Hi Everyone,

I am 30 years old and new to this forum. What an amazing discovery it was for me!

About a year ago I decided to have WLS. I met with my surgeon, and did all the pre surgical requirements. Due to lack of support and my own fears, I backed out in December and decided not to go through with it.

I spent a lot of time convincing myself that I made the right decision, that I didn't want to become malnourished on the other end, or develop any of the other potential complications. My mom was strongly against the surgery, constantly telling me I would just eat through the sickness and gain it all back.

Fast forward 5 months, I have gained all my losses back PLUS 10lbs and am at my heaviest. I am 5 foot 2 and 430lbs. This is not an easy pill to swallow. My joints are effected greatly by all of the weight I'm carrying. I have decided that I am going to start a new program, one that will give me better tools for how to live life after surgery, and take my time with the process. I have some emotional eating to overcome while I train my brain to live a new life.

Does anyone have any advice? How did you mentally prepare for such a big life change? And did anyone do it without much support? I refuse to let anyone tell me what's best for me anymore. I know what I need to do.

So happy to be here and hopefully make some friends and a nice support system along the way.

Happy Saturday

- Jen

Edited April 27, 20197 yr by JenCarey12

Jen, my pivotal moment came when I realized I dreaded major surgery much less than continuing as I was, sad,defeated, sitting or lyi,g down as much as possible, because it hurt to much for me to be up . Hearing that I might only live 2 years or less, knowing that even if I hadn't developed them yet I was at risk for some nasty nasty things, any one of them could do me in. Repeatedly getting infections and colds, no resistance it seems. I did not have a very good quality of life, I was 5ft 8in and 365+pounds, a nice weight for a tree but very heavy for a Human Being. And I had drug this Weight around for 72 years because I was obese even as a toddler, I was strong, athletic as a teen, but my inner strength was fading fast. Maybe I should just sit in my rocker and wait for the Death Angel to claim me?
But then I read about Bariatrics, the new lives it had given others, what would it harm to at least try?
That was 4 years ago in August, I did not have an easy time securing surgery. You see many programs have an upper age limit, 60,65,or 70. I was almost 70 when I started out and 72 years 8 months and 8 days when I received my RNY. And my recovery has not be usual, if you find any of my early postings you will see what I mean. Many twists,turns ,some quicksand I almost got swallowed up by, but I will not go back to the old existance, I am losing weight, rediscovering ME, under recostuction

I mean reconstruction, someone distracted me there. Well actually my cat Squeaky jumped up on my lap, she, her sister Cassie and my own son, that I nicknamed Tomkitten, they believed in me when the world tried to stop me, when I wasn't sure I was brave enough to go through with this, after years of being subservient to a husband's whims, I was suddenly having to stick up for ME. And I realized as things fell into place
It was the right time
For the right choice
The right person was requesting
The right surgery
For the right reasons.
If I did not do it, go through with it, would I ever have another chance? So I stood up on my shaky legs, with every bit of courage I could summon, and went forward into a brave new world. I won that challenge and I believe YOU can too! Please join me in Weight Loss, my young friend.???

Hi there I'm confused you had surgery a year ago what surgery. You gained weight after 5 months? How much did you lose in 5 months?

It seems you were not psychological ready for this big event on your life so some errors could have been made and maybe you lacked critical support from family and friends?

1 hour ago, JenCarey12 said:

Hi Everyone,

I am 30 years old and new to this forum. What an amazing discovery it was for me!

About a year ago I decided to have WLS. I met with my surgeon, and did all the pre surgical requirements. Due to lack of support and my own fears, I backed out in December and decided not to go through with it.

I spent a lot of time convincing myself that I made the right decision, that I didn't want to become malnourished on the other end, or develop any of the other potential complications. My mom was strongly against the surgery, constantly telling me I would just eat through the sickness and gain it all back.

Fast forward 5 months, I have gained all my losses back PLUS 10lbs and am at my heaviest. I am 5 foot 2 and 430lbs. This is not an easy pill to swallow. My joints are effected greatly by all of the weight I'm carrying. I have decided that I am going to start a new program, one that will give me better tools for how to live life after surgery, and take my time with the process. I have some emotional eating to overcome while I train my brain to live a new life.

Does anyone have any advice? How did you mentally prepare for such a big life change? And did anyone do it without much support? I refuse to let anyone tell me what's best for me anymore. I know what I need to do.

So happy to be here and hopefully make some friends and a nice support system along the way.

Happy Saturday 

- Jen

Congrats on your decision. We are all her to support you.

Some suggestions to mentally prepare.

• Counseling/ therapy to work on stress and emotional eating and overcome barriers of having surgery.
• The library or purchase books on topics you want to work on.
• Start making some changes now and practice them pre surgery. Log food, hydrate, don’t drink with meals.
• talk things out with us. Ask anything

Books

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=emotional+eating+books&ref=nb_sb_noss

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=bariatric+personal+stories&ref=nb_sb_noss

https://www.amazon.com/Such-Pretty-Face-Cathy-Lamb-ebook/dp/B003IYI7L4/ref=sr_1_fkmr3_1?keywords=bariatric+such+a+pretty+face&qid=1556393382&s=gateway&sr=8-1-fkmr3

https://www.amazon.com/Emotional-Wound-First-Aid-Comprehensive-ebook/dp/B0755Q71BX/ref=sr_1_7?keywords=emotional+first+aid+kit&qid=1556393469&s=gateway&sr=8-7

You will progress out to eat real whole foods. It is sustainable long term. Here is my dieticians web site to get ideas of what food after surgery can look like.

https://karenmangum.com/tag/bariatric-friendly-main-dishes/

https://karenmangum.com/recipes/bariatric-friendly-recipes/

https://karenmangum.com/tag/bariatric-friendly-appetizers/

https://karenmangum.com/category/bariatric-friendly-desserts/

My moment came back in January of this year. I decided that I want to get healthy. More for my 4 sons. Last year I had started to gain what I had lost on my own. In 2015 I was the highest of 736lbs. I got down to 516lb but I gained 100lbs back. The day I seen the surgeon I was 601lbs. As of the 23rd of April I am 573lbs. My surgery is next Monday. I am not worried and I am not scared. I am ready for this. What made me even more sure is when I went to get my medical clearance the did my ekg and found I had a mini heart ache in the recent past. That made my choice even more solid. If you really want this you will stay with it. When you feel like you going to back down again. Stop yourself take a breath and remember why you are doing this.

13 hours ago, Mamabearof4boys said:

My moment came back in January of this year. I decided that I want to get healthy. More for my 4 sons. Last year I had started to gain what I had lost on my own. In 2015 I was the highest of 736lbs. I got down to 516lb but I gained 100lbs back. The day I seen the surgeon I was 601lbs. As of the 23rd of April I am 573lbs. My surgery is next Monday. I am not worried and I am not scared. I am ready for this. What made me even more sure is when I went to get my medical clearance the did my ekg and found I had a mini heart ache in the recent past. That made my choice even more solid. If you really want this you will stay with it. When you feel like you going to back down again. Stop yourself take a breath and remember why you are doing this.

Hey there good to see you're making a change.

Not being rude but would 736 be some kind of record?

If you need a friend I'm here.

Are you having bypass..