Bitch and moan.

I've been indulging in treats of the sweets & booze variety. Plus I've not worked with my trainer for 2 weeks. I had a stupidly huge meal the day after Christmas. The only saving grace was that it was pretty much the only thing I eat that day.

Im actually a bit depressed how easily I have slipped back to my former self. It has been almost a year of changing food habits and trying to create exercise habits and nothing stuck. It is so not true about doing something for a certain amount of time (3 weeks, 3 months ???) and it becomes a (new) habit. I am very fearful that this will be like other attempts. It is only a matter of time before the weight comes back, plus more.

Maybe I should have had my damn stomach stapled.

PS I have also developed a F*%&ing hemorrhoid!!! WONDERFUL

I know how you feel... It is very hard and how do you stop going back to your same old ways.. it is very very hard.. i am alot like you are doing now. When you taste the food you have been without you want it even more..

I'm always so torn over whether or not to respond to a post like this. It's not that I don't know what to say, it's just that, I think that some things require a person going through it on their own before they actually "get it." But, just in case I can save you some heartbreak, I'll give it a try.

DO NOT undo all of your hard work. Believe me, I know. I lost 71lbs on Weight Watchers, and swore that I was "fixed." Oh, I just knew that my days of scarfing everything in sight were long gone. About the time that I started to believe my own B.S, was when my eating disorder snuck back up on me and kicked my ass. I gained all of that weight plus, right back. I gained 60lbs. in a year! I spent years beating myself up. I would have given anything if I would have just done things differently, and I sure as hell wouldn't have believed that anything positive would come out of that experience, but I was wrong. The positive aspect of that was that I found out that I'm way stronger than I though I was, but more importantly I realized that I will NEVER forget who I am and where I came from. Don't you forget either. This is a lifelong journey. Do you think you're going to make a journey of that magnitude without any bumps in the road? This is a little bump, don't let it turn into an endless pit. GET UP! Stop that behavior and do what you need to do. Think about it; I don't know you, and yet your success means enough to me to write you this lenghty reply. You can do this.

I just want to say thanks!! It really helps coming from someone who knows how it feels and has been there and done that.It is very hard at times. going through this process. Thanks again

My story is up there with yours or maybe worse. Check this out... I had my surgery on April 27, 2007, a day before my B-day, Whoo Hoo, right. You know when they tell you to do the liquid diet before surgery. Well I just couldn't make myself follow any diet and I don't know why. Anyway, I didn't lose anything before my surgery. My doctor checked my BMI and said he could go on with the surgery, Yippeee!. Well, anyway, all went well and I tried my best to follow the food instructions. Guess what? For a whole year I LOST NOTHING! NOT ONE POUND! I was eating less, so why hadn't I lost anything. Who knows. Anyway, even though I didn't lose a pound, I didn't gain anything, Whoopee, right? Wrong! About two months shy of a year. I started gaining weight. Of course, by this time, I thought I was invinsible. I ate whatever I wanted and thought I wouldn't gain anything. Boy was I wrong. I gained about 20 pounds which put me at a higher weight than when I first had my surgery, eeeekkk! I couldn't be more disgusted and depressed. I too, didn't want to go back to my doctor with this weight gain. My co-worker finally convinced me to just go back and get a fill, which I should have gotten when I first saw the signs of eating more than I should. Anyway, I went to get another fill and that did the trick. I started losing weight immediately. I've lost about 41 pounds so far (10 months). I can tell you that I am still losing weight, but slowly. I guess I can get my lazy behind into a gym or start walking again because it did help. Anyway, we are both struggling, so you're not by yourself. It will take some time and I know and you know we can work this band, girl. Get back on track. It's the only way to go. Good luck and Happy New Year.

- Beverly

Los Angeles, CA

Yep Im done whining. I'm just a lazy person at heart and really need to be motivated. It is no wonder my good habits are having a hard time sticking. I haven't let go of the bad ones yet. But I'm working on it, again.

Thanks for taking the time to read and comment.