DeLarla

Hey, you said DeLarla again! But I'm not feelin' the love, Don... where ya been, Sugar Pop?

Nope, still not healed from my port removal. It could take months before any doctor would even consider putting in a new port. All three surgeons agreed that I can't have a port till the area is back to pre-band. My problem is called a "Seroma." It's hard to explain, but it occurs when a foreign object is removed from the body and leaves a big empty space - a gap. And the empty cavity filles with serous Fluid. The fluid wants to drain. It usually drains for awhile, then the the rest is absorbed by the body eventually. I'm just waiting for the thing to stop draining from the incision and start doing the internal thing. Then it will probably be a couple more months. But fills worry me. I agree with Letha that I need to do this thing as if I have a band - because I DO have a band! Because even with people who get really tight fills, they can still eat too much and stretch their pouch. I'm quite sure I stretched mine because I haven't been eating tiny amounts of food. But I started today on the right track. I had a yummy lunch prepared but I gave it a second thought and actually dumped it in the trash. Then I got a tiny baby food container and filled it with tuna salad, grabbed some baby carrots and celery and that's what I'll have for lunch. Gotta always remember to eat like a baby. Tiny plates, tiny tiny tiny. So at least I have my head in the right direction. If I can make it through one day, I'll be back on track. My Bandaversary will be 4 months on September 5. From now on, I'm only posting my weight on the 5th of each month. This posting every day or every week is too upsy downsy for me, so I hope I can lose a pound or 2 by then to give me new hope!

Betty, you're funny because I'm trying to downplay the whole Harley Girl thing. I laugh at our friend, Chuck, all the time. He's 60 years old. One day out of the blue he rode up on a brand new Harley - huge. One of those touring bikes. A month later he showed up on the bike wearing leather pants, leather vest with tons of patches, Harley hat, huge Harley belt buckle, Harley boots. I call him Harley Barbie. I think he looks like an idiot but I love him anyway! Sorry, but this one got me cracking up. The bike is fun, and we did get a few patches for a purse and a welding cap, but I don't want to be a biker mamma! Chris even tried doing weird things to the beard he's trying to grow. I told him that if I wanted to marry a biker, I would have married a bad ass dude with tons of money! I don't like driving the bike because my fingers go numb (carpal tunnel) but I'm doing it to stand up for all women across the country - gotta teach men a lesson for all womenkind! He thought he bought himself a $30,000 toy. B.S. I gotta fight fire with fire, and it gives him grey hair every time I get on that bike. As soon as I'm licensed, I'll disappear for hours at a time. I'll probably just go to a friend's house and park it in the garage, but I'll tell him I took it to the mountains or something. He will NOT win this game! I can't do the weekly weigh-in challenge. Too frustrating. I gained all my weight back that I lot in August, which means if I gain even one pound tonight, I'll have gained weight in August. I got up, walked my dogs, made my shake, had some extra water and measured out a tiny little tuna lunch. My portion control has gotten way out of hand along with my drinking. I obsess over everything, so I've even exercised more than normal. Now I don't want anyone blaming my weight gain on muscle, cuz I haven't beefed up too much. Problem is I'm a compulsive overeater. The band alone isn't doing the trick for me, so I have lots of extra brain-struggling to deal with. It's all in my head. My big, fat, stubborn head!

So much for my band rejecting chocolate. Suddenly it's wide open and I'm eating like I did pre-band. I put all the weight on that I lost in August. All 8 pounds. Boy, this sure isn't as easy as it was when I first got the band. Why can't the good things last?

I'm a picture taking fool! I'll post tons of pics. I'm not worried about today, but I am worried that I lost all restriction. I hope it's like it's been in the past where suddenly it comes back. I want my darn restriction back, but I'm afraid I may have stretched my pouchy. Poop.

Michelle, thanks for keeping this going. Maybe it will help for me to put this in writing since I was going to keep it a secret. But I had an OUT OF CONTROL weekend... actually, every weekend this summer was out of control. I'll take this weekly challenge and only weigh on Mondays. My fifty pound loss has gone with the wind. I'm up many pounds today. See stats. I'm gonna stick with this weekly Monday weigh in. Maybe it will make me shape up on the weekends, which are my big problem. Today 268

I'm thinking of going to AA meetings. I don't want to, but my party life has gotten out of control. I don't think I'm an alcoholic, but once I have one drink, I end up staying up drinking till 2:00 a.m. Not good. I had a 50 pound weight loss but have gained some back. I'm too tired to deal with it tonight, but maybe I'll start hitting an AA meeting just for sport. I love my nightlife, going to clubs, dancing, bands, but there's always drinking. Where are those dry clubs?

My head hunger is in full swing and is trying to convince me that I don't have a band. Need to find those tiny bites and slow chewing cuz I'm not sure where it went. Gaining.

Why am I having such mental issues with food? Last night I ate my biggest meal since being banded. I hurt my pouch - probably all stretched out now. But the second I got home I grabbed the mutts & took them for an hour walk, a far away walk. I walked so hard and fast that my feet hurt, but I woke up with my pouch still hurting. I skipped my morning shake & downed tons of water & a diet tea. I just ate 1 egg, 2 sausage and palmful of nuts. I wish I could afford a full time, live in babysitter to watch me when I eat.

Thanks Guys! Darcy, your fill is grossing me out too, but only because I'm jealous! I screwed up on the weekly weigh-in challenge and got on the damn scale again. Up 2 pounds from yesterday. Fatty fatty two by four, can't fit through the kitchen door. Oh well, still laughing. I can always weigh 12 or 19 more times tonight and hope the scale changes it mind!

If the "sorry about your loss" get the vote, please don't order one for me. I agree that it sounds like death. Good point - purple probably won't show up on black, but with a statement like BIG FAT LOSER, maybe it's better to do the mystery thing that makes people do a 2nd look. Maybe do the writing, Big "FAT" Loser?

Ports do not rock my world, that's for sure! Maybe I'm actually better off than the ported. If and when I do get a new port, maybe it will be easier to install on a smaller model! Not having a port might be a good thing after all.

My guardian angels get bored riding next to me. They flap their wings yelling, "for goodness sake, get the damn thing outta 2nd already!" Soon, very soon.

And by the way, Creme Brulee is my favorite food on the entire planet... just doesn't get any better as far as I'm concerned.

I want jewelry, sandals, a leather hand bag, a cool hat, wind chimes, a tapestry, sunglasses... Penni, I want it ALL! But don't worry about me, just eat yourself sick like I just did. I just sabotaged myself by overstuffing my lil pouchy. Not sure what got into me, but it always seems to happen when I have good success. Have fun, ya Mon!

I don't think I'll win this competition because my body loves a good plateau. I can't imagine in my wildest dreams losing any more than 50 pounds, so you've got plenty of time to win. What do I want from Jamaica? Hmm, let me think. OH, I want you to enjoy yourself by edulging in all the island's delicacies. Eat as much fried food as you can, lots of chocolate dipped macadamia candies, Jamaica Almond Fudge cakes... Drink way too many Pina Coladas with EXTRA whip cream. Take some time off from movement and lay around the beach - take advantage of waitresses, butlers and maids and just lay around like a potato snapping your fingers for extra butter. And whatever you do, don't drink any water, only thick, creamy, blended booze.

Rica, you made a good point. My little brother's best friend has always been like another brother to me. I saw him last week and he didn't notice my weight loss. So I said, "Adrian, I've lost 49 pounds and you haven't said anything." He just looked at me so innocently and said, "sis, I never though you were fat." Maybe all my friends and co-workers are just being really nice. Maybe they instinctively know that I have an aversion to compliments. Maybe it's a good thing they don't say anything!

My husband says having sex with a skinny woman is like making love to a bag of antlers. Teresa, I'm feelin' ya! Everything used to just sink into the fat. I used to stand up and my butt would get stuck in my lawn chair and the chair would come up with me. Now I don't need to brace my hands on the chair to keep it on the ground when I stand up.

Just think, Teresa... I've been with Chris 13 years. So in 3 more years your husband should surprise you with a brand new $30,000 Harley Davidson, and then blame YOU when the rent is late. I'm feelin' your pain sister, ouch, ouch, ouch. There are some good men out there. Not many, but a few.

Maybe if you keep rubbing your port a genie will pop out and grant you a wish.

Funny little band. I used to eat candy bars like they were ice cubes. I actually threw chocolate in the trash yesterday. Silly band.

I did the same thing as Donali when I was a kid. I was obsessed with Tabitha on Bewitched. When nobody was watching, I tried wiggling my nose to make things move. Then I realized I'd have to concentrate harder than Tabitha. I gave it my all, but nothing moved. I figured I'd get my powers as I got older. I'm still waiting. I also got on my hands and knees and tried walking through the kitchen cupboards without opening them. There used to be this Chuck Wagon Dog food commercial. A sheepdog would chase this chuck wagon filled with beef through the house, but it would disappear into the cupboard, so he'd bark at the cupboard. I figured it would work for me, but I just banged my head up pretty bad. What's funny is that my sister and I used to have séances before our mom even introduced us to that "other" world. So we had THE SHINING (lots of laughing please) before we were wise enough to know that we had a choice whether to believe or not to believe. Then our mom raised us on this author named Edgar Casey, who was totally into all the metaphysical stuff. Spoon bending, mind reading, telepathic communications, etc. I don't even believe in most of that stuff, but enough stuff has happened to me that I don't mess with witchcraft cause I don't want to turn my boss into a pig, because I really like pigs and then I'd want to keep him for a pet, and let's just not go there. Then again, my mom believes in vampires and UFOs. Gee, I wonder what happened to DeLarla to screw her up so bad? Go hide in a corner and eat, little girl... run!

Hey skeptics, my husband held his mom's hand on her deathbed. She was in and out of consciousness but waiting for both her boys to be there before she passed. While Chris held her hand, she told him she'd already been to the other side. He asked if she saw Gramma and their other deceased family, but his mom said, "no, there's nobody there." So maybe there is nothing. I think you gotta be really twisted to realize I just got you skeptics no matter which way you look at it! A ghost told me there's nothing! All in fun though, all in fun.

Vera, I forgot to breathe when I read that. Wow. And have we mentioned how adorable your picture is?

I'm going to try to take an exact spot shot like Bright did and see if I can tell the difference. Maybe it's all came off my butt? Maybe I should walk into the room backwards? My last Harley went really well. I got balls enough to go all the way around the block a few times (just in my sub-division.) I pulled over to let all cars pass since I'm not ready to face other vehicles yet. But I had been stopping in front of our house to let Chris pull it into the garage and turn off all the controls cause I was too afraid to let go of the clutch, brakes or handlebars. But Sunday, I made the right turn into my driveway, drove up the little hill, stopped on a dime in the garage, turned off the engine, kicked down the kickstand and dismounted. Chris watched me with one of those "holy %#@$%@" looks on his face, then one of those, "I'm impressed" nods. I had half the neighborhood cheering me on, watching me drive up and down. I was yelling out the side of my mouth, "please don't LOOK at me" the first few times, but now I honk and hoot at them - yup, I'm all that!