Oh, sweet girl, please take care of yourself. I'm not trying to pile on, but please consider reaching out to a counselor or a therapist to help you with all of your many challenges. While I'm sure your daughter is quite mature for her age, she still needs a mom who is strong and centered. Therapy isn't a failure, it's a way to have another grown up to help you work through the stresses and help find ways to cope with each and how to exercise the bad ones (namely the memory of your father and husband) and find a way to be more self-confident. Once you are self-confident inside, it will show outside which will draw people closer to you. This will be when the "right" guy shows up because what you project will be what you bring back to you. Remember, what you put out will come back to you 10-fold. I believe in prayer, and I think you're very smart to put your problems in God's hands, but please remember, the Lord helps those who help themselves, and he's put angels in our paths. Some of those angels look like doctors, others therapists. Please take advantage of all that is available to take the best care of you.
