Globetrotter

Please don't flame me CherylJane but, with all the issues with your hip, why did you tempt fate by going on a hike? It took 6 months of doing NOTHING remotely strenuous to get past the bursitis in my right hip, and it took that long because I was so pigheaded about wanting to continue my exercise regimen, wanting to do my yoga, etc. I did 868 cals yesterday but only managed to get to 41g protein. The big calorie user was the avocado I had for lunch, 300 cals by itself! But the nutritional payoff is such that I am willing to incur the "cost". I guess I am going to have to double up on my protein shakes if I want to make the daily recommended minimum of 60g. Doughnuts in the office today, I know my 5:2 peeps understand what it took for me to NOT have one! In four months I am taking my Mom to Italy - we are going to Florence for a week! Tickets booked, apartment booked, travel guides are being studied, we are excited! Neither of us have ever been and my Mother has only ever been to Mexico, Canada, and the Bahamas. I do NOT want to be fat for this! I want to be able to hike the Tuscan hills and wear beautiful clothes and get whistled at Above all, I do NOT want to be the stereotype of the fat American, too out of shape to wear anything but elastic waistband shorts and sneakers D: update: lunch with one of the bigger wigs meant I had to eat restaurant food. Luckily it was a slightly fancy place and I was able to order steamed mussels in their own juices so that 18g protein puts me at 60g protein, without having to drink 2 shakes, yay!

Elton Jon Ray Crochet ... I don't think it will have to worry about other children having the same name! I've said it before a dozen times and I will continue to say it - depression is heavily linked with diet and the vicious cycle has us eating more of the bad stuff to self medicate, but the tranquilizing effects don't last very long and we are left feeling worse than before. Also, I believe that most obese people were genetically predisposed toward depression - self medicating with food is how we treated ourselves before the intervention of drug therapy. Feed - how does your restriction feel? Does it feel nice and snug? Today I am having tea, a whole avocado, a protein shake, sardines, and a salad. I am tracking my calories once more, and I don't remember the post op protein goals, was it 60g? I had forgotten how much effort it takes to get that protein up there - all the aforementioned food will only get me to 34g and that's already 520 cals!

Denise, I would kiss a porcupine if it meant I could be at 140!!!! We moved offices this week, now we are crammed into what used to be a conference room, 8 people and a dog in a room that is barely 2 desks wide by 4 desks long :/ To make matters worse, we share a wall with the kitchen, which is a general gathering area, so it is loud AND the smells of peoples lunches comes wafting through, EFFING TORTURE. Today I have had tea, a plain cardamom roll, and a shake; I'm into this brand called Milkshake Bar, it is expensive but the most delicious shake I've had in four years of protein shakes so, worth it. Today is strawberry shortcake.

I am still doing (or doing again) 5:2.

She has a tendency to troll, tbh, always looking for a reason to be offended. Yes SarSar, I am in Seattle! About 7 months now, technically I moved here over 4th of July wknd but I was immediately recalled to KS as some of you may remember, and didn't get to return until Labor Day wknd so, I count my living here from 1 Sept. I just discovered a new protein powder called milkshake protein. It is expensive but tastes so incredible that I allowed myself some sample bags to help get me back in the saddle of protein first etc. I have learned how to make really tasty shakes over the last 4 years but these need no doctoring at all, the one I had yesterday tasted exactly like Ben & Jerry's Karamel Sutra Core!! My GERD is really horrible, I need to see somebody about it, but I am so tired of doctors. Today is lots of decaf tea, a protein shake, and a salad for dinner, probably topped with chicken or sardines. If I need a little dessert I will have some strawberry shortcake protein shake.

Hi all, the show went well, although only four of the 30-odd people I invited came :/ I'm going to make a point of doing nothing art related next weekend, if the weather cooperates I will spend the whole weekend outdoors

Cathy - no appetite, I get so caught up in my painting that I would rather paint than eat and food is just a hassle anyway. For example, I bought a whole roast chicken the other day and dinner has consisted of gnawing off a couple bites here and there whenever I get up to stretch from painting, lolol. Speaking of which, I have my first show this Saturday and if any of our peeps in the Seattle area were interested, I would be thrilled to have you there . It is a pair of watercolors and a bronze sculpture of my Father's (posthumous). I discovered oils and canvas for the first time in my life yesterday and .... there are no words. The best I can describe it is like, a perfect summer day, with Bob Marley playing in the background, you've got money in your pocket, and you're in love. I am so thrilled by them that I want to torch all my watercolor crap and only show off my oils My pieces are for sale, and I take commissions for portraits and other personalized works. I work in watercolors and oils, on vellum, canvas and wood, up to 18x24 (before matting/framing).

I still get the little red number, but when I hover over it, it gives me a list of all the things I (no longer) participate in, and never shows replies here, even when I come here and discover that there have been many new replies since my last viewing. Yesterday I ate 1/3 of a caesar salad and a slice of raisin bread. That's it. Today I have had lots of tea and coffee, 1/3 of the same salad (kept in the work fridge) and dinner will be some soup if I'm not too tired.

That's just awful all the way around Denise, hugs! Chimera - I agree, it's irritating that we no longer get updates, frankly every since it became Bariatric Pal rather than VST it hasn't been as useful or user-friendly. Why the H would they lump all bariatric folks food together under one heading? Plain stupid, I'm not interested in hearing how lap-band people eat or how roux-n-y'ers do it ... I am not quite across from Cornish, that's the main AMZ campus and I'm up the street at 8th and Virginia. This gallery is across from Mistral Kitchen, I'm starting to have 2nd thoughts and self-doubt after seeing some of their work in the windows...

Where are the pics Cowgirl!!

Finished a painting over the weekend, a snowy landscape, all those effing snowflakes, what a pain in the ARSE!! And it was gorgeous weather too, but I was committed to finishing that painting so I just got to enjoy the light from my couch and not on the beach. Plein Air may have worked for the Masters but it seems like a hassle to me There is this cadre of women who work on my floor, that just give me high school mean-girls flashbacks like nothing else. They are all clones of each other, dressing similarly, very thin, very blonde, and they have sour expressions on their faces all the time, or anyway every time I see them. it sucks.

Happy Birthday Coop! Much love from across the pond, mwaah! Feed - I pass this nice gallery every day on my way to work and one day I saw a big sign in the window, "Call to Artists" and I went on their website, contacted them, and found out that if I bring my work "hang ready" on the final Monday of the month, that they will show it for the following month. I think I will offer a composition landscape, a portrait, a still life, and I can't think of a fourth. I want to show my range. I have two commissioned pet portraits in the works, and I need to register my trademark etc. which I don't know how to do .....

Oh Coops! I was going to comment on how positive and awesome your post sounded and then I scrolled down and saw your next post and oh no, the crud! Have you tried a neti pot or steaming for your sinuses? Denise, I don't seem to be having any of the issues you mentioned but then I've only been on it about a month and a half and I've been on what my Dr refers to as a "baby dose". Perhaps it is a sign of how much I need it that it doesn't make me hyper, it makes me functional :/ The food is going alright, I'm eating one meal a day, lots of liquids, trying to limit the carbs. Yesterday I had gallons of tea all day and then a burger in the late afternoon. Not the right choice I know but it could have been a LOT worse and you know it! At least the burger was from a snobby Seattle place where it is all artisanal hand crafted grass fed blah blah I am proud that instead of caving to the desire to make a late night run to the market for ice cream, I instead picked up my guitar and practiced Hey Feed - got any pointers on how to go about a first hanging in a gallery? A gallery around the corner from work has an open call to artists and you can have your (prepped) art hung in the gallery for a show, and I'm gonna do it! But I've never done it before and my Dad isn't here to give me pointers...

So I ended up not having the sardines or salad, instead I had about 2 ounces of curried chicken salad around 2pm, then a serving of cashews and a serving of jack cheese for dinner. I was preoccupied with a new painting I'm working on so before I knew it it was 8:30pm and too late to make a real meal. Today will be same tea and milk, same protein shake, same curried chicken, and definitely the salad tonight - I won't let myself start painting until I've made the salad! I switched mood meds, per my Drs advice, from Zoloft to velafaxine and upon doing so I discovered that one of the side effects of Zoloft is weight gain! WTF!!! I never knew that!!! I'm not going to blame all of my gain in the Zoloft but hell, that couldn't have helped!!

Cath I have no idea as I am too afraid to step on the scale and see the unequivocal truth of my gain. I won't step on that scale until I have managed a straight week on post-op style eating or until I can wear one of my bras from 6 months ago without bubbling out of the top - whichever comes first! Yesterday I had lots of hot tea (liquid stevia sweetener), about an ounce of whole milk, that green chile and pinto beans I mentioned yesterday, and 4 slices of bacon. Today I have had the same tea and milk, a double dose protein shake (1 scoop health warrior powder/1 scoop Fit Frappe) made with water, after work snack will be a tin of sardines and dinner will be a romaine lettuce salad with homemade vinaigrette with an easter egg for protein lol. Saw my MS doctor yesterday; felt pretty let down. Even though I presented her with what feel like significant changes in my symptoms, she stuck to the notion that I need to get emotional help before she can do anything to help me physically. Is that a new way of telling a patient that it is all in their head??? Can acknowledging the importance of mental health itself be a way of reducing a patient's agency and trivializing their concerns? It felt that way. I remember the first time (post-op) I was able to put on a pair of size 16 jeans, I felt like a Real Girl, like a Winner! Today I am wearing a pair of 16's and do not feel that way about it. Exactly one year ago I was in a pair of size 10 Levis and a 34 DDD bra (I'm now a 38G). My GERD is such that I think I might be able to justify that endoscopic pouch reduction thing for insurance. I am 3.5 years out and if I do not take my daily dose of prevacid FIRST THING in the morning, I am in real pain all day that just gets stronger and stronger.

Okay, I've had protein shakes for 2 days, organ meat pate for dinner, a handful of cashews. Today I had homemade green chile and pinto beans, about 3/4 of a cups worth. It is so filling I don't think I will have dinner.

Coops, if Ensure didn't work, what about Boost? Perhaps just different enough? I have decided to do the difficult thing and do a hard reset, attempt to go back to post-op eating. It's like quitting drugs cold turkey - there will be a brief period of physical distress followed by a long coming-to-terms experience. I will have to address head hunger again, "work the program" physically and mentally. I use the parlance of the addiction community because, for me, I understand that my use of food is to cope and sooth and mask, just like any drug user. I will allow myself unlimited coffee and tea, but no more than 1 serving of coconut milk (used as creamer) per day. I already don't use sugar - I use liquid stevia. Coops, do you have that over there? It is a godsend for sweets lovers, 4 drops in my huge morning cuppa makes it very sweet. Anyone else that has gained back 10 lbs or more, have you noticed where it has landed? Mine has almost completely gone to my lower stomach, it is really really awful... In an hour I will have a protein shake and dinner will be some ground organ meat pate and chicken salad. Send positive vibes my way!!

Hi everyone, I am knee deep in conference mode so I have been MIA from this board. I feel humongous, im in humongous granny panties, mom jeans, resurrecting old tricks for hiding in plain sight v_v I waste a lot of time feeling worthless, it is maddening. I hate feeling worthless but I have yet to convince myself of my worth, for ANYTHING. If I could get my pouch reduced and get insurance to cover it, I would do it tomorrow. Suggestions welcome.

Sounds like she had a massive stroke/brain aneuryism, so sorry Kim.

Oh sweet Coops, I feel for you! You have my sympathy, sending you hugs! In my first regain I gained 30 lbs and then lost 50 with a return to post-op eating and 5:2. Now this is my second regain and It is probably like 60 lbs, I've stopped weighing myself which is a bad sign. Even more disturbing is that the 60 lbs has happened in 9 months. And no, I'm not pregnant, lol. When I came back from Afghanistan I was a size 10 or even 8, now I wear 18 "mom jeans" and I feel like a sausage. It's heartwrenching. My GERD is worse than ever, I would like to get a pouch reduction.

OMFG HAVE I MISSED AMERICAN MOTHER'S DAY?!!!! I'm in T-R-O-U-B-L-E .....

Don't forget how much bloat you probably have on board, what with all the medications, IV drips, etc etc etc. Once it is all flushed out of your system you will probably find that you haven't gained any weight at all. I'm feeling better, about the job, mentally, emotionally. I have sat down with my neurogist and I have begun the self care, I even have a prescription for MASSAGE! and it is covered by INSURANCE!!! I went yesterday and the therapist worked on my shins, she commented that I had some of the strongest/toughest shin muscles she has ever worked on! She drove all her strength into smooshing those muscles and the euphoria it released into my body was as good as the drugs I had after my spinal tap went wrong, as good as an orgasm! My big fat body still makes me sad but, through a combination of rising up the learning curve at work, new head meds and spring weather, I'm feeling better about a lot of things

Thinking of you Denise, and our friends beyond the pond, and Brown wherever you are ... Please practice self-care Denise and get yourself on some strong head meds, at least for the short term. Our minds and bodies are so interconnected that even the most upbeat attitude cannot totally overcome gut and brain trauma. See a counselor and love yourself <3

As toxic as their disbelief is, I have compassion for the FiL and BiL, they simply cannot handle the truth of her deterioration, she anchors their world and they are not equipped to face the loss. That's a lot of anguish and I hope all of you have access to support, respite and mental health. hugs from the PNW.

I have a lot of fear over losing my cognitive abilities and, ironically, stress will make even a healthy brain begin to have short term memory issues, word loss, etc. And the loss gives you stress and down the road it goes. I am now set up with the MS clinic here in Seattle, I've had my initial appt, and they want to put me on injectable drug therapy, rather than the newer pills. This stresses me out. I cannot handle constant injections, my skin and flesh are very delicate like an old person's and I bruise and swell awfully. I am seeing someone but it doesn't have long term potential. Being in his arms just feels so damn good though, and I'm in that phase where all I want to do is breathe in his exhalations and vice versa. I hate looking at my fatty fat squashy bulgy body in the mirror. Oddly enough I feel the loathing when I have clothes on, I actually look better naked than in clothes lol. Protein-heavy salad today with lots of herbal tea, probably pad thai without the noodles for dinner.