Well I have broken the seal and am now down to 297. Never to see 300 again!! Thank you everyone who motivated me and commented. It helps a lot to keep me on track. I have continued walking and am working on 3 miles 5 days a week this week. I almost had it yesterday but I got down poured on and had to get a ride home. Boo!!! I am going to attempt it again today.
I am having some doubts today about having surgery. I found myself thinking I can do this w/out surgery I am doing it now. But then I remember that I will do this for a few months drop weight and then BAM fall off . This is why I need this surgery!!! I need the sleeve to get over that hump and not fall. I am guessing that a lot of people have doubts before surgery. I am 27 days away from surgery and still can't believe how fast the time is going by.
Yep need to start documenting this before I forget everything. Not to say I won't have the visual reminders to help me remember where I started (pictures, clothes, bum imprint on the couch) but it is the other things that fade with time that do not have a physical reminder. The worry about the what ifs and can I , the concern about what will happen and what won't happen.
Right now my biggest concern is not the surgery. Considering, in 6 weeks they are removing a significant portion of my stomach you would think that is the worry. But nope I have blown right through that like an out of control 3 year old in the toy department at Christmas. I have even moved beyond the thought of recovery pain and the "possible" side effects it will bring. Nope I am already into....what if it doesn't work - which of course turns into it doesn't look like its working in after surgery thought (always wanted to be ahead of the class even in grade school...skipped right past glue eating to advanced macaroni art).
Yep that is where I am at. I see pictures, read forums and absorb before and after pictures like a teenage boy absorbs girlie mags....but still I have that voice (to be named later) in my head saying what if it doesn't work. What if you go through all of this just to lose it and then gain? That doesn't mean I don't want to do it. I'm funny that way I still want to try it however unlike the tattoo I "tried" this can not be covered with clothes. Once people know they will start to judge and comment (you haven't lost much, was it REALLY worth it, or my favorite you looked better before).
Nope this change will be out there for all to see, judge and comment about...which brings me to my issue...what if it doesn't work.....my head says it will but my inner skinny person who is really shy questions me.
Maybe I should be worrying about excess skin and whether because of it my "hidden" tattoo will be even harder to find in its wrinkles .....
