Tough day

You know, I thought I had thoroughly researched this lap band thing. Somewhere in all the excitment I got a little mixed up. The post-op diet takes 5 weeks before I am back to eating whole foods not 5 days. If I can't win the battle over carbs now how am I gonna follow the post-op diet. I feel like I am carrying around alot more weight now. I didn't sleep well last night because I am reconsidering the surgery. I don't want to get the band then hurt myself by cheating, vomiting. So with the lack of sleep last night I managed to get up late and missed breakfast before class. Then discovered today was the day my teacher wanted to discuss death. Memories just came flooding back about my MIMI and how she passed when I was a teen. I was fighting tears all through class, still am. Not to mention I am hormonal because it's that time of the month. Plus I haven't had my psych meds in a week because I have been saving for the lapband. I am getting creepy and depressed feelings again. I am gonna call my doc and try to get samples to last till I get paid. Usually I would take it easy when I get these feelings but I have 2 finals wed and need to study. I wish I could just step out of these feelings and look at everything objectively but I can't without my meds. I can feel the mixed episode coming on.

I was also like you I’m also on med Lexapro and I kept telling myself not to do this I can’t live without food my things was sweets. Guess what I can live without them if I want to keep living? You will do go there will always be that fear inside us no matter what we will always ask our self why we did it! but at the end of the road the light is shinning and we will look and FEEL great. My doctor told me not to stop taking my meds until I felt good, he said we still need them so try and talk to your doctor she what she tells you. Best wishes and you are making the right decision.

My doctor didn't require a pre-op diet. And I didn't cheat...not once. I was 1 - fearful that I would hurt myself and 2 - not going through all this to fail. After the surgery you will find the strength. It is that second change you are given and most of us don't want to mess that up.