lisacaron

I am right there with all of you. I had my surgery on May 6th. and have been stuck for the last month at the same weight. I am happy it's not going up, and I am working on following all the guidelines. My first fill will be on Monday, so I hope that helps to reduce some of the hunger that I have between meals and reduce the amount that I want to eat during meals. I have to start putting things on a smaller plate, I think that will help to keep the "extra" out of the way. Sometimes I feel as though I need to eat it because it's on my plate until I realize I'm uncomfortable and shouldn't have eaten those extra spoon/fork fulls. I want to learn to STOP doing that, just because it tastes good, and I want to keep eating it doesn't mean I should be. That is something I really need to work on. I do feel like I am making better choices of food, but still those days of stress can put me over the edge, and I will admit I have taken that step back into old habits a time or two. Though having the band reminds me that I have taken a wrong step and I don't get very far on that path to self-destruction for that I am grateful!

I think it's worth it to call your insurance company and find out what the requirements are for them to approve. There are different standards and requirements for different companies and types of coverage. Some want a 6 month supervised diet and testing for co-morbidity's done prior to approval and some don't require anything more than the Dr. referral and a certain BMI. Calling and checking on what your insurance company wants helps you be more in the driver's seat to get where you want to go. Through my whole process, I kept tabs on the Dr.'s, the testing and the insurance companies. I fast tracked the things I was able to, and asked for copies of all the test and clearance letters to send to the surgeons office so I did not have to wait for the Dr.'s offices to mail out letters or get around to sending the fax on my behalf. That helped to keep things moving, and gave me a back up incase the insurance company or the surgeon's office or the hospital was missing anything.

Eating my stress away, and meeting Mrs. Strange It's one of those days! Have you ever had one? Where you go to sleep early you wake up late your hubby has been up hours ahead of you and is in a bad mood because while you were sleeping the insert curse word here (kids) yes that's the word I was talking about, went around the house doing their own thing with regard to nothing and no one. So that ticked him off and rightfully so, if I wasn't so tired I'd be upset about it too, but good grief I am sooooo tired of the drama and the stress. It seems like it's my life really, it's not just since surgery though surgery has changed the way I think about it all. Before surgery it was easy to ride to the local pharmacy or corner store and pick up a bag of chocolate go home and eat my stress and fustration away. Today it's not so easy to do. Not because I don't want some, but because I think about all I have gone through in the last month, and it's just not worth it to go backwards. I want to move ahead, I want to be healthy and bag of chocolate is not the healthiest choice for me to make and I wouldn't be able to eat a whole bag and I might just end up not enjoying it anyway since I have no desire for it to begin with. This is were Mrs. Strange comes in, that's how I feel about it all. As if there was this insecure and scared part of me that has had to grow up and deal with these little every day and not so little but for me just about every day!!!! Stressors. She has had to grow up and can't have her bag of candy, she has to deal with the feelings and the issues and cope with them in another way. She's not doing a bad job if I do say so myself, but in these moments….it all feels so strange. I feel so strange. I am not used to floundering through my feelings and my emotions, I'm used to just dealing with it head on and medicating it later with a bag of candy! I'm not as familiar with Mrs. Strange as I am with Mr. Hershey! Though I am getting to know her a little more each day. Mr. Band-it introduced me to her about a month ago. Mr. Band-it and I bonded instantly the day after surgery, he was part of my life. It's this new Mrs. Strange, who walks away from the candy isle and heads to the gym to work off her fustration and stress. Who sits here and watches all her co-works come up to the desk to take cookies out of the tin, and pretzles out of the bucket and thinks to herself as they all complain about eating yet another cookie, it would serve them right if I super glued the container shut. At least I would have something to laugh at watching them fight to get it open so they could reach those cookies and pretzles! I shared that thought out loud, and my boss laughed but later gave me that sideways look before he dived into the pretzle bucket, I'm sure wondering if I actually did or would super glue it shut Mrs. Strange has a way about her, but I’m starting to like her better every day! She and Mr. Band-It are getting along very well and helping me to make a lot of positive changes in my life.

This is one of those very touchy subjects. If you take just one moment and read what you wrote, there are some insights there. I'm so upset right now he tells me I have to go see a weekly therapist, I'm not quite sure how he expects me to put me first I have a family!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't know what to think right now I'm just sitting here crying ready to give up If you are feeling that way then there may be something to what the Dr. is trying to tell you. When we have a family it is VERY hard to put ourselves first in anything, but when you have a surgical procedure you HAVE to put yourself first. There are very strict guidelines and rules that must be followed, before and especially after. A surgeon is not going to risk performing a surgery on you if you are not going to make the time and commitment to taking care of yourself. It could spell disaster for him, but mostly for you and your family. Taking the time to see a therapist may just be the first step in the journey for you, don't be upset. We all have a different path, and it starts in different places and different ways. Don't give up, not on you or what you want if WLS is part of that don't give up on that either. You took the time to write this post, and to read the replies so take some time to think about taking the next step for yourself no matter what that may be. A 6 week supervised diet, a one year follow up with a nutrionist, a 2 week pre-op diet or checking in with a different doctor's office for another opinion or whatever it may be. Mostly make time for you, and you will make you and everyone you care for happy. I wish you the best of luck! Lisa Caron

It's never easy to lose someone you love. You are very strong to be going through all this surgical stuff and taking care of your family. I know it is hard to think about taking care of yourself when you are in the middle of so many things and emotions. I have been there and for me after it's all said and done and my adrenalin finally wears off I usually crash and end up sick in one way or another. So if you can find a moment, give yourself some love and understanding. Try to accept the help of others if it's offered, and get some rest as you are able. My thoughts and deepest sympathy are with you.

Great work! Keep your head high, and save the pity party for the jerks that don't know any better then to get drunk and act like Jack Asses. Your better then that!

Best of Luck! You will do great, and remember to move around. That helps so much after surgery.

Sadly that's what keeps hospitals in business. Sick people, so too keep business good and money coming in stands to reason they would serve food like that. I once had a professor who in telling a story about a surgery he had commented on how in the middle of this hospital he was in they had a "smoking room" where staff, visitors and even patients can go to smoke. Sounds crazy to be sure something so UN healthy in a hospital setting. I was taking a marketing class, so I commented that it was just more good business for the hospital. They are not "promoting" smoking but they are not stopping those who want to from doing it, after all that is their client base, and I'm sure they have a similar thinking when it comes to obesity. If you want to eat it here it is, but do so at your own risk. Kudos to you for not accepting it, and making your own wiser choice! That is not so easy to do especially when you are at the mercy of others.

You know I felt the same way for a second, after my surgery but we are losing. We didn't have gastric bypass we have a Lapland and we have to do the work everyone here is talking about. I am doing it right along with you and I want to say I am ONLY down 23 pounds but there is no only to it. I am down 23 pounds and proud of it and working hard to get that number to go lower every day. Sometimes I regret that people know about my surgery because I feel like they are all thinking oh she's still fat what is she eating? Should she have that? Really it's just me being self conscious but it's keeping me honest also. Some people do pointedly ask me "how I'm doing" but I just say great!

Greetings fellow Warrior! I'm right here with you! Been battling so much since surgery. Quick snap shot: Had surgery Husband had surgery Nieces communion that Sunday Pain in side Back to work 1 week after surgery Incision infected Drains for 2 weeks side sore wound is right in the waist where seat belt goes and work desk hits. Bad case of Bronchitis on 2 rounds of antibiotics Father in hospital for curated artery surgery 5 hour surgery touch and go ICU for a week. Son graduates from Tech School Guidance office calls to tell me if he doesn’t hand in report he will not graduate from High School! Father moved out of ICU Father in law has pulmonary blood clot and rushed to hospital Father in law in ICU Father released from Hospital on O2 24 hours a day at home now. Prom Father in law released from Hospital Graduation day is tomorrow night….(Sorry this is more like a portrait then a quick snap shot!) AND I am TIRED!!!!!!!! BUT I am still going to the gym, trying to get that 30 minute walk in every day at least and watching what I am eating. I am not losing the way I would like to, but the nutritionist says women's bodies are designed to hold onto fat when they are under stress, so that is something I am really trying to work on. Please count me in the Warrior club! I just downloaded the Couch to 5K app and will give it go this weekend.

Hi Missy, Thank you for sharing your powerful story. I feel as though you were writing that for me, it's something I fight with daily these days as this journey is just beginning for me. To take the time to do what I need to do for my health and not get lost in all the stress and drama life brings. To be grateful that I am alive and able to work toward being healthier every day and not let the stress keep dragging me down. Some of us have extraordinary stress, you are a Warrior my friend keep on being strong and inspiring us all to do the same.

Thank you all for your support. I know my husband felt really bad after he said what he did and we had a long talk about it later that night. It stems from his own frustrations about what is going on with him and his journey through this Lapland. He is so used to "seeing" large portions that when you don't you think this is not enough but it was more then enough for both of us. We are both newly banded just about 6weeks now. He could have spoken his concern in a more productive way then he did. I allowed it to get in my head and get me to feel like I failed. That is my error. I could have let the comment roll off and eaten my meal and walked away. That is a lesson learned for me. I am hungry and after seeing the nutritionist who also said she gives me permission to be mad at him for his comments and reading all your responses I feel better about things. She thinks I do need a fill and I will get one on my next visit in a couple weeks. I also am trying not to compare with the hubby cause he can lose weight sitting on a chair and I have to work for it. That's ok with me I'm committed he just is going to have to learn to pipe is comments cause if they are not productive and helpful or constructive I won't be listening to it. I always try to think about my impact on others when I do something or day something. I know when frustration and aggravation abound its not so easy to do but the consequences help us learn real quick. I think he got that lesson pointedly last night. We have to help each other not throw daggers that only hurts everyone. You all are the best thank you for being there when I needed you.

I'm feeling like a failure. I have been trying to do well. Making good choices going to the gym and pizza is going to kill me! Why did I order it? Why couldn't I stick with sharing the chicken parm dinner I ordered with my husband and get up and walk away? Why did I let him get in my head with his b*tching "what we are gonna SHARE THIS"?! I knew it was more then enough for the two of us. We are both banded and it was enough. But no he had to eat the pizza too and oopsie daisy slip fail and i had to have it too. Then he said oh YOUR gonna need a fill. Really just me? Why do we do that? I was ok with eating it I didn't push it got close to the line one more bite might have been my undoing but..did I need the comments from the peanut gallery? Now I feel like crap about myself sure he's sorry he said that NOW but the damage is done. It's in my head and on my mind. I have an appointment with the nutritionist in the morning and I don't know what she will say. I hope it's something motivating and positive and not comparisons of portion sizes to rubber food like I am 3 years old. Should I ask for a fill? I am 6 weeks post op. what's your advice?

I had that happen to me about 2 weeks after the surgery. The incision under my port incision opened up and drained out a lot of fluid. I called the Dr. because it got to be painful that the wound was open. It took a couple of weeks to actually scab up and I am now 6 weeks post op and it's just about healed to the surface of the skin but I still have a bit of a scab there. (I'm not diabetic don't know why it's taking so long to heal) The incision is right at my waist which is the worst place for it to be, my seat belt in the car is right at that spot so is my desk at work and my pants. So it has taken it's time but it is finally healed. Just be patient and keep the area clean and let it get air but try not to expose it to materials that are not clean or sterile until it stops draining. I had a pocket of fluid that built up between the muscle and the skin surface that opened the wound to drain out better out then in. The longer it stays in the more chance for infection. Hope you're feeling better soon!

Not bad. Feeling better finally the last two weeks how been rough for me. Being sick and both father and father in law in hospital for major issues blood clot in lungs and curated artery surgery. Planning graduation for the youngest of 5 boys I have been exhausted. I need a 36 hour day to fit it all in. Feeling so much better now though still coughing a bit. I made it back to the gym this week finally. Walking for 30 min gives me some time to unwind during the work day. Learning to enjoy it!! I think I may need a full but not sure. I get hungry often but don't really eat very much. I see the nutritionist tomorrow. I read we are supposed to eat three meals a day and be satisfied. They key for me might be smaller more frequent meals i dont know but the three meals are nit really working for me. How about you?

Is it the free app? There are a couple of them....is it Couch to 5K or the C25K?

I agree with what you wrote here. It's not that we are not trying to make "healthy" choices it's that we make more non healthy choices then we do healthy ones. We are all here for a reason, and we didn't get here just by eating lettuce and carrots. I am banded about 6 weeks now and I have not had a fill yet, and I find myself thinking about all of these issues. I know it's the only way I am going to be able to clear them up. To think about them and become more conscious of the choices I am making. It's great that I can no longer eat an entire pizza pie, but is that really the best choice for me to make to begin with? It's easy, and it's fairly quick, and that is yet another issue of mine, at work I'm great with my time management. I get it all done, efficiently and I spend the time making sure things are done correctly the first time and leave myself enough time to double check my work when I'm done. When it comes to myself and my own habits, I try to square root everything and make the easy and fast choice and I don't even take a second look at them after. I really need to work on that a lot more, and not just rely on the band to stop me from eating in excess but to be aware of how much I am eating, and when I am doing the eating and what exactly I am putting into my body. Thanks for calling me out on this, it's something I needed to read. I think that's a good thing about this forum. If we can't be honest here with ourselves then there is no place we can be.

Hi May Banders, How is everyone doing this June day?

The Warrior. I am not new to stress, any kinds of stress. I have it in abundance, it finds me no matter where or how I try to hide from it. I am not one of those people that seeks out drama and enjoys creating struggles in her life. I would much rather turn on the TV and see it play out there, where I can turn it off when it gets to be too much. My life is nothing like TV and there is no remote to change the channel or to mute the nonsense or abort it all together by switching it off. Nope not for me, some days I feel like it's a constant assault of one thing after another. Trust me I am not one of those people that makes mountains out of mole hills either. The stress I speak of is real, it is the stress of 5 children all over the age of 18 that can't seem to find their direction and all live at home with me. It is the stress of working 12 hour days 5 days a week with an hour each way to commute. It is the stress of sick in laws and fathers. It is the stress of burying ex-wives, and the untimely death of friends with megawatt high profile funerals to plan and execute. It is also the stress of good things like graduations and holidays. Weddings, and new babies being born. It is the stress of family, I'm sure everyone can relate, not need to expand here. There are days when I just want to cave in, I want to curl up and give up. If you knew me that would be one of the last things that this warrior would say or do, but it doesn't mean that I don't think about it, and just having those thoughts of giving up bring me even more stress because I know I am that low, and it is going to take me that much more work to pull myself up and out. I am the Warrior. I have spent my 42 years battling everything under the sun, yet the hardest battle there is to fight is the one against myself. I am my own worst enemy. I get so lost in the excuse of having to do this and that for all others that I lose the focus on what I really should be doing. I put aside taking care of myself and I say it's for this one or that one and what would they do if I didn't stop to do it or help them out? They can't get along without my help and my input right? The world as we know it might come to an end is my response. If you follow any of the movies Hollywood is putting out these days…that might just happen with me or without me helping. So why am I doing something for everyone but me? This year I vowed along with my husband that this was going to be the year I get healthy WE get healthy. Wait a second, I didn't realize that I was doing it AGAIN. I don't have to wait around, or put the fault on him or anyone else. If he can't walk or he's tired or my cousin bought a new car, or his having a baby, that doesn't mean I shouldn't lace up my sneakers and get that walk in today! My father is in surgery and my son is graduating and the tent my sister in law was supposed to lend me conveniently has holes in it from of all things ants, that or she just didn't like that I called her out last night on her bullshit, but either way that doesn't mean that I shouldn't make a better choice for dinner then Domino's pizza! Even if I can only eat 2 slices instead of half the pie it's still a bad choice. Wait a second, I think the bug zapper in my brain finally came to life, and zapped a few of those annoying thoughts that plague me with their incessant buzzing annoyance. You know the ones that I bred to keep me distracted and diverted from doing all the things I should be doing to make my life healthy. I went through major surgery to make my life better! I didn't just sit in some pretend yoga pose chanting I think I can I think I can I think I can. No, I really can! So what the heck am I doing? Why am I not getting my act together and getting out there and working out and eating better. I have NO excuse. I have to stop blaming everyone and THEIR problems. I have to stop making their problems my problems. I have to start taking care of my problems because I just realized no one else is going to do it! No matter how much I help them, they are never going to be able to help me with what I need. I have to open up and let go and start doing it and stop making excuses to myself about why I feel the way I do. So what you, feel the way you feel. Acknowledged now deal with it. Get off your ass and do something about it! I know I can, I will and I AM! Right now! Today! This very moment. I am the Warrior!

You're not alone my friend. I too had the hungry feeling and I wanted to eat some food. I had enough of the shakes and sweet chocolate and vanilla flavored whatever it is. I wanted something crunchy I wanted to chew something. I was looking for something savory and not bland or boring. Someone on here posted something that caught my attention, and I took that and ran with it. When my husband and I were past the liquid phase of recovery and were on to purred foods and then to mushy, one thing that helped me was making chili. The person had posted trying Wendy's chili and we did that at first before making our own. We bought a small chili from Wendy's threw in in the blender, got fat free sour cream and put a small spoon full in it. OMG my friend it was soooo good. It wasn't chicken broth, it wasn't Protein shakes, it wasn't pudding. It had the consistency of it, but it was a different flavor and different smell. You can do that with pretty much anything, that you like. A quick zip in the blender and it's baby food constancy with the taste you are looking for. Make sure that you put healthy for you foods in that blender though, after our shot with the Wendy's chili we made our own to cut the fat and calories. We made a turkey chili, loaded with vegetables and once they hit the blender it was good to go for our diet requirement. We have now progressed to solid foods, but still enjoy that turkey chili as a meal because it's so healthy with the all the vegetables in it. Good luck and don't let the feelings of hunger get the best of you. Sometimes we just need to satisfy our need for flavor or texture and there are loads of healthy choices out there that can fit the bill. With the new tool you have the help of the band to control the portion size, just pay attention to your body's signals to stop when your full and enjoy!

Try not to think of it as starting off on the wrong foot. It might not be the way you wanted it to start, and we all want to lose that weight quickly and feel better about the way we look and feel but we can't feel good about ourselves if we keep putting ourselves down. I had my surgery on May 6th, and I have lost 19 pounds so far. When I went to the Dr. for my one month follow up, I was feeling down and a bit disappointed because my husband who also had the surgery with me, 2 days later then I did had lost more weight than I had. He had a five pound loss in that 2 week period. Where I had actually gained back three pounds. I was about to feel all upset and depressed and start beating myself up, but you know…I can't do that to myself. I had an infection in one of my incisions, and then even as that was still draining out I caught a bad case of bronchitis I'm still coughing and sound like I have been smoking 2 packs a day for 40 years! (I don't smoke at all!) My father had to have major surgery and has spent the whole week in the hospital, my youngest and last of five son's is about to graduate and I get a call saying wait we can't find his report he might not! WHAT!!! I have been eating right, and before I got sick even with the infection was trying to walk 20-30 minutes a day. What am I getting at here? Simply this, stuff happens. It always will, and it's the way we deal with it and the way we treat ourselves that defines how we are going to feel. So instead of beating myself up, I patted myself on the back and said girl you have had one heck of week, and it's OK. Feel better, stay strong and you can do this because it's for YOU and you are worth it! This week I am feeling better, I lost the three pounds and though I'm still coughing and I haven't gone back to the gym yet, it's OK. Sometimes I know I push myself too far too fast, so I'll slow it down and I will get there and so will you my friend! Stay steady, stick to the plan and even if you hit a bump in the road now and then you know you can get up dust yourself off and get back on the track.

I have a question for everyone/anyone, is such a large fill a normal occurrence? I thought fills would be given slowly so the person could get to that green zone where they are comfortable eating and drinking in smaller portioned sized amounts? Am I off base with that understanding?

I am only recently banded one month to exact. I have had this trouble though before the band and now after the band. I feel sometimes as if my body is rebelling against all the changes I am trying to make for the health of it! I have a whole lot of stress chronic and nonstop, I'm sure lots of people can relate to that. Long work hours, new marriage 5 boys in total who range from 18-24 and have those large issues that come with older kids. I wish the only problem was making bottles at 5 am and changing diapers! Those were the easy days, you knew what to expect for the most part. Not to mention all the stress we get from the OLDER family like our parents. Who can't seem to stay healthy or out of hospitals them selves! Every other day someone is in the hosptial for some life saving reason. This last week, my father is in for another major invasive procedure without which he will die, and with which the chances are only 50/50 it all works out…I can't seem to win. Can't find the anti-stress button not for even a second! Anyway, add all that to changing my eating habits, and then adding exercise to it, sends my body into some kind of shock mode and it can't take the pace so it shuts down and forces me to take a pause as I struggle for at least a week or better with some sickness or another. This last week has been a BAD case of bronchitis. 2 rounds of antibiotics and only today one solid week later do I feel any better. I'm at a loss. I take my Vitamins, I try to limit the stress and get enough rest but there are not enough hours in the day and everyone is clamoring for something, the only rest I get is when I am alseep!

I was starving about a week after my surgery. Every TV commercial made me want to have anything that wasn't chocolate or vanilla! I found somewhere on here, a suggestion for Wendy's chili. Throw it in the blender for a second or two to mush it up and a scoop of fat free sour cream and OMG it was AWESOME. So good after all that shake and chicken soup. Give it a try you will love it and if you're really up for it, make your own Turkey Chili, lots of vegies and blend that all up for a second and you will be happy with your paste of chili trust me!

Greetings all, I am almost 4 weeks post op now, and I still have some tenderness when I move a certain way. I had a minor infection in one of my incisions, (the one right under the port) and that was kind of setback. I actually gained a bit of weight 2 pounds to be exact as the infection healed and the wound drained. It's amazingly strange how our bodies work. Once the infection cleared I lost the gained weight plus one more. We are still in the mushy phase of food, though I confess we have moved forward to things like shredded baked chicken. We are both doing well hubby and I. I try not to do the comparison thing as he is losing weight rapidly. He's about 33 pounds down since pre-op diet. Gotta love men's ability to lose that weight! Here I go though…long day at the office I've caught a cold everyone is SICK around me, and it's about 90 something degree's here in NY, but I am going to the gym! A mild stroll on the treadmill for about 20 minutes or so will save me from sitting in the 2 hour traffic pattern headed out East. Best to you all! Enjoy the weekend.