Anyone else scared of not being successful? I have been on so many diets and lost/regained too much weight in the past. I emotionally can't take disapointing myself again. I am so nervous that I won't be able to keep it together. Does anyone else worry about not being able to drink diet coke, or drinks in general with meals? Choosing the right foods? Reducing portions?

Yes, I am very scared. I have tried so many times and let myself down, lost weight only to regain it plus more. Said "this time, it will be different" whenever I rejoined Weight Watchers. I have beat myself up about my lack of willpower and told myself that all of this discomfort that I'm feeling with my body is all my fault -- there is nobody to blame but me. But obviously that tactic hasn't worked, since here I am at my highest weight ever.

It is difficult to give myself the pep talk and tell myself that this time really will be different. It won't be easy, but I'll have a tool I never had before. I have researched this to death and I know what I have to do to make the band successful. But yes, I am definitely scared of not only disappointing myself and my husband, but wasting the money since I am self pay. I worry about dealing with all of the eating behavior changes.

Still, I am tired of waiting to live...and all we can do is try and imagine how being successful will feel. I imagine it'll feel even better that getting accepted to college, or graduating from college, or getting married -- all things I didn't think I would ever do because I have such low self-esteem.

I think that another tool for me, in addition to the band, will be getting some counseling. I will change my body with the band but I also have to change what's going on in my head and figure out why I developed these behaviors to begin with. I think that will help.

Just wanted you to know that you weren't alone -- I can't imagine anybody not being scared, unless they're really naive. We can do this!

Anyone else scared of not being successful? I have been on so many diets and lost/regained too much weight in the past. I emotionally can't take disapointing myself again. I am so nervous that I won't be able to keep it together. Does anyone else worry about not being able to drink diet coke, or drinks in general with meals? Choosing the right foods? Reducing portions?

Thanks you summarized my thoughts perfectly (including the weight watchers comment). I am glad to know I am not alone. The statistics are on our side for a positive outcome. WE CAN DO IT!

I just want some success, that will be motivation for me to keep going. I'm tired of playing with the same 5 to 20 pounds. I am too, tired of waiting to live!

Alyssa

I think you hit the nail on the head with the counseling. I to am going to under-go some counseling. I must find out why I eat the way I do. Also, I am fearful that my food addiction will turn into something else and I do not want that to happen either.

I was just driving home yesterday after eating a LARGE supper and thought can I really do this? I know we can and we will. I heard a quote from Aristotle and it goes something like this....

We are what we repeatedly do. Therefore excellence is a habit not an act. What kind of habit are you practicing today?

I am going to have this posted up everywhere I go. I love it.

:clap2:

tru dat!!! I too am scared to death of not succeeding, but you can also sabotage yourself with that kind of thinking, you must believe not only is it attainable, but that you totally deserve it!!!

I glad to know I am not the only one who is scared. I don't want to let myself down or my husdand. I am at my largest ever weight and it makes me sick. I know if I have to do something. I just worry I will not lose the weight.

Look, none of us would be getting the band if we didn't have a history of failure when it comes to losing weight. This is not something any of us are doing lightly (no pun intended!).

Yes, I'm scared. I'm especially scared because the nurse practitioner at Lahey Clinic in Burlington, MA, where I'm being banded, says that the majority of people she sees do not reach their goal. I'm determined not to be one of those people.

This is loaded for all of us here and we carry a lot of emotional baggage -- history of failure, history of beating ourselves up over our failure, history of feeling badly about ourselves.

I for one am sick of it! I deserve better than that. For once in my life, I want the issue of weight to go away. Being banded is my hope that I will be able to lose and then, maintain the loss successfully.

I don't worry about not being able to have carbonated drinks. I stopped drinking Coke and all that stuff years ago, when someone told me it's like pouring chemicals down your throat. My nemesis is portion control and food craving. And to get a handle on these, I need to remember to go back to Lahey, no matter what, and get fills, fills, fills -- if that's what it takes.

I want all of us here to be successful. We can cheer one another on.

So let's go -- rah, rah, rah!

Is everyone excercising? I think that portion control and excercise are the key to the whole thing.

My surgery date is Feb. 11th. I've chosen not to tell anyone -- except my husband, of course. I'm not telling my kids or my mother. My husband is not happy regarding my decision and is giving me a bit of a hard time about it, but hey, it's my surgery and this is what I've decided is right for me. I guess it goes back to the fear of failure. Until I know that I can really do this for sure, I don't want anyone knowing. I don't want questions, I don't want expectations. I'm hard enough on myself without having anyone else be hard on me...

bonnie

Yeah, I'm scared of failing. That's what I do best. However, I am also feeling optimistic for the first time in well over a decade so I'm hopeful!

bonnie, come to us for support. We'll be here!

Okay -- I'll take you up that. Here I am! And I'm ready for all the support you can give me. I'm very good at giving support back -- this isn't a one-way ticket to Dodge.

How are you doing on your exercise? I'm really good with exercise -- I used to be quite the athlete. If you have any questions regarding exercise or need motivation or whatever, I'm your girl.

I'd like to eat healthfully, without binging or going off of my diet, from now until my surgery date. I feel the more weight I lose, the easier the surgery will be and the better I'll feel. I'm just so sick of being FAT!

b.

i'm scared of failing, but after 40 years i'm more scared of the alternative... doing nothing and getting bigger and bigger. it takes courage to try. we have the courage. i admire all of us for doing this... you can do it too.

t

Hey bonnie! I went through about a six to eight month period about a decade ago when I was an exercise addict. And....that was that. lol I never did it before and I never did it after.

However, I'm hoping a little of that addiction transfer happens after I can't eat all the time and I can get back into the swing of things. There is a YMCA about 40 minutes from my house and I'm going to join it after I heal from the surgery. Also, I've set a very small goal for myself of at least fifteen minutes of something a day for the rest of January. It beats nothing!

bonnie, is your husband going to go with you when you have the surgery? Do your sons know you've decided to go forward with it?

Hiya Gibson Girl,

Yes, my husband will be there for me during the surgery. He's supportive of my getting the lapband, but he doesn't like the fact that I'm not telling anyone.

You know, I don't want to tell anyone, because I've failed to lose weight so many times before -- I'd rather keep my mouth shut and just let the weight loss speak for itself....

I'm getting really anxious. Yesterday, Lahey Clinic in Burlington, MA -- the place I'm having my lapband done, called. They're moving my surgery date up. I was scheduled for Feb. 11th, but am now going in on Feb. 4th. Knowing that I'm two weeks away from this makes me nervous, even though I'm absolutely going thru with it. No chickening out here!

I've been a steady exerciser for a very long time. Unfortunately, since I've gained a huge amount of weight in the last year, I've stopped being an exercise nut. I know once I get back into the swing of things I'll become an exercise nut again -- especially once I feel I can move in my body. I can help motivate you to exercise if you'd like. I'm good at that.

Glad to meet you!

b.

Hi gals...

Isn't it great to have this support system!! Oh god....I'm so scared!! And yes....I think it's fear of failure not fear of the surgery. I've had plenty of surgeries in my time. Bonnie....you have every right to NOT tell people of the surgery. I have told a SELECT few....people that I can count on to support me, not be judgemental, and help me if needed. God bless my hubby who is soooo supportive and awesome. But mostly...god bless this group!! I'm getting banded on 2/5 (Fat Tuesday) and started my pre-op diet yesterday. It's basically 3 shakes on one low carb meal a day for two weeks. Since doing my marathon in October I haven't done a LICK of exercise. Going to the gym tonight and ready to come full circle with this committment and process. I think we are all brave and courageous for taking this step and making this all important committment to our health. We can do it girls!!!

Amy

I know that everyone says the lap band is a tool and not a solution. This worries me. So much of my eating is in my head. Since I'm going to be banded in less than two weeks, how will I get the destructive thoughts about food out of my head and get on the lap band wagon? I don't want to fail at this. My biggest fear is of failure. I've failed over and over and over again on "diets," and so, it's natural that failure is the first thing that come to mind when I think about getting the lapband. Tell me how you all did it!

Thanks!

b.

I was just driving home yesterday after eating a LARGE supper and thought can I really do this?

I did this exact thing last night: ate a large meal even by my own standards, then wondered, "How in the hell am I going to do stop doing this?"

I'm not backing out by any means, but I am beginning to question whether or not I'm properly mentally prepared for the change my life is about to undertake.