Grateful_Love

I'm in Erie. So I'm as NORTH west as it can get. But there's two of us on the west side at least

Robin, I have my last supervised diet visit on 2/5/15. Then they will send everything in for approval. My doc seems to think there will be no hang ups. A girlfriend is going through the process with me and actually gained 9 lbs for this month of diet doc. I feel so so bad for her because it's almost a certainty that she'll have to start back at the very beginning and we are almost done. All I want to do is take her to a lunch buffet and tell her that she's beautiful. It's so odd how ingrained food is to our success and failure. It's really hard for me to get back on the wagon in practice. In theory I can say I'm just gonna take one step at a time and plan to do better tomorrow and blah blah blah. But the first few days it always feels like punishment. I'm excited to start therapy next week because it's going to be even more difficult after surgery. Intellectually, I know the shoulds and shouldnts and always have. In theory I could be a beach babe. In practice,however.... One day at a time. Hopefully I get myself back together. The idea of doing shakes before my actual pre op liquid diet was like a test to see how quickly id fail...with the intention of failing. So I'm gonna drop the notion of "only shakes" til the doctor says only shakes. It's just better that way. Thanks for all the support guys. <3

This is good info. Thanks guys. I'll look into it as well.

Oh gosh. This is what I'm scared of. . I have one more month of diet documentation and then I should hear back from insurance in the next few weeks or so and then schedule. I'm so nervous because I've been nothing but positive for most of this time and now that I'm like six weeks til scheduling the surgery I'm getting cold feet. Anyone else have any horror stories? How long should I ask for off work? How long did it take everyone before they felt "normal" ? How do you know when you are completely healed inside?

I have my last diet doc (6th one) on feb 5th. That's 21 days from now. I'm hopeful to lose 15lbs. The doc said to do shakes for "a while" to get used to them before the real pre op liver reduction diet. So..here's for hoping. I'm with you girl! I hope that it all came together for you.

Lol, that sounds like a great idea. Although, I'm afraid they're going to think I'm on drugs once I start losing. I fear they'll stage an intervention lol

Yay!! Congrats!!

Today was my 5th diet doc of 6. I haven't gained any in the 5 months but my surgeon told me he'd like to see another 10 pounds for next month. 10 POUNDS?! I've averaged like 5 each month. He told me to eat a Protein packed Breakfast and then supplement 2 shakes a day. I'm going to do it, but I'm going to do it kicking and screaming because it's not even my pre-surgery diet! So I'll probably have to do it for another two weeks after that, at least. Maybe even longer. We can do it tho. Imagine all those cute jeans we'll fit.

This is so funny! I'm glad you made it. I had my diet doc 5 today and I was so terrified that id gained from Christmas and just the lack of movement because it's winter and I don't wanna be out and running around or exercising in the snow lol. I didn't gain anything (thank the gods) but I also hadn't lost any really. It was terrifying because I'm so close to the end. I did low carb and I upped my Water and exercised twice instead if once a day and I got through it and I lost 5 pounds. And here I thought I was the only one who got bamboozled because of the holidays! Good luck!! You can do it. And sooner than you think it'll be surgery day. Just try not to sabotage. That's one of my new resolutions. "Don't sabotage good things, damn it" is posted on my fridge lol

Hey everyone. I've been mostly a lurker with some posts here and there. Today I had my final nutrition class (my center requires two full classes) and six months of diet docs. I have two more months to go. Today made it so real, it's like--unbelievable. It's scary. I've been super attentive/borderline obsessive with the reading and the lurking here and the YouTube-ing. And none of it made it feel as real as today. I'm terrified! I've had many food funerals and I have to really beat the poundage I gained over Christmas in order to get below my weight from last month. It's only 5 pounds but it's still making me really work. (And before I get the whole spiel about over-indulging and not sticking to my plan and yadda yadda--I already know and I don't need the lecture, lol) Now let's just pray (and taebo and taebo some more) that I get through these two months and get passed the insurance approval. I guess I just wanted to share with you all how incredibly surreal it feels for me. Did any of you guys have that feeling? Like "wow, it's really happening!" Or the like? How oh howwww am I gonna make my patience stretch for two more months!? I want to stay this motivated and excited until then and I get super flustered when I feel like it's taking too long. Anyone else close to this stage of their journey? Let's be pals

Thanks Maggie. I'm hoping that it's quick and painless (or as little pain as possible I guess). I'm hoping that I can recover quickly, not lose too much of my already thin hair, and can fit into some smaller pants that I've bad in my closet for 15 years or more lol

You're right ann, I agree. Which is why I have opted not to tell anyone anything lol. My body, my health, my reasons. I'm hoping I can skate by my supervisor with a "stomach surgery" or something discreet when I ask for time off. Otherwise--I just don't feel like it. I feel like people will get worried about me and my shrinking, but I'll deal with that as it comes lol

You look so happy!!

I hope that everyone who has had their surgeries is doing well!! Thinking of you guys. You're gonna look great on the losers bench I bet

Thanks all and I'm sorry for hijacking the original posters post. My last diet doc is in February. So I haven't had anyone say anything YET. Except a few people who told me to "live a little! It's Christmas!" My next weigh in is this Wednesday. EEEK Christmas Cookies, sure enough, crept in a little. AND I'm bloated because of my dear monthly visitor. Maybe I'm anticipating too much criticism from work peeps. Generally, I'm the office pep-talker and I don't have any enemies at all. I just work with a bunch of 20 something's (I'm 29), and they are all so--invincible in their youth or something. I swear I went from 21 to 35 somehow. Lol. I'm really mostly worried about my I -laws. I feel like I just don't have to tell anyone at work except my supervisor who is great, but IS kind of gossipy but she sort of has to be. I figure, I might as well not tell Anyone at all til I know I'm approved and it's scheduled. By then, there won't be time for talking about the (thousands) of alternatives everyone thinks will work if I just "try really hard" and "put my mind to it" But seriously--last thing--I'm practicing everything now so it's not such an adjustment. And omg, not drinking for 30 minutes before and after meals--hardest thing ever. I gave up cigarettes AND caffiene way easier lol. I hope everyone has a great day! We got super super snowed in and iced over today--so my cardio will be a breeze--I just have to shovel lol.

Red--some people really do suck. One time in the early years of dating my husband and one of the few times I had met his parents at the time, I got reamed out for going to the local humane society and handling puppies because "you have no idea what kind of germs they could have!!" His parents have very large expensive full bred dogs, and my father in law took it personally, as if I INTENTIONALLY tried to bring germs in. The stories I could tell, lol It is a complete insensitivity. Always always always watch what I eat when over for family dinners because I'm terrified if I grab a cookie they are going to lecture me about my weight. They have good intentions but have absolutely no idea how soul crushing it can be to feel under scrutiny all of the time. So I eat like a bird and cry to my husband (who is also in process for surgery, but is way less emotional than I am about everything, lol) And the peeps at work aren't insensitive, I think they are really just misinformed. I haven't even given them a chance to be supportive tho because I'm terrified that they won't recieve it well so I just don't tell them anything. And then I'm going on "vacation" ugh. I feel like such a snake about it

Lol@ the tequila. I'm worried about this conversation with others, too. My husband and one close friend are the only people who know. My mother in law is ALWAYS talking about when I'm going to have a baby. (I'm not against having kids, but I've been trying for years and it seems I just--can't. My doctor suggested this as a tool to help with conception.) I too have cut out caffeine and that has her wondering. I also quit smoking, which makes it even worse. But I'm terrified to tell her about surgery because of the "easy way out" mindset. People at work haven't really noticed any of the caffeine quitting and the not smoking, but in a few months when I just...drop weight dramatically I'm afraid they are going to think I became a drug addict. I'm not comfortable telling anyone at work because I work with people in mental health crisis situations and it seems that so many people that have had surgery and also deal with our county's crisis services have either failed miserably and can't get back on track or have become sickly in someway. I don't wanna hear the "but don't you remember what happened to so and so?"...so..I guess I'm just going to tell them I started watching portions and exercising religiously. ..I just hope I don't get sick and have to take any more time for complications or anything. It seems way easier said than done when it comes to "just be honest." I want to be honest with everyone and shout it from the roof tops but I don't want to hear the negative comments in the very beginning when I'm not fully adjusted and everyone will think "you did this to yourself" or "you knew what you were in for" or whatever. It'll all work out, for all of us, I hope!

Girl, let's just take a moment to shout out to that SKIRT! You are definitely showing it it's very best day! Those curves are fabulous!!

Wow!! Congrats girl! You look like a whole new person! Have you moved into maintenance? What does maintenance look like for you?

Tshine, I'm the same way. I've got my husband on board and he's going through the whole process with me. Sometimes I get so nervous that something will happen to HIM in the operating room and it makes me so scared. Like..complications on my side don't scare me as much as thinking that something may happen to him because of MY bright idea, ya know? The closer it gets the more excited I get. But the closer I get the more and more and more I think about scary parts. A year ago, I wouldn't have had a second thought. I knew I wanted a bypass and I knew as soon as I had insurance that would pay I would start the process and that would be that. Now i feel like I'm almost TOO informed lol. Positive thoughts. This IS a good decision and I know that it will be okay! For you! And me! And my hubs. . Keep the faith, girl

Thank you sandy. I'll keep truckin' on through. How are you feeling today? How does "reality" feel after a week post op? Is it as easy or as hard as you thought?

It's so hard coming to a conclusion. My husband and I are doing this together. I'll jade whatever surgery I choose first, and then he'll follow suit a few weeks later. He is set on sleeve. I have a friend who has a little more to lose than I do. (I would like to lose about 120-140). She has also chosen sleeve and will be having her surgery a little before mine. No dates are actually set for anyone at this point, but it was like a little pact for all three of us. I'm still so torn. I keep leaning toward bypass, and my surgeon says "you would not be wrong if that is your choice, but you would also not be wrong to choose sleeve,". He is from Pakistan and has a quirky way of saying things. He is pushing for sleeve but, again, I keep leaning toward bypass. It's so hard to make a decision! I'm scared that somehow, I'll be the rule and I'll have every complication known to man, or I'll be the rule and it just won't "work"

I'm still pre-op, and today I ate "normal." I've been dieting and watching portions and supplementing one meal with a shake each day, otherwise. But today I ate "normal" and I just felt so guilty. Not worth it. I keep having these dumb "food funerals." It's irritating because I KNOW better. But try telling my willpower that when it's faced with stuffing and gravy. If it makes you feel any better at all, I'm grieving my food-friend already and I haven't even had surgery yet. And my husband is going through ore-op, too and it's like a cake walk to him. Even more frustrating! Good luck everyone! We will get through this

I'm in the middle of my pre op work up. My next weigh in will be number 4 of 6. I go between "omg this is taking sooo long" to "omg, is this seriously happening? Am I really doing this?!" It's a little unnerving. And I feel like I just obsess and obsess. I struggle with anxiety at times too and I've always been pretty high strung, but oh my dear sweet lord, I've never contemplated one thing so much in my life!! Good luck! It's gotta be so exciting!