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Cruisin'

Well, we leave Monday out of Galveston on Carnival Ecstasy (do they really have to name the ship "Ecstasy?) for a 5 day cruise to Cozumel and Progreso. I am getting excited, although I am the kind of person who doesn't really get giddy until the day of the trip! I am going to eat with abandon, since this will truly be my last time to do so. Midnight chocolate buffet...here I come!   Surgery is scheduled for the 31st. at 7:30 a.m. At least I'll be the first one, so Dr. St. Dreamy will be awake and fresh. I guess I am not feeling stressed yet because the trip must come first. One thing at a time.:001_tongue:   I don't know if I will have time to post before surgery day. I will try to get online right after, though, to let others know how it went. And I am sure I will have questions and need reassurance, too!   Happy holidays to all. See you on the losers' bench!!!
renebeau

renebeau

2
 

Why? Because I can't eat normally.

As I watched my perpetually skinny husband and his daughter and her husband (probably 300 lbs each) tuck away huge amounts of food over the weekend, I started to think, maybe I should just try to eat healthier, be more active. Today I wolfed down a roast beef sandwich and curly fries like no tomorrow. I cannot do it on my own. If I do not have surgery, I will never be any thinner. Truthfully, I could continue on as I have and stay around 200 lbs. I could eat whatever I want, as much as I want. I could.   But I don't want to be a fat, old lady. I want energy for other things. I want to wear nice clothes again.   And I don't want to lose weight and then gain it all back.   So the sleeve will give me restriction. That's what I need. Just reduce the quantity of what I eat. I expect to eat carefully for the first 6 months. Lean protein first, veggies/fruit, then carbs. I imagine I will have lost most of the weight I have to lose by then. Then I will be able to allow myself more treats. But I hope to eat like all of the other skinny people eat. Small amounts of normal food, which includes some sweets and "bad" food (fast food) now and again (once I am through losing weight).   Being around super over-eaters all weekend almost lulled me into thinking I don't need this surgery. After all, neither of them thinks their weight is a problem, why should I? It sure helped to get on this site this morning to get recommitted. I AM recommitted.   VSG - here I come!
renebeau

renebeau

2
 

Surgery date - 12/31/2009

Looks like I'll be starting my new life in the new year!   Just got back from the surgeon consult. Wow, Dr. St. Laurent is a cutie! I really like how pragmatic he is. No drama, no shame...no dire warnings...   One of his helpers in his office said something I have been wanting to hear. "In a few months, it will be like you never had surgery." That's what I want. I want to just eat small amounts like skinny people do naturally. I can't wait!   He thinks I can lose all of my excess weight, since my BMI is pretty low (34). No presurgery diet. He will use a 38 French bougie since he thinks my stomach will be shorter than someone who is more obese. For very high BMI, he uses a 36, since the length of the stomach will be more. That way the VOLUME of my stomach will be correct. (I get it!)   We are taking a cruise for Xmas, seeing kids and grandbaby early the next week, then surgery. This way, I will not have to miss much work.   A new year, a new me! :ohmy:
renebeau

renebeau

2
 

Why so few posters?

I have been alternating between this site and OH's VSG message board. I noticed that there are few posts from sleevers in general, compared to the other surgeries. Why is that?   I know the sleeve is newer, and fewer people have had it. But I also think (hope) that sleevers have the fewest complications/problems, thus do not post looking for help as much. Also, perhaps sleevers don't need the constant support that bandsters do, for example, because there are fewer adjustments/changes with the sleeve.   At least, that is what I am hoping.   And if you are sleeved and just lurking...please post! We soon-to-be-sleevers have enquiring minds and want to know!   My surgeon consult is Monday morning. Man, am I excited!!!!!!:ohmy:
renebeau

renebeau

2
 

PCP is "on board" with VSG

I saw my PCP yesterday for my itchy ears (allergies) and told him I was considering WLS. He said he was on board, since it would help me with my HBP, high cholesterol and diabetes (type 1). He asked me who I was planning to use as my surgeon. Turns out, Dr. St. Laurent (my doc) was who he was going to recommend! He also agreed that the sleeve is the way to go. I feel very reassured that he was in support of my decision.   Things are looking more and more positive! Now if I can just get in to see Dr. St. Laurent!
renebeau

renebeau

1
 

can't think about anything but VSG!

Here I am at work, not working. Again. I can't focus on anything but getting VSG. I am reading all of the threads, looking at the pictures, thinking about the surgery...NOT doing my work. I was never very good at using my time wisely. There are lots of things I COULD do here, but nothing very pressing. So I just sit, perusing the website, feeling guilty.   Why am I such a procrastinator? Why do I keep putting things off? If I would just take one small task and follow it through, I know I would feel better and want to do more. I think I put off things that I am not sure of all of the steps - when I hit a small roadblock, I stop, "well, I guess I'll do that later."   And I let the negativity push me further down. My "all or nothing" view causes me to throw in the towel for the day if I start off bad.   Am I using the surgery focus to keep me from having to work? The therapist said I am feeling "HOPE". Is that why I am so drawn to the website and spend all day thinking about it? I will get all of my work done eventually. I always do. I just wish I could be more proactive...
renebeau

renebeau

3
 

I am normal.

I went back to see the LPC that my dr. uses for his bariatric patients yesterday. She thinks I should go with the sleeve. I am feeking more positive after talking with her. I think the sleeve is the right surgery for me.   My GFs are in support of me doing the surgery. My husband... not so much. I have not told him I want the sleeve - he still thinks I want the band. I am worried about him not wanting me to do it, since it is drastic and permanent. Also, with a 33 BMI, I will be self pay. We can afford it, but I know my DH would rather not spend the money (cheapskate).   The therapist, Deborah, taled to me about my inertia. I had been feeling so shameful about my "laziness" and feeling like it was a permanent character flaw, like it was all that I am. She told me she did not see me as lazy. And she's right. When it is something I want to do, I am NOT lazy. I have 2 master's degrees and am accomplished at my job. How could I do those things if I was "lazy"?   I have been internalizing my husband's values - you have to work hard, if it's too easy it's not worth it, don't pay for something you can do yourself, etc. I had to fight to get a maid, because he thinks we should do all of the stuff she does (I HATE cleaning). And by looking for my self worth from my husband, I felt like a failure, since I am not doing the things he thinks are valuable. Wow. What a revelation that was!   I have to start doing things for me. I can say that we will pay someone to landscape the yard, or paint the living room, or wash my car. He might not agree, but that doesn't mean that I can't still do those things. We don't have to agree on everything (again, what a revelation!).   And now the power in the relationship is changing. I inherited $ from my mom (died Feb. 09) which allows me to have more freedom. I am almost to the point of thinking that he can't say no to me anymore!   So I will take care of myself. I will have the surgery. YAY for ME!!!
renebeau

renebeau

3
 

leaning towards the sleeve

Hi sleevers!   I have been researching lap band for several months now, and am now considering the sleeve. I am a low BMI (currently 33) and have type 1 diabetes, hypertension, & high cholesterol.   I have seen several bandsters make the switch on lapbandtalk. I would love to hear from any of you that were going to get or actually had the band, then went with the sleeve.     It is permanent (obviously) so I want to make the most well-informed decision I can.   Thanks for your input.:ohmy:
renebeau

renebeau

1
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