I had a conversation with my cousin last night and she said something very strange to me.... "Bren, don't change who you are when you are thin." I thought... what an odd thing to have someone say to you. So we discussed it and I understood what she meant more.
She said, some people trade one addiction for another...
Then she talked about a friend of her's whose sister would become indignant if someone mentioned how great she looked after losing weight.
Then you have the ones who become better than everyone else
And worse yet, the floozies, who don't know how to handle attention without doing it on their backs.
And lasty, I read a post about someone who was sick of people asking how much weight they had lost, on this here weight loss forum... and all the comments that followed. And it made me think of the bigger picture.
The truth is, we live in a world that is obsessed by a persons physical appearance, and the amount of pure hate and prejudice heaped on people who are fat is immeasurable. I myself live in a ridiculously prejudice part of the country. Cowboys with stickers on their trucks of a boy pissing on fat chicks. You name it. The ridicule is endless. Getting jobs, being taken seriously by doctors, even enjoying a night out with a meal has been difficult. I've endured so much hate in my life.
But now as with then I prefer to take the high road. My surgery and my weight loss haven't been advertised. But if people notice and say something to me, I am certainly not going to take offense. Rather it is an opportunity to educate people in some fashion or another. To connect with people. If people notice and ask questions, you don't have to be a nasty person. Because the first person you should be doing this for is YOURSELF! It's not anyone's business if I lose or don't lose, but they will notice, and they will ask. Being honest with even strangers can change their way of thinking.
How many times has someone asked you... "How are you?". How many times do you think they really meant it to hear the real answer? Many years ago I started giving people the TRUTH! And I never ask that question unless I am prepared for the real answer. I don't want to hear... "We're fine". I want to hear... how you REALLY are! Maybe it makes your life too personal to the world, but you cannot imagine the effects you can have on other people with your honesty.
Most people are good natured and when they ask a question they may well be facing their own battle and want to connect. Our world has become far too seperate. We don't care about our own neighbors. We have to start caring again. I don't want to stand in the middle of a crowd and feel completely alone any longer. If you ask me about my weight loss, I am going to tell you, and I'm going to ask you a question about your life, and maybe... we'll help one another.
Just be who you are... no matter what body fits around it.
I've heard people say time and time again: Enjoy your 20s... Everything goes down hill from there (body wise). When people think of back when they were in their 20s most think of their smokin' hot bodies, stamina, and their joints not popping all the time. I'm 23 going on 85... I started off my 20s at 5'5" and 270 pounds with a fat rear, thunder thighs, and working on a triple chin. Every joint in my body screamed as I moved. I would hyperventilate when I tried to run. At the age of 22, I had my gallbladder removed. My life as a butterball was really starting to show massive signs of stress on my body. I have more stretch marks than Octomom and am really surprised/relieved that I didn't get diabetes.
My life is beginning to change. I'm losing weight and I can breath. I can fit in a roller coaster and I don't have to touch anyone I sit next to involuntarily (ass spilling over to the next seat where someone else happens to be sitting).
As I shrink, my skin refuses to join the crusade. As one blogger put it, I look great in clothes but horrible naked. I am one of those people that as they gained weight they gained it everywhere. My once thunder thighs have become empty potatoe sacks. My floppy/fatty boobies have become tube socks with a rock in them. My plump santa gut now looks like a melted and scarred up smiley face. Don't even get me started about my ass... To give you an idea of how many inches it took for me to look so pathetic here you go:
Inches lost
6in off chest
7in off stomache
8.25in off ass
4in off each thigh
Going back to where I started... They say the 20s are the best years of your life. I say screw it! I've never been much of a conformist anyway... I'm going to make my thirties the best years of my life. By my thirties, I'll lose all of the rest of my weight and get a nip/tuck or two.... or eight (we'll see what happens). By my thirties, I'll start popping out pups, have a stable career, and become less of a closet nudist and more of a streaker. Rawr...
