Dobeigh

This afternoon I had my one month check up with Dr. Fowler, although technically it is almost 5 weeks. According to his scale, I weighed in at 278. I weighed myself this morning and was 276 on my scale at home (which is a 1 lb difference from his...I already figured that out). So within a few hours I gained a couple pounds, but I'm not worried about it. I had done a lot of cardio and drank a lot before my afternoon appointment. I think I will stick to morning appointments from now on though because I don't like to see the number go up in a few hours ...no matter what the reason is.
 
I was able to ask him some questions that I have been wondering. First, I had a 38 bougie used on my tummy. He said he always uses this size. He used to use anywhere between a 28 and 60, but over the years they have found that a 38 has had the least amount of complications. I was worried this was big and did some research on the net as to what the difference is between a 32 and a 38. Well, it is miniscule. Anyone who is worried that a 38 is too big has nothing to worry about. It is literally the diameter of a pen and a 32? Well just a smaller pen. Compared to the size of the stomach before it is a huge difference! I'm not worried anymore now that I understand how miniscule the differences are.
 
I was also able to ask him about my calorie intake. It has been bothering me for some time that I am rarely hungry and get in about 300 to 600 calories daily. There are others who can eat twice as much as that and had surgery the same week. I was worried that I wasn't getting enough nutrition and that it might stall my weight loss. He basically told me not to worry about my calories. He said I wasn't losing weight super fast so it isn't even an issue. He just told me as long as I am getting my protein, water, and vitamins in that it basically doesn't matter. As to why I am rarely hungry, he said that was a sign that my body is still in ketosis. Yay! I feel so much better. I will not be forcing myself to get in more calories than my body wants anymore. I am just going to listen to my body. One more thing I have to work on is not eating until I am full. I want to learn how to eat until I am satisfied which requires me eating super slow. I still haven't mastered that one yet! But that is my goal as far as eating goes.
 
I joined the gym today! Yep, I finally got down to it. I have had a gym membership pretty much my whole entire life except for the past two years. I canceled it because I just wasn't using it. Well, I joined. I actually sat in the car for a good half an hour just staring at the gym. I had a little anxiety about walking in there. Is everyone going to look at me? Are they going to be rude to me? Well I got over it. I just said in my mind I need to do this for me. I got signed up and did my 60 minutes of cardio. For me, it is so much easier working out in a gym setting. I hate working out at home. I love being able to focus on no one, but myself. I love blasting my music and tuning the whole world out. It is my peace and quiet time. I think that is why I used to love going to the gym before. It is almost like meditation for me. It was exciting and I am not even tired.
 
So all in all, today was a good day. No, it was a great day! I am so looking forward to my weight loss with my tool and my newly added gym membership.

I have a best friend.
 
We met in 5th grade & are now 25.
 
We are a match made in best friend heaven, perfectly weird complimenting personalities.
 
Since High School we have been on the journey (among others) of being fat together. We would eat constantly, joke about how fat we are. It was our thing, eating was our best social time, nothing is better than mindlessly stuffing your face while having great conversation. When we weren't eating we'd joke about how fat we were & that "tomorrow we'll get skinny" as we stuff another cheeseburger in our mouth. Sure we had our brief periods of "getting skinny", they never lasted. We'd get bored, so we'd eat. We'd get sad, so we'd eat. We'd get drunk, so we'd eat. We'd be social, so we'd eat. Everything in our life came back to food.
 
In September of this year I came to her with the idea of WLS & doing it together. We talked about how AMAZING it'd be to be skinny, but how scary it was, & what a huge life change.
 
The subject was dropped. December rolled around & it was brought up again. Maybe we could do it, a mutual friend had VSG 8 months prior & is already down 100 pounds! WE could lose a 100 pounds, if we just make the sacrifice. It was decided, WLS was what we needed, both individually & together.
 
In 2013 I will undergo the biggest change of my entire life & be lucky enough to do it WITH my best friend. I can't wait to actually see us skinny.
 
(If you'd like to look her up it's JPSnAZ, she a hoot)