nikkitalea89

yes! I lost a shoe size was an 8 now a 7, 7.5

it's really comforting to know that I'm not alone thanks guys..

hello all - hope everyone is doing well..

I had my surgery on the Friday of last week so it's been a week now and I'm recovering fairly well.. I'm not on any pain killers except panadol, and I'm not feeling too much pain apart from a dull ache at times.

I seemed to be doing so well until today when I started to 'freak out' about what I'd done.. I am craving real food like mad and I feel so scared that I'm never going to be able to feel satisfied again, due to only being able to eat a little of everything.. I was an emotional and boredom eater - I don't know what to do with myself now that I can't snack. I am soooo sick of liquids - its driving me mental. I feel sad because I never wanted to sacrifice my happiness for the sake of being thinner, if that makes sense? I believe that food in large quantities made me happy, and now I have no idea what to do instead. My partner is extremely supportive - it just feels really really personal and I'm struggling to get words out about how much I miss food. I refused to weigh myself until yesterday; I didn't quite believe the surgery had worked - but I am 7 kilos (about 4 pounds) down already - quite a shock to the system..

anyway - I just felt like I needed to vent a bit. thanks for listening

thanks for the welcome messages, guys <3

Perth is a quite a small town, yet people from Perth are just about everywhere!

Hello there,

My name is Nikkita and I'm 22 years old. I live in Perth, Western Australia.

I recently discovered this forum and spent a few days absorbing it, in total awe. I am fascinated that people out there feel exactly as I do, and I'm not alone.

I have been obese for over 4 years now, due to chronic PCOS. It affects my life in the most awful way. I am having WLS, (vertical sleeve) in or around October. Here, I am waiting on my Health Insurance to cover me, and I still have to come up with the remaining balance of - $3000 - my fiance and I have paid almost half already!

I havent ever really spoken about being overweight, to others - only my close friend and fiance know how I really feel, most of the time.

Its hard for me to open up about how much it really affects my life. I cannot wait until I have a date; I should find out on the 8th of September.

I am so touched, that there is a place for me to talk about how I really feel.. I sound silly, but I have always felt that weight gain is my own fault, and I should suffer it.

I can feel myself opening up, and I actually feel very vulnerable posting this.

I am a smoker, and I plan to completely ditch the fags after my last pack - only four left now.

I have given up so many things due to my size - my dream of becoming a Teacher is on hold for now, as I am struggling to hold down a part time job in order to pay for my surgery - standing for over 8 hours a day at 130 kilos is no easy feat. Most days I want to quit on the spot.

I am currently :

HEIGHT - 163 cms

WEIGHT - 130 kilos or 286 pounds.

Thanks for listening,

:heart: