May I vent for a second?,

I’m nearly two months post-op from gastric sleeve surgery. I’m now 40 pounds lighter from when I started this journey at 278 lbs. I look amazing. But in the inside I feel like $#|%. I may be one of few people who Love and Regret my decision at the same time. I finally understand what some of y’all meant when you say you have to be mentally prepared and mentally strong. BOY!!!! I miss being able to eat at my own leisure without worrying if my body will accept it...or wondering if I’ll feel horrible afterward. I thought I knew everything there was to know abt bariatric surgery...but just like a first time parent finds out, boy was I wrong. I realize that for me it’s very difficult to separate myself from my love of food. For me, it’s very comparable to a drug addiction. Of course, I can’t physically eat as much as I want/used to but I long for normalcy! I miss the old me. Am I wrong for feeling this way? I dwell on this feeling everyday. Is there anyone else who feels the same? Is this normal? Honestly, I’m starting to feel some sort of self-doubt which I know can lead me back to bad habits. But I have to be honest with myself and at least acknowledge my thoughts, feelings and actions.

I’m also struggling severely from having to cut certain people off. A few of my close family members, who are also over-weight, have started treating me differently. They constantly mention the fact that I had surgery. And say that I’ve changed...duh!!!! Ya don’t say????!? They say I’m always wanting to be seen, and the truth is that I have more energy to go out and try new things. I can now walk around the room instead of hiding in one spot for hours. They’ve since started delving deep into my personal life with the malicious intent to “discover” something else unflattering about me since weight is no longer a major concern. It hurts me deeply because my intentions currently do not align with my reality. I pictured pure happiness and laughter with my loved ones and friends...and now they’ve turned on me. I pray the good Lord blesses me with new and supportive people in my life who actually accept me as I am, as a person who wants to do better. My struggle with my loved ones make me regret my decision tremendously. I’m not sure what to do.

On 24. Oktober 2019 at 5:31 AM, BetterBelizeIt said:

My struggle with my loved ones make me regret my decision tremendously. I’m not sure what to do.

I've read your post again and I have the impression that you gained self-confidence regarding weight/food/looks?

IMO it's not the weight loss or the change in itself that causes people to react differently. People will always react differently to you if you change your behavior.

Think about when you started working, when you were a newbie. And then think about how people might have started reacted differently to you after you've had a few years of experience under your belt. They might have started to view your opinion as more trustworthy for example. And some might have started bitching because they couldn't handle the fact that you were not an inexperienced newbie anymore and maybe viewed you as threat in some sort of way.