docbree

Got my approval today!!!! Now it feels real to me!!!

@@bridget1015 Congrats, I am envious. My records got submitted to insurance yesterday so I am trying to be patient and play the waiting game. It's not easy when you have been working so long to get to this point and to know that it may have all been for nothing, you are at the mercy of the insurance company. Oh well, keeping good vibes going.
OMG right after I posted this the Dr. office called and I was approved!! December 2nd is my day!! I have an appt. for my endoscopy at the end of this month and one class and some labs and my pre-op physical in November and then my 2 week liquid diet starts Nov 18th and I am on my way to the losers bench! So excited!! I hope everyone else gets approved this fast, I am blown away!

My pre op diet consist of 2 shakes and a Protein and non starchy vegetable.
It's worked for me, surgery is Monday.

@@Babbs, it took me 53 but at least I got there.

I am of the mindset that you teach people how to treat you. If you make it clear that you are not going to put up with people's disrespectful bullsh*t, then MOST of the time they will either respond respectfully or keep quiet. I have found this telling my friends, family and Co workers. It's too bad it only took me 47 years to get to that point

While I personally agree with the OP, I respect everyone's right to privacy. Not everyone wants to discuss their personal business. I have lost just over 100lbs. Multiple times a day people notice and comment on it. I tell them thank you for noticing. If they ask how I did it. I tell them. I took nutrition classes and then had gastric bypass surgery. I haven't had anyone give any negative feedback. I have also inspired two people to look into getting it for themselves. Which I am proud of. If I hadn't told them I had it they would probably have never looked into it for themselves. So for me this is the right choice. I respect the fact that not everyone is comfortable with sharing their journey and that is their choice.

I didn't tell many people at first. I think mostly because I was afraid of failure. These were the people who had seen me lose and gain many times. Once it became obvious ( at about the 50lb mark) I did open up to a few people. Now I am open with everyone who asks or has not seen me in a long time. Some people are private I guess and don't want to make a big deal. It is the same to me as a person who gets a facelift or a breast augmentation. We can see you did something, why lie? But I just know in my own situation I did not want to broadcast something until I knew I was successful.

It is not about sharing it is about misleading.
It seems to me if through some conversation, a discussion arises around a person's weight loss. The only honest response is
(a) I'd rather not discuss it or
( I had WLS
any other response really can leave the impression that you lost weight soley through exercise/diet - that is horribly misleading and damaging to others.
While a person has every right to keep their medical history private, I really don't think the person should directly or indirectly lie.

My nut is part of the Bariatric team. She is like no other nut. She believes in moderation and balance in all things except things that can hurt your surgery. You would be thrilled to have her. She is amazing and has been there for me whenever I have needed her. She taught me to eat again after 5.5 months of not eating. She believes we live in the real world and need to eat in the real world. I am not brain washed, I have learned a lot from this lady!

Agree with built2livenotexist, I would start your pre op diet. I did several practice runs before surgery. See if you can get your surgeon to agree that if you lose the 8lbs by say Mid November that they'll submit you before the end of November. If you have access to a pool you could swim. Maybe Pilates moves that dont involve standing?
Since you can't exercise strenuously, you'll have to severely modify your diet to create a deficit between what you eat and what you burn. Maybe do shakes during the day and something good and healthy for dinner. I actually like to keep dinner fairly light so I ate during the day and had a shake for dinner. You can pump the shakes up with fruit and veggies and a good Protein powder and maybe something filling like flax.
Also make sure you get in lots of Fiber so that you errrm evacuate on a regular schedule! Good luck to you! I really hate the dangling of the carrot that your doc is doing. Reasons why I self paid and went to Mexico.

You could try the pre-op liquid diet; I wound up losing 9 pounds with that and moderate cardio.

Following this thread and very interested to hear responses from veterans. I think it's wonderful that you gave that very important information to the pre-op attendee. There are a couple of people who are more than ten years out from surgery who attend my support group and their input is really appreciated by all of us. They are inspiring role models.

Jim, you're right, and I specifically stated in another post that I'm not talking about shouting from rooftops or posting on social media. I have done neither. This was about the answer you give when specifically asked about how you lost so much weight. VSGAnn give a good answer of how truthful disclosure may affect her career. Others gave examples of how the news ruined relationships with friends and family. I am totally disgusted when I hear these stories. As for friends, good riddance, I wouldn't want those types of people in my life anyways. What's the point of having "fake" friends? Of course it gets more complicated with family when you are forced to deal with them even after discovering what jerks they are.
The dilemma is weighing the potential negative outcome of full disclosure against the perpetuation of WLS and obesity stigma and myths. Because with the stigma comes the embarrassment and shame a lot of obese people feel, and shouldn't have to. Those that choose not to disclose will forever be the example of how much weight you can lose by simply exercising and eating less.

Algae, bravo!

I can respect that many people don't want to be the public voice for WLS, even as recipients of this surgery. But I also see the value in those who are an "open book." It seems that there are many layers of middle ground between those who decide to keep this surgery private and those who want to make the public aware of WLS and use their own life as an example.
As a child I was sexually abused for many years. I didn't choose that for my self or my life, but it happened. As I've worked through the trauma I experienced as a child, there are many times when I've sworn I would never, ever let anyone know what happened to me. Shame, embarrassment, denial, anger... I've felt them all.
Even though each person who reads this would probably respond that those experiences aren't my fault and that their hearts go out to me, I still feel dirty and shameful. No one shouts these things from the rooftop joyfully, thankfully.
But it takes someone who has been through this hell to change things in society. While I may not want to be the poster child for sexual abuse, I'm also thankful that there are people who champion this cause.
I just wanted to use this as an illustration. There will be many reasons for WLS and not everyone will travel the same path to get there. Whether I prefer to stay private about my surgery or if I'm loud and proud, I think the following sentiments apply to everyone. I'm thankful for the people who have gone before us and paved a way for us to have these surgeries. I'm also thankful for the people who feel comfortable and open to share their journey on here to help others. And I'm thankful for those of you who are actively working to lessen the stigma of WLS.

Praying for a normal biopsy!

Great post! ( Here are my responses. Banded June 2013- 111lbs lost)
What were you told prior to surgery about life after surgery that was not entirely true or was not the entire story? The band does not stop head hunger or make you magically stop craving food. The first 90days are tough in maintaining enough Protein and Fluid. Now it is second nature but those first few months are very challenging. I thought I would be stuffed after eating 2-3 baby bites of everything

What do you wish you had fully understood prior to surgery that you did not and what do you believe would have put you in the best possible position to succeed after surgery?
I wish I knew why I was fat in the first place. Understanding the emotional issues might make it easier for some to remain on the right track. I also had lists of suggested foods but would have liked a maybe some menu examples from my surgical team to make it a little easier at first. Dealing with the social aspect of eating was hard on me
What information, if any, was missing in the lead-up to your surgery that gave you unreasonable expectations or that led to disappointment in the months or years since surgery? I was given detailed medical information but would have loved to hear about others challenges in the event I was at a plateau or feeling down. All the focus is on the procedure and not how you will feel as the lbs come off.
Overall
I wish I was better prepared for all of the nosy people who either told me I was taking the easy way out that I should lose weight the "right ' way OR tell me I am not eating enough and am getting malnourished. When you lose weight you see that all of your friends are not always supportive and in fact they may be jealous. That still hurts

Ditto to most of what VSGAnn said....I had surgery in Mexico so had no formal "education" or preparation before surgery. I soaked up all of my information on this and other forums and by talking to others I knew had WLS. Even though they had a band and bypass, their mental and emotional struggles are no different than mine with VSG.
After all of my research, there was really nothing that took me by surprise. Other than perhaps how easy my recovery and weight loss ended up being. I was glad to have been "over prepared" with the good, bad and the ugly.
And the variations of postop patient behavior and outcomes that VSGAnn described seems right on.

When I went to my first Bariatric Surgery Support Group Meeting, I was surprised by how negative it was. Everyone there had horror stories to tell. I was beginning to doubt why should I have the surgery. But then I thought it through. I reasoned that many of the people there had run into problems after surgery and this was their means of resolving them. The people who when through the process smoothly did not attend these types of meetings.
What do you wish you had fully understood prior to surgery that you did not and what do you believe would have put you in the best possible position to succeed after surgery?
I am 18 months post-op from RNY. I have heard that the stomach heals after about a year and a half and absorbs more of the calories in food - something like going from 70% absorption to 100%. There is nothing in the literature that discusses this. If this is true, it may be the reason why many people struggle and fail years after surgery. I am happy with my current meal plan and my weight is stable but if I have to cut my calorie intake by 30 percent, it might be difficult.

I agree that there is a honeymoon phase here. Its like prepping for the wedding. We plan plan plan and shut out anyone who tells us the groom or bride isn't perfect and that things won't be perfect after the wedding. Anybody whose been married as long as I have, 35 years, knows that it takes a lot of work to be married. I admit I was given only the bright picture from my WLS team. My only support group was from a coworker who had had the surgery 8 or 9 months earlier and was in the honeymoon phase herself. I didn't find this site until after surgery. I'm sort of glad I didn't. I see a whole lot of positive here, but I also see a whole lot of whining. I might have backed out. What a pity that would have been.



What I was not told: The weight gain was never about food really, maintenance would not be about food and Long term reality wouldn't be about food. Yes, food definitely plays an important role in all of this, but it's not the biggest issue. We all eat excessively, too fast or whatever, for other reasons.Until we deal with that, we still have a problem. Maybe not even an eating problem. I have not sought counseling, but I spend aot of time analyzing why I eat and I know for sure it's not hunger. I did the Protein shake diet for 2 days this week and experienced real hunger for the first time in a year and a half. I found that this hunger was very easy to satisfy with another Protein Shake. The feeling that I've always called hunger cannot be satisfied with food, as hard as I try.



My surgeon says in his blog if you find yourself hungry, ask yourself if a carrot will satisfy that hunger. If not, it's not really hunger. I tried this the other day and it actually does work. Ok, so I'm rambling now, so I'll just finish by saying, The wedding won't change the groom/bride. The WLS isn't going to change your relationship with food. You have to do that yourself. The WLS is a tool and a very helpful one. If somebody handed you a wrench and told you to take out a bolt, you'd still have to do the work. Its certainly easier with a wrench. So figure it out. If you can afford counseling, great. If not, your on your own. You can still do it. But do some research and see if you can figure out why you use food to deal with every day issues. I never could figure out drug addicts and why they used drugs as a crutch. But, I've used food the same way. I still do find myself doing this, but at least I know I'm doing it and that makes it easier to not do it. I said easier....not easy.

What were you told prior to surgery about life after surgery that was not entirely true or was not the entire story?
Although I feel that my Dr's seminar was very informative as well as this message board, there are many aspects of my new life I was not prepared for. I was not prepared for how easily eating something that doesn't agree with me can take me out with such intense pain for hours. How feeling full is now in my chest not in my belly. How incredibly important it is to stay hydrated.

What do you wish you had fully understood prior to surgery that you did not and what do you believe would have put you in the best possible position to succeed after surgery?
As I stated before, the Doctor was very informative and I am extremely happy that I choose to have the surgery. And it has been stated here many times but I still to this day have a hard time wrapping my head round it. NEITHER THIS SURGERY NOR THE WEIGHT LOSS WILL MAKE YOU LIFE BETTER!!!!! OMG I cannot stress it enough and am still struggling with it. Now I am just a much thinner me but struggling with poor eating habits and all my other vices that I have had for decades. It didn't improve my marriage, my parenting skills or my relationship with others. It is a weight loss tool and that is all it is. You still have to do the hard work.

What information, if any, was missing in the lead-up to your surgery that gave you unreasonable expectations or that led to disappointment in the months or years since surgery?
None that I can think of.

I'll be subscribing to this thread. Thank you for bringing this up. I am pre surgery but I have an interesting prospective. I have been feeling a bit like an imposter my entire process for getting qualified for surgery. This, WLS, is supposed to be the like the last house on the block. We were supposed to have tried and failed miserably at the weight loss thing and never had any long term success at losing weight, but this has not been my exact story.
In 2005, I lost 140# without surgery. I discovered that I have a sensitivity to gluten and sugar and I stopped eating junk food. I didn't exercise but the weight literally fell off my body. I was lighter than I had been my entire adult life. I went from 320# to180# in about 8 months probably averaging about the same clip as a bypass patient I'm imagining. I had some feelings of euphoria, but mostly I felt like a live electrical wire. My comfy fat, my safe place to hide from the world was suddenly gone and I felt as if I was practically electrocuted if I would even brush by furniture too hard. I had trouble sleeping with the new sensations of my knees, ankles and toes rubbing together aching for their familiar cushion and I felt horribly uncomfortable if anything including clothes touched my newly discovered clavicles. I cried at random and inconvenient intervals. I stayed at this low weight for a VERY short time and hovered comfortably at 200 for many many years.
I was never prepared for and have never heard ppl taking about how to just be and reside in a body, newly formed and considerably smaller. How do we really listen and hear and feel in a body with new sensations and dimensions? How do we become like the normies I call them, those people who never ever gain weight while we constantly were ballooning up and dieting down the scale?
What were/are we to do with our one life outside of food? I know I have the tendency to want the newer, sexier, more interesting route to any destination, like success with even WLS can't just be about plain old (following the prescribed) diet and exercise, can it? I'm still wondering if the surgery is just the newest thing for me. I switched my surgical consideration from sleeve to bypass for this very reason. Because if I'm going to do it, I need to go old school. With me it had to be vegan, raw, paleo and Crossfit. Zero to sixty. Never just walking, always training for the half.
What happens when the proverbial dust settles and it's not about the food anymore and the weight is lost? When the life I thought weight loss or this surgery would fix is still going forward unchanged? Sitting in this empty space with myself without support and resources or a clue is what made maintenance so elusive and probably so for most people who've lost massive amounts of weight with or without surgery and gained it back. Will having had a glimpse of being thin for a while make me a better bariatric patient, more compliant? Perhaps, or maybe not but at this stage in the game I can't take anything for granted but these are the questions that are clearer in hindsight and that I need to formulate a plan for now on this side of surgery.

What are your doctors doing about the anemia? Maybe you need an Iron infusion if you can't get enough/absorb enough orally. I hope they get to the bottom of this and that you start feeling better!

I had another appointment today with the bariatric doc and he disagreed with that decision of no surgery with Barretts Esophagus. We discussed it at length and he advised me that he feels I can still have it after looking over a few of my personal stats. The main one being that before being banned I had not had one single episode of acid reflux/heart burn. It's not 100% definate that he will do the sleeve, but he feels it is very likely and my date stays set at December 9, 2014. He'll let me know once I get my result from the biopsy of my esophagus. Needless to say, I am overjoyed!!

thank you so much for your prayers. They are very much appreciated.