Jen35

I've probably heard them all:) The problem with the chess analogy is that it's comparing apples and oranges. The impulse to eat (and therefore the cravings) come from the brain stem or "primative" brain. Our cognitive abilities (logical/rational thought, knowledge, etc.) originate from our frontal lobe. This is information from my therapist, by the way. Which is why I could read every diet or self help book out there, know all the right things to do to be healthy and, yet, I didn't put it into action. Eating is necessary to sustain life and is associated with comfort, love, and survival. Chess - you can live without. To me, this analogy is no more than saying "you don't have any discipline or self-control" which many people believe about overweight people. That is so far from the truth! For people without food issues, eating disorders, etc., give that advice to "just stop eating", "just count calories" just... just.... Not everyone's brain is wired the same way. Not everyone can do this on their own. I know I "just" needed the surgery and a TON of therapy to lose this weight and those stupid advice-givers can "just" kiss my tush now!

Not keflek, he gave me carafate

MD said it could be an ulcer or gastritis, putting me on Keflek, which will coat my stomach, esophagus,etc. If it's an ulcer that will give immediate relief and we will then treat the ulcer. If that doesn't help, it may be a sphincter of odie issue (I need to research that), pancreatitis or something else, and we will do other testing to determine. I also see my surgeon next week for my 1year appointment, so I will also get his opinion.

Rena- I'm 12 months post surgery and havent had issues with alcohol until recently. I could have 2-3 drinks over the course of an evening without issues. But I agree with everyone that I should stop all alcohol for now. That's not a hard thing to do (and if it is, then I have bigger problems!) I do enjoy drinking socially. Whoknows- I thought about that, but they didn't say it was a kidney infection and I've finished the antibiotic and the pain is still there. Mrs.RRn- I don't know if they ran the pancreatic enzymes. I'm going to have my doctor request the ER records. I'm actually in the waiting room now. I hope he can shed some light on what's going on. Thanks for all your responses. It really helps to get others perspectives.

Wow, I'm so sorry you have to go through another complication. I also thought I am out of the woods since I am one year out, but now I'm worried. I've been having abdominal pain under my ribs on my right side. I actually went to the ER a week ago for it, but the CT scan and blood work was clear. I think there is something going on - I see my regular MD tomorrow. I would think that if it is my stomach, the pain would be up higher. Thanks for sharing. It's always a good idea to be careful with our tummies:-)

Some of these symptoms should like what I have been experiencing pretty regularly but I don't think it's dumping. I have always had some IBS issues, but lately they are more and more frequent and I can't always pinpoint what causes the episodes. It usually hits me within 30 minutes of eating. Starts with severe cramping like gas that is trapped in my abdomen and I know I have to find a bathroom. Then I'm usually there for 20 minutes of cramping, and well, you know.... then it passes and I'm okay. I don't usually get the sweating or chills, and I don't pass out. It's almost a daily occurrence at this point, and it's very inconvenient, uncomfortable, and concerning. I've had this happen after eating ice cream, but also after eating a salad, so I really don't know what to do.

I would like to attend this group. I'm on the Illinois side and about a year out from surgery. Thanks for getting this together!

It really sounds like self-sabotage to me. And I'm not saying that to be judgemental - I know where you are coming from. I have sabotaged myself for years prior to the sleeve. I knew going into this surgery that I had issues with food. I abused it and I abused myself with it. So I started counseling 5 months before getting the sleeve because whether or not I was approved for the surgery, I knew my head had to change in order to have any lasting positive results. I am one year out and I'd been seeing my counselor EVERY week since (until she recently moved out of the country). I still feel some of my old issues resurfacing so I'm going to have to find a new counselor. My point is - get some help with these issues. You aren't alone in feeling this way or having these issues with food. But to be successful and, most importantly, not physically hurt yourself, you need to find out why you behave this way and figure out how to love yourself. You are worth the effort to take care of yourself. I honestly do not think I would be were I am without the couseling.

I haven't been on the site for several months. I went back and read this post and it's kind of surreal that I'm at goal now. I was sooo excited to be a size 14/16. I've come a long way since then and I'm now a size 8/10. What hit me (hard) is that I've lost this excitement that I had. I'm not sure why. Maybe because I'm focussing so much on what I don't like about my body and less on my success. I have loose skin on my tummy and inner thighs, the girls have lost quite a bit of substance and perkiness (if you know what I mean). I'm so glad I had had surgery and lost the weight, but in the back of my mind I must have thought that I would have this rockin' body after I lost all the weight.... and I don't:) lol! Swimsuit shopping has not been fun and I really though it would be. Guess the body image issues never completely go away. My counselor moved out of the country a few months ago - I guess it's time to go find a new one!

So I was shopping for new jeans this weekend and started in the Women's section of the store. Took a bunch of clothes into the dressing room (I think I have a shopping problem!) and realized as I tried on each item ... THEY WERE ALL TOO BIG!!! So I ventured over to the MISSES department (haven't shopped there in 10 years) and I fit into the L/XL shirts and a size 16 in Levi's. OMG - I am no longer in Plus sizes!! I was jumping up and down and giggling - I'm sure the other shoppers thought I was insane. But I was sooooo happy, I can't even begin to expain it Unfortunately the Levi's didn't fit me quite right, but I proceeded to New York & Co. and got my first ever pair of skinny jeans in a size ... wait for it... 14!!!! I started this journey at a size 22 so I'm just a little flippin excited

Awww, thanks for the compliment:) I would like a tummy tuck but not sure if the insurance will cover it, so it may be a while before I can get that through. It may be about the same time! I don't like the idea of another surgery but after all this work, I would like this skin gone. But even if I don't get it, I'm still so much better off than I was 90+ pounds heavier.

Wow - I can't believe it's coming up on my one year anniversary since my sleeve surgery! I'm so happy I did this - it's been an emotional journey but I'm so much better for it. I started at 244 lb., it was hard to move, tie my shoes, etc. My blood pressure, blood sugar and cholesterol were all borderliine high and getting higher. My knees hurt all the time. I hated the way I looked and felt. Now, I'm 151 lbs. (my original goal was 150) and I can move easily, ride my bike, jog and I LOVE being physically active. I can do things with my kids without getting so tired. My blood pressure was 100/66 yesterday, blood sugar, cholesterol all wonderfully normal now. I love my new outlook on life. It wasn't an easy decision to have the surgery and I had some bumps along the way (gallbladder removed 3 weeks after surgery). But my journey, overall, has been a smooth one, physically. Emotionally and mentally is another story. THAT was the hardest part for me. The issues that I had/have tied up in my relationship with food and my body image run deep and they are complex. I've been going to a therapist since 6 months prior to surgery. I'm not sure that I would have been as successful without that piece of the puzzle. I think I would have lost weight, sure, but would I have reached my goal, would I have gained it right back, would I be as happy? I'm not sure. All I know is that I feel more accepting of myself now than I ever have - even when I was thin in my early 20's. Losing the weight was a (small) part of that. Understanding why I abuse food and my body, getting over (most of) my self hatred, and being aware of my bad habits and replacing them with healthier ones - these were more important to my mental well being than the surgery. My biggest take away over the last year - my advice to anyone who is starting down this path: The surgery is a VERY helpful tool to lose the weight. BUT more is involved in this process to be a happier, healthier person. Just as important, if not more so, is to do the mental and emotional work. At one of my first sessions with my therapist, she asked me how will having this surgery make you happy. I wasn't sure - I just knew it would. But she helped me realized that losing the weight doesn't equal happiness. I'm still going to be the same person, have the same issues, problems, etc. My life wasn't going to magically be wonderful just because I'm thinner:) Congrats to all of you who have hit your one year anniversary (and every anniversary thereafter). My hope is that I can maintain my loss over the long run, but I know my journey isn't over. In some ways, it is just beginning.... but I can DO THIS!!!

Wow - we are really close in stats:) I was sleeved May 22, 2013 started at 244 and I'm at 151 now. I'm still losing slowly a pound or so here and there. I'm shorter than you though (5"4'). You are looking awesome! I agree - it is very surreal to be almost a year out and be successful. I guess I was always afraid in the back of my mind that I would somehow fail at this too. I've failed at losing weight for so long - it's almost a dream to be at my goal. My new goal is to firm everything up. I haven't done as much weight training/exercising as I had planned:( but I'm trying to fix that now. I do have a lot of tummy skin (that will hopefully be removed in the near future - fingers crossed). That's not going away with weight training, but the inner thigh and arms I'm hoping will firm up. Keep up the amazing work and let me know how the firming up works for you:)

Thank you!!! I'm honored that your first post was on my thread. This is a great place to get questions answered and get a feel for what to expect as you start down this road. I remember being in your shoes and I had a ton of questions. I was sometimes scared by some of the posts (complications) but they helped me to realize that this is a big step and complications are unlikely but DO happen. It's good to be prepared for any outcome. BUT you will do great!! I hope you love your sleeve as much as I do! Reach out to me anytime - you can message me if you want.

Hey there, I'm new to the forum and have my first appointment with my doctor in 2 days. Just wondering if anyone on the forums are in the St. Louis area? I'm going through the St. Alexius New Start program and my surgeon is Dr. Richardson. If anyone has had him for their surgery, please let me know your thoughts and experiences. All the info on this forum is wonderful. It's really helping me as I start this journey to the best version of me I can be:) Thanks!

Most of us know what we need to do to be healthy. We know what foods are good for us, that we should exercise, etc. but our frontal lobe (the part of our brain responsible for logic, reasoning, etc) is not the part of our brains causing us to turn to food for comfort. It's our brain stem - that part of our brain that tells us that food is necessary for life. That need gets all tied up with our need to feel better about all of our tramas (childhood abuse, adult stress and trama - all of it) and we use food as a drug to make us feel better. The problem is in the avoidance of our emotions instead of facing them head on. At least, this is the conclusion I have come to after a ton of therapy. And maybe this isn't true for everyone, but for me - I used food to not feel - to not remember the terrible things of my childhood. If I ate, I didn't feel those crippling emotions that I didn't know how to deal with - I never learned how to deal with. My mom died when I was 10 (but was sick for years prior) and my father didn't know how to be a father. At the end of the day, if we were all alive, fed and had a roof over our heads, he had done his job. No emotions were allowed in the house, especially no tears. I grew up with the responsibility of the world on my shoulders and the feeling that I had to just power through every situation. No emotion, no tears. As a teenager, I sought male attention to have some form of emotional connection with others, even if it was only physical. When I later married, I turned to food to keep from feeling and dealing with life. All of this insight helps me see where I need to change in my coping mechanisms. Some days I'm better at it than others. I still want to turn to food and sometimes I do. But I know why I'm doing it and I have more skills to work with from the therapy. And I'm moving forward, which is more than I did before. We all have our reasons for eating, The hard part is figuring out why and then working on changing our behaviors. It's the most difficult thing I've ever done in my life.

I'm so glad you posted this! There are so many strong people on this site posting about their struggles with addiction. I know it's hard to share such personal information, but it really does help others to know they are not alone and that addictions can be managed. I am a little over 6 months out and I can see some tendencies toward other addictions. I'm certain I am a food addict and I've been in counselling for a year now. Just the reaction I had after my sleeve surgery when I couldn't eat my feelings anymore - it was the WORST feeling I've ever had. I used to eat until I was numb and was "high" on food (I compare it to getting drunk). I can't do that anymore so my brain automatically wants to look for a replacement. I'm really keeping an eye on my drinking, shopping, etc. The counselling has helped me be aware of my issues and, if I'm aware of them, I feel like I'm gaining some headway to healing. It is also helping me to feel my feelings instead of suppress them with whatever (food, alcohol, etc.). It's a really difficult process, especially when you suffer with anxiety and depression. My brain really fights feeling my emotions! I've used these coping skills my entire life and now I'm trying to change - very hard thing to do. So I guess my point is that none of us are immune to the possibility of other addictions. But awareness is the key. If you are aware of the problem (or potential problems) you can get the help you need. Hang in there - you're not alone - and YOU CAN DO THIS:)

how people act around you after surgery and weight loss? I have a friend who is overweight (she's about 270 lbs). We've done weight watchers, etc. together and shared in our struggles to lose weight in the past. I was very open to her about my surgery and she said things like, "I would be terrified to do that", "It's so risky", "I don't think I could ever have surgery to lose weight". So I eventually stopped really talking about it with her. Now that I'm 6 months post surgery and down 80 pounds, I feel bad around her because EVERY time I see her, she brings up her weight and puts herself down. This week, we were talking about the kids and out of nowhere she says, "Wow, I really feel like an umpa loompa next to you." I don't ever bring up weight - she'll sometimes ask me how much I've lost or say how great I look, but it's usually followed by putting herself down. It makes me really uncomforatable, like the only thing she sees when she looks at me is my weight loss and her lack of weight loss. She has other friends who are really thin and always have been. Why does my surgery/weight loss define our friendship? It doesn't change who I am - it's just a physical characteristic.

Here's goes - my first update of my progress for the month. I've been going to the gym about 3 times per week for the last 2 weeks (I started a bit early). I wasn't working out at ALL before, so that is a win in itself . My goal is 20 hours this month and I'm at 6 hours so far. I also wanted to be able to hold a 1 minute plank and do 25 consecutive push ups. I am at a 40 second plank and 10 push ups. I'm starting to work with a personal trainer next week and I can't wait! I'm already thinking of goals for December. Thanks for starting this thread - I'm finally getting off my butt and motivated.

Thanks for the tip, Fiddle. I'm going to try that. I used to work out with a trainer (2 years ago) and I was pretty strong even for a "big girl", lol. And now I'm just a jiggly mess! I miss my muscles. Planks and pushups have always been my measure of how fit I am and right now I can only do about a 10 second plank and 10 pushups.

Hi, I'm Jenny and I really need this! My goal is 20 hours and the ablity to hold a 1 minute plank and do 30 consecutive push ups. These are no where near as big as all of your goals but I'm really just starting to get back to the gym. So, I'm a weakling - I'm just going to say it! This will challenge me and keep me motivated.

I have that too at 5 months out. I seems to have gotten worse as time goes on! It usually grumbles and then I burp. very annoying and embarrassing. I teach software virtually so I am talking on the phone for up to 4 hours a day. It's hard to hide sometimes!

I am near St. Louis and we just started getting pretty cold - like freezing temps at night and only upper 40s in the day. I am about to die from cold! My husband wouldn't turn on the heat until it was 65 in the house - so he finally turned it on today. My hands are always like ice! I just bought an electric blanket - LOVE it! It goes with me from room to room.

I'm sorry but that is BS! yes you can have withdrawals from sugar and carbs but not such a severe headache. Dilaudid is nothing to mess with. When the nurse gave it to me for pain, it was at night and I was pressing the call button before the door closed all the way from her leaving the room. I thought I was having an alergic reaction because it immediately whooshed through my body, tingled up my neck and made my head feel so strange. It was aweful. She said it was normal to feel that. I guess I could never be a druggy - do not like that feeling! lol:)

Why in the world would they put you on Dilaudid for 3 days? I had a morphine pump for one day and then the sent me home with loretab. I had my gallbladder out and they gave me dilaudid once and I said NEVER give that to me again. My head was spinning all day - it's so strong! I hope you feel better soon. I agree that he should be reported.