i've done tons of research... on the surgery, on the surgeon. i finally narrowed it down and they called me today to set up my consultation and since i live 4 hours away they're doing all the consults in one day... on March 19th... that's like 2 WEEKS AWAY!

i asked the girl how soon after the consultation could i have the surgery and she said as soon as 3 weeks!!

holy sh!t. i don't know if i'm ready. do i have the strength do follow thru with something? can i learn to view food as fuel instead of happiness? should i try dieting one more time? can i do this on my own without spending $12,000?

i know there are SO many of you out there that probably have felt what i'm feeling right now. HOW do i know i'm making the right decision?

kris

kRIS,

YOU WILL BE OK. I HAD ALL OF THESE FEELINGS BEFORE MY SURGERY. I AM 2WKS POST OP AND I AM SO GLAD THAT I MADE THE DECISION TO BETTER MY LIFE. ONCE YOU MAKE UP YOUR MIND AND THE SURGERY IS DONE YOU WILL HAVE SUCH A WEIGHT LIFTED OFF YOUR SHOULDERS. BE STRONG AND BE HAPPY!!!

Kris, Congratulations on deciding to improve your health. I also was nervous, scared, excited and many more emotions before I had my surgery. Just make a committment to yourself and follow through. You deserve it. I am so glad I did it and it has only been 8 weeks. I am down 30 lbs and have so much more energy already. Things can only continue to get better for you. The sooner the better I say. Good luck.

I totally understand what you're saying. I am starting the process, like I did last spring, and keep having those doubts. Should I try yet another diet? Am I strong enough to make this work when I couldn't make any of my other diets work? I guess we have to take it a day at a time and figure out what is best for us in the long run.

i thought i'd feel excited and happy to get the consultations out of the way and the surgery scheduled but instead i'm bawling my eyes out and i'm so scared i'm gagging.

i don't have the support of my family or friends so i'm basically doing this alone. i've told my sister and brother and they just tell me to diet more. i've told a friend who said that $12k is so much money and i could use that for much better things. are they right?

You have to do what you feel is right for you. I guess you could always use the money to pay for an early funeral or like 1 hour of care after a stroke or heart attack. That is where I was heading and probably you as well which is why you are considering this. Sometimes we need to be selfish for our own good. Noboby walks in your shoes. You are doing the right thing. My family was not so sure at first but then they rallied around. They are very supportive. They want me to be healthy and happy. You deserve to be happy. Screw them if they can't understand. I wish you all the luck and God's Blessings

i'm just so scared because, believe it or not, bulimic at one point. i binge and purge using laxatives. what happens if i continue to binge?

Kalipso2,

You sound like you really need a hug. You are on a very dangerous road with the laxatives, bingeing, and purging. Your health can be affected in a very dangerous way. The fact that your family is not supportive does make it more difficult, but perhaps when they start seeing the results they will get with the program. You take care of you. Don't let others dictate your happiness. Be excited about the appointment. Be proud you want to change your life. Do you cosign everything your family does? I am so proud of myself for what I have done. I know that I will live longer, and be so much happier, not to mention hotter! Take care.

Kris I am very scared to I have my date set for the 19th to be banded I am having it done in mexico by Dr. Ortiz he was on Oprah just a heads up I am having my consult on the same day of my surgery. I am not sure where you live. But also in Mexico it is half the price of what you said you were paying if intrested visit Dr. Ariel Ortiz web site so many people from the us go there.

well, i'm still scared but i also still plan on going ahead with the consults. i caught a glimpse of myself at work in the mirror in the bathroom. my bloated face, the pants stretched so far across my butt, boobs so big i can't see my feet.

i'm not happy but i'm still scared.

i did think a lot about Mexico but i would have to go alone and i don't think i have that much courage.