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nygurl

Pre Op
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Blog Entries posted by nygurl

  1. nygurl

    29# finally SEE IT!

    By nygurl,

    Well, I got on the scale this morning, down 29# from 2/28 when I was sleeved. Feeling MUCH better about myself, I know I've posted a lot lately- just can't SEE it in myself yet. I bought a new shirt- in a large, expecting to put it away for the summer when I drop another 15# or so...got it home and felt brave enough to try it on and see how far I was from really being able to wear it....IT FITS!!!!!! I took a pic to send to my hubby, and when I looked at the screen I SAW IT!! I can FINALLY see the change in myself I think people are right- we see ourselves everyday, we most likely have a negative view of ourselves in our head that seems hard to shake....it takes a good 30# to see a change. I still have trouble seeing it when I look in the mirror, but I finally saw the new me coming out in that picture today...so I had to share it.
    I'm loving my new lease on life, I am so greatful that I was provided with this chance to get my life back on track before it was too late. I'm feeling very very blessed today (and kinda hot too!! ) I love this new me, and I'm excited to see what the rest of this journey has in store for me.
  2. nygurl

    39# POST OP

    By nygurl,

    Weight loss has slowed a bit- went from like a pound a day for a while there- to about 1-2 pounds a week, I find myself getting frustrated with that...but know that it's several times better than I've ever done on my own. I had to share the face shot comparison...the one on the left is from March 30 (so about 1 mo post-op), the one on the right is from today
  3. nygurl

    ALMOST there

    By nygurl,

    ALMOST there!! Hit the scale today at 175, that means a total loss of 80 pounds since my pre-op weight (65 post op). I'm comfortably in a size 8 (from a size 18/20)...and I'm loving my new life.
    I was blessed with a recent change to meet my all-time FAVORITE band (Rascal Flatts) just this past month. I was so happy to be able to go and enjoy myself and take pictures and not worry about how I looked, or what people were thinking. It's amazing how much this life-change has really put my entire life in a new perspective. I didn't realize how lacking my confidence was...actually I always prided myself on being a confident woman, but I didn't see how much I was holding back until I lost the weight.
    I had the joy of attending my daughter's Back-To-School Night last week, her 2nd grade teacher (from 2 years ago) didn't even recognize me.
    For those of you that are struggling or are in the early stages of this change...keep the faith- you CAN do this, and I promise you it will be worth it's weight in gold when you are living your new life. For those of you debating on doing it...I cannot promise you an easy path, I can't say for certian you won't have complications or problems- but I can tell you- without any doubt, this is the best thing I've ever done for myself, for my children, for my family, and for my own happiness.
     
    Ok, just wanted to drop a quick update on everyone- OFF TO WALK ON LUNCH!!!
    XOXXOXOXO
  4. nygurl

    ALMOST there

    By nygurl,

    ALMOST there!! Hit the scale today at 175, that means a total loss of 80 pounds since my pre-op weight (65 post op). I'm comfortably in a size 8 (from a size 18/20)...and I'm loving my new life.
    I was blessed with a recent change to meet my all-time FAVORITE band (Rascal Flatts) just this past month. I was so happy to be able to go and enjoy myself and take pictures and not worry about how I looked, or what people were thinking. It's amazing how much this life-change has really put my entire life in a new perspective. I didn't realize how lacking my confidence was...actually I always prided myself on being a confident woman, but I didn't see how much I was holding back until I lost the weight.
    I had the joy of attending my daughter's Back-To-School Night last week, her 2nd grade teacher (from 2 years ago) didn't even recognize me.
    For those of you that are struggling or are in the early stages of this change...keep the faith- you CAN do this, and I promise you it will be worth it's weight in gold when you are living your new life. For those of you debating on doing it...I cannot promise you an easy path, I can't say for certian you won't have complications or problems- but I can tell you- without any doubt, this is the best thing I've ever done for myself, for my children, for my family, and for my own happiness.
     
    Ok, just wanted to drop a quick update on everyone- OFF TO WALK ON LUNCH!!!
    XOXXOXOXO
  5. nygurl

    ALMOST there

    By nygurl,

    OK- when I say "there" I don't mean my final goal- but I do mean ONEDERLAND! Weighed in today at 204....I have been trying so hard to stay on track and push this extra weight off...I'm about 1/2 way to my actual goal- and saying as it's only been 9 1/2 weeks, I'm pretty proud to report that
     
    I'm excited to go through my summer stuff- and toss/donate all the old clothes from fall/winter that are now way too big, and dig out the summer clothes that I've been storing for years (that used to be too small), telling myself that "eventually these WILL fit again". I'm down 3 sizes since my surgery- which is a great feeling...and even if it was an XL, I bought a new summer dress for myself in the juniors section the other day (little victories make this so much more fun!)
    I'm a little worried that those that knew me best were right, that I've become so hyper-critical of myself that I'm still not pleased with what I see. I feel better- don't get me wrong, but I'm already mentally planning to get pretty much a full-body makeover when I'm at my goal. A plastic surgeon in the area does what he calls a "Mommy Makeover"...tummy, arms, thighs, boobs...SIGN ME UP.
    Anyone else feel that way? Anyone else a little worried that you'll NEVER look in the mirror and just be happy with what you see??
  6. nygurl
    So, I had been running an extremely low grade fever post op....between 99-100, however the doctor said that was okay since my body was healing. Yesterday was my first full day back to work, I work at home at a desk job but was still expecting some discomfort. But it just seemed like as the day wore on I felt worse and worse my pain was more and more intense.... just all in all a crummy day. Finally 530 rolled around and I basically crawl to the couch to spend the rest of my night. Got in about a quarter cup to a half cup of soup.... and started literally shivering and shaking because I was so cold. Took my temp and it was 101.3.... which is high enough that I am supposed to notify my doctor
    My doctor called me right back and discuss the potential for a leak although was sure to mention that my surgery went extremely well.... but the pain that hadn't seen to subside since surgery, and now with a growing fever he suggested I go to the emergency room to be checked out. I was terrified
    They ended up doing a barium and IV contrast CT scan, and discovered I have a 7 millimeter kidney stone.... that is not passing on its own :"(
    So they admitted me last night from the emergency room and I am awaiting surgery for my kidney stone today... the good news is my surgery was a success and there is no issues with a leak or anything along those lines. However I certainly feel the saying, "when it rains it pours" sure is fitting today
    this is not how I wanted to get 2 weeks off of work :/
  7. nygurl

    back to life...

    By nygurl,

    So- this might be a longshot- I'm 3 weeks post op today...wanting to get back to riding horses again- anyone know when it's clear to do this? I could call my dr- but wasn't sure if anyone had a similar experience and could give me some insight
     
    Thanks!
  9. nygurl

    Class Reunion :)

    By nygurl,

    So, my 10 year class reunion was last weekend...I was excited to go- but still very nervous. As I've said a hundred times before- I've been overweight most of my life- and while I was excited to show off the new me...many people from high school hadn't seen me at my heaviest point, which came a few years after my son was born- so I wasn't sure they'd notice any major change- like those that really know me did.
    Boy, was I wrong. EVERYONE had nice things to say about how great I looked, and it was nice to go and enjoy the evening and NOT feel like everyon had something rude to say- or was watching me. It was nice to just be one of the crowd, and not feel like I stood out. Hubby looked awesome as usual, and we made a cute couple that I was proud to show off
    It was great catching up with some long-lost friends and reconnecting with some folks I hadn't talked to in the last 10 years as well.
     
    I felt like getting to go and ending the night not being totally panicked about what everyone else was thinking was my biggest accomplishment thus far.
     
    Me and my best bud from high school before the reunion
     
    5 month photo change!!
  10. nygurl

    Couch to 5k!

    By nygurl,

    So, I started the couch to 5k program this week, using the online support and the app I downloaded to my Android phone for free- I like it. It just vibrates my phone when it's time to switch from fast walk/run. I started it Monday and did ok- it's a big change from being off pretty much all activity other than walking to an actual regimented work out...I did a walk yesterday, and then the couch to 5k day two is today.
    I'm pretty proud of myself, I was 240 post op, and today weighed in at 216 Can't complain about that. I'm not in new clothes just yet- but my old ones are falling off of me, which is finally a good feeling. I still don't see it in my body, I guess a bit in my face- and that's what people seem to tel me- plus my wedding ring is spinning like crazy on my finger- time to get one of those adjustable band attachments until my weightloss settles in and then I can go get it resized. Kinda exciting stuff if you ask me
     
    Hope all is well with everyone else!!
  11. nygurl

    Differences in Life

    By nygurl,

    Well, first a few REALLY exciting things...this morning the scale dropped again to 177, meaning a total loss of 78 pounds, 63 pounds post op. The other day I put on AND ZIPPED UP a pair of size 8 jeans...I've never been in a size 8...I honestly can't remember being one anyway.... so that is all great exciting stuff for this week
     
    The last two weeks it seems eating has become hard again, I realized as I sat with not really an upset stomach, but just feeling generally crappy after about 3 bites of dinner last night...I HATE EATING. I only do it to live now. It's weird to think of it that way. I used to really enjoy a really good meal, or a really yummy snack..and don't get me wrong- I'll still totally indulge in a brownie or something sweet and good like that- but generally speaking- I only eat to live. I never thought I'd see that day. It's a totally different world than the one I used to live in. I never really "crave" anything anymore- my husband hates that he asks me 'what do you want to eat?" and my genuine answer is "I don't care"....although I do care- b/c it can't be anything with too much bread, or anythig high in sugar, or carbs- lol- my stomach just doesn't tolerate those things anymore. To be honest though, I don't mind, I don't really miss it- I wasn't eating executive chef meals everynight- so if Taco Bell no longer sounds appetizing, I can handle that
     
    The saying is true- nothing tastes as good as skinny feels
  12. nygurl

    GOAL!

    By nygurl,

    So sorry it's been forever- life seems to creep up on you and next thing you know- you don't have 3 seconds to sit down and blog. lol
    So- I've hit and passed my dr's goal, and my own goal...I'm currently at 149, in a size 4/6 pants, and a Medium shirt. I've lost a total of 106#, 8-10 pant sizes and 4 shirt sizes
     
    I'm saving up to have breast augmentation...they're WRECKED and I'm trying to figure out if my insurance will cover a tummy tuck, or if I'll have to fund that myself as well. I have lost over 100# so I think they might cover it, but they didn't cover my surgery- so I'm doing leg work on that right now. I'm with Blue Care Network in Michigan...so I'll keep everyone posted on that.
    Life is amazing. I'm happier than I've ever been...I feel good, I look good- I have more energy- I'm motivated...this decision has changed my entire life, in every single aspect.
    I recently re-started a 30 day challenge, and have been working out everyday, I'm waiting for this TERRIBLE Michigan weather to break so that I can start walking...and hopefully running outside this Spring/Summer....I'd like to try doing a 5k this year- that's my goal...so here's to that!
     
    Here is a progress picture I wanted to share with you too.
    Thanks to each of you that offered support, encouragement, or just an ear when I was having a hard day (or a good day!!).
     
    I'm going to make a better effort to keep blogging here too- my journey is not over..no way! This year is just the start of the rest of my life
  13. nygurl

    Here goes nothin'

    By nygurl,

    Well, I've never been a "blogger" but I've always been a writer, so hopefully this will be something I can keep up with, and keep track of this entire journey.
    As of right now, I'm still pre-op. I decided in early January 2013 that I'd had enough. I've done the diets, I've done the exercise routines, boot camps, pills, programs, shakes...nothing works. It's the same 20 pounds I've been losing and gaining for years now. I'm tired of working my butt off, and not showing any results, or showing results- and the second I back the plan to a livable level- boom, the weight is back on.
    I've struggled with my weight my entire life- and I decided 2013 will be the year I change that.
     
    I met with my PCP already, she agrees, we've been working on my weight loss for almost 2 years now, and she sees my work, my diets, my programs, and the failures they've all been. I was referred to Bilal Kharbutli who works out of Henry Ford Wyandotte. I contacted them the same day- I was excited, and nervous- but ready to at least get more info. That's actually how I found this site...digging for more info. The permanent nature of this surgery has me a little freaked out, to be honest.
    I contacted Dr. Kharbutli and they said I needed to attend a seminar, coming up on 1/15- I signed up- asked my husband to come along so he knew what we were getting me into (lol), and found a sitter for my son.
    I was more than nervous when the day came, and it was just the seminar!! I was surprised how many people were there, shocked at the information that was given to us- the obesity rates in the US are OUTSTANDING...it brought me a lot of information, a lot of comfort too- I walked out of there ready to "do this". I'm a little scared, every once in a while I think..what if I get this surgery and hate my life - this is forever, this isn't something you can go- "oh well, that didn't work out- on to something else" this is a MAJOR lifestyle change, and it's forever. The other side of me says- you need this, you haven't been able to get it done any other way- and a major lifestyle change is in order.
    I called the next day to set up my direct one on one consult with the surgeon, they never called me back. I called again today and got a receptionist- told her I wanted to set up my initial consult, and she explained they needed to run my info through insurance first to find out if it's covered...i asked- how can you find out if I'm covered, when you don't know my bmi? She asked for an approximate weight and height...which bothered me a bit. I've always called myself 5'7, but what if I'm only 5'6? The reason I stress about this- is that I'm JUST barely qualified for this surgery- at this moment. I've been qualified in the past, but decided this was the LAST option, and kept up dieting/exercise/Adipex daily. Anyway- I'm technically qualified if I have one or more health conditions-- other than head splitting migrains and daily back aches...I do'nt have the typical high bp, diabetes, etc- actually my dr said- I do'nt understand your weight struggle...when you look at your info on paper- your blood values, diet and exercise program, stats- you should be a healthy weight person...but I'm not...no clue why...? (very annoying to hear this btw).
    So at this point, the surgeon's office is contacting my doc to get records of my past diet and exercise programs, and then they're supposed to call me back for my first 1 on 1 consult.
    They've said I need to pay my deductable, and that my insurance then covers 50%, with a coinsurance limit of $1500...I'm not sure what that means exactly...either I'll end up paying less than $2,000 out of pocket, or could be paying like $5,000-$6,000 out of pocket- I need to figure that out
     
    I guess that's it for today, at this point, I'm eating whatever I want..and feeling terrible about myself. I know that sounds crazy, but the dr said honestly with me being as close to just no questions asked "covered" by my insurance, a few extra pounds won't hurt my case. BLAH...as much as I enjoy digging into those yummy foods and stuff when the mood strikes, I find myself feeling crappier and crappier everyday- I hate seeing my body slipping back to the worst it has ever been- it's a not so great feeling, and I sure hope I don't need to keep this up for the next 6 months or whatever- I hear wait periods on all this process can be killer.
     
    Here's to hoping I get a quick response from the doc today-
  14. nygurl
    I've read from a few other posters that after surgery for some reason, they have some emotional unbalance...depression, etc.
    OMG- I've been the crabbiest, crybaby ever the last solid 24 hours. Yesterday I was EXTREMELY tired...and slept a good part of the day (on an upnote- went in for my first pre-op check...surgery was 2/28, pre-op visit yesterday had me down 10# from Wednesday!!)
    Today, everything makes me angry, being angry makes me feel overwhelmed, being overwhelmed- makes me cry...so that's fun.
    Today is also my first full day back to work- have gotten little to nothing done at this point, and frankly- I stopped caring about 4 hours ago. I'm just really cranky and want to crawl into bed and be left the hell alone.
     
    IS THAT NORMAL?! lol :wacko:
  15. nygurl
    Ok so, two days post op. I was discharged yesterday and hone by like 1:30-2:00. Lots of sleep since then. Still getting up and walking on the treadmill for 15-20 minutes at a time. Funky starting to move some gas so that's a relief! I'm having a he'll of a time getting anything in. Liquids and protein are like impossible. I'm just not hungry. Everything I make tastes terrible, I really need to get some recipes or ideas that are low volume but high protein ...not so much luck on that right now. I either end up with what feels like could be 3 days of protein shakes. Or like an ass flovered paste lol.
    Hopefully this gets easier!
  16. nygurl
    Just got the call from my bank!! I'm approved!! SURGERY IS OFFICALLY A GO! I never thought this would happen so fast! It's something I just started really investigating in January, and it looks like I'll be signed tomorrow, and can schedule surgery as early as the end of this month...
    Funny, all those nervous feelings are gone- I'm totally confident in the choice I'm making, and frankly, I'm ready to have my LIFE BACK.
    I'll keep you posted!!
  17. nygurl

    hospital stay

    By nygurl,

    Ok, so I'm officially a 'sleever'! My preop nurses were AWESOME! My anesthesiologist....AMAZING!
    My surgery took about 30 minutes and I've had an amazing recovery. Up walking for 15 minutes at a time every hour. Have only had to have a few doses of pain meds. Things are going very well.
    It's amazing to experience this like instant change in my outlook, attitude, and really ....my life.
    Walking along today slow and steady I couldn't help but smile and congratulate myself for being strong enough to make this choice and I can't wait to share my journey with you all as I go
    tucking myself in now to get some much needed rest.
    Nighty Night sleevers!
  18. nygurl
    LOL
     
    Sorry for the lame blog title- but I've been singing the song all day, not sure if it was a subliminal thing, or if I heard it on hold-music while I was working
     
    Sounds like my insurance is going to give me the full run-around and after feeling like the wind had been taken out of my sails yesterday, I set out today looking for the next option.
     
    I'm excited to say, while I did look into some options in Mexcio- I couldn't shake that ultra-nervous feeling I had about it- so I opted to trust my gut and look here in the US. I figured even if it's not within state, it'll still be closer than Mexico. Luckily- my search led me to two places here in MI. One was the Barix Clinic in Ypsilanti, however, they wanted $25,500 for the surgery- and that is just wayyy to out of the budget for me to self-fund. I did find Pleatman Surgical Center in Bloomfield Hills, called and spoke to the nurse- I'm qualified for their program, and even set up my initial consult...this is really happening!! I'm so excited to move forward on this journey. I'm trying to get the time arranged off work but as of right now, the morning of 2/6 will be my big date to meet my surgeon and schedule my surgery-- fingers crossed!
     
    I'd like some feed back on this dr/location if anyone has any- I'm all ears..(and smiles today)
  19. nygurl
    After some more online research, and a few phone calls- and the prospect of self-pay...I found Dr. Pleatman in Bloomfield, MI.
    His office staff has been great, super helpful, and very friendly thus far.
    I had my first meeting with him today, I was a little worried- not exactly sure what a one on one would entail...and had read a few reviews saying he was a bit cold, not very friendly.
    Hubby came along for info and (as always...) support. They got me right in on time, weighed me without putting my #s up on a flashing billboard on the side of the highway, which I've come to fear at every visit at this point..lol.
    Dr. Pleatman was a little dry, but I'd hardly call him rude. He answered all of my questions in detail, went over numbers, charts, even photographs of patients that were in my age/bmi range and their results. We disucssed band, sleeve, and bypass- and he was very confident and set on his recommendation to do the sleeve, which made me feel much more comfortable.
    SO- I guess....onward from here- I'm organizing the last bit of funding, and dr said- he's off next week- but if all is ready when he's back surgery could be as early as the week of February 20th!
    I guess we'll have to wait and see, I do need to attend one last seminar with his staff as pre-op prep, but they offer them about twice a week when they have surgery scheduled, so that doesn't appear to be much of an issue either...VERY EXCITED!
  20. nygurl
    Ok, so here we are- the week of surgery- three days from now- I'll be in recovery. I had a moment of panic this morning. My son crawled into my bed and I had this sudden flash of "what if you die!?!?" come through my mind. I literally panicked...my heart rate went up- my mouth got dry- my palms got sweaty. I posted on a thread that I'm sort of active in on the site- and thanfully almost immediately two women talked me down realizing that it could happen to anyone, anywhere- obviously surgery has its risks- but I needed to but my rational thinking brain in action...make sure I spoke with hubby about the plans should anything go wrong, but keep in mind- I'm doing this to have a healthier LIFE going forward. SO- protein shake, water, positive outlook...moving foward with today- and ready to start my new life later this week
    I'll keep you all posted!! :wub:
  21. nygurl
    First day back to work....again...since surgery. I worked Tuesday last week, but ended up in the ER Tuesday night b/c of a major kidney stone/infection- fun times. I'm working a full day today- but only 1/2 tomorrow b/c I need to go back to the hospital to have them take this stent out so I should be good to go after that.
    I weighed myself this morning, was kinda bummed to see only a few pounds off, since my first week was super successful. I went from 240 pre-op to 238 the day prior to surgery (2/27), first weigh in was on 3/4 and I was already down to 228. Today 226.
    I'm having a REALLY hard time getting my fluids and any kind of food/protein in- it's not that I can't keep it down or that it hurts or anything like that- I simply have NO desire to eat or drink... :/ I guess that's better than what I was dealing with before...right?
  22. nygurl

    New Lifestyle

    By nygurl,

    Well, I hit ONEDERLAND on June 6th, and have dropped another 3 pounds since then. It feels great to know that those #s are behind me, and will be gone for the rest of my life now. I'm 6 pounds away from hitting 50# total loss post-op.
    It's a great feeling being more active, wanting to work out, knowing that each healthy choice I make is finally actually making a difference in my end weight...whereas before it felt like all work and no pay off. I'm so glad I made this decision for myself, there has not been one day of regret so far.
    My sisters and my dad are all talking about having the surgery now too, which makes me feel good, like I made the right choice- and they can see the positive changes it's made in my life- and they want it too.
    My size 14 jeans are literally falling off of me, but I HATE to buy new jeans, knowing soon enough- they're going to be too big too...random, isn't it?!
     
    Just wanted to check in, I told myself that I'd blog as much as I could on this journey to keep folks informed, and maybe someone out there deciding on the surgery will be able to see this thing through from my perspective, and it'll help them make their own decisions.
  23. nygurl

    on the road..

    By nygurl,

    As long of a journey I was expecting this to be....I'm on the way to the hospital right now for surgery.
    I'm excited, nervous, and scared all at the same time....and I'd kill for some breakfast lol. Yesterday was hard, only clear liquids. My Dr didn't provide me with any other preop diet...just to try and lose something and keep walking. I'm not sure how those folks on clear liquids for weeks on end do it!
    Surgery is scheduled for 9:30, I need to be there at 7:30...of course Michigan is dumping a nasty winter mix on us...so now I get to add worrying about being late to everything else...oh well, it's something else to focus on, right?!
    See ya on the flip side
  24. nygurl
    The surgery yesterday evening went well, they were able to get the kidney stone out, so that's good. I'm still uncomfortable, and running a fever on and off due to the infection it caused. My blood pressure is kind of all over the place, one reading high- the next might be low- the next normal...so between that and the fever, they're keeping me one more night to make sure they get all the antibiotcs on board that they wanted to.
    (P.S.- these liquid meds TASTE TERRIBLE! lol)
    As much of a bummer as it is to have kindey stones, I really took a lot of comfort in knowing, I have no remaining issues from surgery. The pain I thought I was having b/c of it turned out to be kidney stone, so I'm completely healed and doing well with my sleeve itself.
    I've also found now that the stone is out- and the pain is down, I'm much better at getting my fluids in- still working on the protein angle, but it's hard to fill that order at the hospital- I've been using muscle milk for now- just to get something in.
     
    Thanks all for the support and well wishes the other day! Best of luck to the rest of you sleevers!
  25. nygurl

    ONEDERLAND!

    By nygurl,

    So excited to share that I got on the scale this morning and I've hit ONEDERLAND! I was really getting frustrated, seems I've been fighting this same 5-10 pounds for what feels like forever. I know a lot of folks on here have been so supportive, and have tried to help keep me in the reality of "two pounds a week" is a great loss, and more than I'd have lost before-- but it's easy to get wrapped up in getting on the scale and not seeing what we deem a "significant" enough change. I guess that's part of my own downfall that I still need to work on. My sisters especially have mentioned it- seems I'm never happy with the way I look, that even after losing 56# (which is my total loss now ... 41 since surgyery) that I just find the next thing wrong. I've already talked a bit about this in my previous posts, so I'm not going to go on and on about it- but it kind of seems to stick in the back of my mind lately.
    I've also found myself having a hard time just saying, "Thank you, I've worked hard" when someone notices my loss- seems I'm always quick to be like "Oh tahnks, but I have a lot more to go", or "Oh thanks, but I still look terrible" I've been making an effort when someone notices my loss to simply tell them, Thank you mention that I've been working on it- etc, and take the compliment for what it is. It's weird to have to force yourself to think that way honestly.
    Started a new work out routine too- makes me feel a lot more accountable for my weight loss as well, it's the 30 day ab and 30 day squat challenge...it's no joke, and I've added my own arm work outs to it as well, hoping to tone up this lose skin. I'll keep everyone posted on the progress as I go, right now I'm only on day 7, but it feels good!!
     
    Best of luck fellow sleevers, hope to hear back from you soon!!!

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