I have been considering and researching the gastric band for just over a year.
I kicked the idea around a little before then but thought it was cheating. I read a lot of personal stories about people claiming to have tried everything before concluding that surgery was their last best hope but I couldn't really relate. I have never tried diet pills or amphetamines, fad diets, or weight watchers. I mainly have just struggled with balancing eating with exercise and so far have failed repeatedly.
I was one confirmation phone call away from starting down the lap band path, but at the last minute I had some doubts. 1) If I can't manage eating and exercising now, what will make me all of a sudden be able to do it after surgery? And 2) When normal people eat only a few ounces of food per sitting we call them anorexic and throw them into rehab.
The solution is simple; eat less and move more. Until last winter I honestly had never tried doing both at the same time before so I thought I'd give it one good shot before committing.
I did great for about 4 months. I stuck to my 1400 calorie worksheet from mypyramid.gov and exercised 30-45 minutes a day doing cardio and strength training. I lost 25 pounds! I was ecstatic, and thought, surely I had solved this problem.
But then, I lost my motivation... I was sick of feeling insanely hungry all the time. I was tired of having one nasty cold sore after the other. I worked out less and less, I got nutritionally permissive, and I went off the birth control pill.
I gained about 10 pounds through the summer, and thought ok, time to get back on the wagon so I started working out again though less frequently.
Then my job stress went through the roof this fall and I had to move out of my awesome apartment to a smaller, crappier one. At the same time my insurance switched my thyroid medication to generic and it doesn't work worth a shit. Even though my eating is not nearly as terrible as it used to be and I make an effort to get off the couch, I've gained almost all of it back and I feel my weight creeping up further by the minute.
I've been on the exercise hobby horse for 17 years and I can stick to it for a few months, but then I just get tired of having that consume all of my waking, non-work hours and I need a break to do social of creative stuff. I always get back to it, but the problem is that it doesn't stay off. The amount of effort required to even maintain my weight is like running up an icy hill, so I need a lot of momentum.
I'm not so conflicted anymore about the eating since my body very clearly does not need as much food as I give it--and I eat similar to my thin friends, sometimes less!
So now I'm reconsidering the band as a little helper to keep my momentum. I am having enough health consequences that they overbalance the uncomfortable side effects noted with the band. I would rather have up-chucking problems than chronic lower back problems; I would rather have heartburn than the burn in my knees if I sit with my feet under my chair; I have dents in my shoulders from the straps weighing down into the fatty tissue. I get depressed every few months which lands me on the couch, I get a rash on the back of my neck, sitting in a chair I feel all the fat in my middle pushing up around my neck and choking me, I snore and wake up frequently so I bet I have sleep apnea.
I'm frustrated and I'm scared. I'm worried I will be trading in one set of health problems for another. I am terrified of surgery and I am even afraid of success! But when it comes down to it, I am not comfortable in my own skin. It hurts to look in the mirror. I am embarrassed everywhere I go. And my body weighs on my mind EVERY single day.
I have been considering and researching the gastric band for just over a year.
I kicked the idea around a little before then but thought it was cheating. I read a lot of personal stories about people claiming to have tried everything before concluding that surgery was their last best hope but I couldn't really relate. I have never tried diet pills or amphetamines, fad diets, or weight watchers. I mainly have just struggled with balancing eating with exercise and so far have failed repeatedly.
I was one confirmation phone call away from starting down the lap band path, but at the last minute I had some doubts. 1) If I can't manage eating and exercising now, what will make me all of a sudden be able to do it after surgery? And 2) When normal people eat only a few ounces of food per sitting we call them anorexic and throw them into rehab.
The solution is simple; eat less and move more. Until last winter I honestly had never tried doing both at the same time before so I thought I'd give it one good shot before committing.
I did great for about 4 months. I stuck to my 1400 calorie worksheet from mypyramid.gov and exercised 30-45 minutes a day doing cardio and strength training. I lost 25 pounds! I was ecstatic, and thought, surely I had solved this problem.
But then, I lost my motivation... I was sick of feeling insanely hungry all the time. I was tired of having one nasty cold sore after the other. I worked out less and less, I got nutritionally permissive, and I went off the birth control pill.
I gained about 10 pounds through the summer, and thought ok, time to get back on the wagon so I started working out again though less frequently.
Then my job stress went through the roof this fall and I had to move out of my awesome apartment to a smaller, crappier one. At the same time my insurance switched my thyroid medication to generic and it doesn't work worth a shit. Even though my eating is not nearly as terrible as it used to be and I make an effort to get off the couch, I've gained almost all of it back and I feel my weight creeping up further by the minute.
I've been on the exercise hobby horse for 17 years and I can stick to it for a few months, but then I just get tired of having that consume all of my waking, non-work hours and I need a break to do social of creative stuff. I always get back to it, but the problem is that it doesn't stay off. The amount of effort required to even maintain my weight is like running up an icy hill, so I need a lot of momentum.
I'm not so conflicted anymore about the eating since my body very clearly does not need as much food as I give it--and I eat similar to my thin friends, sometimes less!
So now I'm reconsidering the band as a little helper to keep my momentum. I am having enough health consequences that they overbalance the uncomfortable side effects noted with the band. I would rather have up-chucking problems than chronic lower back problems; I would rather have heartburn than the burn in my knees if I sit with my feet under my chair; I have dents in my shoulders from the straps weighing down into the fatty tissue. I get depressed every few months which lands me on the couch, I get a rash on the back of my neck, sitting in a chair I feel all the fat in my middle pushing up around my neck and choking me, I snore and wake up frequently so I bet I have sleep apnea.
I'm frustrated and I'm scared. I'm worried I will be trading in one set of health problems for another. I am terrified of surgery and I am even afraid of success! But when it comes down to it, I am not comfortable in my own skin. It hurts to look in the mirror. I am embarrassed everywhere I go. And my body weighs on my mind EVERY single day.