gowalking

Wonderful news Jenifer. So glad for you and Dave. Wishing you all the best.

It's not the surgeon who approves or denies the surgery based on qualifications, it's the insurance company. There's certain criteria that has to be met for insurance to cover the procedure but I've never heard of any surgeon changing a decision based on tears. I'm not saying your family member is in danger, but something doesn't sound right here. I bet she's leaving alot out of her story but that's just an assumption on my part.

Those NSVs you mentioned are more important than the number on the scale. Keep focusing on that, and you'll get past this little detour soon enough. Remember..this is not a linear journey. It's full of ups and downs...two steps forward/one step back. Just don't obsess or lose your momentum.

Wonderful news. Keep us posted.

Hi all you tri-state area BP friends. Please see below. I hope to see you on Saturday! The next NYC/LI chapter F2F Support Group Meeting is going to be on October 17th from 2PM till 4 PM We will be meeting at The Atrium at 805 Third Avenue. The building is on Third Ave between 49th and 50th Streets. The Atrium is at the back of the space on the lower level past the shops. We are looking forward to seeing many of our forum friends there for a fun filled afternoon. We hope to share a bit of information, education, and ultimately support with our friends!!! So mark your calendars today forum friends and make plans to spend a beautiful Autumn afternoon in NYC. If any Jersey friends want to attend, please feel free to cross the Hudson and join us. *Thanks to Laurie for reminding me that the AVON WALK for breast cancer is this weekend so please leave yourself some extra time to get around town if you are coming in for the meeting.

He sounds a little like husband #2. The paranoid tendencies and wanting to be away from people. I thought it was a quirk..and too late realized it was another reason we were so NOT compatible. Good for you for seeing it and knowing it was a deal breaker. I agree...lots of damaged goods out there. I was one of them for putting up with alot of crap from guys just to feel loved. Was never love of course and it was one of the many reasons I stayed away from the dating world for such a long time. I worked on other things like being a good mother, having good friends, and making myself healthier. Only then, did I go back to dating...and still I had to have professional help to keep me from making some bad mistakes.

Dr. Ren is my surgeon as well. Sounds like you have everything well in hand. If you're interested, we're holding a face to face support group on Saturday in Midtown for NYC and surrounding area WLS and pre-WLS folk. If you want details, just PM me. PS: love your pictures!

Yes. Yes. Yes. Let me say it again. Yes. This is truth. Remember the line from Jerry McGuire? 'You complete me'. No. No one should complete another. Compliment yes, complete...no.

I actually oversee data for a living so I am acutely aware that almost any data can be manipulated to achieve the results one is hoping for. I know this article can be misleading and statistics can be skewed. I was more curious as to what others on this site think of the article and if/whether some of us are at risk. Again...some folks get the surgery and live happily ever after but I know that for me, the past nearly two years has been focused on how to cope and deal with my issues without turning to food. Band or no band, I know I can gain every single pound back if I start to self destruct. I've done it before, and I know I can self sabotage again.

Here's the link to the article below. Just curious what you guys think. I think that there are lots of reasons why someone would want to harm themselves and there isn't specific data as to why...just that there's a possible correlation. My take on this is that food and overeating for many of us is a symptom. It's our drug of choice rather than alcohol or heroin. But just like someone in treatment goes through psychological help, so should some folks who have food issues as well. Obviously not everyone...but enough of us. I was banded in January of 2013 and a year and 100 lbs. later, found myself so very unhappy that I went into therapy. Now, I had other issues, but it started with the weight and still involves how my weight is and will always be, a huge part of my life. I feel like I have to be vigilant like anyone else dealing with an addiction. http://www.medpagetoday.com/PrimaryCare/Obesity/54035

Yes...I also have swelling and can't see the final result yet. But like you, the golf ball is definitely gone thank goodness.

Look who's wasting away to nothing! LOL!

Yes...people notice you. It can take a while to realize someone is flirting with you but it absolutely does happen. Prejudice? Maybe. I think it depends on the age/experience of the person you are dating. Most men who are older have their own body issues and do not expect perfection in a partner. In fact, a quality man will likely say things like my guy says...he is so very proud of me for tackling my issues of obesity and limited mobility. He loves to watch me thrill to the ordinary again as I engage in life rather than watch from the sidelines. If you are not ashamed of your weight loss success, the person you are with won't think about it negatively.

You show off all you want. Looking good!!

It took more than 100 lbs off of me to see the port they way you do now. I actually just had it revised a couple of weeks ago to a lower profile and the surgeon tucked it under the muscle so it wouldn't be seen. I would check with your surgeon just to make sure it's not too close to the surface. If it's that noticeable now, I wonder what it will look like after a significant weight loss. Good luck...keep us posted.

NSV is non scale victory. Something good that happens that has nothing to do with the number on the scale. Examples are fitting into an article of clothing you didn't think you would be able to or using the seat belt on the plane without an extender....or tucking your legs under yourself in the chair as I noted above. Something most of us who are/were obese couldn't do.

Obviously we're not doctors but I agree with you that the information on this site from other bandsters goes a long way in helping and supporting. I too found more help here in terms of what to expect than anything I 'learned' at my surgeon's office. Welcome to the site and hopefully we can help you in your journey.

With all due respect, you are more in need of help than he is. You know this is a really bad situation and after reading these posts, I see that your concern over being alone is clouding your judgement. You know you have to dump him and yet you are procrastinating. I know you...I know you well. You are me. I was in a bad bad marriage with husband #2. I kept saying that he needed me so I stayed. He didn't need me. I needed him. And I stayed way too long. The best thing I did after leaving him was to not be in another relationship for many years. Only after much therapy was I able to make the right decisions. I am now in a healthy relationship and there's no comparison after knowing what it's like to be with someone for all the wrong reasons. Please, please....make him go away and then work on fixing you. Focus on yourself and your children and realize that you are worthy of only the best.

So....my feet went from an 8 1/2 wide to a 7 regular. My mons...looks like a pillow. It's very puffy but that's likely because I have excess skin in the tummy area. I've pulled the whole thing up to see what a TT would look like and of course I can see a difference. I don't however, think this impacts the internal structure of the vagina. I've had children so I suspect I'm not terribly 'tight' due to that reason. I also can say with great assurance that I've never had a man complain about this...or much else either when it comes to lady parts.

Well....all I can say to the above from @@Dr-Patient is that I consider myself an equal to any man in terms of opportunity and am grateful to not be financially beholding to a husband or anyone else for that matter. Economic independence makes it possible for women to have options and that's always a good thing. It does not mean however, that I don't appreciate a gentleman. I like having a door held open for me, or the man to walk on the curb side of me so as to keep me 'safe'. Or the thousand and one ways a man can be a gentleman. One thing has nothing to do with the other. I personally think that people just don't know how to be polite anymore. And that's what's sad.

My darling girl...I lost my husband 21 years ago. When I say I know what you are going through, I mean it. I know you don't care. Nothing matters right now. Yes...sleep is very elusive. It's so hard to process how someone so important in your life can simply be no more. Even with family support, think about going to a grief support group or even seeing a therapist. I know what I'm talking about...truly. You'll never get past or get over this loss. There is no such thing as closure. You'll have to find that place of acceptance for you to know that you can live with this loss. That's the key. It's not easy to do. I can't speak to the loss of a child or a parent. I'm fortunate enough to have not had that type of loss. But spouses...yes. That I can speak to. Feel free to PM me if you would like. I would also be more than happy to talk to you as well if you would like. Just let me know. Sending you hugs. Liz

Oh Lisa..... It never ends, hon. Hope you feel better soon and hope Ken's car also gets better soon.

I think we've scared Jangy off. Poor girl....just not ready to hear all of this I suspect. I hope I'm wrong.....

Should not have been sipping coffee while reading this. Nearly choked 'cause I started to guffaw...

Roadtrip to Bandista's house!!