lauri

Greg- My prayers are with you. I know this is a hard time for you. When those that we love have been in pain, it really is comforting to know that they are not suffering anymore. When I miss my Grandmother and start to feel sad, I just imagine her singing those old time hymns at our saviors feet and thank God that she is in a wonderful place and that I will see her again some day. I will continue to lift you up. I can just bet that Delarla is a real beauty! I'm glad yall were able to meet and have a good time. Hey, Friday night-the family and I were just about to walk into a restaurant and I was telling my boys to remember their manners when all of a sudden the loud burp came from out of nowhere!!(I swear it has to be all these dang veggies!) Well, anyways my husband looked at me like, "How could you?" I just smiled and said, " Now, that's one to brag about!" My 10 yr old looked at his dad and said, "Well, atleast she didn't do it IN the restaurant!"

Thank you Rica and Marie. Marie-I am learning so much everyday. But, the thing that really has helped is realizing that there are other people-smart, funny, loving people that understand what I am going through because they have been there themselves. I don't feel alone anymore. If you guys can do it - I can too-with your help that is!

Rica-Usually, I would have left the room, eaten the brownie and then whatever else I could find. Getting on-line with you guys really helps me.

Jack-Sweets make me feel bad,too! But-I don't have freaked out brownie dreams! What's in that water your drinking, anyways? At lunch today, I looked around and so many people were eating all of this high fat/high carb stuff. You know what I did? I looked at everyone and noticed that MANY people are overweight. Strange, I have ALWAYS felt like the fattest person in a room. Today, I didn't-I wasn't. I ate a side salad at Wendy's(I couldn't even eat all of it). I felt proud of myself and I didn't get down on myself for eating unhealthy. Hey, NSV- DH said that I was looking skinny, today! AND a lady that works in the dressing room at Wal-mart told me that I was pretty. No one has told me that in a long time! You know, I felt skinny and pretty today. Sure, I have a long way to go but I feel good about myself today.

Leatha, which town is Dr. V's office in?

I am in some 18/20's, some 20/22's. (Down from 22/24!!!) Hey! Your about the same height as I am! By the way, I am looking for a dr. in this area that takes BCBS since Dr. Cribbons no longer accepts it. Any one know of a dr. around here.

Hey that's a good idea! I could probably eat a big Breakfast, and wear those 'heavy' clothes that I usually avoid wearing when I have to get weighed the next time I go to my dr.s appointment, too! I've still got to find a new dr. around here that takes my insurance! I guess I will start making calls Monday.

Those hubbys! I can do good all day-really not think about food much-just stay busy with this and that, nibbling on something healthy when I notice I'm hungry AND THEN he walks in the door. It's never, "Hello, My beautiful wife! I've missed you." or "Wow! You have really worked hard cleaning this kitchen today." No, he says, "What's for dinner?" or "What did you do today? What's for dinner?" Needless, to say he grabs a snack and continues to graze the rest of the evening. My daughter and I have actually started betting on that he is going to say. Whoever guess's it right gets out of dishes or something! We bust out laughing as soon as he goes back outside to check on the animals

Can you believe that I actually started to worry yesterday that I would lose too much weight and then the insurance would have another reason not to let me have the band!? Losing has been easier with all of you here for me but I am afraid of the yo-yo! I need a band. I must admit that for the first time in my life I am beginning to feel like I really could lose the weight and keep it off because of the wonderful, encouraging friends that I have here. Thank you so much.

Teresa- I,too, am a RANCH lover. That is a great idea. I'm going to give that a try. It's bad but I would rather not eat anything than eat a salad without ranch. But, I will always take a salad with home made ranch dressing. I can't even eat the store kind! Leatha and Teresa-Keep your chin up! You have been doing great. Don't forget to remind yourselves that you are replacing fat with muscle when you exercise regularly.

Welcome and Congrats on your band! You have made a great positive step for yourself. Keep up the good work. I agree with you about Ryans posts. They are thought provoking.

Marie! I had bought a sweater BEFORE I got my hat and THEY match, TOO! Isn't that cool? Becky-you rock! I am stylin' Someone actually said, "What a cute SET" the other day. ;')

You know, my husband gets picked on at work because he is so thin. He's a commercial plumber and most men in construction are kinda big. They actually call him names like-Gilligan, Woody and such. They always volunteer him to crawl into the small spaces and under buildings to fix others mistakes because 'he can fit'. He is often over looked when it comes time to choose a new forman. When he talks to the "higher ups" in the company, they tell him that they really need a BIG GUY for the job. I guess they want someone who can "push his weight around". I feel bad for him that he suffers from rude comments and job discrimination because of his size. It does hurt him but he rarely says anything. I guess that is why I was so upset when he said something the other night. My note went ok-I suppose. He read it and was smiling the whole time! Then, he laid it down and started laughing! "I can't believe you threw that brownie. You shook the wall!" He hugged me and told me that he does love me. He just knows how much I want to lose weight and how mad I usually get at myself when I eat something fattening. Any who, we were able to laugh about it and I think we came to a sort of understanding. I did ask him why he just went to sleep instead of talking to me. He said that he knew I was mad and figured I went to get on the computer and talk to ya'll. "I figured after you told them what an A**Hole I was, you would feel better and come back in here." LOL Hey! Is it Monday yet? Don't tell anyone but I weighed this morning and am at 219!!! Does that make me a teenweigher? Woo Hoo!!!

Ryan-you are sooo right! I have heard those exact comments, first hand. I just wonder if it hurts guys or if they just blow it off. Maybe, it just depends on their past experiences with their weight?

Alex-your right about not eating in bed. It's a Terrible habit-I know! For me, it stems from several years of insomnia. Be bored-eat and watch movies. That's how I ended up in this situation!!! DH eats his bed time snack every night right before he goes to sleep. We really do need to talk about this-Cause it is hard not to want to snack when he is! What? Is that what that table in that room next to the kitchen is for? Eating? I thought it was for homework, bills, and arts and crafts! I thought you eat at the computer, on the couch, driving down the road, or in bed! Ryan-it's nice to have your input. I am sure you are right. He probably didn't have any idea how much it would hurt and really does want me to be happy. Thanks for providing a male point of view. It really does help. Teresa- Thanks for affirming my feelings about a "treat" now and then. I figured it would help me not to feel deprived. If I can "ocassionally" eat just a bit of something I like then maybe I won't feel so frustrated. I could ENJOY myself and know that it's ok because I have worked so hard. AND as all of you know-it really is WORK to watch what/how much you are eating!!! Lisa! you crack me up-are you sure you aren't a stand up comedian in your spare time!? I can always count on you to make me laugh-and after all isn't that supposed to be the best med? Well, anyways-you make alot of sense. DH assures me that he loves me, no matter what, and that he always will but I have trouble feeling it because of ME. I realize that I, too, can be a real bitch. I've told him before that I wanted to leave sometimes but it's not HIM that I want to leave-it's ME! I am trying to become someone that I can love and then maybe I will be able to feel the love that my family trys to give me. I am going to write him a short, to the point-but not pointing - note today. AND THEN try to talk to him-maybe he will bring it up. THANK YOU ALL.

:think I got a rejection letter from the insurance today! Can I just say- They stink!!! I actually have some much stronger adjectives to describe them but I will spare all of you the cursing. Our reviev determined that the denied services(Lap band) requested are NOT MEDICALLY NECESSARY based on the following: There is no documentation of 12 continuous months of medically supervised weight loss program that includes nutritional therapy, behavior modification, supervised increase in activity, pharmacologic therapy-unless contraindicated-and maintenance support. This 12 month program must have been in the last 24 months. Programs such as weight watchers or Jenny Craig are not considered medically supervised weight-loss programs. Anyways-I am upset to say the least. I have been through so much to try to get approved. How can they say it's not Med. necessary? With all of my medical problems, I am in the dr.s office atleast 2-3 times a month! Medical equipment for sleep apnea(which is probably due to weight!) Medications for depression, anxiety, migrains, etc...... Don't they understand that if I lose weight-many of these problems will go away?! I have so many thoughts and frustrations going through my head right now! This surgery has been the only source of hope that I have had that I might be able to actually live a normal life. I am trying not to have a "melt down" but I just feel like my rug between hope and hopelessness has just been yanked out from under me! What do I do now?

Thank you both! I will work on it.

Thank you. I don't mean to be such a cry baby.:cry Your idea about a note is a good idea. I was actually tossing that around in my head this am. I know he loves me and really doesn't mean to hurt me but he is very bad at communication. I am sure you are right about him trying to help-I JUST REALLY WANTED THAT BLASTED BROWNIE!!!! :lick Well, today is my first day at home by myself in over a week. So, I am going to go to Curves and relax. My youngest son has been very ill (I'm sure that had nothing to do with my frustration) Again, thank you! I needed some perspective and well....just someone to listen. (((Hugs)))

Thank you all for taking the time to read the letter. I appreciate the in-put. Zoe-the actual letter has appropriate spacing and a professional heading. I still need to work on the grammer and structure some though. But for some reason when I cut and pasted it-it changed some????? Who knows? Computers are weird!

Babs- I am just now reading this thread. (((hugs)))to you!!! I can certainly understand your frustrations and I am glad you were able to atleast let it out so that we can all be here for you. I wanted to let you know that MY hair has been falling out for the past 2 years. My husband felt like it was stress/I thought maybe thyroid/at any rate-I started using a generic Rogain from Walmart 2 1/2 months ago. It's only $19 for a three month supply. My hair is really coming back! Good luck to you. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Thank you Blossom! Is there anything I should take out/add? I want it to be just right. Honestly, I didn't even know how to start or what to say.

Sonia, the more you educate yourself and your husband the more at ease you will be. You see the scary thing is not really the surgery-it's NOT having the surgery. If a person is carrying around all of this extra weight, it is killing them. Complications are a minor thing when we consider the alternative. But, really-the band is very safe. Most people do great. Continue to read posts and do your research. You will do fine. Good luck to you!

Congratulations! A splenda shortage-Good Golly Miss Molly-What's the world coming to? I'm glad I have my box from Sams,too! I bet I buy another when I go Saturday. Hey......maybe it's a plot.....let's tell them that there is a shortage and they will buy, buy, buy!

Well, I'm not doing what I want to be doing either. Worked hard to get a degree(single mom of two....married....single mom of three) and worked for a year, got sick-had to leave my job.....ended up getting married again(to a wonderful guy) found a job, worked for a year and got sick again. Now, I am subbing and fighting with the insurance company so that I can really be healthy. 60,000 dollars in student loans, medical bills out the wazoo, and 4 kids-don't leave me much choice. I need a good paying job with group insurance and I need it now. My husband is in the same position. He started working for a plumbing company while he was in school to be a Physical Therapist and the next thing you know IT IS ten years later and he is a licenced plumber and he can't afford to change because his wife can't get a job that pays enough. It's funny how things go. Not funny Ha Ha-but funny weird. I really believe that most people are performing JOBS that they really wouldn't have chosen for themselves. I always said that if I HAD to work- I wanted to be a stay at home mom like my mom-I wanted to do something that made a difference in the world. That was why I chose teaching but you know the truth is, we don't have to work a certain career to make a difference. If we are loving parents, children, and friends we are making a difference. Ryan is right, each of you that come here and provide support, love, and friendship are making a difference. I think in my case you might have saved me from myself. I love you all!

(Sorry it's kind of long. I got sort of carried away) Dear Medical Review Department: Recently, you sent me a letter denying me weight loss surgery. I would like for you to reconsider this important decision. My life is literally in your hands. My name is Lauri J. I am Thirty-five years old and I am morbidly obese. From the age of eight, I have struggled with my weight. Honestly, I can not remember a day when my weight was not the first thing on my mind when I woke up and the last thing I thought about before I went to sleep at night. It has effected every aspect of my life for many years. When I was young, my main concern was how I looked and what others thought of me but now, I am extremely concerned about my diminishing health. I’m sure you are aware that the risk of death and serious health problems increase with excessive weight. Obesity is a major risk factor for serious medical conditions such as: • Type 2 diabetes • Hypertension • Heart Disease • Stroke • Sleep Apnea • Respiratory problems • Cancer • Osteoarthritis • Joint pain Dr. Cribbons at Plano Medical Center calculated my BMI at 43.8. This places me in the Morbid Obesity category which represents individuals who carry the largest and most dangerous amount of excess body weight. Morbid obesity is a chronic condition that is difficult to treat through diet and exercise alone. According to the National Institutes of Health, Morbid Obesity Surgery is the best option for people who are morbidly obese and cannot lose weight by traditional means or who suffer from serious obesity-related health problems. My medical records show extensive health problems. I suffer from sleep apnea and must sleep with a c-pap every night. Obstructive sleep apnea is resolved or improved in almost 84 percent of patients according to an article in an October, 2004 issue of The Journal of the American Medical Association. I have pain in my knees, hips and back because of the extra weight that I am carrying. This affects my ability to exercise, play with and take care of my children, have sex with my husband, get in and out of my car, clean house, and many other activities. Just moving from one place to another often causes me shortness of breath or fatigue. Because of my health, I have lost my teaching job. This is causing my family extreme financial difficulties. I have applied to several school districts and been called for interviews on a few occasions. The phone calls from principals go great and they are eager to meet me but, when I walk into the office, things change. As much as it hurts, I understand how they feel. If I had to make the choice between two individuals with similar qualifications but one was thin and probably healthy or a very fat person who might have high blood pressure, heart problems, or who knows what, I would more than likely hire the thin individual. Not to mention the fact that people who do not have weight problems very often think that because you are fat you must be lazy. I don’t blame these individuals. Our society stereotypes fat people. They are often the target for cruel jokes and ridicule. The many insults, rude comments and attitudes, and general societal disgust with fat people coupled with everything else I have experienced has caused me to avoid social and many other situations where I might come in contact with people I do not know. I become very anxious just thinking about meeting new people. I have never met any of my husband’s friends or work associates because I do not want them to think bad of him for having a fat wife. There are many times that I don’t go to my children’s school parties, field trips, or other activities because I just can’t face people and their attitudes toward me anymore. Depression, low self-esteem, societal rejection and prejudice, lesser work and income opportunities, marital, familial, social and sexual problems add to the burden brought on by my weight. The National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute define obesity as a complex, multifactor disease that develops from the interaction between genotype and the environment. Obesity is not just a cosmetic consideration; it was been classified as a chronic disease in 1985. The National Institutes of Health report that 90% of the people who participate in diets and weight-loss programs do not lose or sustain a significant amount of weight. They suggest that morbidly obese individuals may want to strongly consider weight-loss surgery when other therapies have failed. I have spent countless amounts of time and money in diets and low-calorie/low carbohydrate foods and drinks, exercise programs and other weight loss treatments which, even if successful, only offered me temporary relief. I need this surgery. Studies have shown that weight-loss surgery provides the longest period of sustained weight loss in patients who have failed with other attempts. For many years, I have watched my mother (who is, also, morbidly obese) suffer physically and emotionally. She has been disabled since her forties. She has had both of her knees replaced, suffers from high blood pressure, and extreme depression. Now, her hips need to be replaced. I need help before irreversible damage is done to my body. I am a mother of four beautiful children. I have already missed out on so much of their lives because of this extra weight that I carry around. They want their mother to be able to play on the floor with them and go to the park. They need me healthy and strong so that I can care for them. I want to live long enough to see my children grow up. I need to be able to provide for them. How can I teach them to be productive members of society when I can’t even get a job. Who will pay for them to go to the doctor, or to college for that matter? I do not want to waste one more day of my life. I want to live. This weight has such a negative impact on the quality of my life and is shortening the quantity of my life with each passing day. You can help me live longer. You must see, as my doctors and therapists do, that this surgery is very necessary for my survival.