of long term post-wls living, and did not try to oversell me on anything. The arena in which I have encountered the most 'cheerleading' has been the online bariatric forums. Something I've noticed in real life and it is well represented here is that most people are okay with just knowing the basics. They don't go into a bunch of in-depth questioning or research and they don't display much self awareness. The responsibility to learn and become educated about anything truly falls upon the individual. If a person is considering WLS and they don't question the process, the diet, the expectations, the long-term lifestyle changes, their own psychology, the aftercare plan, etc. it is because the desire to fully understand (and consequently change themselves) is not in their nature. It's just not. That's not a bad thing...as my Mama says "It takes all kinds to make the world go 'round", but it is just the way it is. We're all so different. The information is available to those who wish to learn it.
  18. Butterflyhigh

    What Every Weight Loss Surgery Candidate Should Know

    This is a great reply post. Very very true. I was lurking around here for at least one year before surgery and I've taken stock of the same things you've observed about the difference in people.
  19. What is too skinny? I'm 5-8 pounds away from goal weight. I'm 5'6" and 153 pounds. I'm currently in size 6 jeans and may end up in 4's. I'm thinner that I've ever been in my whole adult life. It's more than I dreamed for! However, some family are now becoming "concerned". I've lost too much weight. My face is getting too skinny. I'm starting to look sick. Will I please put larger portions on my plate.... I know that I have a disordered view of myself. Most of us probably do. It's been hard to see my own transformation. It's was only this past month that I stated seeing a thin person in the mirror. Why are people worried?? Is it because they aren't used to seeing me this thin...am I not seeing myself accurately....or is it that we as a culture confuse healthy skinny with scary skinny because we are used to seeing overweight as 'normal'? I don't know. What is too skinny?? Is it having a bony sharp frame? Is it wrinkling around the face because of loose skin? Is it what the BMI calculator says is underweight? Is it how the person feels physically; lack of energy and/or endurance? Is it when you can't sit on a hard chair without your butt feeling painful? Is it when people around you are becoming concerned? How do you define "too skinny"?
  20. Butterflyhigh

    When you can't even be honest with yourself

    Initially I was going to keep this to myself except for my bff, but in the end I decided to tell people. Now I wish I hadn't. Suffering through a family get-together because they are literally keeping count of how many bites I eat....watching them silently judge me and criticize my choice to do this...feeling like I have to constantly explain and defend my decision to have the surgery....knowing I am the topic of gossipy 'concern' amongst the family. In part I told them because I felt belittled and guilted by the idea that the OP expressed....that I HAD to be honest with everyone about myself. That I would be not be living a authentic life if I kept this secret. What BS. Everyone is entitled to handle this in the way that works best for them in their lives. We all have very different life circumstances. Because one way is right for you doesn't mean it is right for everyone. My family sucks. They are jealous, backstabbing, toxic people and I had NO OBLIGATION to tell them anything about my life. I was honest with them because I felt like it was the ethical thing to do....and now I regret it. I realize the 'right' thing to do was to be loyal to MYSELF. To make the best and most healthy decision for ME. Do I own the world the truth? Am I obligated to be someone's "example" of WLS?? NO.
  21. That was a wonderful, inspiring post!! Thank you for sharing. I am always so amazed at the changes that can take place over the course of a year. Well Done!
  22. Butterflyhigh

    How did you settle on a goal?

    My doc's goal was set at 24 bmi. My goal was set at size 8 jeans. I am currently a 25 bmi and size 6 jeans!! Another 9 pounds and I will hit my surgeon's goal. I hope to not loose another pant size, just a bit of jiggly left around the midsection. WLS has been like a dream for me. I never would have imagined being this size. Good Luck to you!!
  23. Butterflyhigh

    I thought things would be different

    I healed quickly with no complications and very little discomfort. After the initial major swelling went down I could gulp Water...not 8oz at a time or anything, but four decent sized gulps were okay. Eating was very slow and gentle. Only a little food fits in there, but it all goes in without any problems. Some folks just heal quickly. I think it depends on age, level of health, and expectations. Knock on wood! Because there are so many who've had difficult experiences with this wls. My prayers go out to them.
  24. I am 5'6" and my goal dress size was size 8. Now my 8's are getting baggy and I can see that 6's and very possibly 4's are in my future! Whoo Hoo!! I never would have imagined. So please, share your height and goal dress or pant size!
  25. I am almost four months post-op. I get in anywhere from 70-100g Protein everyday, but I am still heavily dependent upon supplemental drinks and bars to hit those numbers. I love my protein hot chocolate drink and will have 2 of those plus 1 muscle milk and 1 bar daily. The rest of my daily protein comes from beef Jerky, edamame, chicken, and beef. But, I would guess that 70% comes from supplements. I am loosing weight like crazy (after a four week stall) and I feel great! My nut said that for a low starting bmi'er, I'm the fastest looser she's seen!! I am just really curious how other people hit their daily protein goals and how dependent they are on the supplements???

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